Elephant on my Chest

By Ashleigh Stevens

He's the vile boy next door. Who also knows her biggest secret.

Sixteen-year-old Izzy is excited about the all-school ski trip. She is looking forward to learning to ski, even if she will be the only one on the bunny hill. Of course, she has to first make it through a five-hour bus ride with the vilest—albeit cutest—boy in school. And survive the roommates who keep breaking her one rule: "No sleeping with your boyfriend in my bed!"

When an unexpected power outage triggers a panic attack, Izzy is forced to tell Pug her biggest secret. She's even more surprised to learn his, spending the rest of the long weekend looking at her enemy in a new light.

But their secrets are nothing compared to the one Izzy's mother has been keeping for sixteen years. When Izzy discovers the truth, she must learn to confront her panic disorder or else live with the elephant sitting on her chest.

Warning: This book describes panic attacks. If this will trigger you, this book may not be for you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ashleigh Stevens
• Release date: Jan 31, 2022
• ISBN: 9798201964504

Ashleigh Stevens

Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved reading and learning so much that she wanted to share her writing with others. She wrote her first novella at twelve-years-old, although it has never been published. She continued writing for the next twenty years, developing a writing style and finding a comfortable genre. In 2010, just before the birth of her first child, Ashleigh decided to publish her first novel. Not long after, Ashleigh decided to become a stay-at-home mother in order to spend time with her daughter and continue her writing. Currently, Ashleigh lives in Southern Connecticut with her husband and her four beautiful children, whom she homeschools. In her spare time, Ashleigh continues working on her novels, hoping to publish more soon.

Book preview

Elephant

on my

Chest

Ashleigh Stevens

This is a work of fiction. Similarities to real people, places, or events are entirely coincidental.

ELEPHANT ON MY CHEST

First edition, 2022

Copyright ©2022 Ashleigh Stevens

All rights reserved.

ISBN 9798201964504

Edited by

Work In Progress Wonders

www.WIPwonders.com

Other Works by Ashleigh Stevens

Young Adults

Camp Piquaqua

Hartfield Chronicles

Romances

Kayaks, Kisses & Monsters

Mooncrossed

Mysteries

(writing as Carrie Latimer)

One Night In Sedona

To receive updates on new releases,

join my newsletter or visit

www.AshleighsStevensBSB.com

Chapter 1

THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST WEEKEND EVER. Sophia draped her arm around my shoulder. Three nights. No parents.

I glanced across the school parking lot. Yeah. And the fact that your boyfriend is in the next room has nothing to do with it?

Sophia giggled, releasing me as Ethan made his way toward us. Nah. That’s just a bonus.

I rolled my eyes, looking around. It surprised me to see so many students going on the annual school ski trip. Somehow, there were enough of us to fill two buses. Surely, someone else was a beginner. Maybe I wouldn’t be the only one on the bunny hill.

Then again, nearly everyone was stowing skis in the compartments under the bus. Newbies wouldn’t have their own equipment, would they?

Sophia? Would— Turning, I found my friend unable to speak due to the fact that her boyfriend’s tongue was halfway down her throat. I elbowed her, probably a little harder than I should have.

She frowned at me. Was that really necessary, Iz?

I nodded my head toward our English teacher. Mr. Dodd was the one who had organized the trip this year. I figured Sophia wouldn’t want to get on his bad side before we got to the mountain.

Sophia snorted, but she did take a small step away from Ethan as Mr. Dodd glanced in our direction. Lacing her arm through mine, she dragged me toward the bus.

Come on. Ava and Riley said they’d save us seats.

As soon as we boarded, our friends waved from the back of the bus. While they moved to sit with their boyfriends, Sophia slid into the row behind Ava with a groan.

"Did you have to pick the seats closest to the bathroom?"

Ava shrugged. These were the only four rows left if we wanted to sit together.

Across the aisle, Riley giggled. These are the best seats. We can do whatever we want back here.

I shook my head, standing on the aisle seat behind Sophia to stow my bag in the overhead compartment. I was pretty sure Riley would spend most of our five-hour drive with her tongue in Alex’s mouth. It wouldn’t surprise me if some hands ended up under some shirts. Thankfully, the bathroom more or less blocked them from my view.

I sat with my back against the window, lifting the armrest between the two seats and stretching my legs in front of me. For once, I was happy to be barely over five feet tall. My heels were still comfortably resting on the seat.

Until my least favorite person in the world lifted them to sit beside me. I glared at him as I folded my legs beneath me.

Eww. Go away, Pug, before I catch an STD.

He sent me a cocky smile, leaning close so only I could hear him. That’s not how they’re transmitted. Would you like me to explain it to you, Pickles?

No. And don’t call me Pickles.

Piccolo. Puglisi.

I looked up to see Mr. Dodd in the aisle beside us, a stack of folders in his arms. He flipped through them, removing two and handing them to us before moving to Sophia and Ethan.

Pug immediately opened his. I’m in Room 205. He leaned on the seat in front of him to look over Ethan’s shoulder. Sweet. We’re roomies.

In the next row, Jayden turned around. 205. Alex?

Riley’s boyfriend smiled brightly. You know it. Where are you ladies?

I glanced at my paperwork. I was in Room 307. Apparently, so were my friends. Sophia closed her folder.

So, did anyone see the forecast for this weekend?

Ethan nodded. Supposed to get pounded tonight.

Pug bumped his fist. Sweet. Freshies.

I rolled my eyes. What does that mean? And why are you still here? Go sit not here.

Can’t. Bus is full.

I shook my head. No. You are not sitting next to me for the next five hours. Ethan, switch with me.

He swung an arm around Sophia with a laugh. Sorry, Izzy. Not happening.

I sent a pleading look across the aisle, but Riley already had her face smashed against her boyfriend. Since Ava was silent, I was pretty sure she was in a similar position. Scowling, I stared out the window as the bus pulled away from the school. Mr. Dodd used the overhead speakers to drone on about the rules that were outlined in our folder. When he finally finished, he had us vote on which movie we wanted to watch.

I had no interest in the slapstick comedy that won the majority vote. I pulled out my phone, realizing almost immediately that my headphones were in my bag. Sighing, I turned to Pug.

I need my bag.

He raised his eyebrows. So?

So, I need you to move so I can get it.

He climbed out of the row, making a sweeping gesture toward the aisle. I stood on his seat to press the button on the compartment.

He laughed from behind me. What are you doing?

I told you. Getting my bag. I reached into the bin. Great. Pug’s bag was in my way.

Get down before you get hurt.

I’m vertically challenged. I pulled Pug’s bag out of the compartment, throwing it at him as I reached back in.

I’ll get your bag.

You’re not touching my things. I stood on the armrest so I could see in. Pug had smashed my bag all the way into the back.

The bus turned onto the highway and I nearly lost my balance. Pug’s hands were around my waist before I could grab the bottom of the overhead bin.

I glared at him. Get your hands off of me or lose them.

Pickles, get down before you get hurt. I can get your bag.

I grabbed the handle of my bag, pulling it free and stepping off the armrest. As I crawled back into my seat, I turned to Pug. You can close the bin.

Shaking his head, he returned his bag to the compartment. By the time he settled back into his seat, I had found my headphones and was already streaming Mapleview Mysteries. Pug leaned close to me, his breath tickling my neck as he pulled the earbud from my ear.

The butler did it.

Giving him the finger, I returned the headphone to my ear.

AFTER A COUPLE OF HOURS, THE BUS PULLED OFF THE highway just over the Vermont border. It parked beside our second bus in the back of a very large shopping plaza. Mr. Dodd blocked our exit.

You will have one hour for lunch. Now is also a good time to use the restrooms. We will not be stopping again until we reach the resort.

Although the back of the bus was great for giving my friends privacy, it also meant we were the last ones to disembark. Ethan looked around as he surveyed our options. Burgers, tacos, subs, pizza. What sounds good?

I turned in a circle, looking at the various fast-food restaurants. I want a salad.

Jayden scoffed. You can get that anywhere. I’m voting burgers.

Ava shook her head. I’m with Izzy. I want a real salad, not the little side salad at the burger place. Maybe soup. It’s cold!

Sophia shivered beside her. I know, right? I vote soup.

Of course, the restaurant that had fresh soups, salads, and sandwiches was the furthest from the buses. Most of our classmates had chosen to eat elsewhere, so the place wasn’t too crowded. As an added bonus, we had managed to lose Pug.

After ordering my southwest chicken salad and black bean soup, I searched for a table while I waited for my meal. Sophia sat beside me a moment later.

So, what’s up with you and Pug?

Eww. Don’t even joke about that.

Ava sat across from me. Joke about what?

I shook my head. Nothing. What’d you order?

While we ate our lunch, we debated whether we should bring back some food for the bus. Ava and Riley wanted to grab coffee. Apparently, they believed that being juniors meant we were old enough. I pointed out it was disgusting, but no one listened to me.

While my friends wasted their money at the coffee shop, I stopped at a convenience store for a large diet soda instead. I grabbed a bag of strawberry licorice twists and some baked sour cream chips before returning to the bus. Pug reached it at the same time as me.

He gestured toward the door. Ladies first.

I glared at him before making my way up the stairs. Most of my classmates had returned. Many had fast food bags with them. Since the bus smelled like greasy fries, I suspected they had eaten on board instead of in the restaurants.

I saw a few raised eyebrows as I made my way to the back of the bus. These people didn’t think Pug and I were together, did they? The last thing I wanted was for his reputation to soil my own good name. Not that I cared what people thought of me. Well, maybe a little.

Can you go any slower, Pickles?

I stepped back slightly to press my heel onto Pug’s toe. As he swore, I increased my pace to my seat.

Mr. Dodd was halfway through his headcount when my friends finally returned. Ethan bumped fists with Pug as he took his seat.

Where’d you go, man?

Pug shrugged. Grabbed a burger. Paige Landry was all over me, so I didn’t stay long.

Sophia raised her eyebrows. I thought she was with Alex Ryder.

Ava leaned over her seat, shaking her head. No. That’s Paige Cummings. Paige Landry was with William Guido, but they broke up last week when he kissed Mackenzie Fryer.

Sophia nodded knowingly. That’s right. I remember the fight during lunch.

As the bus made its way out of the lot, Mr. Dodd turned on a sci-fi movie I had no intention of watching. Before I could pull out my phone, Ethan held up his.

I got the perfect game. He placed it to his forehead so we could see the screen, but he couldn’t. Give me clues to guess the word.

Sophia sat a little straighter. Oh. I’ve played this. Okay. It’s a book.

Oh, that narrows it down.

Sophia hit her boyfriend playfully. No. We read it in English last year.

Pug shook his head. We watched the movie in class. The nanny with the double-Ds falls in love with her boss.

Ethan grinned. Jane Eyre.

When Sophia nodded, he passed the phone to Pug. After he correctly guessed the name of a television show, he handed it to me.

Sophia made a face. How am I supposed to describe that?

Ethan frowned. It lives in the sea. It’s a type of—oh, I can’t say that word. Oh. But it’s a mammal. People like to eat their eggs.

I raised my eyebrows. How does that work? A sea mammal that lays eggs?

Sophia looked as confused as me. Yeah. That’s a good point.

Ethan shook his head. Figure it out later. Um, it’s white.

Pug smirked at me. Bonnie.

My favorite stuffed whale flashed across my mind. I glared at him. Beluga.

Sophia sent me an incredulous look. How was that a clue?

I shook my head. Long story. Your turn.

After a while, Ava and Jayden detached their lips long enough to join our game. We switched to the mode where we had to see who could get the most words right in one minute. Although I won nearly every round, I was annoyed that it was largely a result of Pug’s clues. He somehow related the words back to incidents from when we were younger. It irked me to have that kind of connection to someone so vile.

Eventually, I grew bored and went back to my Mapleview Mysteries with my soda and snacks. By the end of the first episode, I had a problem.

Pug, let me out.

Why?

I gotta pee. Let me out.

He smirked. What if I don’t?

I couldn’t threaten him with much. He was bigger than me and my full bladder was overriding most of my thoughts. I grabbed the bottle of water he had wedged between himself and the armrest, holding it precariously over his lap while I moved to loosen the cap.

Let me out or you’ll be wearing this and I’ll tell everyone you peed your pants.

Or I just let you do it for real and let you be the laughingstock.

Ugh. I threw the bottle at him and put my feet on my chair. Forget it.

Grabbing Ethan’s seat, I stepped over Pug’s lap. Unfortunately, I had to lean toward the row in front of me and got an unwanted view of his hand under my best friend’s shirt. As I stumbled into the aisle, I saw a similar scene between Riley and Alex.

Didn’t they have anything better to do? Disgusted, I disappeared into the lavatory.

And immediately felt my chest tighten.

I tried to make the visit as quick as possible, but I couldn’t catch my breath. My heart was racing as I used the toilet. When I was done, I could hardly stand. My legs didn’t want to support me.

I washed my hands, opening the door as quickly as I could. Almost immediately, Pug jumped out of his seat.

Pickles. You okay?

I was still having trouble standing. I practically tumbled across the aisle, grateful my seat was so close. Fine.

Pug slid beside me cautiously. You look like you saw a ghost. The bathroom’s not haunted, is it?

I took a sip of my soda, then a deep breath. I could feel my heart rate returning to normal. No. I’m fine.

Pug didn’t look convinced, but he stopped asking questions as I resumed my show. Thankfully, I managed to avoid him for the rest of the ride.

Chapter 2

I CALL DRESSER, RILEY ANNOUNCED, PUSHING PAST the rest of us to be the first to enter our hotel room. I was the last one in, unsurprised to see my friends already exploring the room to claim their territory.

I want the closet. Ava opened the door across from the bathroom.

I raised my eyebrows. Can’t we share? I mean, how much stuff did you bring?

Sophia hefted her suitcase onto the bed by the window. Well, you know we need to be prepared for different situations.

We’re skiing. What else is there?

Well, there’s breakfast and dinner in the restaurant. Sometimes there are dances down at the lounge. She turned to the other girls, who were already unpacking. Should we make a room schedule?

Riley shrugged. The boys already did. Alex and I have from eight to nine.

Ava turned from the closet. Ooh. Then I claim eight to nine here.

I glanced between my friends. What are you talking about?

Sophia shook her head. I’ll make you a schedule. Times you should stay out of the room because we want some alone time with the guys.

Eww. I glanced at the bed Sophia and I were sharing. Not in my bed.

The girls giggled, but I was serious. This was my room, too. I wasn’t comfortable with their plan. But I wasn’t going to argue with them. I would just have to think up excuses to be in my room before they showed up with their boyfriends. I had the feeling I was in for a weekend of headaches and stomach cramps.

While the girls unpacked, I took a quick shower. Five hours of Pug breathing on me made me feel unclean. I left the door unlocked so my friends could store their toiletries on the counter. By the time I had scrubbed off all the cooties, there wasn’t an inch of space left.

I examined the products as I combed out my hair. I knew Riley needed her straightener and Ava couldn’t live without her anti-frizz spray. But why was there so much makeup? And who had brought full-sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner? Didn’t they know the hotel supplied that stuff?

Rolling my eyes, I wrapped a towel around myself and went to see if my friends had finished moving in. Riley had saved a couple of drawers for Sophia. Ava had room for us to hang our coats, but not much more. I didn’t mind. I could live out of my bag for a few days.

I had just thrown on a dress when there was a knock on the door. Ava didn’t even ask if I was decent before opening it to the boys. Glaring at her, I returned to the