Girl, Get Over It: *[a] choose your own adventure [ book], [thing], [kind-of-shindig]

By Asia L Myles

This is a come-to-Jesus convo that pairs well with wine. It's a gaggle of girlfriends facing the flames, shouting, "Greater is He that is in YOU, than He that is in the world!" It's the reconciliation of a relationship, steeped in God-reality.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lakes of Greatness Productions LLC.
• Release date: Jul 15, 2022
• ISBN: 9780578859408

Asia L Myles

Asia is a Native Detroiter, With a BA in Journalism from Wayne State University. She is the Founder and Creative Director of Lakes of Greatness Productions. The co-host of the Tiddies and Tacos Podcast. The Snark-Shaman @THEEAudacitees.com. A lover of Full-Grown and Baby Jesus, her daughter, her family, full-bodied, miracle water with notes of oak and cherry, horses, and all the tacos.

Book preview

Copyright © 2022 by Asia L. Myles

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any manner or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the copyright owner, except for the use of quotations in a book review.

ISBN 978-0-5788-5938-5 (print)

ISBN 978-0-5788-5940-8 (ebook)

Publisher’s Cataloging-In-Publication Data

(Prepared by The Donohue Group, Inc.)

Names: Myles, Asia L., author.

Title: Girl, get over it : real women, real God, real relationship : *[a] choose your own adventure [book], [thing], [kind-of-shindig] / Asia L. Myles.

Description: [First edition]. | Detroit, Michigan : Lakes of Greatness Productions, [2022] | Includes bibliographical references.

Identifiers: ISBN 9780578859385 (print) | ISBN 9780578859408 (digital)

Subjects: LCSH: Christian women--Religious life. | Jesus Christ--Knowableness. | God (Christianity)--Omnipresence. | Faith.

Classification: LCC BV4527 .M95 2022 (print) | LCC BV4527 (ebook) | DDC 248.843--dc23

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021924421

Permissions and citations listed at the end of this book are considered a continuation of the copyright page.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, IL 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations taken from the Amplified® Bible (AMP), Copyright © 2015 by The Lockman Foundation Used by permission. www.Lockman.org

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from King James Version which is public domain.

Printed in the United States of America

Published by Lakes of Greatness Productions [e-mail]

Visit www.GirlGetOverIt.com

For Y’all.

For London,

Maleiya,

Autumn,

Ava,

Tristen

Abigail and Kendall.

And all the girls who will read these words and be forever changed by the grace, love, goodness, forgiveness, and mercy of a God who is especially fond of you.

Mommy, thank you for believing nothing about me was accidental; that God was intentional in my creation. For always seeing greatness when I couldn’t. For giving me a foundation of Jesus and being an unrelenting Black mama when I didn’t wanna hear it. For fighting all my battles with me when Mexicans got on boots! You are one of one. Without you, this doesn’t exist. I love you!

D, you sat me down at 14yo and explained what ‘greatness’ was and insisted that not only did I possess it, I needed to share it with the world. Thank you for encouraging this gift.

Devin, thank you for being the best father to London, and encourager, supporter, contributor, impromptu editor, preacher, listener, and educator for ME. Thank you for teaching me that our relationship with an unchanging God is individual and abstract. That He is limitless, loving, and faithful; fruitful always. Thank you for living a life that demonstrates an unwavering faith. I needed it. You are necessary and I’ll love you always.

Malika, my Sister-Mommy, your determination, encouragement and knowing you don’t play about me, is why I keep going. You are my inspiration and I love you most.

Mel, all we got is corn, mashed potatoes, and this here friendship – and it’s us ‘til the wheels fall off! Thank you for honesty, accountability, and being the best damn Godmama a kid could ask for. I love you!

Chinyere, for reminding me that the best ships are the ones that go through a storm and make it back to port. Thank you for keeping my stories no matter space or time, for a lasting sistership. Love you always.

Belle, thank you for being here at the beginning of everything, for loving me despite me and for never letting go. You saw this and encouraged it before anyone, thank you for your vision. You will always be my person, Christina.

Twin (Jameela), for meeting me in the darkness and reminding me I didn’t have to stay there. You are so loved, favored, and blessed by God. He sees you and hears you, Sis. I love you.

Brittany, my forever friend. Thank you for a lifelong friendship, for being my forever cheerleader. I’m eternally grateful that you exist. There’s no one like you. Thank you for being eager to read any and everything and demanding that I see it though. I love you!

Chris, your rando texts pulled me through when I wanted to say eff it all! Thank you for your love, the drinks, and the food! I love you!

Debra, Debbiecakes! You’ve been pushing this relentlessly for 20yrs. Here we are! Thank you for never giving up on me, believing that God had a plan for me, and reminding me of it despite me trying to ignore you and Him. You are the peacemaker! Love you!

Liz, the greatest vino-bud in the world! Thank you for creating a judgment-free zone and allowing me to vent my way through all of this, you make living a little easier. I love you, Sis!

Bri. Mah Wife, Beloved, Tina D., too many words and too damn costly to print. You’re raggedy AF but thank you for taking this Jesus-Journey with me, for being equally yoked and hating this as much as I did, but remaining obedient and encouraging it to happen anyway. Thank you for being the producer, stage manager, tech director of my m’fing life! For being Dauntie so I could write; for living this book with me and getting over your own shit. I commend you. You are Black Girl Magic. I love you ‘til death tries to part! Now, getcho ass out the acknowledgements!

Fairy Godmother (Jo), the un-shareable one. Thank you for so expertly giving yourself to others yet making me feel like you were mine to hoard. I love you. Thank you for allowing me the space to always be myself and for believing that was enough. You are a gift to me and the world. Your counsel grants healing access and I’m forever grateful for you.

Colemanator, the explicit texts were necessary, you got me to the end of this thing and I’m forever grateful! Love you!

Gilda Rogers, thank you for your eyes! Thank you for the suggestions, revisions, belief, and encouragement! I want to be like you when I grow up! I love you!

Just Melanie, thank you for making something out of nothing with the promo vids! Love you!

Cake, things are better when they’re built not just bought. Thank you for reminding me that my future was cemented in greatness, that masterpieces take time, that sometimes we must dig up the roots to plant something lasting and so beautiful. You are light.

Stuff

Introduction: Who the Hell Are You?

Prologue: The Marathon Continues

Pt. 1 Twice-Baked Revelations

Pt. 2 Tussle or Hustle

Pt. 3 Build It, or Burn It

Pt. 4 Mirror, Mirror

Pt. 5 Falling Forward

Pt. 6 Good Grief

Pt. 7 Hangry Bish

Pt. 8 Budget Baller

Pt. 9 Pack It TF Up

Epilogue: Victory Lap

Quotables & Notables

Appendix A

Notes

Supply List

Crayons

Colored Pencils

Pens, pencils, markers

Rhinestones/Gems

Glue

Stickers

Scissors

Needle

Thread

Lighter

Journal

Glitter

Nail polish

Scale

Panties

Paint/Paintbrush

Doesn’t this sound like fun??

Introduction:

Who the Hell Are You?

You must never feel badly about making mistakes ... as long as you take the trouble to learn from them. For you often learn more by being wrong for the right reasons than you do by being right for the wrong reasons. ― Norton Juster, The Phantom Tollbooth

Unqualified AF. I mean, what gives me the right to tell other women what they should be saying or doing, or how they should be living, with a past like mine, chocked full of heartache and heartbreak, love, and loss. And while I’m a degreed professional, I ain’t nobody’s doctor - mental, physical, or otherwise. I am genetically predisposed to profanity (that’s not a real thing), catch occasional attitudes, and succumb to exhaustion. I’ve been a liar and lied to; I’ve been a cheater and cheated on. I’ve played judge, jury, and executioner. I’ve failed. I’ve been homeless, unemployed, unmarried, and pregnant. I’ve eaten my feels, allowed rage to justify harboring unforgiveness, and continuously been beset by severe anxiety. I have sinnnnnnned, ooo baby, have I sinned. And yet, here I am.

I am Peter. I am Thomas. I’ve been Ruth and Rahab-ish. I’m a lot like David, Joseph, and Jonah. I’ve been disliked like Matthew and loved like John. One of the things I love most about Jesus is the folks He not only chose to hang with but to walk in discipleship with Him.

Peter was a curser, quick to scrap, and a defender of Jesus. He also denied Him three times (Matt. 26:69-74 AMP). Thomas struggled to believe Jesus was who He said He was and that He would do what He said He’d do. Jesus showed up for Tom anyway (John 20:26-29 AMP). Rahab was a whole pagan prostitute, but as a result of her obedience in assisting Israelite spies, she became the only one from her city to continue to dwell in the Promised Land and was also the direct lineage of Jesus (Josh. 2:9-13 NLT). Jesus loves the heauxs. Mary Magdalene was a demoniac battling seven demons (Mark 16:9 KJV). David was a womanizer and had Bathsheba’s hubby killed just so he could bang her back out (2 Samuel 11-12 AMP). True story. Yet, Jesus’ love for David was immeasurable and He continued to promote him, because through all his trash behavior he still had a heart for God. The Bible is riddled with regular, degular, smegular people, who were both good and bad. Used but useful. Jesus loved them and most importantly, He chose them.

That’s why I’m here. He told me to be. He told me to say things that made me uncomfortable, that made me cry. I didn’t want to do this – to be here, but I’m committed to a life of obedience, even if the road is difficult because I know that God has something great waiting for me on the other side. I’m sure of this. I have evidence of the rewards obedience yields. There’s this misconception that harvest is easy – it ain’t. Harvesting that which you’ve planted is sometimes as trying as the sowing itself. The difference being, you walk away with clearer vision having been able to witness and experience the fruit of your labor. You now know you can do it again. You’ve seen what happens when you stay the course when you thug it out. There’s abundance waiting on you.

God wants to change you, so He used me to challenge you. That’s wild. But He doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called. (Gon’ ‘head and pass the collection plate). No really, He’s got some things He wants to do through you, no matter what you’ve done or who *you* think you are. He sees who He’s created you to be, and that’s all that matters. He uses the misfits, the problem children, the outcasts, the sinners, the unlikely, so that others may see Him in them. There’s nothing you can do to separate yourself from the love of God. He has a plan for your life. And apparently, there’s nothing I could do either, cause again, here we are.

I’m just a nobody, tryna tell everybody, all about somebody who saved my soul. Nobody x Casting Crowns. So, let’s get’er done.

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Prologue:

The Marathon Continues

What it AIN’T:

Like all fun things, this book comes with a warning label: This is not an indictment of Christianity, rather an exposition into the depths of Jesus’ ability to relate not only to the orthodox docile believer, but us alleged unregenerate folk too. These pages aren’t for everyone. This book isn’t for those who easily offend. It is not for the faint of heart, all-knowing, or unwilling to grow.

What it IS:

This book is the trailer for a life with Jesus. It’s a book of bad-assery, full of scripture, evidentiary research, and requests to grab crayons and colored pencils. It’s tears, overcoming fears, changing plans, calibrating demands, and putting on ya big girl draws.

This is for women of every race, creed, age, nationality, and origin who are discovering themselves in a world doggedly attempting to bury them. This is for women of every religion, who believe in God or Spirit, energy, or the universe, who are moved by their faith and trusts something greater than themselves (I call Him Jesus, but do you, Sis). This is for potential overcomers, women who’ve got other sh*t to do than be stuck in their feels about horrible things that happened to them. For women who may be waiting for Iyanla to fix their lives.

It’s for the girls who want to take over the world and know it begins with them. This is raw, unadulterated, in-your-face-truth. It is your truth. It is your bridge.

This book pairs well with wine – because it’s a conversation. It’s transparent convo regarding real relationship with Jesus. This book is for women who curse or at minimum, want to curse. Occasionally, it’s profane, ‘cause sometimes a gosh darn just doesn’t get it done. Maybe that’s not you, but Simon Peter and I are about that life. And truth isn’t meant to glorify sin, but to elevate souls while connecting to folks who resemble you; those with an appetency for radical honesty, who reject the notion that walking with Jesus is lineal and undeviating. For most, it is not. While He may be the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, sturdy and unwavering, we waver. This walk is thrilling and angering, copious and crooked. Girl, Get Over It is a band of bishes surrounding the fire with you, reminding you that God is monolithic and too big to fail, and if He indwells, then so are you.

What May Happen:

Change, if you let it. This book will probably piss you off. But you will leave better than you came. You will be renewed and restored by the transforming of your mind, because I DID NOT WRITE THIS, Jesus did, through me, and allowed me to curse a few times. This is about being present, not perfect. This journey is a marathon.

The Marathon:

Pavement poet, entrepreneurial mastermind, activist, Grammy-nominated hip-hop artist, philanthropist, and Rollin 60s affiliated, Ermias Asghedom, aka Nipsey Hussle aka The Great was a king for a generation in need of a leader. Maybe it was the cornrows, maybe it was his commitment to Slauson and Crenshaw, maybe it was his unchanging message of building and growth. Whatever it was, it was authentic and unable to be reproduced. His art imitated his life, both past and present. A life he both lived and evolved from and a dream he shared within a culture and community who desperately needed him. He was a visionary.

What does this have to do with Jesus or Peter or Destiny’s Child or you? We all have a story and his lays a flawless foundation for your personal reconstruction. Throughout Hussle the Great’s life, was the prominent theme of the marathon. His first mixtape was called The Marathon, his clothing store and clothing brand were both named Marathon Clothing and he embodied the character and beliefs of a man running a marathon - patient, enduring, steadfast and focused. And even more impressive, he wasn’t trying to escape the hood, he was trying to bring it with him. For most of his career he refused to be a pawn remaining unsigned with major labels and opting to manage his own career until a deal arrived which served him more than the mega-label. He was the first artist with a smart store allowing customers to purchase seemingly marked-up merchandise only to discover the hidden gem of QR codes leading to unreleased music. He was truly prolific.

This is where you and Nip intersect. In an interview with Julian Mitchell, he says, You may not always have the necessary tools and resources, but you always have something. It’s about realizing there are different levels throughout your journey, and you have to be patient. Most people want to skip the process, not knowing that when you skip steps, you miss the lessons. If you start small and build on what you have, you can continue to multiply that into something greater. ¹ Let’s get some tools, let’s do some work.

Healing and getting over is a marathon. You can’t skip steps. There are parts of this book that flat-out suck due to the strain of what is being asked of you, but you can do it. You work with what you have in this moment, where you are right now. It doesn’t matter how well someone else is doing or how quickly they were able to move on from something that has you feeling stuck. God will meet you where your feet fail. But you can’t skip steps. This is a process. You might pick this book up and put it down, pick it up and put it down. And you are validated in your decision to move at the pace of your choosing. This isn’t a sprint.

Nipsey Hussle re-imagined the very definition of success. He inspired the globe, connecting people from varying backgrounds and walks of life. He was a beacon of hope and light for the oppressed and forgotten. Van Gogh with vernacular, he hustled as an ambassador for Black wealth. He influenced the block and the boardroom. He pushed the envelope and defied the narrative. He ignored the haters and decided what was most important was what he had to say about himself; what he believed about himself. He wanted better for people, so he decided to be better in order to bring them better. I assume that’s why you’re here – for something better.

Instead of trying to build a brick wall, lay a brick every day. Eventually you’ll look up and you’ll have a brick wall, he said.

One step at a time, one brick at a time, until we take that victory lap.

Here we grow.

p.s. take notes in the back of this thang on the Notables and Quotables Page!

Supplies: pen/marker/crayon & nail polish

Trace your hand, sign your name in the middle of it, then paint your nails. Once dry, turn the page!

This is the User Agreement. By tracing your hand, you are agreeing to consider new ideas, move forward and work toward letting go. You are committing to becoming the best version of you and will keep trying no matter how many times you reset.

Pg.76 (because not everyone is comfy with the C-word)

Crying. Crying is like taking your soul to the laundromat. (C’mon, Lyfe Jennings!) It’s scaling the rockiest mountain, resting at the summit, and overlooking the treachery you surmounted. It’s being covered in a million infinitesimal paper cuts. It’s cathartic AF. It allows you a moment of humanness; a moment to remove the cape you’ve been wearing so valiantly. To set it aside and stand in uncertainty, impossibility, and fruitlessness and have that be ok. To be absent of answers, admit hurt, and feel like explaining nothing to the world. It’s ok to not be ok. Girl, you’re gonna get through it. Jesus said so. Feel your feels. You gon’ make it, friend. It’s that simple. So, Cry. Scream. Get it all out. Weep silently, loudly even. Sob until you find yourself in a deep, drooling slumber. The change you desire may not happen suddenly, but it will happen. You can cry today, Sis. Nobody has to know. Your tears are safely tucked between the seams of these pages. It’s our little secret.

Cry Here. Right on the page.

(…and come back as often as you like)

Pt. 1 Twice-Baked Revelations

(Cyclical Epiphanies)

The first recipe calls for the use of shrimp, garlic, chives, Cajun seasoning, and pepper-jack cheese. The second recipe suggests using green onions, whole milk, bacon bits and cheddar cheese. Though different ingredients listed, both recipes will undoubtedly make deliciously cheesy, potato-y