Time To Fly: Breaking Free From Stuck Behaviors and Soaring Towards an All-Around Healthier You

By Ruth Pierce

Years ago author Ruth Pierce found herself stagnating. Certain behaviors kept her stuck. She did not realize how equally important the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects were both in breaking free and in creating a safe environment for growth that helped her learn to fly. But today is a different story.  Today she is soaring

• Language: English
• Publisher: Author Academy Elite
• Release date: Dec 1, 2017
• ISBN: 9781640850101

Ruth Pierce

Ruth Pierce resides in Kansas with her husband of forty years. She is an author, coach, and speaker who passionately develops people so they can soar towards their potential. She feels like she was stuck for so many years. She learned these lessons the hard way. She wants to help others become unstuck and fly with their potential. Her passion is developing people. This passion combines her two seemly opposite careers of math education and human resources.

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Time to Fly

Breaking Free from Stuck Behaviors and Soaring toward an All-Around Healthier You

Ruth Pierce

Copyright @ 2017 Ruth Pierce

All rights reserved.

Printed in the Unites States of America

Published by Author Academy Elite

P.O. Box 43, Powell, OH 43035

www.AuthorAcademyElite.com

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Paperback ISBN- 978-1-943526-97-0

Hardcover ISBN- 978-1-943526-96-3

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016915583

This book is dedicated to all of those who have been instrumental in my personal growth journey.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Contents

Foreword

Introduction

My Hero’s Journey

Understanding How You Are Made

Unable to Fly—The Eight Stuck Behaviors

First Stuck Behavior—Unhealthy Ways to Find Love and Acceptance

Second Stuck Behavior—Undesirable BED Fellows—Blame, Excuses, and Denial

Third Stuck Behavior—Unhealthy Perceptions of Problems

Fourth Stuck Behavior—Unprocessed Pain Buried Deep Within

Fifth Stuck Behavior—Unresolved Root Issues

Sixth Stuck Behavior—Uncontrolled Fear

Seventh Stuck Behavior—Unforgiveness Anchor

Eighth Stuck Behavior—Unhealthy Relationships

Learning to Fly—Eight Safe Flying Behaviors

First Safe Flying Behavior—Create and Maintain a Safe Environment

Second Safe Flying Behavior—Maintain Assertive and Interdependent Relationships

Third Safe Flying Behavior—Recognize that Good and Bad Coexist

Fourth Safe Flying Behavior—Be a Student of Yourself

Fifth Safe Flying Behavior—Make Deposits and Not Withdrawals

Sixth Safe Flying Behavior—Take Consistent and Calculated Risks

Seventh Safe Flying Lesson—Cultivate Growth Relationships

Eighth Safe Flying Lesson—Make Your Dreams a Reality

Conclusion

Blank Hero’s Journey

Notes

About the Author

Foreword

When I engaged with Ruth Pierce, I saw someone who wanted to fly, but did not quite know how to go about it. I first met Ruth as a participant in one of my coaching programs, the Deeper Path Cohort. It was fun to watch her gain more clarity as she authored her OPUS, her personal plan of becoming a master in the art of living.

From there she participated in another coaching program, Your Secret Name, where she found her new name, Chosen. She no longer needed to worry about being pushed aside by others—her biggest fear that kept her from reaching her potential.

And now I have watched her gain clarity through writing her first book, Time to Fly. Sometimes she appears to take two steps forward and one step back, but she keeps going, the sign of a true overcomer. She knows what has kept her stuck for so many years and she wants to help others get unstuck as well. She knows the type of environment needed to sustain personal growth and she shares this freely as well.

Using the four areas of physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional as a backdrop, Time to Fly provides eight steps how to get unstuck and create an environment that is conducive for personal and professional growth.

As you read this book, you will develop a deep sense of self-awareness for how you may be:

Using unhealthy ways to find love and acceptance

Perceiving problems in an unhealthy manner

Allowing unprocessed pain lead to unresolved root issues

And her framework will help you take your growth to new heights by discovering how to:

Develop assertive and interdependent relationships

Make deposits, not withdrawals, in all areas of your life

Take calculated risks to reach your goals

Come fly alongside Ruth as she helps you travel toward your potential.

Kary Oberbrunner

Author of ELIXIR Project, Day Job to Dream Job, The Deeper Path, and Your Secret Name

Introduction

You probably wondered why you picked up this book. Why would you want to fly with me? I used to be stuck:

Feeling unworthy;

Feeling like no one truly cared about my needs and desires;

Feeling like I was always giving and no one appreciated it;

Knowing that my behavior was not always what it needed to be, but not knowing how to change it.

Does any of this resonate with you?

My church upbringing would say repent and turn it over to Jesus, and always put others’ needs before your own. While there is truth in that, it is not the whole truth.

I have been on a quest of personal growth for almost twenty years now. It has become my compass. Have I left my church upbringing behind? No, I have not. I have, however, integrated biblical and assertive relational skills into the process.

I have taken the time to learn about myself. Part of what I learned I liked, and part I did not. I learned that I was passive rather than assertive, and that was NOT a good thing. I learned that I was a pleaser. I became a pleaser to prevent others from pushing me aside, but it did not work. Even though I felt like I was always giving (and giving and giving), no one else saw it this way. What they remembered were the times my passiveness became passive-aggressive (and it will). They remembered me as being selfish. This is not at all how I wanted to be perceived.

I learned to be myself, with my personal strengths and weaknesses. That does not mean that I do not continue to try to improve, but I recognize what I am naturally good at and what I am not.

I am ready to fly.

I would like to provide you with an inside look on how I am learning to process hurts and problems in appropriate ways. This book gives many of the key components that I wished I had learned years ago. I share it with you in hopes that it will ring true for you as well. The book will have two storylines—mine and yours.

The book is divided into two sections. The first part looks at eight Stuck and Unable to Fly Behaviors. These are the ones that kept me stuck. I have also seen these in working with others. I encourage you to take an honest and courageous look at yourself as well. If you have picked up this book, you are among an elite group of people who are willing to take the hard steps necessary for personal growth. For this, I congratulate you!

The second section presents eight Safe Flying Behaviors, necessary for personal growth. These were and still are all part of my personal growth path. This section will take your personal growth to the next level;

Where do you want to go?

What do you want to do?

How do you know what path in the sky you want to fly?

How are you going to get there?

The Conclusion is a challenge to both you and me. The open blue sky is unlimited. My time to fly is now. I am ready to see how high and how far I can go. How far and how high do you want to go? Are you ready to fly?

My Hero’s Journey

Before we dig in, let’s talk about the Hero’s Journey. It is a template where an ordinary person takes a little risk into the unknown, and through a series of successes and failures, eventually returns to his or her previous world a different person because of these experiences.

Most movies and novels follow a certain framework called the hero’s journey. Our lives follow a similar journey. I promised you that this book would have two storylines—mine and yours. Below is how my personal growth fit into the hero’s journey, along with the divisions of this book. I encourage you, as we go through each section, to think about your own personal growth journey. At the end of the book, there is a place for you to chart yours as well.

Stuck and Unable to Fly Behaviors

The Ordinary World—Limited Awareness of the Problem

The life I lived was very small. Certain behaviors and feelings were expected of me. In many ways, my church told me what to think and feel. I felt my family did the same. My life was status quo and I did very little risk-taking.

The Call to Adventure—Increased Awareness of Need to Change

My call to adventure started when I was asked to step out of my comfort zone and develop some small trainings or studies. These were baby steps.

Refusal of the Call—Fear, Resistance to Change

I didn’t think I was adequate or good enough. I was convinced I would fail.

Meeting with the Mentor—Overcoming Fear

Various mentors have crossed my path, but the first one that really looked deep and saw my pain was a special friend. She saw my pain and also my potential—potential I did not even know I had. She shoved me forward on my personal and professional growth path.

Learning to Fly with Safe Flying Behaviors

Crossing the Threshold—Committing to Change

I made the commitment to work on personal growth. I started learning about assertive behavior and finding out my strengths. I began to discover why I often reacted the way I did.

Tests, Allies, and Enemies—Experiencing with New Conditions

Various tests came along. Not all my family and friends agreed with this new direction I was taking, but some of them did and cheered me on. With the tests, I sometimes failed and would go backwards for a while.

Approach—Preparing for Major Change

Up until this time, I had grown primarily through books. I grew substantially; however, there was no interaction with others. Four years ago, that all changed when I jumped onboard with my first online coaching webinar.

The Ordeal—Big Changes with Feelings of Life and Death

My big ordeal was committing to writing a book and developing a coaching program around what I had learned so that I could help others.

The Reward—Accepting Consequences of a New Life

I’m continuing to soar towards my potential. I’m developing as an author and coach, helping others become unstuck and soar with their potential. I’m training others so they don’t remain stuck as I was.

The Road Back—New Challenge and Rededication

Will this be without challenges and tests? No. Will I always succeed the first time? No. However, it is okay if there are dips along the way, as long as the overall projection is upwards; it is okay to have dips—just like the stock market.

The Resurrection—Final Attempt and Last Minute Dangers

I encounter tests regularly. Some of this comes through rejection by some of my message. They are disinterested, thinking that talking about feelings and emotions are not necessary. Others think that this message is against biblical teaching.

Return of the Elixir—Mastery

I’m embracing mastery by taking others through a successful coaching experience.

Understanding How You Are Made