Confessions of the Spoonkiller

By Shanon Cox Clay

This is all straight out of my journal, as it was written. Mostly funny, some serious, and some not for the faint of heart. If you’re offended by bad behavior and worse language, then you’re probably reading the wrong book. Consider that your warning and my disclaimer.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Jan 7, 2015
• ISBN: 9781312817142

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Confessions of the Spoonkiller

Confessions of the Spoonkiller

More Excerpts from a Functioning Idiot

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Insert Title Here: Excerpts from a Functioning Idiot

Confessions of the Spoonkiller

More Excerpts from a Functioning Idiot

Shanon Cox Clay

2014

Copyright © 2014 by Shanon Cox Clay

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review or scholarly journal.

First Printing: 2014

ISBN 978-1-312-81714-2

Shanon Cox Clay

48 Main St

Senoia, GA 30276

[e-mail]

Dedication

June 30, 2013

For MikeyB

I wanted to do something special for you.  Just a Thank You for being the awesome person that you are, for being there when I needed a friend, and for giving me a much needed, and amazingly beautiful, break from the world.  The sticker pictures gave me the idea to start this journal of where the WWMBD bracelet goes.  It stays on the motorcycle, well, there is one on each bike.  Maybe it’s crazy, but maybe you’ll be interested in following it’s journey while it’s with me.

Til the next road trip,

Shanon

Contents

Confessions of the Spoonkiller

Acknowledgements

Introduction

June 22, 2013~ Nellie Yeoman

June 29, 2013 ~ Nations of Patriots

June 30, 2013 ~ Dually in Macon

July 14, 2013 ~ SPC Hilda Clayton

July 19, 2013 ~ Mental Health Day

July 20, 2013 ~ William Mitiu

July 21, 2013

July 26, 2013 ~ Michael Schlitz

July 27, 2013 ~ Brown’s Mill Battlefield

August 24, 2013 ~ PirateCon

August 25, 2013 ~ Dannie Merritt

September 3, 2013 ~ Tread Softly

September 8, 2013 ~ Doc Holliday

September 11, 2013 ~ 9/11

September 22, 2013 ~ The Grotto

October 7, 2013 ~ Senoia and the Mary Jane

October 30, 2013 ~ Straight to Hell

November 5, 2013 ~ Be Thankful

November 6, 2013 ~ Losing our History

November 9, 2013 ~ Robert Gordon

November 11, 2013 ~ Veterans’ Day Parade

November 14, 2013 ~ Blue Painters Tape

November 23, 2013 ~ Dad and his Ranger

November 26, 2013 ~ Starbucks

December 7, 2013 ~ The Packrat

February 4, 2014 ~ Viva Las Vegas

April 3, 2014 ~ The Traveling Class Ring

April 11, 2014 ~ Creepy Neighbor

April 13, 2014 ~ Greenville Street Park

April 14, 2014 ~ SGT Scotty Roberson

April 30, 2014 ~ Grief Takes Time

May 23, 2014 ~ SGT Mike Stokely

May 25, 2014 ~ Bill Humble

May 31, 2014 ~ Nicotine Nabber

June 19, 2014 ~ I Don’t Want to Smoke

October 29, 2014 ~ 10 Rules of the Warrior

December 10, 2014 ~ Strength and Passion

December 11, 2014 ~ Alone in the Crowd

December 11, 2014 ~ My Eagle

December 12, 2014 ~ The Light After the Dark

Epilogue

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank everyone who helped contribute to this book.

Those who let me interview and/or use a submission:

William Mitiu

Michael Schlitz

Robbi Schlitz

Daniel Merritt

Robert Gordon

Renee Aun

Jeff Carroll

Tyler Merritt

Geff Davey

Dan Callahan

Cody Jackson

Bill Ross

Those who ride with me through this crazy world of mine, my Bomber Girls LRC:

Cindy Miz Hashaw

Angela Private Hell Roundy

Becky Jerzey Bradley

Julie Stormy Lee

TerryLynn Shady Newsome

Brenda Budgirl Coleman

Cathy Kitty Cushway

Stephanie Longtime Lucas

A special thank you to my Mom and Dad, Deborah Stickney, and Eddie Mason, without whom I would probably still be sitting at the table trying to think of a title.

And everyone who stood by me, pushed me, and supported me in this and every endeavor I have undertaken.

Introduction

The story of the Spoonkiller is really two or three stories intertwined.

A few years ago, Cin and I rode up to the Smokeout in North Carolina.  We stopped for lunch at a Popeyes Chicken.  The only other people in the joint was a family of four.  They were very loudly, not nicely, talking about us.  What our sexual preferences must be, how we must be lacking Jesus in our lives, etc, etc.  So, of course, we went and sat next to them.  We were, loudly, joking around about the cutlery available, which was sporks.  Cin waves a spork at me, and I start saying I’m afraid of sporks.  That spoons were alright, but forks were aggressive and dangerous, and sporks were an abomination, etc. etc.  We joke around until the family leaves.

Later, Cin and I are relating this story to a mutual friend, while her 12 year old son runs around the motorcycle shop.  A couple of months later, same friend and son come in the shop.  The son has a friend with him; they had just left karate class.  The son decides to start jabbing at me, and I roll him into a ball on the floor and start tickling him.  The friend starts to come to the rescue and the son says, NO!  Man, she’ll kill you with a spoon!!  I heard the story!!

Now, how he got killing with a spoon from the spork story is anyone’s guess, but that is how the name Spoonkiller came about.

Welcome to the second installment of stories from my random life.

June 22, 2013~ Nellie Yeoman

Today we rode down to Geneva, GA for the grand opening of the B4 – Bad Bikes, Babes and Bullets store front.  Luckily, Nellie Yeoman was in the store helping out.

Nellie is an Explosion Detection Dog, who was working with security teams in Iraq and Afghanistan.  She was injured while searching a truck at the U.S. Consulate, which earned her the Bomber Girl Purple Heart Collar she wears in her photos.  Her handler discovered a growth on her, and through the Army Vets at Bagram AFB, it was discovered she had cancer.  One of the security team members adopted her and sent her back stateside, where, after chemotherapy, Auburn University has now declared Nellie cancer free.  She spends her time running around a farm, and is now The Boss at B4.  This was my first time meeting Nellie, after years of hearing stories from the guys about her, and saying she is a loving dog is quite an understatement.  Although she was recovering from an incident with another dog, she still made her rounds with all the visitors, even half laying in my lap at one point to get a better rub down.  It was quite a pleasure to meet a Military Working Dog, and see that her retirement suits her quite well.

June 29, 2013 ~ Nations of Patriots

The Nations of Patriots Tour asked the Bomber Girls to receive and escort the traveling flag from Savannah Harley-Davidson down to Golden Isles Harley-Davidson in Brunswick.

The Nation of Patriots was formed to provide financial support to the families of wounded men and women that volunteered their lives in the preservation, protection and future of The United States and all of its citizens.  Every year The Nation of Patriots organizes a National effort that pays tribute to, and honors, all of America’s Armed Forces – Past, Present and Fallen.  Every year we ride for the members of our military – to show America’s support, our thanks and our united pride by passing one American flag throughout the country.  It’s the very foundation of this symbol and all it represents that our brave men and women in the military have stood and died defending, continue to stand and protect, and will forever fight for.

-From The Nation of Patriots website

We met the escort from Charleston, SC at Savannah HD for a short ceremony passing custody of the flag and accompanying journal to Jerzey.  Savannah HD displayed the flag and poster until the escort the next day. 

Left to Right: Cin, TerryLynn, Sonny Dixon, myself, Jerzey, Lexye

After the ceremony, Cin and I rolled over to see the new Veterans’ Park in Bloomingdale, GA.  It features a multisided monolith, one side for each branch of service, with engraved name plaques for every local veteran.  There is also an eternal flame on top of the monolith, and the park is paved with engraved bricks of donors who helped make the park possible.

June 30, 2013 ~ Dually in Macon

Today is the actual escort of the Nation of Patriots Flag to Brunswick.  The parking lot was already crowded when we arrived; and final count was 150 bikes rolling down Hwy 17 to Golden Isles HD.

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Our entry in the journal accompanying the flag:

We consider it a great honor and privilege to be part of the Nation of Patriots Tour, and to escort this flag from Savannah HD to Golden Isles HD.  We do this in honor of all that have served as warriors to protect our freedoms and our country.  We thank those that have served before, we are grateful to those serving now, and we remember those that gave all.  Support our troops, support their families, our Heroes are important to us.

The rain held off most of the way, as I rode beside Jerzey leading the pack.  After a short ceremony handing the flag of to the next escort, it was time to hit the road back home to Atlanta.

Side Note:Dear guy in the white dually in Macon tonight; as much as I appreciate the outpouring of support by your interior light on and thumbs up… pacing me, at night, in the rain, on the interstate, in a construction zone, with standing water on the cross graded road surface almost made me shit myself.  There was a reason I was slowing down.  I was sliding all over the place and you were scaring the hell out of me.  Yes, I saw you keep your thumbs up for a while when you finally decided to speed off.   I mean, sort of blurry like and panic hazed, through the monsoon caliber tidal wave of water you threw on me, under my helmet visor and all over my glasses.  ‘Preciated that… the thumbs up really helped.  Just sayin’…

July 14, 2013 ~ SPC Hilda Clayton

Saturday night, around 11 pm, I received the email inviting the Bomber Girls to participate in a dignified transfer for SPC Hilda Clayton in Augusta, GA.  As the correspondence explained, a dignified transfer is escorting the fallen hero from the Angel Flight to the funeral home.  Even though it has been raining like Noah moved next door, I knew this was something I had to do. So at o’dark thirty the next morning, allowing myself travel time as well as wait-the-rain-out time, I loaded up the bike and started my 3 hour journey to the Augusta Regional Airport.

The weather was mostly kind, and I arrived in plenty of time to meet Jerzey and the CVMA.  40 or so motorcycles showed up, which is quite an impressive sight.  As our safety briefing and instructions came to a close, Pointman spoke about the SPC.  He really brought this young, courageous, driven female soldier to life for all of us. 

We stood at the tarmac fence as the plane arrived.  Since I have begun walking down this path of military support, I have attended many memorials, funeral processions and dedications.  None of that prepared me for the moment when the flag draped coffin came into sight.  And as Pointman said from behind me, up to this point, the family has only been told they lost a loved one.  This is the moment they first see her, the moment they KNOW she is gone, the raw emotion in the air was almost touchable.  I could feel all of the veterans surrounding the area come to attention and salute as the honor guard brought SPC Clayton to her loved ones, gently placing her in the hearse.  As we walked to the bikes, I could see each person walking a little slower, head hanging a little lower.  Tears rolled down my face for this young lady I didn’t even know, for each face every one of those veterans and civilians were remembering.  As we went through the streets, following this brave young woman and her family, people were lining the curbs.  I saw old men saluting, flags being held, mothers and fathers holding their young children, holding little flags, whispering in their ears.

And I thought, despite reality TV and an entitled swath of our citizenship, this is the future that will bring us through, that will guard our gates, that will be our nation’s strength and courage. 

Afterward, as we sat at lunch next to a couple, both service members in WWII, who had buried two of their own sons in service to our country, the tears welled up again.

This was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever done, and I will do it all over again tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow if need be, I owe them at least that much.

Godspeed SPC Hilda Clayton.

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July 19, 2013 ~ Mental Health Day

Nothing special to report here other than a mental health day, tanks of gas, and miles and miles of road….

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July 20, 2013 ~ William Mitiu

I took off this morning for Stone Mountain.  I spent the afternoon living the rock star lifestyle, hanging out with Hot Rod Walt and the Psycho Devilles, Garage 71 radio and the Reverend Andy, and getting a few pics for Nine Line Apparel in their clothing. 

Later that evening, we all hauled over to the Dixie Tavern for another live show and filming of 3 live videos for the Psycho Devilles.  I was sitting with the crew, shivering, since the ride from one place to another had been an hour and a half of solid rain, plus the air in the club was cool enough to hang meat in.  I borrowed a pair of jeans from one of the actresses, and that made it tolerable enough to pay attention to what was going on with the filming.  It was interesting watching the setup of cameras, microphones and lighting.  A little boring to hear the same song played 3 times for different camera angles and crowd shots, but all in all, not a bad way to spend a Saturday night.

One of the film crew was Will Mitiu, retired 1st Sergeant, Special Forces 7th group, and wounded combat veteran.  As he talked about his military days, looking off into the distance, a cigarette clenched in the side of his mouth, I could see the crusty old first sergeant in him.  Despite the mechanic’s shirt, cuffed jeans and greased back hair, the air of battle helmets, cigars and growled out orders hovered around him.

"We were hit by a car bomb in ’07.  I spent a year at Walter Reed, and another year at Fort Benning recovery.  I was place on temporary medical retirement for a year and a half before they officially retired