Godly Sins

By Clara Loveman

Godly Sins is the second installment in the futuristic new Crown of Crowns Young Adult saga by Clara Loveman, raising the stakes in a galaxy-spanning story that's been described as "sweeping, epic, and engrossing" and the perfect new series for fans of The Hunger Games,

• Language: English
• Publisher: Content7
• Release date: Jun 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781838062323

Clara Loveman

Clara Loveman graduated from Liverpool John Moores University and has an MPH from the University of Sheffield. She lives in Maidenhead, UK, a riverside town not far from Windsor.

Book preview

1

The clock struck ten, and the chime went off just as we landed under the moonless sky.

Seven days to go, the Crown of Crowns said. In the lead are Erda and Lithra from Spectrius Z8.

Relieved, I let out a long sigh, and Roki held out his hand. I clutched it and took a sharp breath before we stepped together onto the papery golden walkway. That Roki and I were in VondRust like this was almost too surreal to believe. It wasn’t a problem to be in VondRust now that our twins were about to start high school. It was more that I felt undeserving of the hero’s welcome. It was so strange to be back in the palace in another person’s skin.

The lights shone so brightly in our faces that I could hardly see the distinguished royals lined up in front of us. All I could do was smile and look down at the delicate flooring, picking out the individual bodily scents from the lightly fragranced air that swirled around us. It was how I knew exactly who awaited us at the other end of the raised passageway, apart from Zawne and Lordin; I could smell the pheromones of each particular person. I felt Raad and Tissa’s presence at the end of the line, solemn and reflective. Seeing them again without having to hide was the only thing that brought me any warmth. Next to them were Zawne’s parents. Beyond them, inside the ballroom, the other guests chatted quietly among themselves.

The flyrarc rose behind us and took to the sky, and we sauntered quietly to the royals. We were dressed to match them, me in a gown of the finest silk with a satin bodice and Roki in his handsome velveteen suit. The thirty steps between us and them was far enough for the entire world to catch us from a hundred different angles with their visins. I didn’t think too much about our audience. My concentration was fixed on Zawne and Lordin. When Roki and I reached them, we bowed low. How strange it felt to bow to my ex-husband in a different body—and with Lordin at his side!

It was the first time I’d seen Zawne face-to-face in my Min form. Even though I suspected that Lordin might have changed his memories for this occasion, I quickly downloaded his memories and scanned them. True to form, all I could find was a memory left on purpose, intended as a message. I watched the memory of Zawne talking to himself in the mirror, asking to see me at some point that night. How convenient.

Please rise, Zawne said.

My eyes met Lordin’s first. Your Most Supreme Majesties, I said, looking from Lordin to Zawne.

Welcome to VondRust Palace, Lordin replied. She was beautiful in Hagan’s body, her jeweled evening dress glittering in the light. Today Geniverd awards you both the highest honor of our land. All the clan leaders and heirs have joined us here to show the world our respect for you. Tell us, how was your journey?

I tried to smile for the cameras, all the P2 drones floating overhead. I had to remind myself that the award was from the people, not from Lordin herself. Roki and I had been nominated by the clan leaders and the people of Geniverd for our part in saving the world, and that put Zawne and Lordin in an impossible position. Knowing it wasn’t their choosing helped a little.

Very secure, I said, trying to use the fewest words possible. I couldn’t change the fact they were together or that I had to face them. An award like this had to be presented by the king and queen. It almost brought tears to my eyes that Lordin was leading my people. So much had changed in so little time, and almost none of it for the better.

It was only five months ago that Xerx and Vowkin had been born. At two days old, I’d wanted them to see the world they’d been born into, my world of Geniverd. We had gone traveling as a family, keeping a low profile to avoid being recognized. Being summoned to VondRust months later had presented the perfect opportunity for us to introduce the twins as our adopted children. The problem with Min children was that they grew too fast. Roki and I were teenagers ourselves, and it would have looked out of place for us to have teenagers of our own. I hated lying, but it had to be done. It was the rule set for us by the Crown of Crowns. We couldn’t reveal their secret—not that I would have, anyway—and so we lived with the lie. These children were my responsibility. They were of my flesh, my blood, and my spirit.

The trip had been good for us as a family. As Min, we were able to explore every far-flung nook and cranny in Geniverd. It had been the breathing room I’d so desperately needed after all the excitement that had happened once I became a Min. Zawne’s audacity to make Lordin his new queen had been too much for me to bear, never mind the way he’d done it.

She means we’re very grateful for the royal Protectors, Roki said on my behalf, flashing the handsome smile I loved so much. As you know, we have our own people, and we could have made our own way just as easily. But we’re grateful for the gesture. It was a safe flight.

Zawne chuckled. We simply didn’t want to ruin the surprise. His voice was deep and low, almost a hum. Lordin tucked her arm under his elbow and looked me in the face, smiling pleasantly. Even in her new form, she seemed too sweet to fully take in. But of course, this was all for the benefit of the billions of people who were watching at home. As you can see, Zawne said, we have Geniverd’s finest people waiting to award you the Shield, our highest honor, for your efforts in the pandemic.

I raised my eyebrows and feigned surprise. We’d known about the accolade and the accompanying banquet for days through Roki’s spy network of fellow Min. I did my best to act thrilled at receiving such a prestigious award, but inside I was dying. I just didn’t understand why Zawne had taken Lordin back, and it was all I could think about. Most likely he didn’t know the full story, and that was my fault. I had left him to deal with the aftermath of the pandemic and my death, and my absence had been the perfect opportunity for Lordin to pounce on him. At the time, I’d thought it was selfish of me to tell him how to live his life. I had no right after leaving him the way I did. And then everything happened so fast, the babies and their incredible growth. Now I felt like he was punishing me for my decision to leave him and join the spirit world.

This evening is all for you, Lordin said, gesturing around us with her free hand. Geniverd is most grateful.

Eight Protectors ushered Zawne and Lordin into the palace, and we followed behind, ready to bow and greet each of the twelve clan leaders.

It wasn’t long before we got to Zawne’s parents. The King Emeritus and Queen Emerita were both friendly and chatty. They talked about the traditional Gaard wines the palace had ordered for the evening, saying they were sure we would love them. They even turned to Raad and Tissa to fully express their love for the winemaker.

As Raad and Tissa looked upon us kindly, I knew neither of them wanted to be there. Being a Min did have its perks—namely, allowing me to read the minds of humans. I knew Tissa was thinking that she would only stay for a maximum of two days and not one minute more. Two days would be enough not to slight the monarchs. There was no way she would stay for ten days at a lavish banquet thrown by the same people who’d treated me so despicably, her dear friend and sister-in-law. At the same time, Raad was thinking about when to find a private moment alone with Zawne so that he could condemn him for taking a new wife merely a week after I’d been buried. That was when I heard quiet barking. Rein and Forschi were perched at Tissa’s feet, tongues lolling and tails wagging. They appeared to have grown fur coats that sparkled in the light.

I knew Raad and Tissa wouldn’t engage in small talk with us in such a formal environment, but I didn’t know if I would have any more time with them afterward. So, after we’d bowed, even though it was considered uncouth for a commoner to speak first, I said in a quiet voice, You remember us, don’t you? We came to you with the cure.

Oh yes, of course, Tissa said. That’s the whole idea behind your award. Tissa’s eyes lit up, and she managed a small laugh as her voice trailed off. All the while, she was thinking, How can this nobody think I’d remember anything that happened? Kaelyn had just been murdered in cold blood. Some people are so hard to like!

You saved the world, Raad cut in, authority thick in his voice. He had grown even bolder from ruling Gaard. Thank you for coming to us first and entrusting us with the cure.

Roki smiled and said, Gaard-Elder, Gaard-Ma, it was your quick thinking and fast action that saved the world. You were grieving, but you still offered your time, which was instrumental in the whole process. It is entirely feasible that the other clan leaders wouldn’t have believed us and the virus would have taken even more lives.

Thank you, Raad and Tissa said simultaneously, tipping their heads as if to end the conversation and move us along.

The meeting pained me. If the next day weren’t the first day of high school for the twins, I might have considered staying the night, if only to forge some kind of relationship with Raad and Tissa in my new life. But I also saw how hard it was for them to see us. The day I’d entered their world as Cerna had been the worst day of their lives. I needed to accept that they could never know who I was.

---

* * *

Raad and Tissa were ushered away from us to mingle with the other guests. A courtier informed us that we would be free to interact with everyone else following the award presentation, which was to happen within minutes. Everyone in the room was led to the adjoining ballroom, where Roki and I were asked to stand before Zawne and Lordin. The Grucken then appeared and, after a few words of welcome, invited Lordin to make a speech.

We have no doubt that the Gurnots killed our late queen and started the pandemic, Lordin said to the room. The king and I are aware of the rumors that Queen Kaelyn had a hand in the spread of the pandemic. Unfortunately, we can neither confirm nor deny these rumors. She winked at me, sending a shiver down my spine. What was she doing? If it weren’t for the Crown of Crowns, she’d probably have revealed that I was Kaelyn! In these times of aggression, we cannot forget that our continents stand united. The monarchs who came before us defeated every cancer and disease that threatened to blight our society, including any possible uprising. Along with our Askas, our Protectors, and our precious Decens-Lenitas, we will continue to prosper and hold our world together.

She took a breath, letting her eyes pass over those in the crowd. Make no mistake, Gurnots are our biggest threat. Let that be absolutely clear. They killed millions of our people by unleashing the virus. King Zawne and I promise that we are going to pull the Gurnot vermin from their lairs and exterminate them. We are going to bring back some of the ancient punishments from hundreds of years ago to show how serious we are. We vow to burn the Gurnot leaders at the stake!

Everyone clapped and cheered, the whole lot of savage rich people. It didn’t surprise me that she was using this ceremony as an opportunity to attack Defiance, all the while presenting herself as the saint everyone thought she was. What kind of people clapped for such a brutal threat from their queen? This was the one time I wished Lordin could hear my thoughts, so she would know exactly what I thought of her.

Let us not bog down such a magnificent ceremony, nor the thing that has brought us here in the first place, Lordin continued. Before I present the awards, I want to make a special announcement. King Zawne and I have decided that everyone in Geniverd should have three days to celebrate this momentous achievement. We’ve all been through a very rough time. Our loved ones have been taken from us. Innocent people have been slaughtered in the streets of Nurlie. It is truly tragic what has happened. But we must look at the bigger picture. This pandemic could have obliterated mankind. It is thanks to these two individuals that we’re still standing. We must be grateful our important moral code is still intact, and for that, we will celebrate for three full days. We’ve laid on food, drinks, street parties, costumes, decorations, and entertainment for all.

She held out her hand to a courtier, who gave her and Zawne our medals. I seethed as Lordin placed the award around my shoulders, Zawne doing the same for Roki. I was sure Lordin could see my blood boiling under my skin while everyone clapped.

After the short presentation, music was played while a courtier announced that the live broadcast had ended. We were now free to move between ten huge ballrooms, where we could enjoy food, drinks, and all kinds of royal entertainment for the next ten days. However, the ‘we’ did not extend to Roki and me, since we were not of the royal persuasion. We were permitted one night in the palace, and that was it, even if we had just saved the world. Some thanks. Not that I wanted to stay. The ordinary people had suffered the most and deserved so much more; three festive days were an insult in comparison to what the nobility had arranged for themselves.

Lordin and Zawne were being pulled in every direction by clan heads and other highborn people. Roki and I lingered at the fringes of the party, and that was when a bulky young man approached us. I knew right away he was a Min from the fiery Valer in his chest. He had long raven hair tied back, strong brows, and angular cheekbones. Roki greeted him, and the two men hugged. From over Roki’s shoulder, the newcomer gazed at me warmly.

Roki, he said in a rich, deep voice when he finally took his eyes off me. How long will you stay at the party?

I’m afraid we’re just here for a few hours. There is no need for us to spend the night. Oh, I don’t think you’ve met my girlfriend, have you?

The big guy shook his head, his gaze back on me, holding my eyes. I think I would have remembered.

Well, Roki said, and gestured to me, Knotts, meet Cerna.

An honor to finally meet you, he said, pulling closer. We exchanged kisses on both cheeks. It’s a shame that you’re leaving so early. We could have used you to really beautify this palace.

Knotts had a natural charm about him. I couldn’t help but smile and assume familiarity. But I worried that a comment like that might draw unwanted attention to me, especially as there were several people within earshot. Shh, I whispered. There’s Queen Hagan here to do that.

Don’t worry, Knotts said, seeing my unease. They won’t suspect anything. Anyway, you’re allowed to say that. I’m not, because I know how much it upsets you.

Who is this guy? I wondered, glancing at Roki. How much did Knotts really know?

Before you go, he added, have you tasted my wine yet? He stopped a server holding a silver tray and grabbed some glasses for all of us. Then Knotts made a toast. Here’s to you, he said merrily, the saviors of Geniverd. We all drank, then put our empty glasses back on the server’s tray. Cerna, Knotts said, do you mind if I borrow Roki for a couple of minutes?

Not at all, I said.

The two men went off, and I was by myself in a room overcrowded with people talking in pairs. Great, I thought, now I’m alone. Thanks, Knotts. Raad and Tissa were making their way to the next room, flanked by colorful nobles I didn’t recognize. I wondered whether anyone would miss Roki and me if we left within the hour. I smoothed down my gown and tried to slow my breathing. That was when I felt the presence of someone I knew all too well approaching from behind.

Did you get my message?

Zawne wasn’t one to waste time over pleasantries. I turned around and, after a slight bow, followed his lead. I did. I don’t know how much time we have, but I must tell you how shocked I am that you made Lordin queen only a week after—

It had to be done, he said, cutting me off. It wasn’t personal.

My heart thudded dully in my chest. From where I’m sitting, it feels very personal, Zawne.

It was true that I didn’t have romantic feelings for Zawne anymore. Still, I cared about him. There were so many women in the world he could have chosen to date, and he had picked Lordin. I just wanted what was best for him.

Actually, he said, Lordin told me she’s the one who found the antiviral, and that after she found it, you stole it from her to try to impress me.

No! I said, my voice cracking with emotion. After all this time, do you really think I’m that kind of person? Have you not figured out whose side I’m on yet, Zawne? Lordin was holding the cure hostage and working with her evil mother.

I think you’ll find she was working against Emell all along, Zawne said with his nose turned up at me, as if he hadn’t heard a single word I’d said. Lordin led us to Emell and we imprisoned her.

No, you’re mistaken, I said in an angry whisper.

He shook his head. I could see there wasn’t anything I could say that would change Zawne’s mind. In any case, I didn’t want to be the one to show him Lordin’s wickedness. If he was going to be convinced, he needed to witness irrefutable proof firsthand. I hoped that one day he would see her for the evil witch she was.

Besides, what is it to you that I’m back with Lordin? he asked. "You’re the one who changed and then disappeared for nearly six months. You know it bugged me that you sacrificed yourself. You had everything, Kaelyn, and I was fiercely loyal to you. You didn’t have to save the world. There were people doing it for us. You think the Crown of Crowns would have let humanity die out?"

They nearly did! I wanted to scream. Yet it was no use arguing with Zawne. I wanted to tell him about the Geniverd he’d never seen, the naturally beautiful places I’d discovered while exploring with Xerx and Vowkin and avoiding the major cities. The untrodden deep caves in Krug, the serene Nurlie archipelagoes, the undisturbed blue lakes in Gaard. His royal head had no patience for any of that. I just wanted to have a normal conversation with Zawne, but he was clearly too stubborn.

You know I couldn’t just sit by and do nothing, I said, folding my arms and frowning.

He shook his head. I knew that Zawne thought I had become a Min to be with Roki, the ultimate betrayal of his trust and loyalty. There was nothing I could say to convince him otherwise, especially since he was with Lordin now and had her