Lift up My Eyes

By Sue Lammers

The “road less traveled” can be filled with danger, beauty, and fulfillment. A simple instance of school bullying sends a couple of students on an adventure they and those around them could never have seen coming, leading to history and destruction, the future and reconciliation.

• Language: English
• Publisher: LifeRich Publishing
• Release date: Oct 14, 2020
• ISBN: 9781489731494

Sue Lammers

Sue Lammers is a wife, mom, and homesteader. She has always been an avid reader and storyteller, especially if the story leads people to Christ.

Book preview

Chapter 1

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Almost finished… there you go. All set. Beth gave the hair tie one last twist at the end of Emmy’s strawberry blond braid and let it drop. My turn! She said brightly, and swiftly plaited her own dark hair in a single thick rope down her back. Emmy played with the tassels at the ends of hers as she watched her older sister. Beth didn’t linger at the mirror when she’d finished her hair; she never bothered with cosmetics anyway. She was the only seventeen-year-old of Emmy’s acquaintance who didn’t, though granted, there weren’t that many girls Beth’s age in this small mountain town, and fewer still would give a nine-year-old more than a passing glance.

Neither sister spoke further as they gathered Emmy’s school books and Beth’s heavier-than-usual backpack and slipped out the door of their shared room. It was unlikely that they would disturb their mother, but if they did after a night of drinking, she would be either angry and delay them with yelling, or maudlin and delay them with things she wanted them to do for her. Not make her breakfast at least; Beth sighed softly and figured her mother’s breakfast would probably be whatever beer was left from last night. She found it somewhat ironic that she preferred the days when her mother would eat breakfast, though it made it harder to get out the door on time. On those days, Cate might not be cheerful, but she’d be civil.

Cate’s room door was opposite that of the girls’ at this end of the trailer home, and it stood open. The room was empty, so the girls tiptoed as quietly as they could down the hall toward the living area and kitchenette. Sure enough, there was Cate, passed out in the shabby recliner. Her tawny hair was half fallen out of its clip, the loose part tossed carelessly over the back of the chair. One hand lightly grasped a beer can balanced precariously on the shredded upholstery of the arm, sure to fall if she shifted. On the chipped side table next to the chair was an empty whiskey bottle, so last night’s date must have gone well, Beth thought with disgust as they made their quiet way across the old shag carpet. No wonder the noise of raucous laughter had been enough to keep her and Emmy awake until midnight. She got apples for herself and her sister from the fridge – no concern that their mother would miss anything like fresh fruit – and then the girls were out the door and on their way.

Emmy took Beth’s hand as they walked up the road to the small elementary school. She’d get teased for it if the other kids saw her, but she didn’t care. She hated seeing her mom like that, and it always made her turn to her sister for comfort. Beth never turned her away or told her she was too big; she knew exactly why Emmy wanted to hold her hand. If she was honest with herself, which she was actually pretty good at, she needed the comfort too.

Beth glanced up the road ahead of them – and up, and up. The road rose rather steeply just in the quarter mile to the elementary school, then sloped slightly downhill briefly, back up farther into the mountains past shops and the high school, and through a long saddle before plunging downward into the next valley. This morning the tops of the mountains were shrouded with white, and the sun was fleeting. Beth hoped it wouldn’t rain on their field trip up there today. She’d begged a heavy leaf bag from the school janitor yesterday to supplement her secondhand raincoat, but she preferred to need neither.

Beth gave Emmy an extra big hug at the school gate. You’ll be home before I am tonight, she reminded her little sister, holding her close. Do your homework as best you can, and I’ll help you with whatever you get stuck on when I get back, or we’ll do it tomorrow. Stay in our room as much as you can, and remember if Mom brings a date home, take the chair from the desk and wedge it under the doorknob. Don’t move it for anyone but me. Emmy nodded emphatically against her sister’s slight bosom. They’d both seen enough of their mother’s occasional drunken dates to not want to see any more. Beth kissed the top of Emmy’s head and sent her on her way inside, and as she turned away to continue up the road, a fat drop of rain struck her head and she looked up behind her with a wry face. Sure enough, there were big gray clouds coming up the mountain. With a quick prayer that they’d stall farther down the mountain than her class was to travel, she hurried along.

The school Beth attended was chartered. Here in the remote Northern Rockies, charter schools and home schooling were quite common of necessity. The only other options were either long commutes by winding roads to far-flung public schools or attending a boarding school. The less wealthy and more frugal families of the village availed themselves of the charter school, and most of the rural families taught their children at home. Sometimes Beth envied the homeschoolers – they learned far more than the usual subjects, with their parents often teaching them the ancient skills of hunting, trapping, and fishing, including what to do with their prey; as well as foraging edible and medicinal plants. Needless to say, nothing short of adoption into a rural family would make that possible for her. A pity, because Beth had a fascination with the old ways that struck even her as rather strange.

Today, however, there was little room for that jealousy. Under the charter, her school did have rather more freedom of curriculum than the average public school, and often stretched that freedom to the fullest. This morning Beth hurried to join a mob of sleepy-faced students already gathered outside the school, many of whom were pulling up hoods, adjusting Stetsons and ball caps, and grumbling at the rain. A line of rented yellow buses and various vehicles belonging to teachers and chaperones waited to receive them, surrounded by coolers, first aid kits, and innumerable backpacks. Not so unusual a sight for a school field trip anywhere in the States, but for a scattered showing of rifle and shotgun cases. This school was one of only a handful in the country that had added firearms classes. More normally, teachers with clipboards and harried looks skirted the crowd, noting faces and marking down those in attendance.

Beth did her best to join the student body without actually being noticed. She nearly succeeded, but a couple of nearby cheerleaders, always on the lookout for someone to either sneer at or flirt with, happened to glance her way just as she arrived. True to form they exchanged cruel, superior looks, and started to say something. Beth cringed inwardly in anticipation, but before either could speak a bullhorn squealed with feedback, and all the students turned to see the athletic director, now standing on the bumper of one of the pickups, wincing at the shriek. Amid the scattered laughter, Mr. Thompson cleared his throat and tried again.

Alright everybody, we’re almost ready. Most of you have given me the names of those you’ve partnered with for the day, but I’m missing some. As you know, for safety’s sake you are required to be paired, and one member of each team must have and be proficient with some form of long gun. Where we’re going, there are bears, wolves, wolverines, and any number of other animals ready, willing, and able to have you for breakfast if you don’t have protection. So! Everyone who’s partnered! Seniors to the front bus, juniors the second, and so forth. Show your partnership and firearm to the teachers at the doors before boarding, and remember to keep all guns and ammo firmly secured until we reach our destination, no exceptions! Anybody removing guns from cases will wait with the buses until the rest of us return from the hike at suppertime! He glowered down at them all to drive home the point, then continued.

Those of you who have not submitted a partnership, come over here and I will pair you off. Beth did her best to ignore the snickering girls as she shuffled over to Mr. Thompson. Well of course she didn’t have a partner. Who wanted to spend the day wandering the woods with the daughter of a woman who sold herself for booze? Even if one did, surely their parents would subsequently make unsubtle comments about apples and trees.

Mr. Thompson had switched off the bullhorn and was now perched on the tailgate of the truck. A handful of teens clustered around him, some with gun cases, some without. Okay, who do we have? Mr. Thompson scanned the kids in front of him and consulted his clipboard. A little unbalanced for grades, but at least the guns even out. Quickly he matched up a few odd sophomores and freshmen and shooed them toward the buses. That leaves you two. Are you a senior? Beth watched the tall boy with brown curls and a canvas rifle case over his shoulder nod. Sorry, I think you must be new. What’s your name?

Euan Gillespie, the boy answered, and his name was found and checked off the paper.

Different spelling, seems like most these days use a ‘w’ instead of a ‘u.’

Yeah, my parents are old-fashioned that way, Euan remarked cheerfully.

Alrighty then, Mr. Gillespie, meet Elizabeth Andrews. If you haven’t already heard, the rules are you make like you’re handcuffed together from now until we’re back at this spot later this evening. You have each other’s backs, you hear? Euan, Elizabeth may not have a gun but she’s got eyes and ears. Watch out for each other. Now, front bus, both of you. I’m riding with the freshmen if anyone needs me.

Beth cast Euan a wary look as they walked up the line, but the one he returned was nothing but cordial, his brown eyes soft and kind. He held out his hand. Pleased to meet you, Elizabeth, he said pleasantly.

Beth’s fine, she said, taking the proffered handshake and smiling shyly. Then she bit her lip and slowed as they approached their class, and decided to bite the bullet. Taking a deep breath, she warned, Look, Euan, I’m going to apologize in advance. You seem nice, and you’re new, so you don’t deserve the torture you’re going to go through being stuck with me.

He laughed. Grumpy, are you? Or asthmatic and liable to be slow up on the mountain?

She didn’t smile. No, but I have a certain reputation. I don’t deserve it myself, but people our age can be cruel, and you are about to be tarred with the same brush. She flushed and checked his face to see how he was taking this. He frowned, and his scowl deepened as he saw some of their classmates looking out the bus windows at them and starting to laugh derisively. I really am sorry, she said miserably.

Euan squared his shoulders, deliberately cleared his face, and smiled at her. Don’t even, he said reassuringly. Fortunately for me, my self-esteem isn’t dependent on the approval of a bunch of immature brats. He didn’t raise his voice, but he didn’t trouble himself to whisper either. A few of the other seniors had opened their bus windows, and Beth heard gasps from inside as the laughter cut off and shocked murmurs began.

Are you crazy?! she whispered fiercely as they prepared to board. I am the absolute bottom of the pecking order here! Don’t sabotage yourself by being friendly to me, the school year’s barely started!

Foot on the bottom step, he shrugged the strap of his gun case higher against his knapsack as he turned and whispered back, I’ve been homeschooled ’til now. Don’t give a flying fiddle about pecking orders. He grinned and winked at her, then turned and mounted the steps with complete confidence. Beth stared after him rather enviously for a moment before following, not without a great deal of trepidation.

Blatant stares and whispers followed Euan and Beth toward the back of the bus. The school was small enough that the entire senior class only took up about half the seats, but the other half were filled with backpacks and weapons for the day’s trip. Each pair of students took a seat, and deposited their loads in the opposite seat, or the seat behind or ahead. Beth thought with some annoyance that it might have occurred to some of her classmates that more than one pair of backpacks could have occupied a seat, but she knew the futility of pointing this out.

It seemed she was wrong. Having arrived at the emergency door without finding an empty seat, Euan turned to the nearest pair of students. So sorry, he said, far too politely, but could you move your things so we can sit down? Wouldn’t want the chaperone to get on and see us ready to bounce around standing up for the whole ride. Whether it was Euan’s natural self-assurance or the reminder of oncoming supervision, the two boys sneered and moved their bags. Beth had to turn her head so they wouldn’t see her bug-eyed expression.

Gesturing to the empty seat, the absolute last, Euan offered Beth the window. She took it without thinking, too stunned by Euan’s confident demeanor to even consider otherwise. The moment they were seated, having stuffed their equipment under their bench, a woman in brand new hiking clothes of the latest expensive fashion bounded up the bus steps, followed more slowly by the grizzled driver. Hi, everyone! she exclaimed brightly. I’m Mrs. Collins, Angelica’s mom! She waved and winked adoringly at her daughter, and to Beth’s disgust one of the scornful cheerleaders from earlier simpered and waved back. I’m your chaperone for today, what fun! Mrs. Collins continued, and Beth ducked her head down to roll her eyes. Euan looked at her questioningly, but she shook her head. Later.

I’m sure we’re all in for an absolutely fabulous time, and I just know you are too. Time to hit the road! Yay! She clapped her hands and swooped into the chaperone’s seat behind the driver, who looked in the mirror at his passengers and was much less sure.

The bus rumbled up the mountain, and gradually the seniors settled into small group conversations. Those nearest Beth and Euan apparently decided to table discussion of what to do about them in the presence of two adults, however disinterested those adults might be, and chose to merely ostracize them for the present. Once this seemed settled, Euan slumped down in the seat and turned to Beth with a raised eyebrow. With a sigh, she explained. My mom’s an on again, off again drunk who gets her numerous ‘boyfriends’ to buy her booze in exchange for… well. I never knew my dad, can only roughly guess who my sister’s father is, but I’ve been the one to raise her since she was born when I was eight. We live in a trailer near the gorge downhill from the village. Not such a nice story, so I really hope yours is better, she concluded with a wry smile.

He blinked. Um, yeah. I’ve lived all my life up the mountain, my parents were my teachers. Worked the trap lines with my dad since I was five or so, Mom taught us fishing, smoking, canning, as well as the three r’s. Mom’s something of a history buff as well so she’d teach us while we fished. Dad taught physics, algebra, music and geometry. My mom’s dad lives in town so for this school year I’m staying with him while I test the waters in regular society. Mom and Dad wanted me to at least know what I’m missing if I choose their way of life. He glanced up the length of the school bus. Gotta say, I’m not all that impressed.

Beth chuckled ruefully. Me neither, and I grew up with it! Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be able to take my sister and just disappear into the woods, but I know I just don’t have the skills.

Everybody’s skilled at something. Sounds like you’ve got the makings of a pretty good mom, starting so young with your sister. What else do you like to do?

Beth checked to make sure the other riders were still ignoring them before answering, and she lowered her voice. I knew a long time ago that my mom was never going to be able to teach me the kinds of things other moms teach their daughters, especially the sorts of things I’m interested in learning.

Like what?

Oh, all the old domestic arts, but also hunting and such like you were talking about learning. I’ve taken all the home crafts classes our school offered, plus stuff most of the other girls wouldn’t be caught dead taking, like wood shop.

His eyebrows shot up. You took wood shop?

She grinned at the look on his face. For two years. His mouth fell open. I’ve also taught myself a lot, reading and watching internet videos. She frowned. A couple years ago things got really lean, so I studied up on how to set rabbit snares, and skin and cook them. I didn’t have a whole lot of success, but we ate more than we would have otherwise.

Huh. He looked away thoughtfully for a moment. Did you do anything with the skins?

I would have, but at the time I was thinking about putting something in our bellies. He nodded his understanding. I did look through some videos on it, and I have a rough idea how to make a rabbit fur hood, which I’d very much like to do for my sister. My problem really is space to work. Where, in a single-wide trailer home, do you set up a tanning and furrier’s workshop? Especially with an uncooperative parent.

I get that. I’ll have to introduce you to my granddad when we get home, he’d let you use the shed out back of his house in a heartbeat. I already am, so why not?

Oh, that would be so cool! I’d love to be able to sell some stuff, that’s good money.

So you know some sewing?

Mm-hmm. I’m better at hand sewing. I mean, I took classes at school, I know how to use the machine there, but without one at home there’s no way to practice.

Yeah.

I had to teach myself knitting by watching videos, no one offered that at school. The home skills teacher is really nice, she went to a secondhand shop down the mountain and came back with some needles and yarn to try out stitches with.

Huh, he said again. Euan looked at his traveling companion for a long moment. You’re a surprising person, Beth.

She laughed. I think ‘strange’ may be a little more accurate. Certainly it’s what everyone else on this bus would say.

He didn’t smile. Maybe so, but is that a bad thing? I mean, think what’s normal behavior for this bunch, he said, gesturing to the other students. Is that what you want to be?

Definitely not, she said. Believe me, I have learned to view strangeness as a compliment, for sure. I have absolutely no problem seeming odd to most of those around me. It may be a little lonely on occasion, but not one student at this school has demonstrated to me that he or she would be pleasant to spend time with.

Present company excepted? he joked.

Yes, she said firmly, and they shook on it.

The rest of the ride, two hours of narrow, winding mountain roads wending their way ever higher above sea level, the two new friends spent alternately talking and sitting in companionable silence. Some of the others fell asleep. Their destination finally drew into sight, a rough square mile of rolling meadow nestled among the peaks. The buses, pickups, and vans pulled into a graveled parking area, and slowly the stiff-legged passengers disembarked. Teachers and chaperones groaned and stretched with everyone else, until Mr. Thompson reappeared with his trusty bullhorn.

Okay, everybody gather up over here! Come on now, shake it off! Better loosen up or your hike today is going to be an absolute misery! Everybody off the buses? Chaperones all here? Excellent! Alright, take a look around. There are several trails that vary by difficulty and distance. As you can see, the restrooms are over there, make sure you go before heading out on the trail so you don’t get stuck trying to find suitable shrubbery. And by suitable, I mean having a distinct lack of such things as bears and poison ivy! Boy, that would end the fun pretty quickly, don’t you think? Only a few kids laughed, most were still rubbing, shaking, and jumping feeling back into their legs. You each, I know, have various science assignments to attend to as you hike. Please remember to take turns with your buddy while working, so that one of you is always on watch. Keep track of the chaperones and teachers accompanying your class, they are carrying comprehensive first aid kits and HAMM radios. I’ll also remind you once again that cell phones this far back of beyond are pretty much useless, because there are no towers. Stick together! You may now remove your weapons from their cases and load them, and you had all better know not to horse around.

Curious, Beth watched Euan unzip his canvas carry case. Inside was a lovely Remington with a large barrel. There was also a separate, smaller plastic case, from which he removed a scope. Practiced hands swiftly attached it to the rifle, then he loaded it and handed it, stock down, to Beth. She was surprised at its weight, but held it carefully while he rolled up the case and stuffed it into its own pocket on the side of his knapsack. Euan shrugged back into the shoulder straps, buckled them together across his chest, and took the gun back so Beth could don her own. Before she did, she opened the top to remove a pink sweater. You won’t want that pretty soon. Euan commented.

I know, but it was really warm in the bus and now I’m cold. She looked down the mountain as she put it on. There was no sign of home of course, but the clouds she’d seen earlier were far below them. Hope those stay where they are, she pointed to them.

He turned to look. Yeah, no kidding. Or you’ll prove me wrong about that cardigan. He turned his eyes toward the campground style restroom building and pulled a face. Yikes, what a line. I’m tempted to take my chances with the bears and poison ivy. With a sigh he took his heavy backpack off again. May as well stretch out, loosen up a bit while we wait. Beth agreed. Sitting down and spreading her feet, she slowly reached for each of them, then just as slowly bent over in the middle until her nose touched the grass. Then she bent each leg back in turn and stretched each arm over her head toward the straight leg, and followed that with slow twists of her waist with her legs crossed, each direction accompanied by a satisfying popping of vertebrae. Finished and feeling better, she looked at Euan to see if he was ready. He was watching her with an amused expression. Watch out, he answered her surprise. You’re showing up the squad. Jabbing a thumb over his shoulder, he indicated a knot of girls with hair all done up in identical pony tails, each wearing an athletic jacket in the school colors, all taking turns glaring daggers at the pair.

She snorted as she stood. Then they maybe shouldn’t have pulled me into the girls’ bathroom freshman year and threatened a beat down if I dared show up at tryouts. She didn’t see Euan’s shocked expression as she picked up her backpack by the top strap and headed for the shorter lines at the restrooms. He shook his head, picked up his things and followed her.

It was still several minutes before either of them could use the facilities, but waiting meant they arrived long after the bullies had left, so neither encountered trouble inside. Back out, they cast around for their class and spotted them in the middle distance, just starting to disappear up a trail and into the trees. Beth sighed. How much do you want to bet the supposed adults just asked if everyone was present, everyone answered yes, and got taken at their word? Euan didn’t bother to reply, and had to force himself not to shake his head again. It struck him at that moment that he had already been doing that a lot this morning, and he would no doubt do it again any number of times over the course of the day. He settled for exchanging an exasperated look with his partner, and they hurried off to catch up.

It took them almost a quarter hour to do so, and would have taken longer if the teacher, Mrs. Woolsey, hadn’t stopped or slowed periodically to lecture on various plants and animal tracks. When they did arrive at the back of the line, it was just in time to hear her announce that she hoped they’d all been listening carefully, because most of what she had said would be on the quiz next week. Several students just ahead of Beth and Euan, having heard them walk up, looked back at them long enough to smirk. Sucks to be you, Tyler Chatham, at the back of the group, whispered. His partner and girlfriend, Nadia Greene, giggled, as did both their best friends, Mason Hedgecombe and Angelica Collins. All four sped up again to leave Beth and Euan behind. He turned to her and mouthed, Seriously?! and all she could do was sigh and nod.

By this time Beth was indeed regretting putting on her sweater. Despite the crisp fall air in the higher elevations, they were moving at a good clip, and she’d already warmed considerably just dashing to catch up with the class. There was no opportunity to take it off and stow it, however. The adults stayed at the front of the group, trusting the senior class to be old enough to keep up on their own. Far at the back, Beth and Euan were subjected to mysteriously dislodged rocks and pine cones, branches held and allowed to spring back at them, and increasingly bold comments about the possibilities of this relationship. Having endured three years of snide remarks and being shunned, Beth had thought she was inured to it, but as the speculation degenerated into absolute crudity, she had to clench her fists around her backpack straps, and her jaw to keep the tears at bay. Her ears absolutely burned. Euan was nearly as miserable. He thought desperately, trying to figure out what to do, but kept coming up blank. His distress increased with Beth’s as he watched her. Higher and higher they climbed, sometimes able to hear the teacher, sometimes not. Euan tried to keep a lookout for dangerous wildlife along with keeping an eye on Beth, but it was getting harder and harder. Finally he gave it up as a bad job, figuring the class was making enough noise to scare off all but the most determined bear, and focused mainly on trying to whisper encouragement. It crossed his mind to tell his grandfather as soon as they returned that the experiment was over, he was going back to trapping, but it certainly looked like he was destined to be Beth’s one and only friend. Would things be worse for her if he stayed, or if he disappeared? He just didn’t know, and the dilemma was almost overwhelming.

At long last, the trail leveled off for a little way, and everyone heard the sound of rushing water. A moment later they came upon a flat place above a small gorge with a fast-moving river just below them. Across the gorge was a narrow, rope-and-plank bridge that looked like it had been there awhile. I know what it looks like, Mrs. Woolsey called out. Her athletic frame appeared above the crowd as she hopped up onto a rock. I promise you, it’s not that bad. It does wobble though, and given its age we’re going to do this with a bit of caution. It’s too narrow to go all at once anyway, so everybody line up. With me, Alexa? Mrs. Collins smiled at her friend and the two set off across the rickety bridge.

Beth and Euan didn’t bother to join the line. Pulling her back under the trees, he offered her his canteen. She took a sip, but had trouble swallowing it. Her stomach churned. Good God, Beth. I wish there was something I could do. I’ve been racking my brain since we started and I can’t think how to make it stop.

She gave him a weary smile and handed back the canteen. You don’t know what it means that you just want to, she told him. Then there was no more time. The other students were laughing and joking as they crossed the bridge, trying to make it wobble to scare each other. Angelica hung back, tugging her boyfriend’s sleeve. When Mason looked at her she tossed her head back with a cruel smile. Mason turned to look at their favorite victims, then returned it. With hasty whispers to Tyler and Nadia, the four dawdled across, waiting for Beth and Euan to start crossing. As soon as they’d come too far to easily turn back, all of them started swinging the bridge. To their delight, Beth shrieked and grabbed the rope handrails, with Euan right behind her trying to hold on without dropping his rifle into the water. The strap hung precariously off his elbow as it bounced at his side. Giggling, Nadia rushed forward to get off the bridge, while the other three kept time with each other trying to make it sway ever wider. Go! Go! Tyler told his friends, and they walked forward in lockstep, still swinging the bridge. Beth was openly sobbing in terror, and Euan roared furiously for them to knock it off.

Knock it off? Okay then! Tyler laughed as he got to the end of the bridge. Taking his travel hatchet out of its strap on his backpack, he swung the hammer end at the wooden stakes holding the guy ropes. Beth screamed as the whole bridge shuddered.

Far up the trail, since no one had stopped after crossing the gorge, the two women finally heard the screaming over their own conversation. Turning around, they watched in horror as first one guy rope, then the other, broke loose. As they ran back, they could just see two of their charges lying flat on the remnants of the bridge, clinging desperately to the planks. The pranksters, having realized the enormity of what they’d done, grabbed for the wildly swinging ropes, but couldn’t catch them. Throwing himself to the ground, Mason tried holding on to the last board, but the weary support ropes, wet with spray, gave suddenly, the weight ripping it from his hands just before he was dragged off the edge, and the class watched helplessly as Beth and Euan clung to the dangling bridge while being blasted with the icy water rushing down from the peaks. Again and again they tried to pull themselves up the boards like a ladder on the other side, but the force of the river was so strong and the water so cold they couldn’t keep a grip. Finally the class could only wail as first Beth’s fingers gave way, and then as Euan tried to hold onto her backpack the added weight snapped the board he was clinging to, and both disappeared.

Chapter 2

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Mason lay flat still, unable to rise, unable to believe what had just happened. Angelica screamed for her mother, Nadia sobbed, and Tyler stared downstream, stunned, hatchet slipping from his hand. He jumped when it hit his foot, shying away from it. Their classmates stood around them, only vaguely aware of Mrs. Woolsey dashing downstream, trying to get a glimpse of the two lost ones, only to be stopped a hundred feet down by a tangle of evergreens clinging to the bank and leaning over it. Trying to go around the other way, she found the copse too big. By the time she’d find the river again, her students would be miles away, crushed on the rocks or drowned. She stood and stared at the trees for a long moment, not seeing them, then turned back uphill.

The class stood where she had left them, completely unable to think what to do next. Alexa Collins held her daughter, trying to comfort her but having no idea what to say. All but the five clustered at the edge stared at Mrs. Woolsey, silently begging her to tell them how this could be fixed. She stared back for a moment, then ordered everyone to sit down. Without a word, they obeyed. It was something they could do. With shaking hands, she took off her backpack and fumbled through it. Under snacks and first aid gear she finally found the two-way radio and turned it on. Thumbing the send button she tremulously asked if anyone was in range. Static answered. She checked the station number, and it was the one agreed upon in the staff meetings. She tried again. Static. Swallowing her panic, she changed the channel again and again, hoping to find a hunter or ranger. Nothing. The radio dropped from nerveless fingers.

Scrambling it up again, she stumbled to her feet. A-a-alright e-everyone, on y-y-your feet. W-w-we have to get to the buses right away.

How? She didn’t see who asked. Everyone turned toward what was left of the bridge, which was banging loudly against the other side of the river gorge.

You flaming idiot, a small, bespectacled girl said to Tyler. He looked at her in shock, but next moment another boy’s fist landed squarely on Tyler’s jaw and he went down hard. The class all stepped toward the four at the edge and Angelica’s mother.

Enough! Mrs. Woolsey bellowed. Here was something she understood. Enough! she said again. That is absolutely enough. Everyone gather your things and get in line. We’re going farther up the trail, there’s another bridge we were always going to take on the way back, the trail makes a big loop and returns to the parking area.

What about B-Beth and the new boy? the girl with glasses asked.

I don’t know, Rena, but since I can’t reach anyone on the radio this is all we can do. We have to get back as fast as we can and alert the authorities.

Everybody gasped. What?! Alexa Collins shrieked. This is your priority, Sara? Having these kids arrested?! Angelica howled louder in misery for what might happen to her.

What? No! I meant the DNR, the Ranger service! Search and rescue! Mrs. Woolsey stared at her friend, hardly recognizing her. Unable to believe her ears, she could do nothing but turn up the trail and set a brisk pace. This time, she stopped periodically and looked behind her, counting heads and making sure everyone was staying together. Guilty tears streamed down her face as she walked, only just coming to realize how much she had shirked that duty before, spending as much time as she could just visiting with the one person there her own age. She dreaded getting home and telling her husband what she’d failed to do, not because he’d blame her, but because she blamed herself. The idea of hearing herself recite out loud what had happened terrified her. It would make it all too real.

All down the line of students, no one spoke. Not a sound was heard but footsteps and muffled sobs from a few of the girls. It had been so much fun to have a scapegoat in class, someone they could always use to feel better about themselves by simply comparing such a girl to their own superiority. Now the magnitude of treating someone like that, then watching her fall to her death, hit home for a significant number of students. Most of them couldn’t help but think of any number of ways they could have been nicer. Even if they didn’t befriend her, they could have stood up for her. The worst of these sufferers was Neil Wood, the son of the sheriff. He shook out his hand, knuckles bleeding and sore from cracking into Tyler’s teeth, and knew his father would expect an explanation. Rena snuffled, wishing she’d had the courage to be friends with Beth, but being short, stocky, and somewhat of a nerd, it was just easier to let the kids have someone else to pick on, and she’d been afraid to make herself a target.

At the back of the line, Mason, Tyler, Angelica, and Nadia staggered along. They knew Mrs. Woolsey really did mean that Beth and Euan should be found, dead or alive, if at all possible. The thought had been planted though, that they were very culpable in the deaths, and each step was taken with the knowledge that it took them closer to facing the consequences of their actions. The two boys strode in silence, wondering what it would be like to be arrested. Tyler absently touched his mouth and spat blood, while Mason stared at his skinned fingers and knew things would be bad when he got home. Nadia shivered uncontrollably, petrified at the idea of facing the police. Angelica whimpered, incoherent, only putting one foot in front of the other because her mother was steering her along. Gradually Alexa’s murmured reassurances included references to their attorney, and how he would make sure no one blamed her for anything that happened. And so, Angelica’s cries quieted. She dreaded the consequences of being blamed more than she regretted the loss of two people she hadn’t cared for at all.

Euan didn’t know if Beth was still near him, didn’t know if he still had his gun, didn’t know when it would be safe to take another breath. He knew he had his backpack, because it was dragging at his shoulders, and his struggle seemed to be divided equally between getting another breath and keeping his pack from pulling him to the bottom. The rapids seemed never-ending, just bouncing painfully off one rock and the next, scrabbling madly around for anything to grab. At last the back of his hand connected solidly with something that yielded and didn’t feel like rock, and he grabbed at it. Immediately hands grasped his wrist tightly and he let go his handful of Beth’s hair to grab her wrist in return. After that they were separated a few times as they collided with rocks, but continually managed to catch sight of each other again and regain their hold.

Every chance he could, Euan looked wildly around for something, anything, to grab a hold of and stop the wild careening down the mountain. The river swooped left and right, only seeming to gain speed each time. The water roared in his ears, nearly muffling his and Beth’s cries of fear, and pain as they collided with rocks and each other. His fingers felt numb with cold, so when he lost his grip on her hand again, he flailed and caught the strap of her backpack. By degrees he stuffed his hand through it as he could, until his entire forearm was wedged against her ribcage. She clung to his shoulders, trying to keep her head back so she wouldn’t bang it against his. She was above him now, so he could help hold her head out of the water. He went down often enough to terrify him, but each time was able to kick back to the surface.

Euan thought he was imagining that the water roared louder, but found he was mistaken when they plunged through deep rapids. With his free hand he desperately scrabbled against the rocks, hoping for a handhold, but the water tore his hand away from the stones it had worn smooth. They were swept around huge boulders, backpacks and bodies ricocheting off the monoliths and each other. When at last they passed through the rocks, the river flowed more smoothly but just as fast. The banks were high and steep, and rushed by too quickly to reach.

At last the river plunged over a short but deep cataract, so they each had time to gasp a quick breath before plummeting down below the surface. Here the river widened and deepened, just as swift and just as cold, but it was easier to fight their way upward and breathe. Euan caught a glimpse of Beth’s face; her lips were blue. He scanned the banks on both sides, but they were still in a narrow canyon with steep sides. In the back of his mind Euan knew that during spring melt the water would be higher up the banks, but now in the autumn it was too low to carry them to the top. Onward they rushed, searching and searching for something, anything, to grab hold of. They saw a pine tree that had fallen across the water, and both snatched at the branches and got handfuls of needles. Another appeared ahead, and again they lunged, and this time each caught a branch. Euan’s broke, and Beth found her icy fingers had no strength left. She sobbed as they were swept away from the tree.

The river swooped to the right, then the left, and around that bend they saw a rocky beach on the right before the river veered the opposite way again. Kicking with all they had left in them, they reached the shallows. Gasping and shivering they dragged themselves up onto the sandbar and crawled up out of the water. The beach stretched up into a grassy clearing, and Beth made it nearly to the green before she collapsed.

Euan sprawled beside her. His arms and legs felt like cold, overcooked pasta. He had no strength left to do anything but take deep, gulping breaths of chill mountain air. He coughed and gagged, turning his head to vomit river water onto the stones. He could hear Beth nearby, shivering so hard on the smooth gravel that he could hear the rocks clattering underneath her. She sobbed weakly. He looked at her, lying on her side, water flowing from her clothes and hair. Her skin was white, lips and ears blue. Her eyes were closed, and gradually he realized that she was falling asleep.

Somewhat galvanized by this, Euan crawled up beside her and nudged her arm. No, he gasped. No, you can’t. We can’t. We have to move. If we stop… we’ll die. Beth moaned, and he watched her anxiously for signs of concussion, but slowly she returned to all fours and followed him.

Euan checked that she still had her bag. D-do you have a ch-change of clothes? he asked her, though he was shivering so hard it felt like full body shudders.

Beth was having difficulty getting her mind to work. It took her a long moment to figure out that he was speaking, another to decipher what his words meant, and then she had to think long and hard to remember what she’d packed. At last she nodded. G-g-good. We’ll find a b-bush and I’ll stand watch for bears while you ch-change, then y-you can do the same for me.

W-what?

We’re t-too close to the w-water, and th-this place is flat. L-lots of animals will come to drink. We have to g-get out of our w-wet things and get the heck out of h-here.

She didn’t think anything could spur her enough to move faster, but this did. Everything hurt. It hurt to move. She couldn’t even tell how bruised she was from the boulders in the river, because every part of her was so achingly cold. Having miraculously avoided drowning however, she did not want to be a bear’s popsicle, so she closed her eyes, gritted her sore jaw, and struggled to her feet.

Euan put his hand under her elbow and tried to help, but he was hurting in every muscle himself. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so weak. He’d had the flu a couple times as a child, but hadn’t been sick since reaching his full height. It was a feeling he did not like one bit. He tried to pull out his hatchet from its carry strap, but didn’t have enough sensation in his fingers to grasp it. He tried to stomp his feet to get the circulation going, but couldn’t lift them high enough; he could only shuffle. Groaning in frustration he cast his gaze at the trees ringing the small clearing, and he couldn’t see any movement that might have been an animal. Angrily he thought if a bear came there wouldn’t be a blessed thing that he could do about it, and the idea of dying himself didn’t bother him nearly as much as the idea of being helpless to protect Beth.

It seemed to take forever to get to the trees, and Euan wouldn’t let Beth go into the bushes until he had gone all the way around the nearby trees. She stood and shook in the wan fall sunlight, mightily resenting the light breeze. The moment he reappeared and said no bears, she fumbled through some sumac under the oaks and elms, shrugging out of her pack straps as she went. It was hard to peel off her wet things, and the ones she’d pulled out to put on were damp in places where her pack had leaked, but she felt a great deal better when she’d changed, apart from her wet hair. She wound up her braid and tucked in the end to get it off her back. An empty plastic grocery sack acquired her wet clothes and she stuffed it down into her pack before fighting her way out of the sumac. She found Euan standing over his much larger bag, hatchet in one hand, roll of clothes in the other, scanning their surroundings constantly. When she arrived at his side he handed her the hatchet and silently took the path she’d made. Beth looked around, and to her surprise saw his rifle resting across his pack, though the scope was gone. She called over her shoulder, I’m amazed you m-managed to hold onto your g-gun.

I didn’t, really, he replied, voice muffled through the shirt he was trying to remove. It was on the arm that I had through your strap, so it was trapped between us.

Whew! That’s lucky, she called back.

Hand of God, more like. Not that it’s much good to us ’til it dries out.

Beth didn’t argue. For all she knew he was right. She tried scanning the trees like he had, but felt so shivery and weak it didn’t seem likely she’d be able to even scare off a bear or wolf, so she gave up and started looking for dead wood. Under the deciduous trees it was present in abundance, so she started hacking at the smaller stuff, getting it to lengths she could carry. Euan burst out of the sumac faster than she would have dreamed possible. What are you doing?! he demanded. You’re supposed to be watching out for bears!

Too tired to yell back, she said wearily, I can’t do anything about a bear if one does show up. So I’m watching out for firewood. Your lips are still blue, pretty sure mine are as well.

Oh. He sighed. Yeah, okay. You’re right, that’s just as important. Maybe m-more, because they’ll stay away from a fire if we can get it big enough.

Awesome. That means we can build it right on the beach, because I’m in the mood for quite a b-big fire. Euan turned to gathering up a few pine branches for quick heat, while Beth gathered up what she’d chopped. Returning to the beach was harder than it would have been, because their arms didn’t have the strength and their hands lacked the dexterity to carry both wood and backpacks, so they had to make a return trip. On the rocks Beth fumbled through the outside pockets of her pack and quickly produced a plastic freezer bag containing a mint tin that now held big kitchen matches she’d dipped in melted wax. Euan raised an eyebrow at the green matches, but was wearily glad for their size and number. He got some tinder ready, and she scraped some of the wax off the end of the match so she could strike it on a pine log. The abrupt scent of evergreen was strong enough to make him sniff and glance at the log. Watching him, Beth smiled crookedly. Christmas candle, she explained. He blinked, but found he had no energy to laugh.

Working together, they had a good fire going in short order, but it was awhile before it was really hot enough to warm them through. Both propped their wet hiking boots as close to it as they dared, but there was no way they’d dry completely before they’d have to move on. For a long time, the two of them just huddled close to the flames, nearly on top of them. Euan thought he’d never stop shivering, and hated every minute feeling so clumsy and stupid. Why’s the water so cold? Beth complained.

Glacial run-off, Euan muttered resentfully. We’re not much south of the national park, and just past that is Canada, so what with being so high up and this far north, it’s glaciers. Beth shivered.

When she could move her fingers a little more, Beth stowed her matches, and watching her Euan asked, what else did you pack? I mean, how are you set for food and such?

Beth’s head hurt. She honestly couldn’t make her brain remember, so she started digging. She moved slowly, every muscle on fire with pain, but feeling frozen still. Starting at the outside pockets, she began emptying and taking stock. Pocket knife. Bigger folding knife. Leaf bag. Tea. She looked at it in her hand for a long moment, trying to figure out why that was good. Then it clicked. Tea! she gasped, holding up a sandwich bag with several different individually wrapped tea bags.

Oh, yeah! Euan dug in his own pack and found a small collapsible pan, then crawled painfully to the river to fill it. In moments, it was sitting on a couple of logs right in the fire. While they waited for it to warm, Euan took a turn doing inventory. Every object his hand touched he had to take a moment to remember what it was for. Knife. Paracord. Multitool. Matches. Oh good, we’ve got lots. Compass. Head lamp. Batteries. Toothbrush and paste. Wet wipes. Where in the world did I stow my food?! He felt queasy, sitting up didn’t help, and the effort of digging through his bag when he wanted to lie down and sleep forever was irritating. Small tarp, fishing kit, first aid, ugh! Finally! He’d progressed to the larger compartments by this time, and under his bag of wet clothes he found several packets of dried mixed vegetables. He also had some jerky and loose granola.

Seeing this, Beth opened her own supplies again and found a sealed plastic box that she opened and held out to him. My home-made granola bars, with dried fruit, nuts, peanut butter powder, oats and flax seed. All pressed together with wild honey I found myself last year looking for a new fishing spot. Her hand shook, the bars jumping in the box. He sighed with relief and took one. Everything but the honey and berries I had to trade for, but I did find a really good new spot to fish and caught enough salmon and trout to even pay the light bill. Plus I did some mowing and mending, so last summer was pretty good, really. Especially since my mother never found out how much cash actually flowed through my hands, so she couldn’t drink it. Beth spoke with an effort, but talking about anything helped her stay awake, and relating the events helped her remember them.

Mouth full, he toasted her with the granola bar. He had to swallow hard to get the bite he’d taken down his throat, and before stuffing the rest into his mouth he said, These are really good. Softer than I expected.

Yeah, I’m not keen on crunchy granola. I like it moist and chewy, it’s easier to eat when you’re tired. He nodded emphatically, if weakly, and she leaned forward to critically analyze his face. Your lips and ears are getting their color back.

Yours too, he replied, and dragged a couple of the larger reserved logs into the fire while she picked out a couple of cinnamon tea bags and tossed them in the pot. Each found a tin mug in their bags, and when the tea was steeped she brought out another surprise. Another plastic container was presented, and she pulled back the lid and held it out. Euan couldn’t figure out what was in it. He puzzled over the thin yellow rectangles, separated by bits of waxed paper. Stumped, he asked, What on earth are those?

Crystalized honey. She peeled a couple off and plunked them into their mugs. He smiled gratefully and poured tea over the honey. Folding sporks came out of both bags, and both savored the heat on their hands and going down their throats. The cinnamon was wonderfully warming.

All too soon it was gone, and with a huge effort Euan stood and looked around. We’d better go, he said.

Shouldn’t we stay close, so we won’t be as hard to find?

Close, yeah, but far enough away from the river to avoid traffic, if you know what I mean. We’ll go uphill a bit and find a place to make camp and finish warming up.

Make camp? But it’s only… oh crud. Beth looked with dismay at her waterlogged watch. The package did say it was only water resistant, not waterproof. She glanced up at the sky, but the sun had disappeared.

Euan looked up too. Clouding over, he noted. Plus we seem to be in a sort of canyon, so the sun won’t touch this place for long anyway. He held out a hand to help her up. Yeah, I know it’s probably not even noon yet, but we want someplace we can be halfway decently comfortable, before, as you say, sitting still so we can be found. I want to be as tight as possible so we can get truly warm and get some rest.

Warm and rest sound really great right about now. She swished the dishes in the shallows, shook most of the water off, and stowed them. Euan picked up his useless rifle. Can you save that? she asked.

I sure hope so. We need to hunker down long enough that I can take it apart, clean it and air it. Do you have more plastic bags? We’re going to have to wrap our feet before we put our boots back on.

She thought. Thinking was still harder than it should have been, but then she remembered the leaf bag and dug it out. We could cut this up, she said doubtfully.

That’s good. Really good. It wasn’t comfortable, but more so than soggy socks would have been. Striding around the woods on uncertain terrain with wet feet was downright dangerous.

Beth had to really work to make her fingers cooperate enough to tie her wet laces, but got it done eventually. I’m ready. No, wait. She dug her rain jacket out of her bag and put it on. It wasn’t especially warm, but it was another layer, and her sweater of course was soaked.

Euan thought his pack felt heavier than before. His wet clothes and the water it had taken on shouldn’t add that much weight, he realized, which meant he was still dangerously weak. His feet felt like nails dug into the soles with every step. He refrained from mentioning this to Beth, however, and the two cautiously approached the woods. There was a game trail leading up from the water, and neither liked to use it because predators would as well, but they simply didn’t have the strength to push through the brush. At the first tree, Euan dug his big clasp knife out of his pocket where he’d put it rather than put it back out of reach in his bag. With a few quick cuts he’d carved their initials in the bark, and Beth wearily teased, I like you too, Euan, but we did just meet this morning. Don’t you think it’s rather soon?

He blushed. I’m not, I mean, this is just, I like, I… She chuckled and he hastily slashed an arrow showing the direction they intended to take.

There you go! Good idea! Did your dad show you that trick?

Yeah. He still couldn’t turn and look at her, and she giggled.

The game trail wound up and around boulders and trees. The slope was steeper than either liked, but it seemed pretty clear. After a while Euan slowed and frowned. What’s wrong? Beth whispered. Bear?

He looked at the trail at his feet. No. Look at this.

She squatted beside him, wincing at the pressure on her toes and the pain of bending her knees. She held a nearby trunk for balance. What am I looking at?

He pointed up the trail. Look at the surface of the path. I see some animal prints, but the whole thing is comfortably wide, and the dirt is really tightly packed and mostly bare, without much plant life growing through it. And look there. He pointed higher. No tree branches growing over the path below my head height. He looked at her. There’s only one creature that tends to a path that carefully, or uses the same trail often enough to wear it down like this.

She gasped. People!

Yes. He smiled, helped her to her feet, and they tried to move faster. Sometimes it was a steep climb, but in those places logs were placed strategically across, so that they almost looked like random tree roots, but spaced just a little too conveniently and forming irregular stair steps. The pair stumbled on. Soon they were panting from the exercise, too soon after the river, but neither was willing to slow down. People meant help, maybe even a radio.

The path continued long beyond what they cared for. Of necessity they stopped to rest, pale and shaking. Euan braced himself against a tree trunk, and Beth plunked down in the middle of the path. Panting, she said, I wonder how much elevation we’ve gained since we left the fire.

More… more than we’re quite ready for, he gasped. She could only nod. Water? She nodded again, but when he reached for his canteen it was nearly empty. He stared at it in disbelief.

Oh man. The bottom. She pointed to what she could see from sitting on the ground. He turned over the canteen and saw a dent so deep the two layers of