My Country God's Country

By Charles Lynn Russell

My Country-God's Country continues the story of the joy, disappointments, and challenges Eric Sager confronts as he grows to manhood on the hundred-thousand-acre ranch of his grandparents, Gavin and Luta Sager. His transition from self-centered teenager to a responsible young man is slow yet guided by Feather Jackson, the aggressive and vivaciou

• Language: English
• Publisher: Charles Russell
• Release date: Oct 12, 2020
• ISBN: 9781636842066

Book preview

2

FRANK

Graduation ended a successful school year. I was sitting in my office Saturday morning with my feet propped up on my massive desk and a smile on my smug face—self-congratulations. My first full year as superintendent couldn’t have gone any better. The board was looking for direction. As a result, they followed my recommendations. My contract was extended with a substantial salary increase.

I reminisced and gloated about our success. Achievement memories floated forward like bubbles blown through a hoop. In football and basketball, we won the district championships. We were respectable in the other sports. Most impressive, we’d placed second again in the State One-Act Play Contest. Teachers had responded in a positive manner to my expectations, and to date—due to retirements—we only had to fill a couple of vacancies.

All doubts about moving my family to this remote area had disappeared. We relocated into the larger house—reserved for the superintendent—which contained three bedrooms and two baths. Julie received two promotions at the bank and was now a loan officer, admitting it was the best job she’d ever held. Her salary was comparable to a first-year teacher’s.

Riley experienced a great year and was scheduled to attend Texas Tech in the fall. She and Bruce were still dating and, of course, her choice to attend Tech reflected that. Bruce raced home at every chance, but it didn’t concern Julie and me. Most of the time they were separated by several hundred miles. Attending college, she would be studying with limited opportunities for Bruce.

Most encouraging was the change in Aubrey after the incident when she attended a party in Alpine without our permission and came home drunk. She suffered greatly at the hands of her classmates and realized her mistake. Now she was more reasonable about boys and certainly more selective in her company. She’d been voted Freshman Class Favorite, a complete turnaround from the eighth grade year ridicule.

The phone interrupted my bliss. What’re you doing in your office? It’s Saturday and school is out. One thing about it—I always know where to find you. I thought today we might celebrate and do something special.

I knew my wife already had something in mind. What would you like to do?

Oh, maybe go to Midland, do some shopping and eat out. Possibly take in a movie. What do you think?

Sounds good. Like I had a choice. Anyway, she deserved it.

It’s going to be me and you, like the old days. Riley’s with Bruce and Aubrey’s spending the day with a friend.

I glanced at the watch the staff presented me at Christmas. What time do you want to leave?

I can be ready in half an hour. Why don’t you come home and put on your boots and jeans? Look like you live West of the Pecos. We might buy you a cowboy hat today.

Sure. Be there shortly. I was not comfortable wearing jeans and boots. It was not my style. What was my style? Nerd clothes, I answered my own question. Maybe she would agree on a compromise. I could wear my Dockers without a belt and tennis shoes.

---

We spent a beautiful day in Midland doing what Julie loved—shopping. Thank goodness, Julie didn’t insist on the cowboy hat, but I did agree to several flannel shirts on sale due to the season. After a late lunch, we saw, Every Which Way but Loose with Clint Eastwood, one of my favorite actors. They say you like people who are unlike yourself. Probably true.

It was six o’clock before the movie was over, and we started home immediately, knowing the girls, or at least Aubrey, would be home. Julie was in a talkative mood.

Frank, what was the turning point? I mean when everything started getting better for us?

That’s easy. When Luta Sager was elected to the school board. Everything changed. Of course, Loughton left and the board became a legitimate governing body. The difference was daylight and dark.

Remember how apprehensive you were about coming out here in this remote area and taking a job? How you doubted yourself? Now look. Everything worked out for the best. You made the right decision.

Right, but you never doubted the move. Not many wives would’ve had your attitude. I’m fortunate to have married you, in more ways than one.

She moved over next to me. Works both ways.

The drive seemed short, and we were home by dark. Aubrey was waiting on us. Y’all have fun? Her beautiful face reflected some mischief.

Yes. We shopped, ate out, and went to a movie. Your dad bought three flannel shirts. He looks good in them. Like he could go out in the forest and cut down a tree.

Riley called just before you came in and said to tell you she’d be late getting home. She’s having dinner tonight with Bruce and his parents.

Did she say how late it would be? Julie asked.

No. She’s just going to be late.

Aubrey went to her room to read. Another positive event. Her choice was mostly romance novels, which didn’t bother us. The fact she was reading thrilled us.

When did this happen, Frank?

What’s that?

Not needing permission to stay out late. Telling rather than asking. I’m not sure I like it.

She’s eighteen after all, Julie. Riley has always been responsible and used good judgment. It might be time we gave her more freedom.

Maybe so, but it would be nice if it came more gradual. She’s not going to see Bruce every day this summer. I expect her to get a job of some kind and earn spending money for college, even if it’s babysitting.

We’re fortunate she’s developed into the young lady that she is. We must’ve done something right, I said, intervening on Riley’s behalf.

You’re right. Maybe I dread her growing up.

We dropped the subject of our elder daughter and spent the remainder of the evening watching television and visiting about the wonderful year we’d experienced. Individual events shot up like popcorn heated in a pan with the lid off—pure celebration.

I usually woke up at least twice during the night. Sometimes I’d be able to go back to sleep and other times that wouldn’t be the case. I was wide awake when noticing the clock beside my bed said two o’clock. I went to the kitchen for a glass of milk, and habit caused me to look in on Aubrey who had gone to sleep with the light on. I turned off her reading lamp and went to Riley’s room. It was dark, but the light from the doorway revealed an undisturbed, empty bed. Well, it served me right for mouthing off to Julie about giving her more freedom.

I sat down in the den, turned on the television and waited. At a few minutes after three Julie joined me asking, Should we call the Loughtons and see if she’s there?

I don’t know. I hate to call at this time of night. Let’s wait ’til four and maybe she’ll be home by then. I couldn’t believe she’d worry us like this. She probably thought she could sneak in.

At 3:55 lights appeared in our driveway. She didn’t seem surprised to find us waiting for her when she entered, sitting down in a chair facing us.

Julie wasn’t able to hide her anger. Why’re you so late? Didn’t you know we would be worried?

Bruce and I were talking and time got away from us. I’m glad you’re up. I have something to tell you. You may be upset with me, but we’ve made up our minds. Looking right at us she continued, We’re going to get married very soon. You’re probably going to be disappointed, but please try to understand. I love him.

We sat in stunned silence unable to speak as she continued. He’s not returning to college, and I’m not leaving him. We want to get married immediately. I hope you’re not angry.

Julie found her voice before I did. Why can’t you wait, Riley? Go to college for a year, and make sure this is the right decision. You’ve just completed high school and have your entire life ahead of you. You will not regret it, I assure you. Surely Bruce understands what you’ll be sacrificing.

Riley sat up straighter, with a determined look I’d seen in her mother so many times. No. Bruce loves me and wants to get married immediately. We’ve talked about it each time he came home from college. We’re going to live on the ranch, and he’ll work for his dad. We’ve made up our minds and nothing you say or do will stop us.

I finally came out of my trance. Has Bruce told his parents about your plans? They may not approve either.

We told his mother, and she was pleased. He’s going to tell his dad today. Bruce and his dad have been getting along much better this past year.

Could it be because he was away at college? I submitted sarcastically.

Bruce thinks he and his dad can work together. His mother assured us she’s going to stand up to him and support us. I know he’s a bully and unreasonable. I know you don’t like him, for good reason, but you won’t be around him. It’s my life, and I’m going to spend it with Bruce.

Julie’s surprise and frustration turned to a higher level. I always thought this would be a conversation we’d be having with Aubrey. This isn’t like you, Riley. You’ve always been reasonable and respected your dad and me. Now you’re defiant and telling us what you’re going to do even though it’s against our wishes. Your dad and I want what’s best for you. And this isn’t it. You’re not hearing what we’re saying.

Riley slumped, gazing downward, followed by an awkward silence. Eventually, she mumbled an explanation answering her mother’s confusion. I was hoping you would accept my decision, but that’s not going to happen. I’m so sorry to disappoint you. She started sobbing but her next sentence, even though barely audible, brought clarity. I’m pregnant.

---

The wedding was scheduled two weeks later on the second day of June at the Presbyterian Church with Pastor Jacob officiating. Julie recovered before I did. I lived in shock. My beautiful, perfect daughter was going to have to get married. I couldn’t talk about it—an impossibility. A week before the event Julie asked me my opinion about an issue involving the reception, and I attempted to change the subject.

I flinched at the anger in her response. Frank, she’s getting married and going to have a baby. Accept it! It does no good moping around feeling like she’s let you down. We love her, and we’ll come to love Bruce and our grandchild. Maybe not Slade Loughton, but that doesn’t matter.

Aren’t you the least bit disappointed? I refuted.

Sure, I’m human. However, we can’t change anything. What’s done is done. We have to move on.

Doesn’t it concern you, Julie, the entire community will be talking? They all will know why they’re getting married.

Frank Mendenhall! If that’s what’s bothering you, maybe you’re not the knight in shining armor I thought you were. I could care less about what people are thinking. We’re better than that. Riley is still our little girl, and we’re going to protect and love her just as we always have.

Now I felt like a heel. She was right. I couldn’t imagine my little girl getting married and having a baby. My next thought gave me something else to consider. . . having Sunday dinner at my new in-laws.

3

ERIC

Iwas on my way back to Ruidoso. Dawn had cried when I left, causing me to feel guilty. Maybe Feather was right saying I needed to stay at the ranch. Too late now. I’d made my decision allowing me to be with Feather the entire summer. I managed my conscience by promising myself I’d return to the ranch occasionally to help. They could hire additional hands to replace me. I thought of being able to spend every day with Feather and smiled.

I stopped in Valentine, filled up with gas, and bought a sweet roll for breakfast. I’d left early without eating, anxious to get on the road. The morning was cool, and getting out and stretching, I felt good. Why wouldn’t I? By early this afternoon I’d be with my girl. She was still bossy, but it made me want to please her even more. When she demonstrated affection in public, it embarrassed me but also gave me confidence. Why did it take so long for me to see how beautiful she was? Maybe beautiful wasn’t the correct word. Exciting was a better description—full of life and unpredictable.

Two and a half hours later, I went around El Paso without stopping and was at the track in Ruidoso a little before one o’clock. After I explained to security my purpose for being there, they motioned me through. No one was at the barn, but Jimmy appeared within a short period of time—taller than me and much thinner with a dark complexion—all cowboy even though he was an Indian. I’d become acquainted with him on my earlier visits.

You made it, Eric. I’ve been expecting you. How was your trip? He grasped my right hand.

Good. No problems. Where’s Feather? I asked, raking my hand through my mussed hair.

He looked toward the track. "She’s exercising a horse for another barn. She stays busy. We ride our horses early in the morning, but she usually rides at least half a dozen other horses during the day.

I’ll show you your living accommodations. They’re not much, but Tom and Bob wanted someone at the barn full time. We have some nice two-year olds that show a lot of promise. Two are entered in the All American, and they want someone here all the time.

Not much was a generous description. The tack room had a cot, one light, a small electric heater, a fan, hot plate, and a tiny refrigerator. I’d brought my weights but there was no place for them. I assumed Jimmy knew what was going through my mind.

The track café is a short walk, and they have bathrooms. Of course, I use a stall most of the time. I’m sure Feather will let you use her shower where she’s living. I know it’s not much, but the pay is good, and you’ll not find better men to work for than Bob and Tom.

Jimmy then took me through my other responsibilities—cleaning the six stalls, feed rations for each horse, checking and cleaning the water troughs, and washing and grooming the horses after their workouts. It was obvious I was going to stay busy at least for half a day.

The track café is not bad, but you’ll get tired of it. There are several decent places to eat in town. The hot plate works good, and you can keep your fridge stocked. Do you have any questions?

No, guess not. I had questions but was afraid they might sound negative. I hadn’t imagined anything like this when I accepted the job. At least, I could be with Feather most of the day.

I have to be going now. We’re breaking several of the colts that matured late, which we’ll start next year. Eric, we’re glad to have you as part of our team. You’ll like it here. We’re working for a special family who’ll treat you right.

After he left, I inspected my living quarters again, not finding it any larger. I was trying to decide where to put my clothes when she called my name. I stepped outside, and she jumped into my arms wrapping her legs around me—the room wasn’t so bad.

---

My alarm went off at 5:00 the next morning, but I was already awake, shivering from the cold. It was supposed to be summer. I rose, turned on my electric heater, and dressed. The clothes on my makeshift hanger were not adequate for this morning. Failing to bring my heavy coat, I improvised by putting on two shirts and a sweater.

On my way to the track café, I walked briskly hoping to warm up. The smell of coffee greeted me as I walked through the door. The café was already half full with trainers and exercise riders preparing for an early start. I sat there, basking in the warmth, drinking my coffee with my mind wandering. I was happy with just the slightest guilt over leaving Gavin and Dawn. The welcome from Feather vanquished any doubt. We’d spent the remainder of the evening talking about the summer.

I was hoping the dreams would cease after I left the ranch. Maybe being out of their room would help. The dreams came at least once a week, and I’d accepted the fact it was the twins. I thought of sharing my dreams with Dawn or even Gavin but decided against it. The dreams frightened me at first but had become more of a nuisance—always waking me. I had trouble going back to sleep, trying to decide their meaning. Sometimes it seemed they were trying to tell me something. Other times they made no sense.

My plate arrived and, impressed, I started in on the large piece of thick sliced ham and the eggs, which were fried perfectly. The large biscuits topped off a great breakfast.

When I walked up to the barn, Feather was standing beside the first stall with her hands on her hips with the look I dreaded. You haven’t fed. They need to be fed before I ride them. Didn’t Jimmy tell you it was the first thing to do in the morning?

I hesitated, trying to come up with an explanation. I went to eat breakfast and was going to feed first thing after that.

It’s after six, and I should be on the track now. The later it gets the more crowded it becomes. Horses come first—you eat after they do.

I’d messed up my first day, and she was mad. I hurried to the feed bin to fill the buckets but she wasn’t finished. Now it’s going to be late when I finish with our horses and has messed up my schedule for the entire day. Jimmy always has everything done by now and a horse saddled for me.

Well, I’m not Jimmy. I glared. Give me a little time to adjust to my duties and everything will be fine.

She smiled. I’m sorry, Eric. You need to understand. I have a busy day. You’ll do better tomorrow. Let me help you feed, and we’ll get this show on the road.

Within half an hour, we had her first horse saddled and I gave her a leg up. She rode off toward the track. I went over to a chair beside my living quarters and sat down. Taking a deep breath, I wondered if this was going to be worth spending time with her.

---

The next few days I established a work routine and didn’t get scolded by the Little Boss again. I would rise at five, feed the horses, hurry to breakfast, return and saddle her horse before she arrived. After she left, I would clean the vacant stall. When she returned, the next saddled horse awaited while I put her mount on the hot walker. Rinse and repeat until our horses were finished.

Jimmy would show up early and accompany her to the track to watch the workout. I spent a great deal of time with him, and his knowledge of horses was amazing. Not a day passed I didn’t learn from watching and listening. He was patient and took the time to explain what he was doing. I learned to wrap ankles and what to look for in the way of trouble signs indicating an injury.

Tommie Rose was at the barn most days and followed Feather everywhere. She would walk behind her to the track and return with her when she finished. I didn’t mind her being around. She was mature beyond her seven years and could carry on a conversation comparable to an adult. I don’t know the reason, but her dad made me uneasy. Jimmy had told me what a great athlete Bo was and how he’d led a college to a Division II National Championship. He was friendly and gave me no reason to be uncomfortable. Some days her mother, Lexie, would pick her up in the afternoon. She was beautiful and nice as well. Several days she brought me leftovers from their noon meal.

Tom or Bob or sometimes both came by for a few minutes nearly every day. Invariably, they would ask me if I needed anything. Jimmy’s statement about them being a special family was right on.

Beginning the second week, Jimmy had me pony a two-year-old stud to the track Feather was riding. He was unruly and full of himself. He’d warned me repeatedly to be careful handling the stud. He’d kick as well as bite and was unpredictable, especially when a mare was around.

I was comfortable riding Glo, Feather’s horse, thanks to the hours spent in the saddle at the ranch. Feather was actually complimentary. I was impressed at how she could ride the small exercise saddle and totally amazed at her ability to stay in a jockey saddle.

Finished with my chores by noon, I usually ate lunch alone since she was still riding other horses. Like Jimmy had predicted, the track café lost its appeal sooner than expected. I’d go to town for a burger or something else from a fast food place and bring it back to the barn. Jimmy had told me, in no uncertain terms, someone needed to be at the barn day and night. My weight stayed about the same, but not working out made me aware I’d need to be careful.

Feather was usually finished with her day by five o’clock. She’d go to her house and get cleaned up and bring our supper back to the barn. After eating she’d remain at the barn while I went to her house to shower. By the time I returned, we had little time together since we both had to be up early the next morning.

After the first week, all my clothes were dirty. I asked Feather to stay at the barn while I went into town to a washateria.

Bundle up your dirty clothes, and I’ll take them home with me tonight and wash them.

I’d rather wash my own clothes.

Why? Luta washed your clothes, didn’t she? She had her hands on her hips with that look.

Yeah, I guess.

What do you mean, ‘I guess?’ You know she did.

Uh—I just feel better doing my own. How was I going to get out of this?

Eric Sager! You don’t want me to wash your dirty underwear. Right? I washed all of Pop’s clothes.

It’s better if I wash my own clothes, I mumbled.

Oh me. What am I going to do with you? I tell you what. I’ll put my dirty underwear with your dirty underwear and wash them together. I won’t even look at your skid marks.

Okay. Why did she have to be so bold? I’d never get used to it.

---

I’d talked with Gavin and Luta twice since coming to Ruidoso. They still hadn’t found full-time help. Luis had been out a couple of times to day work, but he’d been employed for the summer by the ranch where his dad worked. Luta said they’d been working from daylight to dark and were exhausted. She confessed they wouldn’t be able to hold up much longer.

Both times after the call ended, I felt bad. However, the guilt was not strong enough to cause me to return. I was enjoying working at the track and was stunned when Jimmy brought me my check for the first week, which was for $400. I never dreamed of making so much money. Also, the work wasn’t that hard during the week, and the weekends were exciting watching Feather win race after race. When she rode a winner from our barn the second weekend, Jimmy let me hold the mare for the win picture. I couldn’t ever remember feeling so important.

4

FRANK

The week of the wedding, I was a wreck. I ate very little and slept less. Julie’s frustration with me eventually turned to anger. I couldn’t get past the fact my little girl was getting married and was pregnant. Where had I failed as a parent? She had been a perfect daughter, and now this.

Originally, it was going to be a small wedding—wrong. The first meeting between Nadine, Bruce’s mother, and Julie changed that. It went from small—to medium—to large—to let’s invite everyone. I think the idea was to get everything out in the open, making it legitimate. I knew better than to convey my thoughts to Julie.

Of course, there was a rehearsal dinner hosted by one of the Loughtons’ friends in town. The meal was served in a huge backyard, which was large enough for me to avoid Slade. People kept coming up and congratulating me like I’d done something. Champagne was served, and I drank two glasses, which was the most alcohol I’d ever consumed. I felt better for a short while before developing a headache. I’ve never seen so much food, which made me nauseated. After what seemed like hours, we thanked the host and left.

I asked Julie to drive. I drank two glasses of champagne. Did you drink any?

Three glasses. It was delicious. I can’t believe you drank. That’s not like you.

Celebrating, I guess. It’s not every day you get to associate with Slade Loughton.

Now you’re being ugly, Frank. Get over it.

Why’d she get pregnant, Julie? Couldn’t they have waited?

She pulled up into our driveway, turned off the car, and looked at me. Did we wait, Frank? Maybe you’ve forgotten; it’s been so long.

Well, uh-I-uh, that was different.

I wish you could see yourself, Frank. A thirty-eight-year old man blushing over being reminded of his courtship days. They’re young and in love like we were. If I remember right you were a willing participant in our courting days.

All right, I give up. You’re right. I’m taking it personal, but I can’t help it. She’s always been a Daddy’s girl and now she’s not.

Oh, Frank. She still loves you. You’ll see and be sorry you felt like she let you down. Trust me. What’s done is done. Everything will be all right.

I want to believe you, Julie, but right now, at this moment, it’s difficult. That was the understatement of the year.

---

The day of the wedding arrived—the longest day of my life. I tried to work in my office on the budget, but it was hopeless. The wedding dominated my thoughts. I just wanted it over.

My door was closed when Mrs. Kraal knocked, peeked in and said, Someone to see you, Mr. Mendenhall. I’d moved Mrs. Kraal to the superintendent’s office as my secretary and replaced her at the high school with the former superintendent’s secretary.

Sure. I needed a distraction. Maybe it would be a complaint and my focus would shift. Riley walked through the door. My heart started pounding. We’d avoided one another since she gave us the news.

Daddy, are you busy?

No, not much. Looking at next year’s budget.

Could we talk?

Sure. Big day for you. Nervous?

I’m terrified. She sat down with a serious expression I’d seen so many times over trivial events which meant nothing. It always amused me before, but now it frightened me.

Rehearsal went well. The ceremony should also, I said.

The wedding itself doesn’t worry me. What terrifies me is losing your respect. You’re disappointed in me. I’m afraid of losing your approval forever. You see me as letting you down and making a horrible mistake. There’s something you need to know. What I love most about Bruce is that he reminds me of you. He’s honest, solid, dependable, compassionate, and forgiving. He’s everything I love about you.

I couldn’t respond. I sat there, overcome with emotion. Finally, I rose, went around my desk and hugged my little girl. Thank you, Riley. I’m going to try.

---

Walking Riley down the aisle, my legs were weak and didn’t seem to want to work. Finally, we reached the front of the church. I barely heard the pastor ask, Who gives this woman? What woman? I wanted to scream, she’s just a little girl. It came out as I’d rehearsed a thousand times. Her mother and I.

I made it back to my seat. Julie took my hand and squeezed it. I took several deep breaths trying to control my emotions, but tears started rolling down my cheeks. I reached for a tissue in my coat pocket, angry at my lack of control. I glanced over at Slade Loughton, and he was smiling. The dirty son-of-a. . . . I stopped before completing my thought.

I tried not to listen to the vows, looking around the church. It was full with some standing at the back of the chapel. Of course, Bruce’s family filled most of the seats. I concentrated on a wasp buzzing around, wondering if it was going to land on someone. Then I noticed one of the groom’s ties was crooked. It might’ve been the first time he’d worn a tie. I closed my eyes and took several deep breaths, slowly exhaling. Then came the pastor’s words, I now pronounce you man and wife. It was over.

Pastor Jacob announced there would be a reception in the school cafeteria and everyone was invited. I loosened my tie to breathe easier. If I could just get out of here and inhale some fresh air. I stood up and that’s the last thing I remember.

Is he breathing? Check his pulse. Does anyone know CPR? The voice seemed to come from a distant place. I opened my eyes and some stranger was right in my face. Looks like he fainted. Probably too much for him. Give him some room.

I’d passed out. Great. I attempted to rise but was dizzy and sat back down on the floor. Julie was on her knees, holding to my arm. With her help, I was able to rise. Still shaky, she guided me back up the aisle and outside. She headed us in our car’s direction. Where’re we going?

Home, to let you lie down for a while, she answered.

I stopped. But what about the pictures and reception?

She pulled me forward. They can do without us.

Arriving at home, I was able to walk into the house without assistance. I lay down on the couch and tried not to think of what’d happened. I’d collapsed in front of everyone. Riley must be totally embarrassed. I’d ruined her wedding. I closed my eyes and tried to think of a worse time in my life.

How do you feel? Julie asked.

Terrible. I ruined the wedding.

She sat down beside me on the couch and took my hand. Oh, Frank. The wedding was over when you fainted. I was frightened out of my mind. I thought you’d had a stroke or heart attack. I’m thankful you’re okay—nothing else matters.

But what will people think?

When did you start worrying about what people think? I don’t care. We’re who we are, and we’ve never apologized for that. It surprised me when you were concerned about people talking about Riley being pregnant before she married. That’s not like you. Now, if you’re feeling better, we’re going to the reception. Riley and Aubrey will be worried about you.

I agreed but with little enthusiasm. We walked across to the school cafeteria which was already crowded. Julie stayed close, probably thinking I might faint again. Riley and Aubrey came over immediately when they spotted us. Daddy, are you okay? asked Riley.

Yes. I’m sorry for becoming the center of attention. I guess the stress was too much, and my body shut down.

I’m glad it was only stress. It was scary, she said, hugging me. Could I get you some punch and cake?

I’ll take care of it, Aubrey volunteered. This is your party.

Bruce was the next to ask about my health. I felt small in his presence. I didn’t realize he was so large. He was courteous, and guilt hit me immediately. He was a good boy and would be a fine husband. We talked for a few minutes about his first year in college, and I began to feel better. The chance to enjoy my improvement ended abruptly when Bruce’s dad approached us. You’re looking better, Mendenhall. I thought you were a goner when you fell. Looked like a coronary to me. He ended the comment with a chuckle. I noticed Bruce ducked his head. Thank goodness, Riley and Aubrey had left. I didn’t know how to respond. While I desperately searched for a smart reply, he turned and walked away.

"I’m sorry, Mr. Mendenhall. That’s just the way he is. I don’t know whether Riley has told you or not, but we’re living twenty miles further south on the ranch. It’s an older house and was the original headquarters built by my great-granddad. I’ll manage the part of the ranch which we call the Grande due to the fact it’s the largest section. We run 750 mother cows on the Grande. We’ve agreed on a salary plus a bonus, depending on the market when we sell the calves.

I’m under no illusion about my dad, Mr. Mendenhall. The one thing in my favor is the fact we’ll not be around him very often. If it doesn’t work out, then I’ll look for employment elsewhere. My mother has promised to be stronger in standing up to him. I wish he’d change but that’s not probable. It’s important for you to understand I’ll take care of Riley. She’s the most important thing in my life. She’ll be the central focus of every decision I make.

Listening to him, I felt better. I’d known he was a good boy from high school and respected by everyone. Maybe I had forgotten with the news we’d received two weeks ago. It wouldn’t be easy for him, working for his dad, but I believed he was sincere with everything he told me.

Thank you, Bruce. I needed to hear those words.

One last thing, Mr. Mendenhall. If it’s a boy we’ve already settled on a name. . . Jeffery Frank. If it’s a girl. . . Julie Kay. He turned and walked away, leaving me stunned and humbled.

---

Sunday morning, they were in church. Riley was beautiful and Bruce was handsome. A feeling of pride flooded my thoughts but was not sufficient to drown out my guilt. We learned later they had gone to Midland for a one-night honeymoon but returned for church.

After church they invited Julie, Aubrey, and me to go with them to inspect their new home. We had lunch in town before leaving, and I wasn’t the least bit concerned about what people were saying.

5

LUTA

We had a board meeting on Monday, the fifth of June. They generally lasted less than two hours and this was no exception. I felt sorry for Mr. Mendenhall. He was not his usual self, and I assumed the reason was the rumors. If they were true, his daughter and Slade Loughton’s son had to get married. Of course, most people knew of the conflict between Slade and Mr. Mendenhall. I still found it awkward to call him Frank because he was so professional. At times I would’ve liked to tell him to loosen up and enjoy himself.

I always carried a satchel for any handouts, and after the meeting ended I pretended to be busy organizing it until the rest of the board members had left. I asked him how he was doing.

Is it that obvious? Not great.

I’m sure it’ll get better. Riley’s a wonderful girl, and Bruce is a special young man. I’ve known his family for years. Slade is an exception.

Mrs. Sager, it’s not just the family she’s marrying into. I wanted her to attend college, get a degree, and choose a profession. She has such potential—academic and social. I’ve never known a more caring person. She’ll have to depend on her husband to provide for her and who knows if the marriage will last. I keep thinking Slade will interfere.

"First, let’s get something straight. I’m determined to call you Frank. I want you to call me Luta. Now I understand where you’re coming from. However, don’t underestimate Riley and Bruce. They love each other and will overcome anything Slade can throw at them. Also, you and Julie will give them support and understanding. Personally, I can’t see it not proving to be a successful marriage.

I’m going to come right at you and, please understand, it’s not meant to be disrespectful or mean. You’ve heard of Gavin’s and my loss. I would give anything to have the problem you do. You’re wishing this wouldn’t have happened. Stop and think if you’d never see Riley again—you’d think of her every day but not be able to hug her or tell her you love her—you would visit her grave and find it impossible to hold back the tears. If faith can carry me through my grief and sorrow, surely it will be sufficient to handle your problems.

I know you’re right. Julie has been on my case, too.

I need to be going. Gavin will be looking for me. I left him staring off into space, hopefully digesting my words.

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We’d had moisture in the spring but it’d turned off hot earlier than usual. I accompanied Gavin most days and did what I could to help. He was limited as to how much physical effort he could put into any task. With 400 cows and many having calves we had our hands full. We kept supplements out and, in order to keep them coming to the pickup horn, would put out cubes twice a week. With heavy rains in the spring, water gaps or places where the fence crossed a gulley were in need of repair as well as fencing. The ranch had been neglected for years, and the result was going to require endless work.

We were exhausted at the end of each day and usually were in bed early. We were happy doing what we loved but finding dependable help seemed impossible.

Eric called at the end of his first week in Ruidoso, excited about watching Feather win several more races. He asked how we were doing, and I didn’t try to hide our frustration about the workload. I continued to hope he would see the