The Dmv . . . Asleep at the Wheel: An Immigrant’S View of Scandalous Government Waste

By Mariam Noujaim

Everyone in the world knows DMV means poor service. Now you can get an inside look at what creates that culture of:

Its not my money, I dont care.

Mariam, The Mighty, immigrated to America leaving behind a culture of shortage and conservation vs the shock of abundance and waste. Her Mom did the unthinkable, she recycled matches. yes matches.

Stop the waste is the message from The Author. She describes a collection of hilarious situations where the DMV has spent money on things which are unnecessary or extravagant like a $60,000 crossing guard to help adult DMV Employees cross between 2 connected buildings! DMVs janitor vs the donkey cart in Egypt! DMV State of The Art Scanners and Egyptian Ancient Technology, what do they have in common?!! The Killer KeyboardThe Hall of MirrorsCommitting Hairy ChairyBumper ChairsTrash Talking...It is snowing at DMV Eatin Your Taxes! WHOS HUNGRY!!!! Best potlucks ever at the DMV!!! and more stories DMV doesnt want you to know.

The book will illustrate the problems while you laugh your . Off! This is a book of ALL TRUE stories which sheds light on the waste in a comical way.
Sometimes, it only takes a match in the dark to spark a revolution.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Oct 23, 2017
• ISBN: 9781524688912

Mariam Noujaim

Mariam Noujaim earned the nickname “The Mighty” by taking on injustice. Born in Egypt, and graduated from the American University in Cairo (AUC) in 1977. She came to the United States in 1979 and landed a job in California state government. In addition to working full time, and fighting the waste, she built a thirty-year real estate career and several other entrepreneurial businesses. Now retired from the DMV she presents this book both hilarious and enjoyable to read, while sincere in her hopes that state government can WAKE-UP!

Book preview

The DMV…

Asleep at the Wheel

An Immigrant’s View of Scandalous Government Waste

Mariam The Mighty Noujaim

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AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2017 Mariam Noujaim. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 10/20/2017

ISBN: 978-1-5246-8892-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5246-8890-5 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5246-8891-2 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2017909539

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

To my 93 year old mother for all her lessons

and

unconditional love.

To ‘Mighty Mom’

The first woman in Egypt to drive a ‘Citroen’/French Car.

She managed to load 13 kids in the car and drive us to the beach in Ismailia on the Suez Canal.

Something no women ever did in the 1960s, and even today,

no ONE still does.

Dad always believed that ‘Mado’ is the bravest woman he knew.

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Mom & Dad

CONTENTS

Preface

Introduction

1 The Fight

2 Cairo TrafficCaution Ahead!

3 The Saga of the Crossing Guard

4 Visions of America

5 Mouror:A Lesson in DMV Egypt

6 An Educated Woman

7 In the Driver’s Seat

8 The State Worker

9 The Big House

10 The Mog’aam’aa of California,Not in America

11 A DMV Diary:My Day to Day Journals

12 Going Digital

13 DMV Going Digital (Sorta)

14 The Saga of AB-60

15 The Black Hole

16 Why Government

17 Field Office: The Reality Show

18 A Donkey Cart at the DMVA Janitor’s Saga

19 Stop the Insanity!

20 DMV Confidential

21 My Letter to Governor Brown

22 Choose Your Union

23 A Call to Action

24 Free the WorkerTransparency and Choice

Final Thoughts

Author’s Bio

PREFACE

Have you ever been to a Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) office?!

My message to America:

Stop the Waste!

I am writing this book because I have witnessed waste day in and day out for decades, and I have dedicated much of my life to trying to stop it, and I continue to do so. I’ve collected stories from the DMV and the state of California on unnecessary or extravagant spending because as a state employee who has worked in many different departments, I feel compelled to let people know this is happening. These stories may be funny to some, but these are also very sad because California is pouring a lot of money down the drain and no one seems to care. One reason is what I call GWM, or government worker mentality (i.e., It’s not my money).

The book will illustrate the problems, and hopefully, you’ll also find it entertaining. We present solutions from the DMV worker, a voice often forgotten and suffocated.

I want to be very clear: these are my words, my opinions, and my experiences. I leave out specific names because the purpose is to find solutions, not to accuse anyone of any wrongdoing. I do not officially represent the DMV, but I am the DMV. I am a clerk, I have a voice. It’s my intention in writing this book for our department to no longer be a joke but to be a leader in transforming from a wasteful culture to one that respects the people we serve. It may seem like an impossible dream, but I dream big. And this is America’aa where all things are possible!

There’s no one person to blame for the GWM mentality; it’s a culture that was created over decades, and it’s going to take time to change that culture. It’s my hope I can jumpstart that change with this book, because the time for change is now. We can’t let another penny bleed down the drains of wastefulness. We truly can’t afford it.

It’s important for me to protect the identity of the individuals in my department and the people I’ve met along the way. Many have been supporting my fight against waste, some silently and some vocally, and you’ll get to hear from them as well in this book. As much as I want to bring a hammer down on waste, I know I can achieve more by just telling these stories straight and letting you, the reader, decide how you feel.

A Call to Action

• The DMV Asleep At The Wheel is a call to action to stop the waste, to pay attention, and to wake up bureaucrats, government employees, and taxpayers alike and ask them to join us in being part of the solution.

I believe I am uniquely qualified to help lead this cause because I have personally witnessed all my stories with the eye of an entrepreneur and on the salary of a government worker. And since most adults have been to the DMV at least once in their lifetime, I feel everyone will relate to these stories. Together, let’s wipe out waste.

• If you are willing to join me on this ride, I will show you problems as well as solutions, and together we can make a difference. I have watched with eyes wide open and documented my three decades in California state employment. I have kept notes on the outrageous waste.

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Can You believe it?

A Crossing Guard and a Tunnel?!

For a visual, here’s a two minute video I’d like you to watch. You’ll learn a lot about a crossing guard for adults, a real character that helped inspire this book.

DMV asleep at the wheel - YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUIu5Y-CRXQ

There are so many people to thank in this journey, but for starters, I’d like to thank reporters Jonas Tichenor, Paul Robins, William La Jeunesse, and Jon Ortiz, whose TV reports and articles about my fight against waste motivated me and enlightened me to write this book. I’d also like to thank my friend Darlene, who is blind but was able to show me the light.

David Bego’s fight to ‘protect employee right’ was inspirational in my quest to stop the ‘donkey cart at DMV’. I never met David in person. I got to know who he is after reading his book, The Devil At My Door Step. Like David, I am on a mission to help voiceless ‘Jose’, the Janitor, get a VOICE.

Thank you, Shannon Grove, a fearless Assemblywoman with a big heart who listened to our Cause and supported us in our fight for Transparency & Choice. She introduced Bills AB 2753 and AB 2754. She is not the selfish person, thinking only what is best for her career; but what she believes in and how to help the people she represents.

And to all my friends at the DMV; l did retire but my heart is still with you. You will relate and connect with some stories, or get a kick out of other bureau-crapic insanities, or flatly deny the foolishness, or cheer when the witches and their prawns are exposed. One thing we all will agree, we can do better to stop the waste, and save our retirement.

Together let’s make our voice heard.

Go to HYPERLINK www.DMVasleep.com share your ideas and solutions.

I’d like to thank my writing consultant for reminding my warrior spirit to always approach everything with love.

Thank you for taking the time to read this book. I challenge each and every one of you to look around and find an opportunity to get involved and make a difference. We can all do something to make our world a better place.

Every single effort adds up to real democracy!

INTRODUCTION

Persistence, thy name is Mariam Noujaim.

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So read the first paragraph in reporter Jon Ortiz’s column, The State Worker, in the Sacramento Bee. The article continued to report the following:

Leaders of the largest state employee union, SEIU Local 1000, probably have some other names for the DMV employee and union member who once again has revved up a lawsuit aimed at prying open the union’s financial records.

The legend of Mariam

The Mighty, as she’s nicknamed, is well known throughout the halls of California. The pint size state employee had been waging a battle for transparency. Simply stated, she wants to see the books.

In a time when those who challenge the status quo often become personal targets, we assembled a gutsy group not afraid to fight for transparency. We were as diverse as California: Democrats, Republicans, and independents of multiple ethnicities, each willing to go on camera to challenge the labor leaders to rethink how they do business.

I wasn’t concerned about the challenges that come with a David and Goliath fight. David won and we will. I am an Egyptian immigrant who left Egypt to live the American dream.

My story cannot be told without telling the story of my home country. The stories of Egypt, the chaos of the streets, the oppression of individual rights give a clarity to why as an immigrant I am fighting so hard for the rights of the people in my adopted country.

‘The DMV Asleep at the Wheel’ is part comedy, as I chronicle my adventures as a new immigrant and the absurdity of certain aspects of my state job, but it’s also a battle cry for labor unions and public-sector employees to work together to challenge government waste. California State employees are foot soldiers, with troops numbering 250,000. They are the frontline, the firsthand witnesses to where the waste in government lies and where we can do better. We want our voices to be heard and encouraged, not ignored and maligned for speaking out.

I am going to take you inside, the behind the counter scene of DMV state of California where they spent money on things which are unnecessary or extravagant. This is a book of true stories which sheds light on the budget problem in a comical way.

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful,

committed citizens can change the world;

indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

—Margaret Mead

1

THE FIGHT

Quite simply, I’ve always been a fighter. I was born with one of those spirits that just won’t let me ignore injustice when I see it. I can’t help myself. Some people can just put up and shut up. Unfortunately, I’m not one of them. Life would be so easy if I could just live my life with blinders on, ignoring the pain and suffering of others. But that’s just not me.

I was raised by a mom who taught me and my brothers to waste nothing.

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Cairo 1964, French Elementary School

Soeurs Franciscaine De Marie

My First Communion Surrounded by

Mom, Dad, and my four siblings

She was brilliant at turning a tight budget into surplus. Mom did the unthinkable: she recycled matches. Yes, matches! It also helps that I was born and raised in Egypt, during a time when women’s rights were rising in Europe and America, but not in the Middle East.

How my tendency to try to right wrongs ended up playing a decade long crusade of fighting government waste comes from fighting oppression. I won’t be held down. Every day, I wake up, still fighting, with a bundle of fresh ideas. My friends are always telling me to give it up, not because they don’t believe in me but because they care about me and know how much it takes out of me. They’ve nicknamed me the Warrior, and I guess it fits because they know I won’t stop until I achieve my objectives.

My main goal is to defend taxpayers from wasteful government spending and outdated costly procedures. I always see the possibilities of where we can do better and how government can solve problems instead of contributing to the problem.

If democracy can’t survive financially, it can’t survive at all. I see many Americans, comfortable and reasonably happy with their life, so they are no longer motivated to actively participate in their democracy. Laziness is dangerous! People look the other way when they see the waste or wrongdoings at work. They might mistakenly feel, It is not my money or problem. But when they get their pay or benefits cut because the state does not have enough money, they get mad and blame the government or someone else. No! Blame yourself for digging your head in the sand. We need you participating in the process.

I am an immigrant. I was not born in the lap of luxury, and I do not take my good job for granted. I have seen real poverty and suffering up close in several countries. I believe America is the greatest country on earth, but I believe it is at serious risk of driving over the cliff of indifference, and it’ll find a very painful landing at the bottom.

I’ve been working in the public sector for more than two decades, but my fight really began in 2010 during the fiscal tsunami of the Great Recession, when the state government employee furloughs started in California. I realized that government and labor unions could be part of the solution if we all tightened our belts. I learned they weren’t trying to hear what I had to say. So I got louder. And I got louder. And I keep getting louder.

My retirement plans are always getting foiled because every year I see another injustice, another battle to fight. I think to myself, I have to stay and fight this.

I am grateful to those who have joined me in this fight because one person alone cannot change an embedded culture of fiscal negligence It takes a large number of concerned citizens from all rank and file to bring about change, and my hope in writing this book is to see those numbers of workers who really do care get involved. I know you’re out there. Most are still too frightened to take action against the status quo, but I just want everyone to participate in the truth.

I want to give thanks to the California Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) for employing me. I am blessed with a steady state job, and because of this, I have been able to live the American dream. I am an entrepreneur who has been able to build other businesses while working a swing shift as a clerk at the DMV headquarters in Sacramento.

As I stated at the beginning, all the opinions in this book, unless otherwise noted, are my own. I do not speak for the DMV. I speak only for myself and for a small group of citizens who see the fatigue of democracy as very dangerous.

With each story in this book, my colleagues will recognize the truthfulness. In my humble opinion, the waste is so unbelievable that it simply becomes comedy at times. I hope by speaking my mind many of you, from either the public or private sector, will join our effort to make a difference.

So that’s