The Paths of Our Invisible Strings: A Novel

By Alex Buzby

The Paths of Our Invisible Strings follows the emotional journey of a conflicted teenage girl. Leaving her boyfriend behind, Madelyn moves with her family from Arizona to begin a new life in Connecticut where she discovers new friendships, experiences, and even falling for someone.

As a tennis star, Madelyn struggles to balance h

• Language: English
• Publisher: New Degree Press
• Release date: May 4, 2022
• ISBN: 9798885041539

Book preview

cover.png

The Paths of Our Invisible Strings

The Paths of Our Invisible Strings

Alex Buzby

New Degree Press

Copyright © 2022 Alex Buzby

All rights reserved.

The Paths of Our Invisible Strings

ISBN

979-8-88504-502-5 Paperback

979-8-88504-604-6 Kindle Ebook

979-8-88504-153-9 Ebook

Dedicated to The Brown Family.

Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Chapter 47

Chapter 48

Chapter 49

Chapter 50

Chapter 51

Chapter 52

Chapter 53

Chapter 54

Chapter 55

Chapter 56

Chapter 57

Chapter 58

Chapter 59

Chapter 60

Chapter 61

Chapter 62

Chapter 63

Chapter 64

Chapter 65

Chapter 66

Chapter 67

Chapter 68

Chapter 69

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Chapter 1

The most vehement conversation we’d ever have was burned in my memory on the day I left.

I sat in the middle of everything I packed in my room, in my hometown, Scottsdale, Arizona, and called my boyfriend, Nate.

I don’t know how to feel, Nate. This hurts and I don’t want to let go, I said.

Lying in my bed with my back against the sheets, blanketed with comforters, I was so mortified and helpless. I browsed my ceiling covered with tiny white stars I stuck up when I was a kid. I imagined little me jumping high to stick them up, one by one with little fingers, and falling on my back at the end to look at my masterpiece.

I have my people here. I was hoping to stay here and graduate with you guys like we planned. I can’t leave. I can’t go, I said with a crack in my voice. It stung, not just in my nose but in my head. Unbelievable. In the morning, my family and I board a plane. A truck already came by to pick up our stuff to travel ahead: the things my mother wanted to keep, grandma’s chair, my aunt’s ottoman, and my father’s infamous architectural design line of furniture.

Nate took a sharp breath. It’ll be good, though, because you’ll be near your sister, too. We’re going to visit so often, you’ll be tired of us before you know it, he said to me. There was a pause between us. Do you know what time you’re leaving in the morning?

My nose scrunched and my face grew into a grimace. I smoothed my eyebrows to relax and dropped my shoulders, trying to focus on the pillows under me. Yeah, early. My family wants to go quick. Mia is going to meet us at the airport. She’s driving from her apartment in Boston. It’s literal hell, I said.

I’d never moved in my entire life. Across the country was too far and too much for me or my little sister to handle. I felt like I was having a midlife crisis. Maybe I was too dramatic.

Piercing silence hung between us for a couple minutes until I heard his nose sniffle. He didn’t want to admit it, but I could tell that he was heartbroken too.

I finally started the waterworks, and a gasp of air came to my mouth. We sat there, for a little bit longer, just breathing.

I wish I could see you. I was thinking of asking to change the flight to later tomorrow so you could come over, I whispered.

You should’ve. This is harder than I thought. But I will see you soon, he whispered back.

Staggered conversations passed, and when I mentioned I wanted to be alone, the phone’s beeps sent a sinking pain in my chest. I tucked my pillow closer and forced myself asleep, imagining the flights back home and the reuniting with Nate and Carlie.

My family and I left early the next morning. My younger sister, Ally, took pictures of our empty home and posted on Snapchat how sad she was, but she was the most ecstatic one out of us all. She and Mia had a closer relationship than I ever had with either one of them. In the airport, after dropping off the luggage, I trudged with my family to the gate where the plane waited for people to board. I handed the young brunette flight attendant my ticket. She eyed me and my family and smiled.

So, what’s bringing you to Connecticut? she asked.

It sounded so far away, and I hated it. I knew I did not look happy.

Moving there. I’m being dragged across the country early in my life, I said, snatching my ticket back out of her hand.

I didn’t regret turning her pasted smile into a concerned look, though I personally didn’t mean to give an attitude.

My mother apologized for me. I rolled my carry-on down the narrow row of the plane and placed it above our seats. The clean plane felt cozy, and the light from the windows glowed from the early sun, making the small space welcoming. I sat in the window seat, despite my sister’s bitching, and pressed my forehead to the side of the plane.

The light hum of the airplane vibrated against my head and right before we took off it gave me a piercing headache. I came to the realization that only my traces were left in Scottsdale when I felt the wheels no longer touching the runway. I could feel the stretch between me and Nate.

My older sister, Mia, met us at the airport to take us to our new home just on the outside suburban strip of New Haven. She ran up to Ally and me, and her warm embrace felt strange. She went to college in Boston for an architecture degree and was not graduating early, unlike her friends who left early.

My parents also thought moving closer to her would help her better with money and have our family close again. Like when we were younger in Arizona. When we were together and not thinking of anything else but only worrying about what time we would all be home for dinner.

My father and mother hugged her one by one, and it almost felt foreign how physically close we were together again.

How was the flight? she asked, happily.

My mom held her face. Very good. I am just so glad I’m holding my baby again, she said, which made me feel safe to be here as a family.

As excited as I was to see Mia, I thought about Nathan and my friends and how much I missed them already. I didn’t like how quickly this all became a reality.

We walked to the airport shuttles and grabbed our large bags, and my father reminded us that the new house had our furniture and we could pick out our rooms. It was exciting to start fresh, but I hated the feeling of starting over somewhere completely random.

Mia drove us through the city of New Haven, and we passed the tall towers of the buildings of Yale and the downtown white and gray stone buildings. The early summer trees swayed in the air with leaves hanging low and not a red familiar mountain was in sight. Even in the car, the humidity grasped my lungs like two hands squeezing a towel. The smell of rain never left my nose and the saltiness of the air stung my cheeks.

It’s really hot here. I never thought I would use the word muggy, but it’s muggy as shit, Ally called from next to me.

Allison Grace! Don’t use that language in this car, my mother gasped.

I laughed under my breath and hung my head low at my phone, scrolling through my friends’ stories.

Madie, are you thinking of any colleges here? We just passed Yale. Maybe try to apply? Even with tennis under your sleeve, Mia said over the low music.

I practically laughed. Yale? I’d have the smallest chance out of everyone applying.

My mother raised her eyebrows. You know, we could help pay for it with financial aid. Why don’t you try? You do have the extra credits from back home, and I know you have to be ahead in some sort of way.

I shrugged. Maybe then, but I highly doubt it.

I liked moving to a prestigious school area, in fact, an Ivy League school, but the certain chances of me receiving that congratulations letter was slim to none. Grades were good, but not good enough.

Won’t kill you to try, my mother finished, picking her flat shoes off with her feet.

She’s trying out for tennis here, my father said to save me from hopelessness. The high school has a really good tennis team, too. They’re ranked top ten in the Northeast, Madie. This goes for you too, Ally. We can put you into competition cheer again.

Ally snorted. Yeah, and break my arm again? No, thanks. She adjusted herself in the middle seat. I couldn’t imagine the uncomfortable feeling of being in the middle.

I turned and surveyed out the front windshield at the traffic and the people moving swiftly by. The sun was beaming against the railings of bike racks and stop signs. The city here glowed, and I remembered I was closer to New York City than ever before. New York City.

I perked up. How far is New York City from here?

Over an hour. You guys are so lucky because it’s closer to four from Boston, Mia said.

My heart skipped a beat. When can we go?

When we settle in. We have to get to the house first, baby, my mom said, patting my leg.

The idea of moving wasn’t so hard on my head anymore.

We pulled up to the modern house. The blue paneling matched the light stone, and I was already in love with it. It snuggled against similar houses in the neighborhood and sat quietly in between bigger homes with clean-cut grass and crackless driveways.

The front yard was filled with flowers and small bushes, courtesy of the previous owners. My mother was most excited about the colorful garden lining the entryway of the house. The sturdy columns in the front held up the towered porch roof and the gray and white stone in the front even matched the surrounding town perfectly.

The back big windows could be seen from the glass front doors, and I took pictures for Nate. My parents have always had an eye for good houses, even ones my father didn’t design.

You guys did better than I thought, Mia reviewed. She looked impressed.

The front foyer had our circular table and a big vase my mother received as a Christmas gift from her grandmother before she passed away. In the vase sat a great white calla lily bouquet with baby’s breaths poking in every corner.

The kitchen was dark, and the backsplash behind the stove had matching gray stone, courtesy of my father’s good friend, who happened to be married to an interior designer.

Something about the East Coast had a lot of stone and steel, which I always thought was gorgeous. Definitely different from the red and earthly colors of Arizona.

We explored the rest of the house, and I picked my room for having the biggest windows that also filled up the back wall of the home. Continuous green trees and other homes that seemed to tower over ours a bit on small hills.

The blue sky illuminated our backyard that didn’t have much gardening; my mother and Ally would soon change that, and the fencing kept our property in place. The golf course hill could be seen from my room’s window, which I didn’t mind. I wanted to learn how to play golf sooner or later.

I felt safe.

I imagined Nathan and I in this room together and how my best friend from back home, Carlie, could help me decorate with her obsession with succulent plants. She rubbed some of that obsession on me, and I’m happy she did.

I placed my bags down and pulled out my phone to take more pictures. Mia called me downstairs for dinner. The time change is something I was going to have to get used to, too. I was exhausted already.

My family gathered in the living room, and we played games until our eyes couldn’t stay open. My father promised that in the morning we would go shopping for new beds and he’d show us his new workplace.

The sleeping bag I pulled out was soft and warm and I scrolled through Pinterest for ideas for my new living space. My head clouded when I realized I was a thousand miles from everyone I knew, and tears silently streamed down the sides of my face, passing my ears and falling onto my pillow. The sadness and loneliness floated through the air like the humidity outside. I fell asleep tired and drained like the night before.

Chapter 2

A few weeks passed and Nate and I constantly texted about every little thing. My final year in high school was about to begin in a completely different place and, even with Hailey nearby, I was nervous.

Hailey and I met through our parents. Our dads both worked together, and Hailey wanted to meet me.

When we met, she instantly became my one and only friend. She took me under her wing immediately. Through her and going to mediocre summer parties, I got to know the people, the town, and the inner circle of her friends.

Nate thought it was impressive I already had such a close friend after a few encounters. He called me privileged for having connections, but I just called it dumb luck.

This is literally the beginning of something new because we have to start applying at colleges. It’s hard not to go to Yale. It’s so close but it’s also so hard to get into. Like we have to make this year work, Hailey said.

I fiddled with the remote control to put on a movie for us to watch. Yeah, it’s going to be a shit show for sure. All the new people, the stress of colleges and applications, I’m not exactly excited. I scrolled over to the for you portion of Netflix. There is nothing on Netflix. The choices of movies have sucked the past month.

Hailey dipped a small fry into her milk shake and popped it into her mouth. She grabbed the remote from my hands in one swift motion and started clicking through the comedy section. A comedy movie was interesting to her so she put it on, no matter what my opinion was.

You know if there is anything you want to talk about, you can tell me, right? You’ve been quiet, today, she said while chewing.

I didn’t even look up from my phone. Yeah, yeah, I’m just nervous for the first day. My mind instantly went to Nate and how I forgot to text him back from a couple hours ago.

How are you feeling? He texted me.

You know, the works. Knowing this year determines so much, I’m nervous, I sent back.

Don’t overthink it so much. You’re okay. Things will fall into place for you.

I didn’t know what to say after he sent me that last text because I wasn’t sure at all how this year would go. I’ve only met Hailey’s group of friends, and orientation was scary enough with a million new faces surrounding me. I put my phone down with hesitation.

Hailey got up and walked to her closet. All right, well if you do need anything, you know I’ll listen. Also, do you know what you’re going to wear because I have absolutely no idea.

Yeah, I went shopping and focused more on clothes than school supplies.

Hailey didn’t respond for a second.

I think I’ll wear this. She held up a light-pink tank top with daisies printed on it. I think this will make me look hot.

~

The first day went by slower than I intended. Hailey helped me around the school, which was enclosed. A bit different from my old school, and that sent chills down my body. The outdoor classroom setting back in Scottsdale helped with the Arizona heat and accommodated so many kids at once, but these overcrowded halls overpowered and increased my anxiety.

During the day I stayed in contact with Nate and my friends back home, who were wishing me well on my first day. I missed the familiarity of my old school.

The only thing knocking the stress out was Hailey’s promise to text me where to go for lunch.

As I was walking into the common area, the chatter of people grew louder and louder and progressed from conversations I could understand to conversations that sounded like distorted noise.

With my light blue lunch bag, I carried myself to the table where Hailey said she was sitting with her friends. I sat down on the hard plastic round stool next to her, making a creak among the rumbling. The two girls she was with smiled and waved while reintroducing themselves to me. I recalled seeing them from a party a couple weeks back, but I knew they’d been too drunk to even remember meeting me.

Hailey took out her sandwich and began talking about the cute senior boy in her algebra class. She was planning on a head start to college, so her interest was mainly older boys.

So, there’s this guy in my class, his name is Ben and, good God, this guy is the definition of heaven, Hailey squealed.

Delilah, across from Hailey, clapped, Thank God, someone other than someone from our grade.

Congrats, you’re no longer going for younger guys, the girl next to Delilah, Sadie, I think, said while putting a white powdered donut in her mouth.

Whatever. He’s hot and I’m going to get his Snapchat, Hailey said. She pushed her hair back behind her shoulders with her long white nails and picked up her sandwich.

My phone gave a ping notification, and I instantly snatched it up.

Whoa, who are you expecting to text you right now? Hailey asked me.

It wasn’t Nate. My mom, I lied. I’ve been waiting for her to text me back to see if she could get me after the tennis meeting. I didn’t drive this morning. I’m still waiting on a parking spot to open up in the senior lot.

Hailey reached over to grab a grape from my bag and didn’t say anything.

Do you think you’ll make the team this year, Madelyn? You said you were trying out for the team, right? Delilah asked.

I grinned with some hope. Yeah, I hope so. I really want to make, maybe, varsity here. Is the competition good? I popped the remaining grapes into my mouth.

Well, yeah. That girl over there in the black T-shirt is Blake. She normally sits with us, but the season is about to begin so she sits with teammates. She’s supposed to be the team’s star player, so she’ll be tough to beat, but I have a feeling you’ll make it. You played varsity back home? Or just travel?

Both, I said and glanced over Blake.

She was sitting with a group of friends who all looked like they played sports, with their tennis book bags and muscular structures. Sadie shifted in her seat, which grabbed all our attention.

Vivian is walking in here in a sec. She had to talk to her teacher about after school activities for her psychology class, which I highly doubt was the subject of the conversation. There she is, she said, waving toward the entrance of the common area.

The waving girl I picked out had to be Vivian. She walked, quickly, with her slicked blond hair behind her shoulders and one arm around her book bag strap. Her jeans fit her legs tight, and her white T-shirt was filled and bouncing as she trailed in front of people.

She grinned with straight bright white teeth and her eyes rolled off Sadie to me. She sat next to Sadie without taking her eyes from mine and introduced herself as Vi. I did a wave back and then put both my hands into my lap. The intimidation was growing with every second of her presence.

So, you’re the new girl from Arizona? Phoenix, right? she asked in a voice so high, some syllables could only be heard by dogs.

Close. Scottsdale, which is like thirty minutes from Phoenix, I claimed.

She nodded and then peered at Hailey. What is new on your boy toy? Has he asked you out somewhere yet? she asked, disregarding me already.

She