Life Puzzles

By Paul Arnold

Here are nine intriguing stories and two plays for radio. 

Looked after children take over their home and plot revenge.

Two men fall to their deaths in very different circumstances.

A man worries that he will die before he can return his library books.

Billy in his prison cell reflects on his mental state.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Maple Publishers
• Release date: Nov 15, 2021
• ISBN: 9781915164070

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Life Puzzles

Author: Paul Arnold

Copyright © Paul Arnold (2021)

The right of Paul Arnold to be identified as author of this work has been asserted by the author in accordance with section 77 and 78 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

First Published in 2021

ISBN 978-1-915164-06-3 (Paperback)

978-1-915164-07-0 (Ebook)

Cover Design and Book Layout by:

White Magic Studios

www.whitemagicstudios.co.uk

Published by:

Maple Publishers

1 Brunel Way,

Slough,

SL1 1FQ, UK

www.maplepublishers.com

A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or translated by any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system without written permission from the author.

The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Human Resources

Arcadia House

The Cliff Path

Dark Voices

The Boy Who Was Too Nice

Library Books

Billy

Teddy Bear

Egg Basket

Conservatory Crisis

White Pigeon

Human Resources

Gavin looked up from the insurance claim. Usually, the back of Brian’s head was in his line of vision. But today it was a large fish’s tail fin moving lazily from left to right and back again. He quickly glanced at the filing cabinet. It was still there but an octopus was sitting on its top next to Gavin’s bicycle helmet and gloves. The animal was holding one of Gavin’s sandwiches in a tentacle and taking bites with its bony beak.

Gavin breathed out in disbelief and bubbles of air slowly rose to the ceiling. He put the claim back into the folder. He got up and began to walk towards the door but the air seemed thick and sticky.

It was lunch time and as the octopus had stolen his sandwiches he decided to go to the coffee shop. Outside the office building, there were, as far as he could see, no fish or any other sea or freshwater creatures.

He ordered a hot chocolate with marshmallows and a sausage balm with brown sauce. He took a copy of the Daily Mirror out of the rack. Someone had neatly torn the crossword out.

Julie came from behind the counter and sat opposite him. She placed her elbows on the Formica and supported her beautiful oval face in her palms. She said, How’s work? He replied, Like always, excruciatingly and mind deadeningly dull. I think I might be going mad, or something like that. There was an uncomfortable long silence. He whispered, Sorry Julie. Another silence.

Then Gavin asked, What’s happened to your arm, Julie?

My wrist brushed against a razor blade.

He noticed a stain of bright arterial blood on the bandage.

Thought you’d stopped that. So dangerous.

Julie said, I’ve got the crossword. Look.

Clue: Four letter word for Hades. Must be Hell but it doesn‘t fit."

Customer, just be a minute.

Gavin looked at the ‘across’ and ‘down’ clues and hummed:

"I don’t know why I love you but I do

My days have been so lonely

My nights have been so blue"

It repeated in his mind like a tape loop. An earworm, why now? Where had it come from?

Julie came back with two little apple pies each covered by a Matterhorn of cream.

Gavin said Thanks Julie. Then he asked: How’s your brother getting on with his new degree? Theology isn’t it? Unusual. But perhaps there are jobs at the end of it.

"Yes, our Lionel loves it. He’s doing a Heaven and Hell module at the moment.

"He says the Church of England doesn’t do Hell anymore. It was a kind of metaphor, a story for old fashioned people. Says it was abolished in a court case. Williams v Bishop of Salisbury (1863), where it was decided that eternal damnation is not part of the doctrine of the Church of England.

It’s been replaced by love. Not quite the same, is it?"

This pie is gorgeous. What about Heaven?

Yes, hmm, says Heaven is more complicated. They’re still working on it. A conversation. I don’t know who with exactly. Must ask him.

Gavin said, And perhaps you can ask him whether Heaven would be boring? Like working in, say, you’ve guessed it, an insurance office?

Promise. He should be back from college soon.

Thanks for the pie. Shall we meet tomorrow? Better get back to work.

The office looked just the same except that a shark was swimming round the room. It looked very like the manager. The octopus and the sandwiches had gone. Everyone else was busy at their desks.

Gavin thought of going to see his GP but decided not to. Last time the doctor suggested anti-depressants and steered the conversation round to cricket. Perhaps later. Maybe not.

The second hand was moving on the big clock.

Gavin took the insurance folder out of the filing cabinet. It was about a horse damaging a car. Do I care? No, I do not.

He googled Self-Harm. The office discouraged time wasting Googling, or games like Patience, or porn. Porn was the worst.

Self-harm is most often described as a way to express or cope with emotional distress. There are many possible causes of emotional distress. It’s often a build-up of many smaller things that leads people to think about self-harm.

Gavin looked up and a plump Carp was staring at him. It said, What are you going to do about it, Gav?

Gavin’s mind filled with her wounded wrist and lovely face together with the sweetness of the cream and the tart apple. His throat was dry and butterflies fluttered below the desk.

Another day creaked wearingly along. Time slowed down. More bonkers boring claims and semi-literate angry letters. Best not to bring sandwiches to work.

Worryingly, there was now a mixture of freshwater and sea fish. Quite unrealistic. Impossible.

Then the Carp said, Someone to see you. At the door. It was Lionel, smiling, holding a green envelope.

The note said, Gavin I do love you but I’m going away today. Julie.

Lionel said, Don’t know where to or for how long. Sorry. Nice to meet you.

Gavin forgot to ask her brother about the current status of Heaven.

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Arcadia House

The doorbell rattled and twanged though the drafty hallway.