Once Upon a Time: Parallel Lives and the Voyage of Puffin

By Marjorie Shepherd Turner

Long ago, meaning early in the 20th century, before the Great Depression and all the wars of that and this century, before computers and social media, life did indeed go on in the United States. Telephones and radio and automobiles were new and not for everyone. Thus there were the rhythms of life and relationships, more akin to earlier times than to today.
As now, it made a difference if you were born man or woman, black or white or other, rich or poor or whether Roe v. Wade had been decided by the Supreme Court.
These novellas are of those times. Our young people made a voyage without the help of a GPS, using the skills of celestial navigation; our young women, black and white lived parallel lives side by each quietly bound by custom and tradition. What were they thinking? They could not know what lay ahead. So, in a way, they innocently pursued their lives, accepting the good and bad as God's will.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Sep 30, 2014
• ISBN: 9781499039429

Marjorie Shepherd Turner

Merle Turner is a retired academic with a background in Experimental Psychology and the Philosophy of Science. If called upon to append a label to himself he would reach into literary tradition to style himself a "romantic realist." i.e. the admixture of invention and realism. When asked if there is a single theme that might percolate through his stories, he responded that "ventures into quandary" might come close. He is the author of Psychology and the Philosophy of Science :; Philosophy and the Science of Behavior ;Realism and the Explanation of Behavior ; and in his search for romance, Celestial for the Cruising Navigator. Other publications include two collections of Quatroons (quatrains illustrated by a cartoon).

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Copyright © 2014 by Marjorie Shepherd Turner.

ISBN:      Softcover      978-1-4990-3943-6

                eBook            978-1-4990-3942-9

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Rev. date: 09/08/2014

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Contents

Parallel Lives: Louisa Mae and Lena Fae

Voyage of Puffin

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Parallel Lives:

Louisa Mae and Lena Fae

Louisa Mae is pregnant August 1914

Louisa Mae rushed from the hot classroom, pale as her white batiste dress, out of the heavy door, letting it slam behind her, down the long wide hall to the Ladies Room. She just made it into the stall without locking it when she threw up. Oh God, I’m pregnant, she murmured. Her stomach was quiescent but her mind was not.

Two fretful weeks had passed since she had missed her period and now she had little doubt. The relief she felt from the passing of nausea was momentary. She so wanted to think of something else—of Spencer, of her studies, of her father, even of her dead mother, but this new threat crowded all else from her mind. Threat? How could it be a tragedy to be impregnated by the man you most loved and admired? Well it was. Her ambivalence overwhelmed her. Here was a thing, a thing?, out of her control. Gently reared, everyone had always said she was gently reared. Althea had hovered over her, guiding her, protecting her, ministering to her cuts and bruises, be they physical or mental. You are bossy, Althea would say, when Louisa Mae came into the kitchen for solace for some hurt aimed at her by girls she thought were her friends. At other times Louisa Mae was shocked when Liz and others would gang up on her. Defense in numbers. She became the outsider. One day they let all of a ball of twine out on her kite (the only one in the neighborhood) and then, laughing gleefully, had run off home, leaving her to wind in the twine. Really, some people seemed to enjoy any pitfall she might encounter. Her mother had often reminded her, Having money makes a big difference in a girl’s life. You have to be very careful to avoid offending people.

Going to the university? Liz had asked in a tone that meant, Who do you think you are? And Liz had been her closest ally, until……

But then, Louisa Mae had not wanted anything other than what her mother and father wanted for her. Including an education. Until now. Now she wanted something she could not have, not that she really wanted it now, but that it had invaded her life and was there inside her causing her to miss her periods and to lose her breakfast. How could it be, when they mostly had been careful, spilling the precious sperm on the bleached limestone, washing herself carefully in the cold running stream? Fate? Punishment for sin? Just deserves?

The summer term would be over after next week’s exams, and she had no time to face this problem. She would put it aside for the moment. Whatever else, she must take her exams and finish her courses. Then she was expected to go to Houston for a short visit between summer and fall terms. Not a visit she looked forward to. Certainly not now. She would be glad to see Althea for whom she had the affection one feels toward a person who has raised one, the gently reared part. Althea had always treated her as though she was something special, someone who had to be a little lady. She loved Althea even though she was colored, even though she had not been allowed to kiss her. And she knew she could not keep this secret from Althea. On the other hand, Louisa Mae didn’t like to think of seeing her father, now that he was remarried, nor Liz who was no longer a friend, but instead a stepmother! They had tried to laugh about this, but it hadn’t seemed funny to her. No, a visit to Houston now seemed as impossible as this child within her.

Louisa Mae hadn’t looked at Spencer, Professor O’Brien, that is, as she loped out of the room. She had no idea whether he had missed a word in his lecture, as his back was turned to the class as he wrote lupinus subcarnosus on the blackboard. Not very interesting that. Only the Texas bluebonnet everyone knew, as it had been made the state flower in 1901. Louisa Mae was more interested in the rare plants she and Spencer sought in the limestone country around Austin. Still she could enjoy as much as anyone the great displays of bluebonnets each spring. There had been one special field trip in the spring where a busload of students in the new university open bus had gone with Spencer to see the Indian blankets, paintbrush and bluebonnets. Over now, of course. In fact, most wild flowers had ceased their blooming now that the late July heat was so intense.

Because of the heat even with all the windows open, Spencer had solemnly put his seersucker blazer on the back of his chair before he closed the door to the hall and began lecturing. But his stiff white collar and blue tie and warm red face loomed behind the lectern making his red hair even brighter than usual. Summer school in Austin, Texas had its drawbacks. 100 degrees even in a dry climate can be uncomfortable. Had he even noticed that she was leaving? Oh he must have, and he would have wondered. Could he have guessed the cause? Louisa Mae thought about these things but not at the moment she was bent on making the ladies restroom before she threw up.

Fortunately she had not spotted her dress, but she did not attempt to return to the hot classroom even to collect her notebook in which she had so lovingly written the names of plants, making little sketches of them as she learned them. Maybe Ralph who sat next to her would pick it up and return it to her. He often sought excuses to call on her for a chat. He was nice, but seemed such a boy beside Spencer. She tried to discourage his interest in her in as nice a way as possible. She had not come to the university to find a beau nor even love. Love had overtaken her.

Louisa Mae walked slowly toward the Capitol building with its imposing dome, pondering her position. The sun beat down cruelly as she had forgotten her hat that morning. The pathway and occasional sidewalk were dry and dusty and the lilac bushes seemed parched. Shade from an oak tree invited her to pause to catch her breath. She was sweating, that was it, even though she knew that ladies only perspire. Was she a lady, after all, in all this trouble? What was to become of her? She knew so little about having babies. Her mother had lost one child before she was born, a tragedy never discussed, especially, she supposed, because it was the son so desired by her father. How did she lose it? That would be the thing to do, and not a tragedy. Could you do it by exertion in this heat? Louisa Mae entered the rotunda of the Capitol building and decided to run up and down the wide staircases until the unwanted symptoms of pregnancy ended. She met no one as she ran from one floor to another in the deserted building, the legislature not being in session. Once she turned her ankle in the white high top shoes which were not made for running. This slowed but did not stop her. The perspiration, SWEAT, dampened her clothes, first from her armpits and then the back of her dress began sticking to her and she became so hot and exhausted that she finally had to quit. Her brown hair was soaked except at the bun, her eyes watery with the heat, but she felt fine. Unfortunately.

She took a long drink of tepid water from the fountain marked Whites Only and went outside to sit in the shade of one of the pin oak trees on the Capitol lawn hoping for a little breeze. She didn’t feel ill, only hot. Too bad. All that running had been a waste of time. Still, she couldn’t go to her summer rented room until she cooled down.

As she sat down she remembered that she had promised to attend an afternoon rally on campus for visiting suffragettes. When she had promised, she had felt really drawn toward the idea of joining the movement for a vote for women. She had been free to commit herself, and now she was forced to have matters other than voting on her mind. A womanly concern to be sure but not a matter that voting could help. Of course no one would know her secret if she had attended, but she felt unfree, cut off from spontaneity, profoundly troubled, and unworthy of friendship. In spite of her apparent flamboyance, Louisa Mae was often deeply troubled about herself. She didn’t believe in a Higher Being, though she went through the motions every Sunday. And certainly no higher being was responsible for her present dilemma. Prayers would not help and she wasn’t going to pretend they would. And what and who could help her now? She sighed, feeling desolate and lonely.

She was to meet Spencer the next morning for a seed collecting excursion. There were no more flowers, but there were still a few plants with their seeds intact. Bladderpods, for instance. And besides, these excursions were the only means by which they could meet—she his laboratory assistant, dutifully accompanying him on his expeditions into the hill country near Austin in the open university sedan. On one such adventure they had had three flat tires, but nothing bothered them as long as they could have a few hours together. Spencer laughed that he was getting skillful at mending tubes for tires and pumping them up. They carried an extra spare on the passenger’s side with the jack and tire patches. Then they piled all the collected seeds in small boxes which they labeled and put on the back seat. Earlier in the summer they had carried the flower presses there. Oh how wonderful and important it had seemed to work with Spencer!

Perhaps she shouldn’t go tomorrow. This pregnancy was her problem, not his. He would soon be leaving for Vermont to pick up his family. What could he do anyway? He seemed very fond of his children, but he had never mentioned his wife in one way or another. Just gestures sometimes which suggested impatience with his family life. No real complaints. Louisa Mae did not see herself as his solace but as his love. When they were together nothing and no one else in the world mattered. They were part of the great outdoors, a couple of spirits who loved not only each other but also the birds, flowers, even snakes they encountered. They had had no time to talk of any future, nor even to imagine that there was one.

She must not burden him with this. Well, perhaps she could go one more time without telling him. Otherwise she might never see him again. That was unthinkable. Why was this happening to her? True, she was known to her parents as strong-headed, but she had always been sensible. What was there to say? And to whom could it be said? She and Spencer had just been overwhelmed by their emotions. They had touched first in the gathering of flowers to be pressed and later in the careful digging of select plants from an abundant group over the summer. Then they had quite naturally kissed one day as they rose from a kneeling position. Finally, they had lain together. Though she had been a virgin and totally ignorant of having sex, every step toward making love had come as naturally as the first light kiss, had felt inevitable. There was no way she could stop herself from responding. His clear blue eyes had hypnotized her. No words were spoken. After the first day of intimacy, he had hesitated. Was it she who had touched his hard organ inquiringly the next time? Perhaps she led. She had never before experienced the moisture between her legs which invited him into her depths. Could anything so wonderful be wrong? After those first tentative engagements, there was no going back. Well, her head knew that it was dangerous, that it would seem wrong to others, but her head did not seem to be in charge. She also knew she could never explain those feelings nor those actions to another, nor would she try to do so. She hadn’t even tried to explain them to herself. She had known that Spencer was leaving at the end of the summer, that his family would return. She thought she was prepared for that. We must leave Louisa Mae and Spencer’s world, she would say gaily as they parted after unloading the day’s catch in the laboratory. She knew where the real world lay, and what people would think of her and of him. No one would understand. They would simply judge her and condemn her. Her more than him. But the summer was enchanting while it lasted. She didn’t even think into the fall, what it would be like to see him only in his office or in class. She could leave the university if it were too painful.

But now she was pregnant. No one ever said that word. They might say, She is with child. Or more likely She is ruined! Or among men, She is carrying a bastard. The dictionary said there were other meanings for the word pregnant: creative, inventive, fraught with significance or implication, abounding, overflowing, fruitful. But not if you had no husband, if you were not married. No, a fatherless baby was inexcusable and impossible. Out of the question.

Neither of them had thought of that. Certainly she had not. All her life she had heard of the primrose path without ever considering taking it. Why indeed did such a deviation from accepted behavior have a name like primrose path anyway? She felt at once distraught and warmed by the feeling that she was pregnant with Spencer’s child. In other circumstances this would be a cause of joy.

Her mind skipped about maddeningly. She was not going to the suffragette’s rally but she did have a final examination to study for. Her mind quieted a bit. Her resilience and stamina returned. Her defiance, her affection for Spencer, her joy of this summer. Was it wrong to enjoy the feeling of carrying his child while she could? She didn’t care. She would face up next week.

As the sun lowered and a bit of cool evening breeze tempered the heat, she headed back to her room at the Roland’s. Anne was working this summer at a day school in the Methodist church. There was no money in it, but it was a cheerful way to spend the summer. Anne’s mother Nell Roland was a grass widow, that is, had no husband at home, and the room and board Louisa Mae paid was a godsend. Besides, Nell had been a friend of her mother, and was rather a second mother to her. The sorority house where Louisa Mae lived during the fall and winter terms was closed for the summer. Her room at the Roland’s was really a screened porch of their upstairs apartment. Nell fixed meals for both of them, but they didn’t eat before late evening because of the heat. Just drank iced tea until suppertime.

You had a young gentleman caller, said Nell when Louisa Mae came in.

Oh, I can’t imagine…

He left this notebook for you and said he would call back this evening if that was all right. I said I thought he might come by at seven without inconveniencing anyone. Ralph Handle.

He’s in my class. I forgot my notebook.

So he said.

Louisa Mae was in no mood for company, but she went to freshen up anyway. Ralph liked her. She knew that from the way he looked at her and made every opportunity to walk out of class with her. He often urged her to go to the drugstore with him for a soda. But Louisa Mae tried to think of excuses. He seemed so green and awkward.

When he came he asked if she would go out for a soda with him.

But I haven’t had supper…

It won’t take long.

She couldn’t refuse. They walked along slowly toward the drug store. A little breeze had come up and it was pleasant enough. Ralph was evidently getting up his courage to say something important. At last he blurted,

I, uh, like you very much, Louisa Mae. The term is soon over and I don’t see how I can see you again, unless you are willing to go out with me.

Louisa Mae did not know what to say.

Thank you for returning my notebook. I need it to study for the exams.

Oh, that. Are you all right? You looked a green as grass.

Oh, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.

Louisa Mae, I would do anything for you.

Anything? Louisa Mae looked into his eyes inquiringly. Then she smiled. Now that’s a broad statement, sir. What an innocent boy he was. If he only knew, he wouldn’t be so brash.

They parted after the soda without any date set. Louisa Mae gave as an excuse her need for study and the trip to Houston.

What about the fall?

That will be fine. She knew she lied. What about the fall? She didn’t know herself.

Louisa Mae went to bed early, just at dark after supper at nine. Nell’s slaw and ham and home baked rolls were delicious. No nausea now. Louisa Mae secretly vowed to eat nothing in the morning.

As she lay on top of the sheet a great calm swept over her, soothing her. She felt warm with Spencer’s love in her and stroked her stomach under her gown. If only…..

The early sun warmed the morning and Louisa Mae tried to persuade herself to avoid her appointment with Spencer, but at the last moment she rushed to the university garage, breathless and hot but with an empty, settled stomach. She had remembered her hat this time, but her cheeks were red and her eyes unnaturally bright.

With her heart in her throat, Louisa Mae tried to act natural with Spencer, chatting about the morning heat. He found her a little distant, edgy, and not at all ready to joke. The weather taken care of, Louisa Mae was strangely quiet as they rumbled along on the rocky limestone track toward Bull Creek, a repeat of another trip together last spring when she was merely a member of his class and the students had been on a field trip. She was remembering that carefree time and the enthusiasm that both she and Anne had felt for the study of the native plants. Ralph had been along as well, but she had hardly noticed him. It was all so bittersweet to look back on what now seemed a childhood experience unburdened as it was by guilt.

What are you thinking, Louisa Mae? Spencer said this in his low, concerned voice, not the jovial tone he had sung out earlier. In class she was always Miss Lloyd, and there was sweetness in hearing Spencer say her given name.

She could not answer. In spite of her resolve to maintain her silence, she burst into tears. He stopped the car and put his arm around her, drawing her to him. She stiffened and he released her in dismay. She turned her head sharply away from him to hide her tears and threw the car door open. As she got down from the running board, she stumbled and fell. Spencer got out of the car hastily and came around to her, helping her up.

Why don’t we have our lunch right here?

At 9:30 in the morning?

Well, perhaps just a drink of apple juice. We can talk.

I don’t want to talk.

Louisa Mae, I don’t want to leave you. I don’t know what to do.

It isn’t that. You must go. You have the children… and then she truly balled.

Louisa Mae, what is it then?

I can’t say it.

Can’t say what?

That I’m going to have a baby.

Spencer took her in his arms and then led her to the shade of a small cedar tree where, without another word, he methodically unbuttoned her bodice, unlaced her corset, spread his coat and made love to her. The sun was not high enough to reach them behind the bushy tree. Louisa Mae did not resist. Perhaps this would be the last time. In fact, they made love with abandon, for what did it matter now? Spencer was fierce and possessive, Louisa Mae bold and passionate. But they did not talk. What was there to say? Louisa Mae clung to him for a while, and then they dressed soberly.

I don’t know what to say, said Spencer. In other circumstances…

Yes… she replied.

They both felt they could not go back empty handed, so they collected a few seeds, ate their lunch, and reluctantly returned to the lab.

After that, the whole pace of their lives took on an urgency which both felt.

To Louisa Mae their few meetings now became even more precious. She felt desperate to see him while she could. Spencer checked the car out every other day, pleading a need to complete the laboratory collection of seeds before summer’s end. Very few people were around now that the summer term was ending.

They forgot that they might be discovered making love and did not care if they went back empty handed to the laboratory giving themselves the excuse that it was difficult to find the seeds they wanted. Even in so brief a time Louisa Mae was finding it increasingly difficult to fasten her corset and her waist had long since gone to ruin by at least an inch. But they never discussed what was to come next. In their hearts they were mated, at least for now. Louisa Mae did not ask him about his plans nor did he ask about hers. August was ending and with it all of the present and no future beyond it. But sometimes in the throes of love he would whisper, Wait for me… Their excursions now took them to shady creeks where lovemaking could be pleasant even though seeds might be few. Once Spencer slowly ran his hand over her whole body as though memorizing her.

Thus did the sweet murmuring continue for a week after exams were over. Louisa Mae, the sensible, kept her panic at bay that long. On August first, she awoke in a cold sweat. She realized that she was no longer able to put aside the desperation she felt. Even the tenderness in Spencer’s eyes were a warning that she would soon be completely on her own: with child, unmarried. No way out.

That day she went into a doctor’s office which she often had passed on her way to classes. The office was a small bungalow and the front room had been made a receptionist area. The woman at the desk was businesslike but not unkindly. She brushed aside a wisp of grey hair when Louisa Mae asked to see the doctor. She sat rigidly in a straight backed chair and hesitated, but then nodded to Louisa Mae.

Yes Doctor Canady is in.

May I see him?

Yes, as soon as he is done with a patient. What is your complaint?

Indeed, what was it? "I want to