Yesterday & Tomorrow

By Robin Buckallew

Cassandra Wilcox didn't believe in the devil. When Beelzebub showed up in her life, it seemed harmless enough to play along for a time. Then things started to happen, strange things that Cassie couldn't explain. What seemed like a harmless flirtation becomes a struggle to survive as Cassie chases a mysterious key that everyone wants, even though no one knows what it opens. With the clock running out, Cassie must rely on Nick, but can he be trusted? If she does find the key, where will it take her? What exactly is the fate that destiny has prepared for her?

Cassie must call out God for the epic battle that will determine the future of the universe. Nick informs her there is no assurance that good will win. Cassie must first figure out what is good...what is evil...and where, if anywhere, is God? Turning everything she ever thought on its head, Nick leads her to question even her own understanding of science. Once reality is pitted against desire, nothing in the world will ever be the same again.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Jun 16, 2018
• ISBN: 9781387887286

Book preview

Yesterday & Tomorrow

Yesterday and Tomorrow

Robin Buckallew

Saffron Books

2018

Also by this author:

The Diary of Mrs. Noah

The Transformation

Alpha & Omega: Book I of the Godmaker Trilogy

Everywhere & Nowhere: Book II of the Godmaker Trilogy

I Am: Book III of the Godmaker Trilogy

Blood Ready

The Ocean Wore Red

It Is What it Isn’t

Copyright © 2012 by Robin Buckallew

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review or scholarly journal.

First Printing: 2018

ISBN 978-1-387-88728-6

Saffron Books

Cover design by: Mat Jones

For Dr. John George, who helped me understand it was all right to have more questions than I had answers.

1

The dance was well underway, shadows dipping and twirling in the moonlight. I watched in silence, my words choked by an emotion I couldn’t identify. Was it fear? Awe? The shadows and the light intermingled, floating effortlessly around the ballroom floor as the music drifted across the night sky, the melody eerie and hauntingly beautiful. The shadows sang with the music, adding their wistful voices to a strange melody everyone but me seemed to know.

The mists floated around the dancers, wrapping the shadowy figures in a lacy cloud, creating an illusion not unlike a painting by Childe Hassam. I hummed along as they sang, content to watch the dance, caught up in the mood and the moon. The faces of the dancers drifted in and out of focus, gentle light bathing the room with a soft, white glow. The song continued, a melody of passion, of longing, of…something I couldn’t quite place. I watched, and wondered, how did I get here? It seemed so long ago…and yet, so recent. I drifted off, slipping backward, back from this realm of surreal shadows to a material world which was all too real. It started a few weeks ago, as I remember…yes, less than a month.

It was November. I was working late, as usual, trying to finish up a few last details before I went home for the night. Just past Halloween, as I remember. No, wait, it was later than that…it was December. Friday, December 13. I glanced at the calendar, and remembered with a laugh how my students joked about superstitions because school was over on Friday the 13th in 2013. I shivered. What, are you being silly? I chided myself. Letting a silly superstition like Friday the 13th rattle me was alien to my nature. In spite of myself, I couldn’t stop shivering. I realized it was cold, as cold as death. I scolded myself for acting superstitious and tried to finish my grading, but I continued to shiver.

I heard the wind whip through the hallway. My door blew open and I jumped. Papers flew around the room, drifting into a messy pile under the window. Silly Cassie, I scolded myself again. It’s just an open door. Someone didn’t pull it tight when they left and it was yanked open by the wind. I headed toward the empty hallway, my eyes struggling to adjust in the dim light.

The man leaning on the wall just outside my office was a stranger, but there was something familiar about him, a handsome man in a well cut suit. I ignored him and flew down the hallway to yank the big entry door shut, locking it so it couldn’t blow open again. Satisfied, I headed back to finish grading, but his voice stopped me.

Good evening, he purred, his voice a melodious bass with just a touch of an English accent. I hope I’m not late.

I glanced over my shoulder, determined not to stare. It was difficult because he was compelling. Something about him was hypnotizing. Maybe it was his dark hair with a touch of gray at the temple, or his deep dark eyes. I shook myself and tried not to notice he was one of the best looking men I’d ever met.

Late?

For my appointment. I hope I haven’t kept you waiting.

I stared openly now, searching my mind for any hint of recognition. I didn’t have any appointments in my date book for tonight, I was sure. No way would I ever make an appointment for the last night of school, with so much grading to finish.

I’m Nick, of course, he added, bowing with a courtesy which seemed out of place in a hallway accustomed to the oblivious rudeness of college students.

Nick? I repeated, feeling stupid. I don’t know any Nick. I don’t have any appointments for tonight.

He laughed, a charming sound which captivated me in spite of myself. He held out his hand and I took it automatically. It was warm and smooth, the hand of an aristocrat. He bowed again and kissed my hand before releasing it.

Nick O’Malley. You sent for me.

I strained to remember. Did I know a Nick O’Malley? I was sure I didn’t, but he did look familiar. Perhaps a former student?

I’m sorry, Mr. O’Malley, I started, but he put a hand to my lips. The warmth of his touch tingled and took away the chill which still lingered in the tiled hallway.

Of course you don’t remember. You forgot the appointment, you naughty girl.

I opened my mouth to protest, ready to challenge him for his blatantly sexist comment and the reference to me, a tenured professor of biology at a major university, as a girl. The twinkle in his eyes stopped the words on my lips, and he bowed again with a courtesy I had not encountered since my grandfather died many years before. My annoyance melted and I wished he did have an appointment with me, though it was obvious he’d mistaken me for someone else.

I’m sorry, Mr. O’Malley…

Nick.

Nick. I don’t have any appointments tonight. You must have mixed me up with someone else.

Is there anyone else here?

I shook my head. I almost expected to hear it rattle in the empty building. No.

Then who else could I possibly have an appointment with?

I realized the answer was obvious, he was simply in the wrong building, but I remained silent as though puzzling over the question, delaying his departure. It was silly, I told myself, but I wanted him to stick around a little longer. He interested me. He waited until I spoke.

You must be in the wrong building. Who is your appointment with? I’ll see if I can help you find her.

Oh, no, I’m not in the wrong building. There is no one else, Dr. Wilcox…Cassie. You are my appointment.

He knew my name. All my senses recoiled; my fight or flight reflex kicked in and I felt my entire body tense. I wished I hadn’t scoffed at all those self-defense courses the school insisted we sit through, and that I had followed their advice and armed myself with a big can of mace. He laughed softly, a sound so gentle I began to relax.

No, you don’t know me, but I know you. I’ve known you forever, Cassie.

You know me? How do you know me?

His eyes stopped twinkling and took on a distant look, a look which managed to capture both the past and the future at the same time. My head swam as I drowned in his deep, dark eyes.

I know you. You are destiny.

He moved closer. He stood mere inches from me, his face so close to mine I felt as if we were about to dive into a passionate kiss. I remained still, not moving away from him, my normal instincts dulled by his warmth. When I spoke, my voice was hardly above a whisper.

Destiny? I am destiny?

He took my hands and held them to his face. I felt faint traces of stubble on his smooth face rough against my hands. I moved closer until our shoulders touched. I moved as though in a dream, in a trance. Who is he, I wondered. Is he a hypnotist? How does he know my name?

Who are you?  My voice was a whisper, but it sounded like a shout in the empty hallway.

I am yesterday. I am tomorrow. I am Nick O’Malley, but you might know me better by the name I’m called by my detractors… Beelzebub.

The spell broke. I grabbed my hands away and turned toward my office, yanking myself back out of those deep, dark eyes. This was a joke, and I didn’t like being played for a fool.

Okay, Mr. O’Malley, if that’s your name. You’ve had your fun. Who put you up to this? Was it Steve?

I didn’t see him move but he was in front of me, blocking my way. Now I was scared. He was so fast I might not be able to get away from him, and there was a long stretch of hallway between me and the outside door.

Oh, Cassie, dearest Cassie, this is not a joke. We have an appointment for tonight, and I’m here for our meeting.

Sorry, Mr. O’Malley, but I don’t have any appointments for tonight…except an appointment with my cat, who is waiting for me to get home. So, if you’re quite finished, I’ll be on my way.

Ice dripped from my best stern teacher voice. I tried to distance myself from the waves of emotion washing over me, threatening to short circuit my survival instinct. My formality didn’t faze him. He stood with his back to the office door and grabbed my hands, cradling them in his larger ones. I shivered, not with cold this time, but from the sheer warmth of him.

Cassie, little Cassie, you don’t remember me.

I examined his face, a faint memory taunting me, but I couldn’t place him in time or space. Slowly, I shook my head.

Do I know you? You seem familiar…but I don’t know any O’Malleys.

Oh, well, I suppose it’ll come to you soon. Meanwhile, our appointment.

He opened the door to my office and with a bow and a sweep of his arm, he motioned me inside. I moved into the small room and sank down in my chair, hardly aware of my own motion. He settled into the easy chair more commonly occupied by a worried student. He leaned back comfortably, clearly more at ease in my office than I ever felt.

I made a big show of checking my appointment calendar, but I knew what I would find. Nothing. It was exactly as I expected. I was booked tonight for nothing more exciting than a quick bite of dinner with my cat, a warm bath, and a light novel before bed. Now, it seemed, I was going to be delayed.

You’ve come a long way, Destiny…may I call you Destiny?

I’d rather you didn’t. My name is Dr. Wilcox. I kept the ice in my voice with an effort.

So formal, oh, so formal. Well, I suppose until you get comfortable …you’re not comfortable, are you, Destiny?

I glared at him. Why do you call me that? My name is Cassandra…Cassandra Wilcox. My friends call me Cassie. Everyone else calls me Dr. Wilcox.

If it’s possible for someone to bow sitting down, my guest appeared to do just that. His manner seemed so old-fashioned, so courteous, it was easy to get sucked into his world. I needed to keep all my wits about me. I struggled to listen to his words, and not the melody of his voice, as he answered.

Of course, I’ll honor your wishes. You are Cassandra Wilcox…may I call you Cassie? I do so hope we’re going to be friends. Was that a hint of amusement in his voice? Was he mocking me?

I nodded my assent and he brightened, a smile darting across his face and disappearing, leaving behind a look that, while pleasant, could not be called a smile.

Cassie, it’s time.

Time for what? I tried to remain casual, but the suspense was killing me. I was eager to know who he was and what he wanted with me.

Time for destiny…time for you.

For me to do what?

I tried to make myself sound as distant, as disinterested as possible, but all my nerve ends tingled. Something was different tonight, something had entered my world that I never saw before.

Time to acknowledge your destiny, and step forward to meet it. Don’t be afraid, little Cassie. We’ll go forward together. I’ll be by your side the whole way. I’ve been waiting for so long.

His voice lost the soft purr and I sensed an edge of excitement, of eagerness. He sat forward in the chair, scanning my face, looking for something. I tried to keep my face as expressionless as possible. I hoped my calm hid the electricity that sparked between us, electricity which scared and excited me. I wanted to fire off a thousand questions, but I was afraid to show my interest for fear of losing control of the situation.

I turned away from him and arranged papers on my desk, sorting through them one at a time, carefully and deliberately, as though the future of the free world hung on my getting every test situated just right. He waited. Neither of us spoke for over a minute while I shuffled papers from one spot back to another. He broke the silence.

You don’t believe any of this is happening.

Of course I believe it’s happening. I’m right here, and I can see you sitting there with my own eyes.

You don’t believe it, nonetheless. You’re totally rational, willing to accept what you can see, but not willing to take on faith that I am who I say I am.

I’m a scientist, Mr. O’Malley. I don’t take anything on faith; I must have evidence. And, you’ll have to forgive me, I’m an atheist. I simply don’t believe in Satan.

He nodded. Of course. I expected that. I’m prepared to prove myself.

I’m waiting.

Nick smiled, a mysterious, exotic smile that melted most of my objections, but I held firm. He turned his back to me and when he turned back around, he was holding a bouquet of roses. He held them out to me and I took them.

Nice. But hardly a convincing demonstration of supernatural powers. After all, I’ve seen many magicians do just that trick. It’s not even original. You’ll have to do better than that.

He grinned, lighting up his dark eyes. He leaned forward and pulled a quarter out of my ear. He handed me the quarter with a dramatic flourish.

Cute. I could do that one when I was seven.

What would you like me to do? Oh, I know. Hand me your key.

I frowned. This was getting silly. Are you planning to bend my key? I’ve seen the Amazing Randi do that one, and he’s not got any supernatural powers. He’s just a magician.

Just a magician? My dear Destiny…oh, sorry, Cassie…a magician is the most important man in the world. Keeping the magic alive is a crucial job. Without magic, without mystery, all the shadows disappear.

Yes, well, that may be so, but it’s hardly proof of extraordinary claims. Come on, Mr. O’Malley, if you have something better, let’s see it. If not, I’ve got work to do.

I turned away, hoping to prevent myself from getting lost in his eyes again, lost in his voice. Clearly the man was a magician. How good a magician was uncertain, because so far he had done only parlor tricks, and I knew the secret. I went through a phase in elementary school where I was convinced I’d be the world’s greatest magician when I grew up. Like most kids, I grew out of it, but clearly Nick O’Malley hadn’t.

All right, I understand. You’re a skeptic, as you should be. I’ll have to think of something to convince you. Meanwhile, may I walk you home? It’s getting late. I’d hate to think of you on the streets alone.

The offer tempted me. This was the most interesting man I’d met in a long time and I’d like to know who he was, and how he knew me. In spite of my treacherous thoughts, my best instincts kicked in and I decided to do the sensible thing.

It’s kind of you to offer, but really, I’ll be perfectly safe. I walk home alone by myself all the time. I’m not a little girl, you know.

I spoke defensively, throwing in the last bit to let him know he stepped over the line of appropriate behavior in calling me little Cassie. He looked me straight in the eyes and spoke so quietly I was almost convinced he was communicating with me through some unknown psychic connection.

You don’t have to worry about me, Cassie. I would never hurt you. You’re my destiny. You will be the one who decides my fate. I’ll walk you home. I want to walk beside destiny. Everyone wants to walk beside destiny.

I’ve always had a weak spot for poetry, and particularly for poets. In spite of the fact it never brought me anything but trouble, I gave in and allowed him to walk me home. He held my coat for me, and as I turned out the light in my office, he grabbed my briefcase and insisted on carrying it for me. I gave it to him.

We walked in silence through the dark streets. On the other side of town, the big box stores and supermarkets would be lit up and ringing with the sound of holiday shoppers. My little corner of the world was pleasantly quiet, a place where I could find solace. My companion didn’t break the silence but he did reach out and take my hand as we walked.

I gasped. I started to struggle, aware I was no longer touching the ground. What had he done? Had he grabbed me, lifted me? My mind went into overdrive, sending danger signals surging through my system, trying to warn my heart and lungs that extra effort would soon be needed. I flailed, trying to get my feet back on the ground. My companion appeared not to notice, looking straight ahead and walking silently along. He appeared unaware of anything unusual, but he was walking two feet above the ground…and so was I. I was not being carried, I was simply walking in the air as though I had discovered how to defy the law of gravity.

Help!

My voice rang through the quiet street. A light flashed behind the curtains of a nearby house and faces peered out the window, searching for the source of the distress call. After a cursory glance in my direction, the faces disappeared, and the house went dark.

What’s happening? Why didn’t they come out to help?

Why should they?

I