The Grave for Bad Memories

By K.J. Wallace

Catherine Russell lived the first twelve years of her life in poverty. In school,
children teased her everyday because her family was poor, or so she thought. Her
best friend, Gerald Lucas, stood by her side throughout the hard times. As an only
child, Geralds parents supplied all of his wants and needs. Yet when tragedy strikes
Catherines family, he sacrifices his own happiness to save her.
Years later, Geralds womanizing becomes too much for Catherine to bear, and
the life-long friends find themselves at odds. Gerald doesnt see anything wrong
with having sex with twin sisters, and Catherine tries to convince Gerald that he is
sinning. Tragedy strikes again, and the two friends separate. Only to realize some
time later that they are meant to be together.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Nov 2, 2010
• ISBN: 9781453570241

K.J. Wallace

K.J Wallace is the author of The Grave for Bad Memories. She lives in the Washington Metropolitan area with her husband and children. Her leisure time is spent reading, working on her next novel, and visiting with family and friends.

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

Georgia 1921

The first day of school, Henry James Lucas took his seat next to the dark brown little girl with the big eyes whom no one else wanted to sit next to. Clara Jean Anderson stared straight ahead at the blank chalkboard as if she was the only one in the classroom. Her long pigtails looked like braided wool hanging past her shoulders. Clara was wearing a light blue dress with white ruffles around the collar and sleeves. Her white ankle socks were in deep contrast with her dark legs.

Why do you keep staring at me, Henry James? Clara asked, still staring at the chalkboard. Henry hunched his shoulders. He’d done the same thing when he sat next to her in Sunday school the day before. Afterward, his older brothers teased him for liking the little black girl with the big eyes. Henry didn’t care that his brothers teased him. He loved everything about Clara—her small teeth, her thick black hair, her short brown legs, and most of all, her eyes. Clara’s eyes weren’t as dark as most of the other girls in their class who shared her same complexion. Her eyes were brown, a pretty brown, like the color of pecans. Later that day, after he finished eating lunch, Henry gave Clara a house he had made out of twigs that he’d found in his backyard. He told her he wanted to marry her and build her a house just like it, only bigger. Ten years later, when they were eighteen, Henry kept his promise, and he, along with his five brothers, built Clara Jean her house.

CHAPTER 2

Clara only grew a few inches in the ten years since Henry first asked her to marry him. At five feet tall, Clara was thick, big boned is what the old people called it. Her hair was still thick, and when loose, it hung midway her back like curly black wool. Clara’s eyes were what Henry still loved most about her. Her full breasts came in a close second. Henry had grown nearly ten inches since they were in grade school. At six feet tall, he towered over Clara. When he picked her up, she screamed that she wasn’t a toy and demanded that he put her down. He smiled, showing a perfect set of white teeth. You are my toy, Clara Jean, he said as he spun her around in his arms, his sepia eyes glowing.

But you cain’t be spinnin’ me around, Henry James, not while I’m carryin’ your baby in my belly!

Henry stopped in midtwirl and lowered her to the floor. He placed his hand on her swollen stomach.

I’m sorry. I forgot.

At the time, Clara was only four months pregnant, but she looked more like she was seven.

Five months later, early on a Monday morning, Henry’s brother Jacob picked up Clara’s mother Bernice, his mother Erie, and one of the ladies from the church, who had been the midwife to more than half of the women in town. As soon as the women walked into Henry and Clara’s house, they heard Clara crying from her bedroom. She was begging Henry to help her. The three women quickly ushered Henry out of the room, then they focused their attention on Clara. Bernice cradled Clara’s head in her lap and rubbed the damp cloth she’d taken from Henry over her face, while Erie pulled Clara’s nightgown up and held her legs so the midwife could examine her. When Clara screamed and cried out Henry’s name, Jacob grabbed hold of Henry’s arm to keep him from running back inside.

That’s God’s work happening in there right now, Henry. It’s no place for a man.

Jacob was a year older than Henry. He and his wife Julia had a son six months earlier. Julia had been in labor for twenty-two hours before little Julian entered the world screaming. He weighed an even eight pounds.

Henry sat down on the step and ran his hands over his face. I feel so sorry for her. He turned to face his brother. It’s my fault.

It’s not your fault, Henry. Jacob placed his hand on his brother’s shoulder. If you want to blame somebody, blame Eve for eatin’ that apple.

Henry knew Jacob was serious, but he laughed anyway. It didn’t matter to Henry that, after Eve ate the apple God commanded all women would have pain when they gave birth. It was making him sick to his stomach that his Clara was crying and screaming for him to help her while he was sitting helpless on the front porch.

After what seemed like an eternity, Henry and Jacob heard a cry. This time the cry wasn’t from Clara but from his baby. Clara started screaming again just as Henry reached the bedroom door. Her eyes were wide as she looked at him. She waved her hands wildly for him to come to her. Erie was cleaning their son while Bernice tried to keep Clara still.

The worse is over now, Clara Jean. You don’t need to keep on pushin’, the midwife said.

Clara was panting. Yes, I do. Oh God, somethin’s the matter. It still hurts. Henry, help me! Please help me!

Henry looked down at the blood-soaked sheets and then between Clara’s legs where their son had just made his exit.

I’ll kill you if you faint in here, boy! the midwife growled after she saw the expression on Henry’s face.

Henry blinked twice. His words were barely a whisper.

I ain’t gonna faint. He took hold of Clara’s hand and rubbed his thumb over her quivering lips. It’s gonna be all right.

Clara squeezed Henry’s hand as she pushed.

Lord Jesus!

Henry looked at the midwife. What’s the matter?

She stood and showed him the baby cradled in the palm of her hands. It’s another baby, a girl.

Now it was Henry who was crying. A girl! Momma, I have a daughter. I have a daughter, Momma! Tears were streaming down his cheeks when Henry looked at his mother.

I see, baby. I see. Erie Lucas walked over and placed her grandson in his mother’s arms. She took her granddaughter from the midwife and walked over to the basin. Henry left Clara’s side and followed his mother across the room.

Let me do it, Momma.

Shocked, the midwife looked up. That ain’t a job for no man, Henry James. Besides she’s too small for you to be handling. You might hurt her.

I ain’t gonna hurt my baby girl.

Erie saw the look of determination in her son’s eyes and gently placed the baby in his hands.

Be real careful, Henry. She’s awfully small.

I will, Momma. I will.

The four women watched Henry as he held the baby in the palm of his left hand. He dipped the washcloth in the water and slowly let the warm water dribble over the crying baby’s chest. It’s okay, baby girl. Daddy’s got you. It’s okay. Don’t cry.

The baby stopped crying and looked in the direction of the deep voice. That’s right. Daddy’s got you.

Is she all right? Clara asked as she watched Henry from across the room.

She’s just fine, Erie assured her daughter-in-law.

But she’s so small, Clara said as she looked down at their son asleep in her arms.

The baby girl was half the size of her brother. The midwife looked sadly at Clara. She might have a birth defect.

Ain’t nothing wrong with my baby! Henry startled the women with his outburst.

Henry, be careful, honey, Erie said as she laid her hand on his arm. His hands were trembling and she didn’t want him to drop the baby. Henry rarely raised his voice, but the thought that something might be wrong with his daughter had sent a chill down his spine.

Tears stung his eyes. There’s nothing wrong with my little girl. He looked down at his daughter. Her entire body was curled up in the palm of his hand. He finished washing the baby and wrapped her in a blanket. He walked across the room, sat in the wooden rocking chair, and held her in his arms until she fell asleep.

Henry looked at Clara. She’s a treasure, my little jewel. He wiped the tear that was running down his cheek. I’m going to name her Ruby, Ruby Ann.

CHAPTER 3

Ruby Ann didn’t learn to walk until she was eighteen months old. Not because of any birth defect, as the midwife had predicted, but because she was the first girl born in the Lucas family in three generations. Her grandfather, her father, and her five uncles barely let her feet touch the floor. When her feet did touch, they would pick her up if she wobbled even a little. Clara told them that Ruby wasn’t going to break if she fell. Her brother, Richard Anderson, had fallen several times before he mastered the art of walking, and he was just fine. But that didn’t matter to Henry or his brothers. It was as if they truly believed that Ruby would break into a million little pieces if she hit the floor, and there wasn’t anything Clara could say to convince them differently.

Ruby was still half the size of her brother. Richard looked like he was almost three years old instead of two. And because Ruby wasn’t walking, people who didn’t know them couldn’t believe that they were twins. No matter how small Ruby was, Clara couldn’t afford to have her on her hip any longer. She was two months pregnant and she was just as big as she had been when she was four months pregnant with the twins; so one day, while Henry was at work, Clara took matters into her own hands. She planted Ruby’s feet firmly on the floor and slowly backed away.

Come to Momma. Come on, baby, come to Momma, Clara coached, but Ruby stood still.

Look at your brother. He can walk. Now it’s your turn.

Ruby took one step and started to tilt forward. She held her hands close to her chest. Daddee.

You can do it, baby, come on, Clara continued to coach as she backed away. Ruby took another step and stopped again. Tears started to run down her cheeks. Daddee!

Come on, baby. Your daddy’s gonna be real proud of his big girl when he sees she can walk. Clara kept backing away until Ruby crossed the room. She picked her up and gave her a big hug.

You did it, Ruby Ann! That’s Momma’s big girl! Now let’s try it again. Clara had Ruby walk across the floor until she was walking wobble free.

Daniel Thomas, whom Ruby nicknamed Dan-T, was born seven months later. He weighed nine pounds, a pound heavier than Richard was when he was born. His skin was a reddish brown, and he had straight black hair like Erie. Some of the women in the church said that Daniel looked more like a girl than Ruby had when she was born. Their conversations would come to an abrupt halt whenever Erie entered the room. No matter how innocent the gossip, everyone knew better than to talk about Ruby in the presence of anyone whose last name was Lucas.

Clara was pregnant again a year later. She started having problems early on, so her mother and sister, Margaret, came to the house every day to help her with the children. One Sunday, when Clara was seven months pregnant, Bernice and Margaret picked the children up to take them to a program at the church. Clara had started bleeding the day before and the midwife told her that she needed to stay in bed. Clara had never been good at following directions, and as soon as her mother and sister were gone, she got out of bed. She wanted to show them that she wasn’t an invalid and that she could fix dinner for her own family. Her water broke as soon as she walked into the kitchen.

Henry walked in a few minutes later. He found Clara clinging to the stove. Her legs and feet were covered in blood and tears were streaming down her cheeks, but she wasn’t making a sound. Henry rushed over and took hold of her hands. He tried to pry her fingers away from the corners of the stove so that he could carry her to the bedroom, but it was as if her hands were glued to the surface. She was gripping the stove so tightly her arms were trembling. Henry wrapped his arms around Clara from behind and grabbed hold of her wrists. When he pulled her hands away from the stove, her fingers were still crimped as if they were still gripping the corners. Henry laid her on the wooden floor and pulled up her gown. The bacon and scrambled eggs he had eaten for breakfast started to make their way back up when he saw the baby’s head stretching Clara’s opening.

Clara, why’d you get out of bed, baby?

Clara didn’t answer. Instead she dug her heels into the floor and started pushing.

No, Clara. Baby, wait! Henry pleaded. I cain’t do this by myself!

When Clara screamed, Henry grabbed hold of her hands as she bore down and pushed again. Henry looked down and saw the baby’s head making its exit. He let go of Clara’s hands and positioned them under the baby’s head. Clara took another deep breath and pushed again, and the baby dropped into Henry’s hands.

Henry cut the cord with a knife and carried his son into the bedroom. When he got Clara settled in bed, Henry handed her the baby and watched as she nursed their son. He cupped her cheek in the palm of his hand.

Promise me you won’t scare me like that again.

Clara smiled at him. Only if you promise to stop gettin’ me pregnant.

The next day, Bernice offered to keep the children for a few days so Clara could rest. Henry was grateful to his mother-in-law for offering to keep the children. He quickly packed a small bag and drove the children to Bernice’s house, less than a mile down the road. With Daniel in his arms and Richard standing next to him, Henry knocked on the wood that boarded the torn screen door. Bernice opened the door, and took Daniel in her arms, and Richard by the hand.

How are my little angels this fine mornin’?

They’re just fine, Ms. Bernice.

Confused, Bernice looked behind Henry as if he were hiding Ruby in his back pocket. Where’s Ruby Ann?

She’s at home with Clara.

Why didn’t you bring her? I wanted to keep all of the children, so Clara can get some rest.

I’m thankful for your help, Ms. Bernice. Truly I am. But my Ruby is gonna stay at home with me.

It won’t be no trouble for me to keep her. You know Maggie is here, and my sister Annie is—

Henry raised his hand to stop her.

I know all of that, Ms. Bernice, but Ruby is staying with me. I’ll pick the boys up at the end of the week. Henry rubbed the boys on the top of their heads and walked away, leaving Bernice standing in the doorway with her mouth hanging open.

Back at the house, Clara wrapped James Marshall in a blanket and lay him on her bed. Ruby was still asleep on the cot across from their bed. The cot was supposed to be used on the nights when the children were restless and didn’t want to sleep in their own rooms. But Ruby was the only one who ever used the little bed, not because she was restless or afraid to sleep alone, but because Henry didn’t want her to sleep by herself.

Clara slowly made her way toward the kitchen. She pulled the handle on the refrigerator door. She stood with the door open and let the cold air seep through her thin nightgown. It was August, and at seven thirty in the morning, it felt like it was already ninety degrees outside. After she got her fill of the cool air, Clara took a mason jar out of the cabinet and poured herself a glass of water. She pressed the glass against her forehead.

She took a sip of the cool water. Lord that feels so good. She froze with the glass on her lips when she heard Henry’s truck pull up in front of the house. Afraid Henry would fuss if he found her out of bed she tried her best to hurry back to the bedroom. With her legs gapped and her hands on her lower stomach, Clara waddled out of the kitchen. She prayed that she could reach the bedroom before Henry made it up the porch steps.

She turned the corner leading out of the kitchen and stopped. Her hands left her stomach and clenched the collar of her nightgown. When Henry walked through the door his eyes were drawn to Clara standing in the middle of the living room floor, and then they drifted across the room to Ruby who was standing just outside their bedroom door holding the baby.

Daddy, look at my new teddy. Ruby tilted the baby just a bit so that Henry could see him.

Across the room, Clara was holding her breath. Her body was pressed so hard against the wall she looked like a permanent fixture. Henry was calm as he walked toward Ruby.

Let Daddy see. It only took two steps for him to reach her. He placed both hands under the sleeping baby. Clara finally let out the breath she’d been holding. Her legs went limp and she slid slowly to the floor.

Clara.

She waved her hand at Henry to let him know that she was okay.

Henry looked down at the baby and then at Ruby.

Why, look a’ here, Henry started. This ain’t a teddy. This is your new baby brother, James Marshall.

No, Daddy, it’s my teddy bear! Ruby reached for the baby’s arm.

No, Ruby Ann! Clara screamed. That’s your brother! He ain’t no toy!

Ruby jumped back and pressed both of her hands against her chest. Henry raised the baby high, out of Ruby’s reach. His voice was calm.

Don’t yell at her, Clara. She’s just a child. She doesn’t know any better.

Clara sat in the middle of the floor and tried to catch her breath. Henry cradled the baby in his arm and walked over and helped her to her feet.

Go to bed. I’ll explain things to Ruby.

When Clara reached for the baby, Henry held both her hands in one of his and squeezed gently.

I’ll bring him to you in a few minutes. Henry watched her until she was out of sight, then he turned to Ruby. Her bottom lip was quivering and a single tear was running down her cheek.

It’s all right, baby, he soothed as he wiped away her tears. Your momma was scared, that’s why she yelled at you the way she did.

Henry sat down on the sofa and eased Ruby down next to him. He pulled her in close and lifted James so she could see him better. Ruby stared at the baby in disbelief.

Is he a weal baby, Daddy?

Henry laughed at his baby girl whose r’s still sounded like w’s. Yes, he’s a real baby. Your momma had him last night while you were at church with your Grandma Bernice and your Aunt Maggie.

Ruby exchanged her seat on the sofa for one on her father’s lap. But he’s so little.

Yes, he is. But that’s because your momma had him two months early.

James was small compared to his older brothers when they were born. He weighed only five pounds and was only eighteen inches long, almost four inches shorter than what Richard and Daniel had been when they were born. The midwife said James might have been as big as Richard if Clara had carried him the full nine months.

Ruby leaned over and put her hand on the baby’s chest. She quickly pulled her hand back when he moved. Her eyes were wide. It is a weal baby. She jumped down off her father’s leg and poked out her bottom lip.

What’s the matter?

I thought he was a teddy bear.

Henry placed his right thumb on her chin. But having a little brother will be better than having a teddy bear. A teddy bear doesn’t need as much love as a real baby does. He pulled her closer to him. Don’t you want to help your momma take care of a little brother?

Ruby jumped up and down. Yes! Yes! Yes! She plopped down next to her father and cradled her arms in expectation. Can I hold him?

Gingerly, Henry filled her tiny arms with the sleeping baby. Ruby held her brother close to her chest and kissed him on the forehead. She looked up at her father. Can I call him Teddy James?

Sure, baby, you can call him anything you want.

CHAPTER 4

John Anthony was born three years later. Clara was in labor for twenty hours. The midwife told Erie that Clara would need to get to a hospital or else she and the baby would die. Henry was in shock as he listened to his mother tell him what the midwife had said.

Why wasn’t the baby moving? Clara might die. He couldn’t lose Clara, not his Clara, he thought to himself. The colored hospital was an hour away. An hour could be too long.

Jacob placed his hands on either side of Henry’s shoulders and shook him.

Go and get Clara. I’ll drive.

Erie rode in the front seat with Jacob while Henry rode in the backseat with Clara and the midwife. Henry held Clara and rubbed her forehead to her hairline with his hand. He whispered in her ear and told her that everything was going to be all right.

By the time they reached the hospital, Clara was delirious with pain. Her eyes were closed and she was shaking her head wildly from side to side, as she made a deep, throaty humming sound. Her gown was stuck to her body. The top half was soaked with sweat and the bottom half with blood.

Jacob opened the back door and Henry slid out with Clara in his arms. Except for Clara’s swollen stomach, she looked like a child in Henry’s muscular arms as he carried her through the doors of the two-story building that looked more like a schoolhouse than a hospital.

John Anthony was born an hour later by Cesarean section. He weighed ten pounds fourteen ounces and was nearly twenty-four inches long. He was the biggest baby in the nursery.

Clara cried the next morning when the doctor, a short man with milky eyes and white hair, told her that she wouldn’t be able to have any more children. Dr. Mason’s eyebrows, which were the same color as his hair, drew together. He patted Clara on her shoulder.

Now, now, he consoled. He handed her his handkerchief. Instead of crying, you should be thanking our Lord above. John Anthony is a miracle baby. When we got to him, the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and he wasn’t breathing. As for you, you were bleeding profusely and out of your mind with pain. You both would have surely died if your husband hadn’t gotten you here when he did. The doctor took a few steps and turned back. By the way, the nurses have already nicknamed your son Little John. He laughed. Ain’t that something! Your boy is the biggest baby I’ve ever delivered, and that’s saying something.

Clara blew her nose in the kerchief the doctor had given her. She wiped away the tears that were running down her cheeks with the back of her hand and pressed her head against the thin pillow. Dr. Mason had no idea that Clara’s tears weren’t from the pain of knowing she wouldn’t be able to give Henry any more children, but that they were tears of joy. She had thanked God that her new baby was healthy. But she was also thankful she wouldn’t have to go through the pain of childbirth ever again.

Clara was still wiping her eyes when the nurse brought Little John in for his feeding. She patiently waited for Clara to sit up before she placed the baby in her arms. The nurse was thin and almost as tall as Henry. Her black hair was tied in a bun. She placed her hands on her hips and watched the baby as he sucked greedily at Clara’s breast.

Dr. Mason told me how sad you are that you cain’t have any more children. I told him that you were probably crying tears of joy. Am I right?

A smile was Clara’s only answer.

CHAPTER 5

Ten Years Later

At seventeen, Ruby was only four feet seven inches tall and weighed only ninety-eight pounds. At ten, Little John was six inches taller than Ruby and outweighed her by more than twenty pounds. No matter what her size, Ruby ruled the roost. She got up early every morning and helped her mother cook breakfast. When the food was ready, Ruby would stand at the bottom of the stairs, with her hands on her hips, and call each of her brothers by name, Richard, Dan-T, Teddy James, and Little John. The boys would walk down the stairs in the order that their names were called. Ruby would wait until Little John passed, and then she would follow her brothers into the kitchen.

As they walked across the living room floor, Ruby looked more like she should have been in grade school instead of being a senior in high school. Once they were in the kitchen, Henry took his seat at the head of the table, with Clara to his right, Little John to hers, and Dan-T on the end. Ruby sat to Henry’s left, Teddy James to hers, the chair next to Teddy James was empty, and Richard sat across from his father at the opposite end of the table. In sync, they would all bow their heads and Henry would bless the food. This was the way they shared breakfast and dinner every day, their seating arrangements always the same.

That morning Dan-T didn’t want to sit next to Richard, so he started to take the seat next to Ruby. She put her hand in the chair.

This here is Teddy James’s seat!

It don’t have his name on it!

At fifteen, Dan-T was already as tall as Henry and Richard, but Richard was heavier.

You cain’t!

Ruby’s sepia eyes looked like fire as she stared at her brother. Dan-T returned her glare with the same venom. A part of him wanted to push her hand out of the way and sit down, but he knew better.

The summer before, Dan-T had gotten the beating of his life for pushing Ruby. She had confronted him after she found out he’d had sex with one of the girls in her class, Lydia Turner. Lydia was a girl whom Richard liked. Lydia claimed she liked Richard too, but that hadn’t kept her from having sex with Dan-T.

Ruby was upset with both Lydia and Dan-T. Lydia’s sister, Rita Mae, had a crush on Dan-T. He knew she did, but Rita Mae wasn’t Dan-T’s type. She was heavier than Lydia and very outspoken, and like her mother, she stayed in everybody’s business. It didn’t matter to Ruby that Rita Mae had a big mouth, family was family, and Lydia had no business messing around with a boy she knew her sister liked, and Ruby had told Lydia so.

Lydia begged Ruby not to tell Richard. She promised Ruby that she would never let Dan-T touch her again. Ruby decided not to say anything to Richard. She knew Richard would beat the hell out of Dan-T if he found out, but that wasn’t the reason why she didn’t tell. She kept the secret because she didn’t want to see her brother hurt.

Later that day, when Ruby confronted Dan-T, he told her to mind her own business and he pushed her. She landed on her butt, slid across the room, and crashed into the end table. Ruby covered her head as the lamp and the whatknots tumbled down around her. Henry walked in the door just as the last ceramic bird fell and hit the back of Ruby’s hand. It took only two strides for Henry to reach Dan-T. He grabbed a fistful of Dan-T’s hair and dragged him through the kitchen and out the back door.

Clara heard the commotion from her bedroom, but by the time she reached the living room, Henry was already heading across the backyard. Both of Dan-T’s hands were clamped tight around his father’s wrists as he struggled to keep up the pace. He feared that if he stumbled his father would tear a hole in his scalp. Clara finally caught up with them in the barn. Henry was swinging his belt so wildly Clara had to jump back to keep from being hit. She begged Henry to stop, but her pleas fell on deaf ears. Henry kept on swinging. The belt hit Dan-T across his back, his arms, legs, and any other body part that got in the way. The last whip of the thick leather strap connected with the back of Dan-T’s neck. Henry was raising his arm to strike again. He stopped in midswing when he heard Ruby scream, Daddy, stop!

Dan-T was lying in a fetal position, crying. Both of his hands were covering his head. He really hadn’t pushed Ruby that hard. She was just so small, and he didn’t know his own strength.

As he looked down at his sister now, he wouldn’t dare touch her, not even to move her hand out of the chair. So he took his seat next to Richard and waited for his father to say grace.

Dan-T was feeling guilty about his relationship with Lydia Turner. That’s why he didn’t want to sit next to Richard during breakfast. Lydia was Richard’s girlfriend, at least that’s what Richard thought, but Lydia and Dan-T had made their way into her father’s barn the day before, and they hadn’t come out until two hours later.

Ruby felt her heart muscles tighten as she looked across the table at her twin brother. Richard didn’t have a clue that his own brother was sticking his penis in the same hole that he was. Ruby just couldn’t understand why Dan-T was the way he was. At fifteen, he could have had any girl that he wanted, so why did he want his brother’s girlfriend?

Ruby had heard the stories about Lucas men. How they loved sex. They can’t do without it, her great-grandmother, Iris, told her aunts one day when they were at the house. Her great-grandfather had been killed by his lover’s husband. Ruby overheard Iris tell her aunts that she had never been able to satisfy her husband sexually. He wanted it all the time, she said. I just couldn’t keep up with him.

It’s a dangerous game, sneaking around having sex with people you have no business having sex with, Ruby thought, as she looked across the table at her brother. Her great-grandmother had to raise her three sons alone because her great-grandfather had found pleasure with another man’s woman. Apparently, Dan-T had the same knack for finding pleasure in the wrong places that his great-grandfather had. As she looked at her brother, Ruby made up her mind that she would put an end to Dan-T and Lydia’s little affair before Richard found out about it. She would wait until her father and brothers left for work, and then she would walk across the field to the Turner’s house and talk to Lydia again.

It was one in the afternoon when Clara put the homemade biscuits in the oven. Henry and the boys would be home for lunch in a few minutes, and she wanted to have lunch ready for them. Clara didn’t think anything about Ruby being at the Turner’s house all morning. After spending every day with four brothers, Clara figured Ruby needed to spend some time in a house full of girls. She knew Ruby didn’t care much for the Turner’s oldest girl, Lydia. Ruby taught the Sunday school class for the two younger girls, Adel, who was the same age as Teddy James, and Joan, who was a month older than Little John. Both of the girls loved Ruby. If their mother would have let them, the girls would have sat next to Ruby during church service.

Clara took the biscuits out of the oven just as Henry pulled up in the driveway. Teddy James was the first to come barreling in the kitchen. He stopped next to the stove and looked around the room.

Where’s Ruby?

I love you too, Clara said with a smile. Ruby is over at the Turner’s. You can walk over and get her if you want. Clara knew that Teddy James wouldn’t hesitate to go and get his big sister. The two had been inseparable ever since that day she carried him out of the bedroom.

Richard heard what his mother told Teddy James and asked Henry if he could drive over and pick up Ruby. He wanted to see Lydia even if it would only be for a few minutes. Henry tossed Richard the keys to his truck before he went to wash up for lunch.

Don’t be too long! Clara called after Richard and Teddy James as they bolted out of the door. Lunch is almost ready!

We won’t, Momma! Teddy James yelled back.

Ten minutes later, Richard came running in the house. A sobbing Teddy James was right behind him. Richard was bent over, holding his stomach. Tears were running down his cheeks when he told his father that Ruby had never made it to the Turner’s house.

Clara had fainted shortly after she heard Richard say the words Ruby never made it to the Turner’s. Now, Clara lay with her head on her mother’s lap. Her hands covered her ears to muffle the sound of the hound dogs barking outside.

People came from miles around when they heard that Ruby was missing. Less than a mile away, Henry’s best friend, Eldridge Turner, dropped to his knees. He saw the light haze of smoke under the trees in the woods and thought that someone was burning leaves. As he walked closer, he saw the small hand sticking out from under one of the branches and realized that he’d found Ruby.

Jacob saw Eldridge kneeling in the distance and walked toward him. Eldridge was crying so hard he didn’t hear Jacob until he was standing right behind him.

God no! Jacob dropped to his knees, buried his head in his hands, and cried.

Solomon and Alexander were crying as they held on to their youngest brother. They didn’t want Henry to see Ruby’s lifeless body. Henry threw blow after blow, and broke free time after time, as he ran toward Eldridge and Jacob. Henry was within five yards of Ruby’s body when Solomon finally tackled him to the ground. He wrapped his arms around Henry’s waist while Alexander grabbed hold of Henry’s legs. The two men pinned their brother to the ground and held him until Henry was no longer able to move. Consumed by grief, Henry lay on his back in the middle of the field and cried.

Henry died of a heart attack three weeks later. Clara buried him next to Ruby.

CHAPTER 6

Hillside, Maryland, 1962

It was two days before Christmas and flurries were dancing in the air. James Marshall hated the winter. His first and only car accident had happened when there was less than an inch of snow on the ground. The next winter he refused to go to work when the weatherman even hinted that it would snow. After needlessly using several hours of his leave, he came to the conclusion that the weathermen were wrong more than they were right.

Today the weatherman predicted that there would be flurries by late afternoon. James went in early so he could leave early. He timed it just right. Light flurries had just started to fall when he walked out of his office building. The flurries didn’t turn into big flakes of snow until James pulled into his driveway. He thanked God and reached in the backseat to get the diapers and milk that he’d picked up at the grocery store on his way home.

His wife, Elena, stepped out on the porch. She held her hands, with the palms upward, and tried to catch the snow flakes.

Girl, you’d better get back in the house before you catch your death of cold, James said when he saw that she wasn’t wearing any shoes.

Elena wrapped her arms around James’s neck. She held her face toward the sky and stuck out her tongue. She giggled when a big flake of snow landed on her nose, instead of in her mouth.

James had met Elena three months after she’d arrived in the States. He was working his part-time job at the Safeway when Elena walked in. It wasn’t raining outside, but she was wearing a black raincoat that stopped at her knees. A pink flannel nightgown dangled four inches below the hem of her raincoat. Elena was wearing a pair of black ballerina slippers and a dark pair of sunglasses covered her eyes. Her sunglasses were what made James take notice. It was fifteen minutes before the store was about to close, and it was the moon, not the sun, that was shedding light on the parking lot outside.

Elena scurried through the store and started filling her arms with groceries. Within a few minutes, she was in his line carrying a gallon of milk, a half gallon of orange juice, a dozen eggs, bacon, and a loaf of bread. Elena lowered her head when she saw that James was staring at her. She was still staring at the floor when she handed him the folded $20 bill that she’d pulled out of her coat pocket.

Just as James handed Elena the bag of groceries, a man slammed his palm against the glass. James could hear the man when he screamed from outside for her to hurry the hell up! Elena jumped and clutched the brown bag close to her chest. She didn’t leave the store as fast as she’d come in. Now, it was baby steps she took as she left the

check-out stand.

James glared at the man, who kept glancing at his watch as he paced back and forth in front of the glass. The man met Elena at the door and snatched her up by the arm. Her feet were barely touching the ground as he dragged her across the parking lot. James could feel the blood burning in his veins like hot lava. The young girl barely weighed a hundred pounds and here she was being manhandled by someone who more than doubled her weight. James couldn’t stand to see a woman being mistreated. He untied his smock, pulled it over his head, and threw it on the floor. He left his register and walked outside. He heard the man call the girl a worthless bitch. He followed up by saying that he should ship her yellow ass back where he got her from.

James quickened his step. He caught up to them just as the man pushed Elena headfirst into the backseat of his white Mercedes.

Why don’t you pick on someone your own size? James was standing less than three feet behind them.

The man turned on his heels. His words were slurred, and James could smell alcohol on his breath. Take your black ass back in the store, nigger!

Eddie, the store manager, stepped in front of James and tried to put some distance between the two men. There’s no need for name-calling.

The man smacked Eddie’s hand away from his chest and stretched his neck until their noses were within an inch of each other. Then I suggest you keep your boy on a leash!

A knot formed in the pit of James’s stomach. To escape the racism of the South, he’d left Georgia with his suitcase in one hand and a one-way bus ticket in the other. He boarded a bus to Washington DC. The next morning he stepped off the bus in front of the Greyhound Bus station. He caught another bus that dropped him off two blocks from Howard University, where he earned his bachelor’s degree in accounting. Now, he worked full-time at the Bureau of Engraving and part-time at the Safeway, and in a few months he would have enough money saved to buy a house.

But none of that mattered to the man standing in front of him. He didn’t know anything about James yet he’d called him a boy, and even worse, he’d called him a nigger. The last word was one that James hoped would one day be banned from the English language.

The man brushed past Eddie and walked over to the driver’s side of the car. James wanted to stop him, but he knew that he would be the one who would be arrested if he did, so he watched the Mercedes speed out of the parking lot.

The next day Eddie was waiting when James arrived at work. Eddie pointed toward his office. He told James that Elena had arrived a few minutes earlier. James went into the cramped little office and sat in the chair next to Elena. His hands formed into fists when he saw the crusted blood around the cut on her bottom lip and the bruise that darkened her left cheek. Elena was no longer wearing the sunglasses that had covered her black eye, but she was still wearing the raincoat and the nightgown that she’d had on the night before. Her hands were trembling and she was crying. Her accent was strong as she told James how she and four other girls were brought to America

from the Philippines.

When they arrived, each girl was told the last name of the family they would be working for. Elliott was the last name of the family Elena would be staying with. The day before, Mrs. Elliott had spent the day shopping with two of her friends. After she’d finished the dinner dishes, Elena reminded Mrs. Elliott that she needed to drive her to the grocery store so that she could buy the bacon and eggs for Mr. Elliott’s breakfast the next morning. Mrs. Elliott told Elena that she had a headache and that she would take her after she took a nap. Her nap lasted for three hours. While she was asleep, Mr. Elliott came home from work, and their five-year-old son was sitting at the kitchen table crying. He wanted a glass of chocolate milk, but there was no milk in the refrigerator. Mr. Elliott blamed Elena, and when she tried to explain that she was waiting for Mrs. Elliott to wake up and take her to the store, he called her a liar. Elena begged him to talk to his wife, but when he did, Mrs. Elliott told her husband that Elena never mentioned that she needed to go to the store. Elena’s black eye was the result of Mrs. Elliott’s lie.

Elena was crying uncontrollably when she told James that she couldn’t return home. Both of her parents were dead. She went to live with her mother’s sister and her husband when she was twelve. When Elena turned eighteen, her uncle arranged for her to come to the United States. She was supposed to send part of her pay back home every month. Her uncle told her before she left that she needed to repay them for taking care of her for six years.

James raised his hand. I’ve heard enough.

Please, Elena pleaded.

Don’t say another word.

James felt as if he were about to get sick on his stomach. His grandfather, and his uncles, had helped take care of his family after his father died. They gave his mother money to buy food, and they put a new roof on the house when the old one started leaking. It was his Uncle Solomon who had paid for his bus ticket when he left home. His grandfather paid his college tuition, and his Uncle Alexander had helped to pay for his books. His Uncle Jacob had helped him buy his first car, and not one of them had asked for a single, solitary dime in repayment. Family was supposed to take care of family, that’s the way it is suppose to be.

James took Elena by the hand. You can stay with me.

Elena cried all the way to the small one-bedroom apartment. She couldn’t believe that this man was being so kind to her. After the way that Mr. Elliott had treated her, Elena thought that all Americans were mean and evil.

When Elena prepared to make her bed on the floor, James stopped her and showed her to the bedroom. The first three months, James slept on the sofa. Six months later they were married.

That was two years ago. Now he was holding Elena on their front porch as the snow settled around them.

CHAPTER 7

God, please don’t let me lose my baby.

Joan Russell prayed as she crawled across the kitchen floor. Blood was dripping from her nose, and her left eye was almost closed. She was only seven months pregnant and she was having contractions. She stopped crawling and placed her hand on her stomach when she felt warm liquid run down her legs. She started to crawl again when the pain stopped.

The phone was hanging too high on the wall for her to reach it without standing, so she grabbed hold of the cord that was dangling within inches of the floor and pulled. The receiver dropped and nearly hit her swollen eye. Joan dialed the number that she knew all too well. She prayed that he would be at home.

James and Elena were still standing on the porch when the phone started ringing. Elena uncoiled her legs from around James’s waist and raced inside. She didn’t want the ringing phone to wake the baby. Elena had heard the weak and helpless voice many times before. Sadly, she handed the phone to James.

Hello. He could only hear breathing on the other end. Joanie, is that you?

Joan was nodding her head yes, but no words passed her lips. I’ll be there in a few minutes.

James rushed out of the house. Outside, he left one footprint on the porch and another at the bottom of the three steps. He turned right at the end of his walkway and ran down the street. He crossed the street six houses down. His feet kicked snow over the fresh tire tracks in the driveway. James took the six steps leading to the porch three at a time. When he stepped onto the porch, his left foot slid out from under him. He put his hand down to catch himself. James put his hands on his knees and tried to catch his breath. His eyes were even with the doorknob and he saw that the door wasn’t all the way closed. He pushed the door open and stepped inside.

Joanie! James called. He walked through the living room toward the sound of the dial tone coming from the back of the house. He found Joan unconscious on the kitchen floor. The receiver was on the floor next to her.

Five hours later, a nurse walked into the waiting room and looked around.

Is anyone with Joan Russell?

James stood to his feet. I am.

The nurse stared at James for a few minutes.

Are you her husband?

No. I’m a family friend, Joan’s family friend. And no, I don’t know where her husband is. He added the last sentence before the nurse could ask.

Is Joan going to be all right?

The nurse looked up at him. Her blue eyes had softened some, but James still felt as if she were looking straight through him.

Since you’re not her husband, I’m not at liberty to say.

James stepped in front of her when she turned to walk away.

Can I see her?

The nurse looked up at him. What is your name?

James Lucas, but Joanie, I mean, Joan, calls me Teddy James.

Well, Mr. Lucas. The baby finger on Mrs. Russell’s left hand is broken. Her left eye is swollen shut, and her right nostril had to be packed to stop the bleeding. Mrs. Russell was only seven months pregnant and her husband saw fit to use her stomach as a punching bag. The doctor had to perform a Cesarean section shortly after the ambulance brought her in. Her little girl only weighs two pounds, and the doctors aren’t sure if she’s going to live. So the answer to your question is no.

The nurse stepped to the side and