A Tremendous A Lot

By Jordan Dickerson

-Pregnant Eve needs to escape from her abusive husband, Kris, but her plans get ruined when she goes into labor on the first day of winter.

-Peter desires purpose and direction in his life and finds it in a church but the devote pastor there threatens

• Language: English
• Publisher: Redmond Waters LLC
• Release date: Feb 13, 2021
• ISBN: 9781736640319

Jordan Dickerson

Jordan Dickerson is a software engineer who started his writing career off by writing articles for his company's newsletter. He focused his attention on short stories and has also written a screenplay. Though a lover of stories in all their forms, he is particularly attracted to irony, tragedy, and complex storylines. He lives in Vancouver, Washington.

Book preview

A Tremendous A Lot

By

Jordan Dickerson

Copyright © 2021 by Redmond Waters LLC

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed Attention: Permissions Coordinator, at the address below.

Redmond Waters LLC

867 W Bloomingdale Ave

Suite 7051

Brandon, FL 33508

www.redmondwaters.com

Ordering Information:

Quantity sales. Special discounts are available on quantity purchases by corporations, associations, and others. For details, contact the publisher at the address above.

Printed in the United States of America

14 13 12 11 10 / 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Table of Contents

Not Like The Others

My Boy

War Story

Any Long Term Damage

The Happiness I Seek

A Good Man

The Devil In The Dim Room Lights

We Both Go Down Together

S.O.L.

Say You Love Me

Come Back To Me, To Me

Precious Insides Out

Sympathy For Redmond Waters

As A Ransom For Many

The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent; but if we can come to terms with this indifference and accept the challenges of life within the boundaries of death — however mutable man may be able to make them — our existence as a species can have genuine meaning and fulfillment. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light.

Stanley Kubrick

Not Like The Others

It was December 21, and Eve knew exactly what that meant. She was alone in her little cottage wearing a coat, scarf, and gloves while pacing back and forth in front of the warm fireplace with her hands resting underneath her pregnant belly.

Eve was 33 years old but looked like she was about to turn 50. Her hair had gone more grey than brown, and her face had been wrung to the point of wrinkles. Eve’s hands, through the years of her plight, had grown strong, but some nights she would stay up for hours running the tips of her fingers across their scars. She knew that this night one of the scars on her hands would be reopened, and she promised herself that no matter what, this would be the last night she allowed it to happen.

Tonight’s the night, and you'll be ready. This year won’t be like the other years; this year you have a plan, Eve said to herself, her voice drowned out by the whistle of the wind outside as it threw down inches of snow. She was hoping this pep talk she was giving herself would calm her nerves for the night ahead, but she was still trembling as she continued, He won’t notice the smell. You’ll just give him the poison, burn this shithole down, and you’ll be taking the last flight out of here. He won’t be able to touch you—he won’t be able to touch your baby. Not this one. Tonight's the night. And if you don’t make it … No, don’t think— Eve stopped as she heard a knocking at her door. Her visitors entered without the burden of waiting for an invitation, a flurry of snow leading their way through the cabin door.

Are you ready, Mrs.?  said Cameron in his annoying voice that Eve hated.

Is it time to wake Kris already? Where has the time gone? Why yes, dear. I’m ready, Eve replied. She said it with such confidence, no one would have suspected a malicious thought had ever passed through her malevolent mind. Eve was surrounded by Cameron, Eldar, and Nhamashal, who were her least favorite of all of Kris’ minions. She felt that it was more than duty for them. Eve felt like they enjoyed watching all the things Kris would do to her during winter, and she felt like they gained some sick pleasure out of it and loved watching the process… but none of that was true. Cameron, Eldar, and Nhamashal were no different from any of the other minions. Kris had assigned them a different task, and it wasn’t their fault. Objective thought would have been able to see that, but after all the years of torment and loss Eve had been through, objective thought was something she found hard to come by.

The group stepped outside into the harsh winter and began their walk to the southeast sector of the frozen hell that was Kris’ compound. The wind was strong and cold, with Jack Frost gnawing on Eve’s nose. Every year it would go the same way: Cameron would open the door and utter his irritating line, Nhamashal would get behind Eve and start walking, so she would be forced to move, Eldar would grab the basket full of goodies Eve was supposed to have ready for Kris, and Eve would already be wearing her go out in the snow gear by the time they entered because she knew they wouldn’t give her a moment to prepare once they were in the cottage. This year, Eve was so focused on going over her plan of escape she forgot to put on her snow boots. She was paying for this mistake with every step she took through the snow wearing her regular shoes. It was about 48 steps before her feet went numb.

The group reached Kris’ large foreboding cabin, and Cameron opened the front door. Looking inside was like looking into a black hole—cold, dark, and devoid of life. There was no reason for light or warmth. Eve had been shaking due to the cold and started shaking more due to fear once they entered the cabin. She had been through this so many times before, but it never got any easier. Cameron lit a lantern by the front door and led the way down the ominous hallway. 

Once they reached Kris’ chamber, it took all three of his minions to open the heavy door. Cameron entered first and began to light the candles in the room. Eve could see Kris’ paunchy, naked, body lying there on the bed as the candles were being lit, and she began to get nauseous. With Eldar on one side of the bed and Nhamashal on the other, the two began to chant while Cameron grabbed Eve’s hand and led her to Kris’ face. She was familiar with this part of the process and didn’t put up a fight. Standing next to Kris’ head, Cameron took out his blade that he always kept at his hip, and with his other hand he opened Kris’ mouth. Eve held her hand above Kris’ mouth in preparation, knowing that she would receive a friendly stab in the thigh if she didn’t cooperate. Last year, Eve had used her right hand, so this year she used her left, and Cameron slit her hand with his blade in the same place he always did, opening up the scar. Eldar and Nhamashal’s chanting got louder as her blood dribbled into Kris’ mouth. Kris’ eyes opened.

But don’t you want to try some of the goodies I made for you before you run off to that smelly factory with all your elves? said Eve. By this point, Kris was up and dressed in his usual crimson red panda fur suit with white polar bear fur trim. Eve continued, 277 days is a long time to spend alone without one’s husband, dear, and I did a really good job on the Bonbon cookies this year. You must try a couple before you go.

Ho-ho-ho. Mrs. Claus, you are a dear. I knew it. I knew someday you would come around, Kris said in his jolly voice. He had every intention of eating the goodies Eve had made for him before getting to work, especially the Bonbon cookies which were his favorite, but to hear her care about giving him the goodies for the first time was the sweetest treat that Kris could have received. Kris continued, jolly as ever, Cameron, didn’t I say this one was a good one, ho-ho-ho.

Yes, sir, Santa, said Cameron.

Kris sat down in his large green chair. The moment his body hit the chair, a large cloud of dust flew off of it, but Kris paid it no mind. He looked directly at Eve and tapped his hand on his knee to indicate she was meant to sit. Eve obliged him and sat on his lap.

When I first brought you to the North Pole, do you remember what you told me? I remember it. It pains me to, but I do. It haunts me in my dreams… Along with so many other things. I spend most of my days in a nightmare. You couldn’t imagine. You’d never want to, said Kris with the years of his plight festooned on every word. He continued in his jolly voice, But to see how things are between us now, my dear, my heart leaps with joy. I love this period because now we’re a team. You’ve finally come around, so we can be a team, Kris said.

Oh honey, I—, Eve began to say before she was interrupted.

Why do these Bonbon cookies smell funny Mrs.? said Eldar as he grabbed Mrs. Claus by the wrist, holding one of the cookies in his other hand.

What’s that, my dear? replied Mrs. Claus.

The Bonbon cookies, Mrs. They smell funny this year. What did you put in them? said Eldar.

My dear, I—, Mrs. Claus was interrupted once again; this time it was by Kris sliding her into the chair, grabbing Eldar by the throat, and lifting him into the air. Kris’ grip only got tighter and tighter while Eldar’s face grew red and then switched to blue. Kris knew after a few moments of strangling Eldar, that if he kept it up, Eldar would be as good as reindeer fodder, so Kris chucked him across the room. Eldar hit the wall hard, and his fall to the ground was not graceful, but the little guy did his best to get off the floor afterward and stand up straight.

Eldar, Mrs. Claus has finally come around to believing in what we’re doing here, and you interrogate her about Bonbon cookies? Never do that again, Kris said.

Eve didn’t say a word. She knew Eldar was asking the right question which was wrong for her. Eve was in luck that Kris’ temperamental personality was working in her favor for once, and she raised herself off of the large green chair and put her arms around Kris from the back.

Kris, let the poor thing be, said Eve.

Ho-ho. I lost myself for a moment there, said Kris.

Let me get those goodies for you, dear, said Eve.

I think that’s a fine idea, my sweet gumdrop. Ho-ho-ho. This is what a Mrs. Claus is best at. Putting old grumpy Santa in a better mood. I cannot tell you enough how excited… What’s that? It’s—It’s time, isn’t it? said Kris, starting jolly but ending in a serious tone. What he was referring to was the puddle that had accumulated under Eve’s feet. A look of terror covered her face as she knew that this puddle under her feet would be hurting her plans for that evening.

Cameron, Eldar, and Nhamashal dragged Eve to the birthing chamber located inside Kris’ cottage and tied her to the examination table located inside. Kris stood in the birthing chamber, watching in silence, as his minions did all the work. Cameron injected Eve with an advanced form of Misoprostol which caused her contractions to start almost immediately. About 23 minutes later, Eve gave birth to twins. She thought this pregnancy was a bit much compared to the others, but she was not expecting twins. Eve received two beautiful, healthy children: a boy and a girl.

Kris grabbed the girl and ate her without hesitation.

The boy had a different fate. Cameron placed him on the floor and injected him with a syringe full of Alvadrog, which started his transformation. Eve lay there and watched as her newborn son rolled on the floor. She could hear his bones crack through the sound of his screams. She could see his skin stretch and tear, and there was blood.

After several minutes, it was over and that beautiful, healthy baby boy Eve gave birth to minutes ago was now another one of Kris’ many elves. The hope she had from earlier that evening due to her well-thought out plans of escape left her, as she fell into a deep pit of despair. Eve figured the most reasonable thing to do in that moment would be to bite off her own tongue, so she did.

Ho-ho-ho. We shall call him… Beleg. A fine addition to the family he is. Wouldn’t you agree, boys? Ho-ho, said Kris.

Yes sir, Santa. Welcome, Beleg, said Cameron, Eldar, and Nhamashal in concert.

With a smile on his face, Kris looked over at Eve. His smile melted off his face when he noticed all of the blood painting the floor under her. Kris ran over to Eve and untied her from the table. He held Eve’s head forward with one hand to try and prevent her from choking on the blood, and he checked her pulse with the other. Kris said, in a desperate yell, Cameron, get the soldering iron. Hurry! Kris continued to speak but in a whisper only meant for Eve, My love… Why? I thought… I thought you understood. It should never end like this. Tears began to roll down Kris’ face as he held Eve in his arms. Eldar and Nhamashal stood almost as lifeless as garden gnomes, watching.

Kris saved Eve’s life. He used the soldering iron to cauterize the wound, but Cameron was unable to reattach Eve’s tongue. She had regained consciousness, but she wasn’t much for conversation. Kris did not leave Eve’s side the entire time she was unconscious, which was 22 hours and 27 minutes.

He was overtaken with joy once she woke up. My sweet gumdrop, Kris said in a mixture of glee and misery, You gave us quite the scare. No, no… Lie still. I want you to rest. We’ve given you something for the pain; don’t you worry about that. I… I always promised that someday I would make you happy here, and I will, but I feel like I’ve been failing you, and I’m sorry. Picking up Eve’s basket, Kris continued, I’ve got your goodies here. I know you meant them for me, but you deserve them, gumdrop.

Kris picked up one of the Bonbon cookies and brought it towards Eve. Eve's eyes were focused on what she knew to be poison as Kris carried it closer and closer to her mouth. She could have jerked her head away, she could have knocked it out of his hand, or she could have just kept her mouth closed, so nothing could enter. Eve did none of those things. She opened her mouth within reason, without as much as a quiver in her lips, and accepted the freedom entering her mouth.

It was December 25, and with no Mrs. Claus, Kris knew exactly what that meant. Aurora Dorff was twelve years old and had the most exceptional record for niceness on Kris’ list for a girl of her age. But most important of all, she still believed in Santa Claus. It was 12:03 a.m. when Kris woke Aurora from her bed.

Santa… Santa is that you. Oh my God! said Aurora in an excited yet half-awake voice.

Ho-ho-ho. Yes, sweetheart, it’s me. Try not to make too much noise now. We wouldn’t want to wake your parents or your little brother James in the next room there, said Kris.

Oh my God, oh my God. My friends are never going to believe this. Can I get your picture, Santa? Please, oh please. The other kids make fun of me for still believing in you, but I knew you were real. I never lost faith in you, Santa. The kids from school think all of their Christmas presents come from their parents. I’m not that stupid; I know some of the presents come from parents, but there are always presents under the tree from you, Santa. I knew it all along.

Oh, sweetheart… You’re wrong. All the presents underneath the tree for you and everyone else are put there by parents. Not a single one is from me.

What? Then why do you come if you don’t leave any presents?

I do leave presents, sweetheart, but people never get the chance to see them, and that’s alright. That is how everything is planned actually. You see, the presents I leave are for Krampus. Have you heard of him?

No. What is Krampus, and why does it take your presents?

He is my brother, sweetheart. Every Christmas he wakes to feast on the children of the world. If there are presents from my workshop located in the house of a child, Krampus will take the presents instead of the child.

That is awful. How can that be your brother?

We don’t get to choose our origins, sweetheart. Only our actions are under our control. Would you like to know why I’ve woken you?

Oh, I guess I didn’t really think about that. Why?

I must ask for your help. This is no simple request, and I cannot force you to accept it. It will come at a great cost, sweetheart, but I promise I’ll do my best to make you happy.

What is it, Santa? I’d do anything to help you. I love you, Santa.

Once they arrived at the North Pole, Aurora looked around in amazement. The way the snow danced through the breeze, the smell of pine and cinnamon in the air, and the warm glow coming from the workshop. This was her new home. Kris turned to Aurora and said, Ho-ho-ho. What do you think of it, my sweet gumdrop?

Aurora Claus replied with, I love it almost as much as I love you, Kris. I will be a good Mrs. Claus. You’ll see. I won’t be like the others. I promise!

My Boy

It will be okay, honey. They won’t find you here, said Sarah to her son. She prayed that her words would be true, but given the circumstances, her prayers weren’t likely to be answered.