As Time Goes On

By Orion Holder

It wasn't until Suzanna' mother was on her death'bed that she told her she was adopted. After her mothers' death, her father hired Emma Lou to keep house. A few years later Emma Lou and her father were married. This was the happiest day of Suzannas' life.
Emma Lou took her to church for the first time in her life. It wasn't long before Suzanna joined the church. It wasn't long before Suzanna gave her heart to God and her life changed from that day until now. Her best friend Janet also started going to church

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 18, 2019
• ISBN: 9781796078961

Orion Holder

Orion is a native of Henry County, Georgia. She lives on the property where she grew up. Her dream to be a writer started at the age of ten. At that time her favorite author was Louisa Mae Alcott. Needless to say, she's always been an avid reader. She has one daughter, two living grandsons, and one great, granddaughter.

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

Bill and I are on our way home from the airport. He’s been on a job in Jacksonville, Florida for the last two weeks. I feel bad having to bring up a problem every time he gets home from a trip. When we adopted Alice, I would have bet my life that we would never have behavior problems with her. Alice hasn’t been the same since her Grandmother, Emma Lou died. And, too, she is a teenager now and I can still remember how confusing that can be with all the hormones raging.

Bill, I’m sorry that lately I have only problems to discuss with you when you come home. We need to decide how we are going to handle this problem with Alice. If Emma Lou was still with us, she would know what to do. I don’t feel qualified for parenthood.

Now, Suzanna, don’t start blaming yourself. You have been a loving mother to Alice. She’s a teenager now, and you know yourself those teen years can be difficult. Maybe we should think about family counseling.

That is a reasonable idea, Bill, but with all the traveling in your job, it will be difficult for you to be present at all the meetings.

That’s true, honey, but we will have to cross that bridge when we get there. Hopefully things won’t get that involved.

Okay, I’ll call Dr. Browne tomorrow and ask him to recommend a counselor.

I was awake when Alice arrived home. I hadn’t been able to sleep while she was out with Ned. For some unknown reason I can’t find it in my heart to trust Ned. I don’t know anything about his parents or where they live. I would like to meet Mrs. Harvey but don’t see a chance of that happening. Alice is only sixteen. I don’t know Ned’s age, but I am most sure he is a few years older than she is. This brings back some bad memories in my life. God forbid the same thing happening to my beloved Alice. I know first hand how smooth a line an older guy can have. And how romantic it can be to a young inexperienced girl.

Alice hasn’t been the same since Ned came into her life. Her personality has changed drastically. It seems that I am trying to communicate with a complete stranger. Sure it was devastating for Alice when her grandmother, Emma Lou, died; but I have done my best to be a good mother. However, I haven’t been as strict on her as Emma Lou was. Maybe that is where I am failing as a mother. Maybe my first mistake was trying to be a perfect mother.

I will call Janet. I need my friend’s advice, after all, Janet has been dealing with Jane and her problems for quite awhile. I am ashamed that I have let Janet down in our friendship because of her problems with Jane. It is selfish of me to try to keep Alice away from Jane, but I am afraid Jane might be a bad influence on her. The phone rang several times and I was about to hang up when Janet answered.

Hello. Janet answered panting as if she had been running.

Hi, Janet, this is Suzanna. I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve called, but you know how time gets away. How is everything going with you and yours?

Suzanna! I can’t remember how long it’s been since we’ve had a chance to get together for a good long chat. Things are hectic as usual how about at your place? If I had known how difficult it was going to be to raise kids I would not have had even one. You don’t know how lucky you are to be barren.

I know my answer is going to shock you, Janet, but I am beginning to realize how true that statement is. Let’s get together for lunch and have a pity party, what do you say?

Why that sounds great, when and where would you like to meet, my friend?

Well, I can’t think of a better place than your kitchen table. That is, if it is okay with you. I can pick up a sub sandwich on my way over, how does that sound?

Good thinking, I’ll make some iced tea and I have some chocolate chip cookies for our waistlines.

Okay, girl, I’ll be over around one o’clock if that’s okay with you.

Sure, I’m looking forward to our visit.

As I hang up the phone I feel shame. I never get in contact with Janet except when I have a problem. It seems as time goes by we never get together to simply enjoy each mother’s company the way we did when we were younger. Having teenagers is a full time job.

I wish I had half the knowledge for raising children that dear Emma Lou had. I miss her so much. I wish I had paid more attention to how she handled Alice. Alice loved and respected her and never seemed to disagree with her the way she does with me. I guess it could have changed even with Emma Lou though, now that Alice is a teenager, and seems to think she knows everything.

Janet answers the door and I follow her to the kitchen. She pours the tea as I open the sandwich wrapper. When we are seated at the table I realize I have forgotten to get chips.

Guess what I forgot, Janet?

I don’t miss anything. My gosh that’s a huge sandwich.

I forgot to get chips. Remember how we use to think sandwiches were not complete without chips.

Take a look at these broad hips of mine: and you will realize you did me a favor by forgetting the chips, laughed Janet.

We sit eating in silence. I think to myself that silence wasn’t a part of our relationship when we were younger. It’s almost as if we were never friends much less best friends. It’s sad how time changes the things that are dearest to ones heart. I suppose that’s where the saying that time changes everything comes from. Janet looks over at me and says: Suzanna please don’t tell me you are having trouble with Alice."

You hit the nail on the head. I’m at my ropes end with her. All of a sudden she seems to think she knows more than I do about everything.

Why Alice has always been such a good child. What do you think caused her to change so much so quickly?

It actually hasn’t been all that quickly. It all began right after our dear Emma Lou left this earth. It’s almost as if Alice feels her life ended too. You know how much she loved her grandmother.

It’s true, Alice loved Emma Lou with all her heart, but I don’t think that could be her problem right now. You surely remember how mixed-up you and I felt when we were teenagers. You do remember don’t you? Why it’s a good thing I was in an all girl school at sixteen. I have to admit now that Aunt Missy knew what she was doing to send me away to school. I don’t doubt for a minute that I might have ended up having to get married if she hadn’t been so wise. Why I was boy crazy. Alice loves you and Bill as much as she loved Emma Lou. What kind of problems are you having with her?

When I try to reason with her she stares into space as though I’m not even talking. She is not the same happy little girl that she once was, and she hardly ever smiles. Her whole personality has changed. I simply don’t know how to approach her anymore.

I don’t know what advice to give you. It doesn’t sound like you could possibly be talking about the Alice I know.

That’s how I feel, too, but I think you might be right, it could be hormones. Actually it all got worse when she had her sixteenth birthday. She was so excited, because I told her she could start dating when she turned sixteen. The next thing I knew she was telling me all about this boy, Ned, in her biology class. She went on and on about how handsome he was, and that she had a feeling he would ask her to go out with him. She was right. Two weeks after her birthday she came in from school all bubbly and happy, telling me Ned had asked her to go to the movies. That was three months ago and they have been going strong ever since. I was hoping it was only a teenage crush. Now I’m afraid it could be more serious than that.

Oh, I think you are taking this whole thing too seriously. Now if we were talking about my Jane, we might have something to be concerned about; but Alice is nothing like Jane. She thinks about the consequences before she acts. She also has a sense of right and wrong.

Wait a minute, Janet, you are not being fair to Jane. You know Jane knows right from wrong. Why you take her and Annie to church every Sunday. What do you think they teach in Sunday School if not right from wrong?

You know Jane as well as I do; therefore, you also know Jane decides for herself what is right for her. All I can tell you, Suzanna, is I’m glad you are not responsible for a child like my Jane. If you were I don’t think you could survive it. I personally think you are overreacting to this whole situation.

I hope you are right, but I remember once when Emma Lou and I were talking about what a good little girl Alice was, that Emma Lou reminded me about Alice’s mother. Emma Lou said she could see some of Lou Ann’s stubbornness in Alice, and that I might one day have to get stern with her. Janet I’m not sure I could do that. I hope adopting Alice was not a big mistake on our part.

You have to face reality, Suzanna. You and I know that life is never perfect. You and Bill are good parents and Alice loves you both. Together you will find a way to reason with her. Never ever think that adopting her was a mistake. It was an answer to dear Emma Lou’s prayers. Why if you and Bill hadn’t taken Alice to be your own, Emma Lou would have left this earth worrying about what might happen to her.

I suppose you are right, but that doesn’t solve my problem. You can’t begin to know how much I depended on Emma Lou to help me when problems arose in Alice’s behavior. I simply was not put on this earth to be a parent. I love children but I have no idea how to be the mother Alice deserves. Admit it, Janet, you know this is true.

Okay let’s say this is true; if so, it’s too late in the game, wouldn’t you say to turn your back on Alice? After all it wasn’t Alice’s idea for you to adopt her.

Janet, you know I’m not going to give up on Alice. I love her and I would never even think about giving her up. All I need is input from you on how to approach her.

Well for starters you have to be firm with her, that’s what Emma Lou would advise you to do. She is not capable of making her own decisions about her future at this age. You are going to have to become her disciplinarian to guide her in what’s best for her. She’s not as strong willed as my Jane, therefore I believe she will listen to you.

I walk around the table. Janet rises to meet me with arms open wide. We embrace and I thank her for being patient with me as we walk to the door. Just as Janet opens the door, Annie and Jane are coming up the front steps.

Hey, Suzanna, said Jane as she gives me a big hug. Then she looks around me then back and asked, where is Alice?

I don’t know, Jane? She said she was going to meet you and Annie at the mall.

No ma’am, we haven’t seen her, Jane turns to Annie and says isn’t ain’t that right, Annie?

Annie looks down at her feet and nods her head yes. Annie’s actions says more than words. It was then I knew Jane wasn’t telling the truth, but why would she lie about it? Then Janet enters the conversation.

Look at me, Jane, Janet places her hand beneath Jame’s chin, tilting her head back to make eye contact. Now Jane tell me why you are covering for Alice. I want the truth right now. I said the truth. I don’t want to have to ask Annie, do you understand?

Yes, Mama. Alice didn’t want Suzanna to know she was meeting Ned at the mall. That’s why she told her she was gonna meet Annie and me. Alice told me Suzanna doesn’t like Ned. She said no matter what Suzanna thinks about Ned, she is going to see him every chance she gets. She said there is no reason for Suzanna not to like him. She said when she gets out of school she is going to marry Ned.

Janet and I make eye contact and I begin my questions. "Jane, did you and Annie drop Alice off at my house?

No ma’am, Alice said Ned would take her home. I think they wanted to see a movie or something.

I turn to Janet and tell her I will see her later. Janet followers me, knowing I need to speak to her privately. When we get outside I began to tear up. What am I to do, Janet? Bill is away as usual, and won’t be back home for another week. What if Alice doesn’t come home? You don’t think she will run away with Ned do you?

I don’t know, but I sure hope not: you be sure and call me if she doesn’t come home.

You better believe I will. I don’t know how I can call Bill with terrible news like this. Oh, Janet, please say a prayer for me. I don’t think I can handle such a problem as this without Bill.

Don’t cross any bridges before you have to, Suzanna. You know how easy it is for us to imagine the worse. Why Alice may be home right now wondering why you aren’t home. Don’t upset yourself this way my friend. Everything is going to be okay. You’ll see. Now drive carefully and stop worrying.

CHAPTER TWO

When I enter the kitchen Alice is making our evening meal. She greets me by asking where I have been. Momma, it’s getting late and I am hungry, so I decided to make our supper.

That’s wonderful, honey, what are you making?

One of your favorite meals, baked salmon, baked potato, and cole slaw. It won’t be long before it will be ready.

What can I do to help, honey?

Nothing. This is my treat for you, Momma. You sit down at the table and I’ll fix you a nice cold glass of iced tea.

My goodness, what have I done to deserve all this attention, dear?

"You are the best momma a girl could ever dream of having. But