Angel the Assassin

By Jane B Lee

Second in the series! Lisa begins her trans journey at 12. Her father wants his son, Larry, back; as a former military sniper, he takes Larry/Lisa to be trained by snipers. Her mother supports Lisa, from a vulnerable trans child to a strong, suc

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jane B Lee LLC
• Release date: Jan 25, 2021
• ISBN: 9781736202616

Jane B Lee

Jane B Lee is a multi-book author of adult fiction action-adventure/romance novels, a play-writer, poet, and an avid world traveler having been to over 60 countries. She has several degrees from the University of California at Long Beach and holds two patents for environmental equipment. Jane's novels revolve around strong, successful LGBTQ characters. As a transgender woman and an active member of the LGBTQ community since 1993, Jane has found her passion giving her characters the voice they deserve.

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

The Target

Lisa lay on her back in her nest; her eyes closed, and her forearm crossed over her eyes to block out as much sun as possible. Her Enfield .303 World War I British sniper’s rifle lay beside her.

God, I wish they would quit arguing and just go, Lisa repeated for the umpteenth time.

She had parked her car in the turnout just off the two-lane road on the side of the hill. She strolled up the hill, casually picking wildflowers until she had reached her preselected spot near the apex of the hill. She rolled out her canvas pad and settled into her sniper’s nest. She checked her Enfield, ensuring her scope was set to compensate for the variables of distance, wind, and drop rate, preparing for the moment that her target would appear in the exercise yard.

I’ve got one shot, she reminded herself. Master Sergeant Lipps, her dad, and all the other sergeants had driven that into her head. One shot per target. The shot would be loud and easily heard over a half-mile away. The Enfield did not have a silencer. She had to make this one-shot count; she could not take the chance of someone being able to locate from where the shot was fired.

One shot only, she thought as she rolled over, watching as her target entered the yard. Slowly, he lumbered up the steps of a three-tiered bleacher and finally settled into his personal seat in the sun, leaning against the wall behind him. Her target’s fat face came into view in her scope just as a car screeched to a stop in the turnout below her.

Damn, Lisa whispered, rolling over on her back. The sound of two car doors slamming below reached her ears, quickly followed by shouts as a man and a woman began yelling at each other. Sounds like he cheated on her, Lisa thought, not quite understanding the rage she heard in the voices below. At sixteen years old, she only had one girlfriend near her age. The Sergeants at the Lipps ranch were all older men, and there was her mother, her aunt, and Dr. Sharon. Those people were the extent of her relationships in her world.

Come on, dump him already, she whispered, checking her watch. The target is only going to be in the yard for another twenty minutes or so, she thought, impatiently waiting for the quarrelers below to quit yelling. As the yelling ceased and she heard car doors slam shut just before the car’s engine started. A moment later, they drove off. Finally! she whispered, blowing out a breath, rolling back onto her stomach.

Carefully, she positioned the Enfield and lined up her target in the crosshairs; slowly, she let out her breath and simultaneously squeezed the trigger at the very moment a bald head popped into her vision through her scope. Click-click, with practiced ease, she ejected the spent shell and sent the second round on its way.

She watched as the first bullet entered the back of the bald man’s head and exploded through his forehead, hitting her intended target in the chin. As the bald-headed man dropped away, her target’s head snapped back as the second bullet hit home, entering through his nose and painting the wall behind him with blood and gore as the bullet exited the back of his skull.

How’s that Sergeant? Lisa smiled and quickly rolled up her nest, wrapping it around the Enfield, making sure to include the ejected casing in the bundle. Nonchalantly, she walked down the hill with the bundle tucked snugly under one arm and, in the other hand, the bouquet of wildflowers she had collected earlier. Casually, she lifted the bouquet to her nose, inhaling deeply to take in the flower’s sweet fragrance. They smell so nice and clean. She thought as she reached the turnout where she had parked the car. Next to the car, she dropped to her knees and slid the bundle containing her Enfield into the compartment she had built into the undercarriage, easily concealing it. Then, with a sigh, she reached for her ponytail and removed the rubber band holding her hair back, shaking her head, letting her hair fall in place before wrapping the band around the flowers, making a lovely bouquet that she placed on the seat beside her.

Lisa turned the key in the ignition, bringing the car to life. Within moments, she was driving down the road that connected to the main road just south of Lompoc prison. When she reached the intersection, she turned south and quickly encountered a roadblock. A prison pickup truck positioned in the middle of the road blocked her progress. She waited her turn as two uniformed guards performed checks on each of the cars lined up in front of her while two police officers leaned against the fender of their police car in the northbound lane. Lisa rolled down her window as one of the guards approached her.

What are you doing here? He demanded as he leaned forward and placed his hands on the open window. Before she could answer, he held out his hand and ordered, driver’s license.

She nodded obediently and reached for her wallet on the seat next to the bouquet of flowers. Quickly she opened it and checked the license inside, making sure she had the correct one, before handing it over to the guard.

The guard glanced at the license and frowned. What are you doing way up here? Your license says you live in Corona Del Mar. That’s way south of here. He questioned, looking around the interior of the car.

Yes, well, Lisa began, deciding to take a page from the lover’s quarrel. My boyfriend and I broke up last night. I caught him cheating on me. I’m just taking a drive this morning, trying to get it together. I found a field just down the road that had these pretty wildflowers, so I picked some. That’s not illegal, is it? She asked, feigning innocence.

Please get out of the car, the guard ordered, stepping back.

Lisa did as he asked, unfolding her long slim five-foot-nine-inch body from the driver’s seat and holding down the dark green mini skirt she was wearing that accompanied the matching blouse and white Ked tennis shoes.

Motioning with his head toward the back of the car, the guard ordered, Open the trunk.

Lisa nodded and reached into the car to remove the keys from the ignition, then straightened and walked to the trunk, unlocking it and opening it, stepping back.

The guard inspected the empty trunk, pulled up the floorboard, and checked the spare tire compartment to ensure nothing was overlooked. Satisfied, he left everything lying open and slammed the trunk lid. OK over here, he snapped, looking Lisa up and down as he pointed toward the side of her car. Hands-on the roof, spread your legs.

She took orders from her sergeants all the time, so she quickly obeyed, not really understanding.

The guard approached, standing so close that she could feel the breath leaving his lips just inches from her neck as he began to search her, sliding his hands down her bare arms with a firm touch. Slowly and with steady pressure, his hands slid down to her shoulders, then around to explore her small breasts before traveling down to her waist.

Lisa almost jumped out of her skin when suddenly, a horn blared from the car behind them, drawing everyone’s attention to the woman behind the wheel shaking her finger at the guard mouthing, No, you don’t! as her horn blared in obnoxious accompaniment to her admonishment.

One of the police officers called the guard over to him. Lisa turned and watched as the two men exchanged words. Suddenly the guard turned on his heels and returned to her. Handing her license to her, he snapped, You can go. Waving her on.

Taking the license from him and she turned and smiled gratefully at the woman in the car over his shoulder, mouthing, Thank you. Quickly she climbed back in the car and drove off, anxious to put the experience behind her.

Five miles down the road, Lisa steered her car into space in a parking lot. Wow, she whispered as she focused on her trembling hands, still gripping the steering wheel tightly. With a deep sigh, she relaxed her grip and rested her head on her hands, shivering as chills ran like tiny spiders up and down her body. Damn! She exclaimed, trying to take a breath and steady herself.

This was the first time she had shot a live target; she could still see the bullet hitting her targets’ fat face and the back of the bald head that had unexpectedly popped up. Suddenly, it hit her, Two shots! She groaned; Master Sergeant won’t like that. But that was two hits, she reminded herself, her head still resting on her hands as she tried to wipe the images from her head.

I got felt up! Lisa realized, jerking her head up. Eww, she groaned in disgust as she recalled the salacious guard. He just grabbed me; he should not have done that, surprised as her nipples grew hard at the thought. It could have ended so much worse if he had managed to get just a little lower, she thought, glancing over at the flowers laying on the seat next to her. The chills she had quelled engulfed her again as she shivered, thinking, If it hadn’t been for that woman, I don’t know what might have happened.

Lisa took one last deep cleansing breath and put her car in gear, backing out of the parking space. It was time to head back to Newport Beach. Her mother had made an appointment for the two of them for that afternoon with Dr. Sharon in the lair, which was her mom’s word for the psychologists’ interrogation room.

Later that afternoon, Lisa pulled into the parking space at the doctor’s office. It was the very same parking space her mother had parked in for her first visit four years earlier. Everything was different then. She had been only twelve and had not yet found herself; back then, she didn’t even know where to begin to look.

Lisa looked at her watch, noticing that there was still an hour before her appointment. Exhausted, she sighed and looked at the bouquet of wildflowers next to her, realizing they were the only energy left in the car. Leaning back, closing her eyes, as she fell asleep, her thoughts took her back to the time four years earlier, a time that had been painful, exposed, confused, and embarrassing. A time before, she knew Lisa; a time before she even had a name, a time when she was still a he.

CHAPTER 2

The Lair

Four Years Earlier

Larry! Larry! Are you listening to me? Larry! Gale’s voice penetrated her twelve-year-old son’s bubble.

Yes, Mom. Larry turned from looking out the car window as they pulled into the parking place.

You know why we’re here? You know? Gale pushed for an answer.

Yes, Mom, Larry answered with a sigh.

So, tell me. Gale insisted. Tell me!

Because I was wearing Elizabeth’s clothes, Larry answered with his head down and eyes shut. Hoping all this would go away.

And! Gale pushed again.

And her make-up. Larry’s eyes still closed. His head down even further.

And! Gale pushed yet again.

And because I had longer hair then. And I had it styled. Larry paused as he looked up, his eyes open with a small smile. Beautifully.

Oh, God, Larry. Gale let out a big breath and gripped the steering wheel with both hands. She was looking to heaven for help.

Gale looked sideways at Larry as she still firmly gripped the steering wheel. Then she took another deep breath. Oh, Larry.

She missed her little boy. She reached over and ran her fingers along his three-week-old crew cut. Wrapping her hand around his neck, loving him as if it were the day he was born. She pulled him against her and kissed him on the head.

Larry scrunched up his body, not expecting the sudden burst of affection.

She slowly pulled back, Larry, look at me! This is important! Turning his head to look into his eyes. OK, Larry. Here’s the thing. You do not, I said, you do NOT, have to share anything with me that you tell the Doctor. A quick second later added. Unless you want to.

Larry pulled away, not understanding what was happening. Then, taking Larry by the chin and turning his head and eyes toward her, But. If he yells at you, you need to tell me. And If he hits you or even looks like he’s going to hit you. You have to tell me.

Larry nodded.

Got it, Larry! You got it. Right? She searched his eyes for understanding.

Yes, Mom. A confused Larry responded.

Gale took Larry’s hand as if he was still a four-year-old child. Leading him into the building and taking the elevator to the third floor and down the hall to room 324. Taking a deep breath, Gale opened the door and guided Larry into the receptionist area.

The reception area had a dozen chairs, or so, four doors with names slid into slots. Most of the signs started with Dr. The receptionist sat behind a wall with a sliding glass window.

Gale filled out the three-page form the receptionist handed her.

Larry sat quietly in his chair as the minutes passed, his protective bubble slowly formed. The bubble protected the girl, not from Larry, but from the real truth. The real truth was the real world.

OK. The Doctor will see you now. The second door. The receptionist pointed to a door some forty minutes after they entered the room.

Doctor Schmidt opened the door and met them at the entrance to the interrogation room.

Well, It’s Gale, isn’t it? Doctor Schmidt added quickly, not giving Gale a chance to answer. I’m Doctor Schmidt. Extending his hand for a quick and very light handshake.

This is a preliminary, you know, meeting. I’m just going to ask, you know, a few questions of looking down at his notes. Of Larry. It’s Larry, right. Not giving anyone else room to talk. So, Larry, Identity. Looking at Gale. So, Identity. My guess is, you know, Larry is going through a, you know, and Identity crisis.

Looking directly at Larry. Boy or girl is the usual Identity crisis.

And apprehensive, Gale pulled Larry closer to her side. This Doctor Schmidt made her uncomfortable.

OK, then. The Doctor quickly added. This should only take, you know, about thirty minutes. Just preliminary, you know.

Gale. Would you please take a seat in the waiting room? Placing his hand on Larry’s back parting mother from child. Larry and I are going to, you know, get to know each other.

You and I will, he began to close the door in Gale’s face. You know, have a discussion afterward. OK? Finally, closing the door.

He directed Larry to the sofa next to his chair. He was studying Larry for more than a few uncomfortable minutes.

So, are you a boy or a girl?

What? Larry fidgeted defensibly on the sofa. What was he asking? What? he said again.

Not a good answer. The Doctor shook his head. Once again, are you a B-O-Y or G-I-R-L? Spelling out the words.

What? Larry was confused, to say the least. He was not expecting that question. It simply did not register.

Don’t say what again. For the last time, are you a B-O-Y or G-I-R-L? once more, spelling out boy and girl.

Larry directed his eyes to the neutral space called the floor. I’m a boy.

Are you sure? Are you wearing girls’ panties.? The Doctor asked directly.

No, was Larry’s single quiet word response.

Do you have girls’ panties? The Doctor persistent on the panty thing.

No, Larry repeated again.

Are you sure? Do you have any girls’ clothing? The Doctor persisted.

For the first time in weeks, Larry was angry. I said I don’t have any. Larry started soft but ended loud.

Did you throw them away? the Doctor made a note on his pad.

Larry’s face turned red, his voice shaking, he nearly yelled.

Yes. All of it. Then shouting, panties, bra’s, skirts, pantyhose, blouses, dresses. Even lipstick. The admission shook her body as the girl came to the surface. Red-faced, body shaking, fist clenched. The girl yelled, Everything. Everything. Satisfied! Everything.

The Doctor looked down at his pad, writing something. He said without looking up. We call that purging. The Doctor felt like he had made some progress; he looked up and began another line of questioning. But it was too late.

The girl had already ducked behind the bubble. Larry turned away, crossing his arms. For the rest of the session, Larry was not communitive. He was not listening. He was not responding. His mind was stuck in a funky fog. He was not hearing, not thinking … only feeling. Larry was feeling like he was falling. He never heard of anyone else with what they were calling an identity problem, a boy wanting to be a girl. He was a freak, and now everyone knew it.

Larry had not even noticed that the Doctor had got up and had called Gale to the room.

Larry. Would you please go sit in the, you know, waiting room? Larry’s foggy mind was not there. Larry. Did you hear me? Larry looked up for the first time since the girl’s outburst. Larry saw his mother and felt like he was being rescued at sea. Somehow, he got off the sofa. He wanted his mother so bad, as he came close to her, the Doctor put his hand in the middle of Larry’s back and pushed him past his mother into the waiting room and closed the door.

Larry was left standing alone in a room with several future patients. They all seemed to be looking at him with, in what he felt was disgust.

As the door closed, the Doctor said, Ma’am, Gale, right? Your son has an identity problem. He’s not sure if he’s a, you know, boy or a girl. The Doctor paused, Looking at Gale. Now, I can help him. I’ve dealt with this, you know, problem many times before. However, he’s a bit old to have this, you know, problem. He lied. But given a few weeks, you know, I can straighten him out. He lied again.

Same time next week. But, you know, no paperwork. So, we’ll start at four. It will be a fifty-minute session. I find that it works best. Besides, he thought, that fits right into the hole in his schedule, leaving Wednesday afternoon open for golf.

The Doctor opened the door, and with a sweep of the hand, gestured Gale out of the room. Gale stepped through the door and turned to the Doctor. She was trying to think of how to ask him how it went in a way that didn’t seem like prying.

Any questions? A slight pause. Then next week. And the door closed.

Gale was standing, looking at the closed door. She scrunched up her nose and mouthed the words. You know. This man irritated her. Turning, she collected Larry from the chair closest to the door. Larry, let’s go get some dessert, leading Larry out of the wolves den.

Just across the street was The Newport Center shopping mall. A short walk from the psyche building. Next to the entry was The Brio Restaurant. Gale pointed to a remote booth and asked the receptionist if they could sit there.

What would you like for dessert? Gale asked in hopes of lightening up the moment.

Nothing. I’m not hungry. Larry nearly whispered.

I’ll order for you, Gale said, trying to lighten the moment.

Larry only looked away.

Waitress, a scoop of vanilla ice cream with whipped cream, chocolate, nuts, and a cherry on top. She then ordered her own dessert, a dirty martini, which she felt she deserved.

With the waitress out of hearing range, Gale leaned in and asked softly. OK, Larry, do you want to tell me anything?

Larry looked away, fidgeting in his seat. Gale let him collect his thoughts.

Anything? Gale asked. Doctor, ‘You Know,’ he didn’t do anything we talked about, did he?

No, Larry said quietly.

He didn’t. Gale started again.

Larry, in a loud whisper, cut in. He didn’t do anything. He didn’t hit me or make me cry. He didn’t do anything.

For the rest of the dessert, Gale talked about anything but the wolves’ den.

Gale finished her dirty martini while Larry nibbled around the edges of the melting ice cream. He did not finish his dessert.

***

For the next few days, Larry was numb. He felt like everyone knew he was disgusting. He felt like everyone was looking at him, judging him as weird or worse. He did not speak much. He did not answer many questions. He only gave body gestures. He felt small and wanted to hide.

Monday night, after dinner, he went to bed early. From the shelf behind his bed, he took out a book entitled Diary. He had gotten it a few years earlier as a birthday present. It had only one entry. I got a shirt, a hat for sailing, and roller skates. And this book.

He opened it up and flipped it to the next page. He wrote, Am I a boy or a girl? The one question he remembered from Thursday’s inquisition. He had been thinking about that a lot.

He next wrote down something else he had been thinking about the last few days. The question Doctor, ‘You Know,’ should have asked but didn’t. The words just now came into his mind. He spelled them out. Who do you like best?

He closed the diary and closed his eyes. He knew he missed his girls’ clothing. He knew he missed dressing for his friend Chris. Chris was Elizabeth’s brother. It was her clothing he was wearing when they got caught. He fell asleep, trying to think why and if he liked the girl better than Larry.

Wednesday night, he sat on the side of his bed. Diary in hand. If I was a girl, what name would I have? She never had a name around Chris. Just sweetie or you or, and this made her happiest, Girl.

Without much thought, she wrote down, Lisa. She didn’t think about it much. It just came to her. She then printed LISA. Then in a feminine, curvy hand, wrote, Lisa. She then said it aloud but quietly so no one else in the house could hear. Lisa. Then again, Lisa. Lisa. Lisa. I like that. she nodded her head.

The name Lisa had just come to her, handed to her. As if from a baptism or a christening. It was a name she would carry for the rest of her life. A name picked for her by the spirits.

In his dreams that night, she came to him. She kissed him on the forehead. Then on the lips breathing herself into what was now her. Lisa, she whispered. I like that. Thank you for giving me life. Lisa slowly woke up. She smiled and got out of bed, finding her silk nighty. Dropping her cotton pajamas to the floor, she slipped the nighty on and slid back into bed and fell into a peaceful sleep. Peaceful for the first time in days.

***

Thursday at four came quickly. Gale picked Larry up at school; they drove silently to the shrink hotel.

After dropping Larry off in room 324, Gale walked across the street to the Brio. Sitting at the bar, she ordered a dirty martini. She laid her watch out on the bar and timed herself to leave in twenty-five minutes.

Her thoughts were entirely on Larry. What can she do to make him happy again? Would he really be happier as a girl? What can I do? she asked herself softly over and over again. She did not have an answer. She only knew she hated the solemn, mirthless child Larry had become. She had to get the happy, talkative, funny child back she had given birth to. Even if that meant he was a she.

***

Larry was ready for the doctor You Know this time. So, Larry, you know. Looking over his notes. A full minute later, he asked. So, Larry, you know, are you a boy or a girl?

Larry answered, looking the Doctor directly in his eyes. What would you like me to be? A B-O-Y or a G-I-R-L? Larry spelled it out just as the Doctor had done the week before.

Doctor, ‘You Know,’ quickly replied. Smartass. I ask the questions here!

Larry kept his eyes on the Doctor. The Doctor only glanced at Larry, then down at his notes.

The Doctor studied his notes for a full minute. The Doctor looked up and asked. Who’s Chris? The question surprised Larry and put the Doctor back in control.

He was my friend, Larry answered, his eyes turned down again. He gave up control to the Doctor. How did he know about Chris?

Was? Not anymore? Why? the Doctor asked. He’s gone. That was all Larry could say.

Did Chris dress in girl’s clothes? The Doctor probed. No! Larry quickly answered.

Was he your boyfriend? The Doctor probed even deeper.

Yes, Larry answered without deciphering the meaning of the word, Boyfriend.

Did you kiss him? the Doctor was leaning forward.

No! Larry said firmly.

Did you masturbate with him? Another probing question.

No! Larry said at once. He was shocked that anyone would ask that or would even use that word.

You know you’re a boy. You know you can masturbate. Do you masturbate? The Doctor continued tearing down Larry.

Larry went silent. All the Doctor’s other questions about Chris and their relationship went unanswered.

The Doctor studied Larry for a full minute. Then he decided that now was the time. Suddenly, the Doctor reached between Larry’s" legs and squeezed his penis and balls.

These say you’re a boy. Stroking them a little longer.

You can play with them when you want. Do you want to now? You can, you know. You can now if you like. It won’t bother me. The Doctor had a small smile on his face.

Larry was in shock. He looked down at the Doctor’s hand on his balls. Looking up, Larry pushed his hand away. No one had ever touched his private parts. He sat, looking at the Doctor’s smile. Larry began to shake. He turned white.

The Doctor started another line of questioning. Larry started to get up. The Doctor pushed him back in his seat. What do you think happened here? the Doctor said, looking Larry in the eyes. Whatever you think happened. Didn’t happen. The Doctor sat back, feeling he was in full control.

The Doctor looked down at his notes and began to write something. Larry sprang up quickly this time and darted for the door. The Doctor reached for him, missing, he started after him. But Larry was out the door, looking for his mother. She was nowhere to be seen. He turned, facing the Doctor in the door of the interrogation room.

The Doctor took a step towards him. Larry panicked and ran out the door. Reaching the stairway, he ran down all three floors to the ground floor.

Gales twenty-five minutes were up, and she had just left Brio. She stepped into the elevator, just missing Larry coming down the stairs.

Larry crashed out the doors into the parking lot. Seeing their car, he rushed to it. The car was locked.

Gale opened the door to the den to see an excited receptionist, with the Doctor trying to calm her down. The receptionist pointed to the door. Larry just ran out. You must have just missed him.

The Doctor said. I’m sure he’s just a bit over-excited. He is probably just downstairs.

It only took a half-second for Gale to react. Shit, what happened, was all she could say as she ran out the door, her head twisting in all directions, looking everywhere. She ran down the stairs, all three flights in record time, checking all the nooks and under the stairs as she took the steps two at a time.

Larry, looking behind him, was afraid the Doctor was after him. He had started after him, reaching for him when he darted out of the lair. Larry began to run down the street. He thought he was running towards his home. But he was going in the wrong direction.

Gale came out the doors throwing them wide open.

Larry! Larry! She called, looking frantically up and down the street and across to the mall parking lot. God, help me. Where is he? at the top of her voice, she again yelled.

Larry! Larry! She started running, looking in all directions. Where the hell is he, Larry! She called out again. She ran toward the corner. She just got a glimpse of him turning on to McArthur Boulevard. One of the business highways in Corona Del Mar. She ran after him full speed calling his name as she turned on to McArthur. She heard the squeal of brakes. Larry had run into the street and came to a full stop in front of a white pickup truck.

The other cars on the street behind the pickup truck had come to a short but full stop. Larry was Looking at the truck’s grill, frozen in terror.

Larry! She yelled out at the top of her voice. She ran up, yelling, Larry! every few feet. Larry did not move. Frozen. As she reached him, he was still frozen, not looking away from the pickup truck. The honking horns just increased his fear. She picked him up and carried him back to the sidewalk. The driver in the pickup truck yelled. God damn it, Lady. Watch your kid. He scared the shit out of me. And the pickup drove off.

Gale kneeled beside Larry, quickly checking him over for blood or injuries. He looked at her, in sudden recognition, threw his arms around her. The tears and sobs now came. He was frightened, but now that mom was here. He could let it all out.

Gale held him tight, giving kisses to his head and face. Oh, thank God you’re OK. She said more than once. She said. OK, honey. I’ve got you. Your OK now. Come on. OK? They both were still shaking as she wrapped her arm around him. Larry sat quietly in the car with his seat belt buckled. Gale was behind the wheel, gripping it with both hands. She had not started the car. Looking up, then across to Larry, they both were still shaking.

What happened, Larry? Larry just began to sob again. Reaching over for him, she touched his head, then rubbed his shoulders. It’s alright. But you have to tell me what happened? Did the Doctor do something? Please, Larry. She begged. Larry just kept his head down. Now, quietly sobbing. Well, I’m going to find out. She opened her car door. Larry grabbed her arm, pulling her to keep her from getting out of the car.

Please, mom. Please don’t, Larry begged with his eyes. Then, tell me. She sat back and closed the door.

Can we go home now? Please. I just want to go home. Please, mom. Larry was now holding her arm with both hands.

OK. OK. Just. OK. OK. Then you’ll tell me. Then you got to tell me, She had only concern for her son. Larry let go of her arm. Gale reluctantly started the engine.

The car had hardly come to a stop in the driveway when Larry jumped out. He ran to the front door; he turned, facing the corner between the front door and the porch wall; he was too ashamed to look his mother in the eyes.

It’s alright, honey, we’re home. As Gale opened the door, Larry darted through and ran to his room. She knew she had to take control of the situation, following the sound of the slamming door down the hall. She tapped on his door and opened it. Larry was lying face down on his bed.

Honey. She sat beside him, her hand on his back. Honey, I love you more than anything. I really do. She paused. No matter what. She paused again. She tapped him on the back. Come on, honey. Sit up. Sit up here.

Patting the side of the bed next to her. Come on, honey.

Larry struggled around, twisting his body to the sitting position next to his mother. Holding him close, she started again. Larry. I love you more than anything. Kissing his head. No matter what. No matter what you do or what you did. I love you. She tilted his head, so she was looking into his eyes. This is important. I love you, no matter if you’re a boy or a girl. I will always love you.

Larry wrapped his arms around his mother and held on tight. Tears were running down his cheeks, landing on her breasts. Just as Larry was starting to loosen up, they heard the front door open. Larry immediately stiffened up.

It’s only Daddy. Stay here. I’ll take care of this. She kissed him on the forehead. On her way out, she gave him the quiet sign, putting her finger to her lips. Marv. She said, walking up the hall, hugging her husband. Larry is very distraught.

What happened? He was at the shrink today. Wasn’t he? Marvin questioned Gale.

Yes. I don’t know what happened. It’s bad. I’m just getting Larry calmed down. Looking over her shoulder towards Larry’s room. I need to find out what’s going on. I’m frightened for him. I’m afraid he’ll do something stupid again.

Again? Marvin asked a little loud.

Shush. I’ll tell you all about it. But. Gale was pleading with Marvin.

But what? Marvin pressed.

But, I need time with just him. Can you maybe go over to your sister’s house? Take her to dinner and maybe a movie? She was holding both of Marvin’s hands and looking into his eyes for understanding.

OK. Not happy. But, OK. Marvin kissed her. He was picking up his keys and opened the door.

Oh. And can you order a pizza to be delivered? Gale called after Marvin.

What kind? He called back, stepping out the door. Garbage pizza. That’s what Larry likes. Gale called out.

Marvin turned just outside the door. I love him too, you know. Tell him I love him too. Marvin paused. Tell him, I always will.

We have the house to ourselves tonight, Larry. Nothing to worry about. Gale sat down beside him. Larry had calmed down and was now sitting quietly on the bed.

Now. I know I told you that you didn’t have to tell me anything unless you wanted to. But. Gale said, looking intently into Larry’s eyes. But that all changed today.

Larry turned away. OK, sweetie. We got time. So, let’s take it slow. Patting his knee. So, to get things started. In the beginning, everything had to do with you dressing in Elsbeth’s clothes. You like dressing like a girl. So that’s why we went to the Doctor, Right? What can you tell me about that? Gale turned it over to Larry.

Larry did not answer.

OK, then. Tell me about the night, well, that night all this started with Chris’s house? Still no answer. When did you start dressing in Elsbeth’s clothes? Gale was looking for some response, anything at all.

After she left for college. She’s just my size, except for her shoes. You know she has big feet. Larry laughed a little, his head still down.

Yea, I noticed that myself, Gale said. Did you only dress in Elsbeth’s clothes when Pat and Judy went to one of their Hollywood parties?

Yes. Came the one-word answer.

What did Chris think?

I don’t know? Larry took a breath.

What did you and Chris do? I mean, all that time together, did you dress up? Gale was getting in deeper.

Nothing. I dressed. Chris learned to smoke. I cooked dinner. I cleaned up. We watched Television. Larry started getting the drift, looking up quickly, he said. We didn’t do anything. We didn’t even hold hands. Nothing, mom.

So, you’re telling me you were like Ward and June Cleaver in the Leave it to Beaver TV show? No touching, no kissing, and Chris smoked? Gale asked.

Yes! Larry said, looking at his mother. He sat quietly.

They both sat, wondering what to say next. Finally, Larry spoke up. I like being a girl. But I like doing some of the things boys do. I’m all screwed up. Larry started.

Did the doctor tell you that you were screwed up? Gale asked.

No. Not that way. I guess I figured that out for myself.

Larry was speaking what he thought.

So, what were you thinking after all that stuff, after Dr. You know, first session? I mean, what did you think about the rest of the week. You were very quiet all week. Gale was relieved that Larry was showing some trust in her.

Larry leaned over, taking his diary out of his headboard. He held it for a few seconds, wondering what his mother would think of some of his inner thoughts. He finally handed it over. Gale flipped through the pages, then thinking a minute. Reread it slowly this time.

So, where did you hide your clothes? Gale said as she laid down the diary. Larry got up and walked over to his closet. He lifted one of the floorboards, exposing his hiding place.

Gale got up to inspect the empty space. Just then, the doorbell rang. Larry jumped.

Pizza! Gale said with a smile in her voice. Let’s eat, Gale said, heading for the door. Well, come on. She waved him out of his bedroom door. Over pizza, Gale said. You liked the name, Lisa. Right?

Larry stopped in mid-bite. He did not know what to make of this. He just felt like he got her name. Was mom making fun of her? Of her new name?

I love you if you’re a boy or a girl. And right now, I love you as a boy and a girl. Taking a second, Gale continued, and, I think it would help me to start thinking of you like a girl if I call you Lisa. Just when we’re alone, and you want to be a girl. Looking across the table. OK, Lisa. Lisa was coming back to life, sitting across the dining table. Gale leaned in, now, Lisa, you have to tell me about today, OK? What happened?

Larry took a breath, Doctor You Know," asked me if I masturbated in front of