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  • The Oldie

    Just when I thought I’d found the perfect excuse to bunk off work...

    Jun 30, 2021 3 minutes
    JEM CLARKE

    Jem Clarke is in his very, very early fifties, is five foot zero inches tall and has never left the family home in Cleethorpes, which he still shares with his parents…

    During the communal breakfast we share, I had no choice but to tell my parents I had lost my job.

    After breakfast, everything takes precedence over conversation – hospitallevel cleaning regimes; omnibuses; ironing with ; sleeping through . All of them are blockers to my imparting my not insignificant news to this whiskery couple.

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