Dirk McAwesome and the Giant Fire Breathing Space Ants

By Richard Junk

This tongue-in-cheek short story follows the exploits of Dirk McAwesome as opposes a formidable colony of giant fire breathing space ants. Close your eyes and think back to your days visiting the local hobby shop, being regaled with tales of how great some nerd's hero was, then open your eyes and read this story! This text is best when paired with a room temperature beverage, carbonated to the reader's taste.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Jan 2, 2013
• ISBN: 9781300533344

Book preview

Dirk McAwesome and the Giant Fire Breathing Space Ants

Dirk McAwesome and the Giant Fire Breathing Space Ants

By Richard Junk

ISBN: 978-1-300-53334-4

Copyright 2012 Richard Junk

All Rights Reserved

Part 1

Hello, Dirk McAwesome said to the buxom young blonde who stood in front of him. She was stationed behind the intergalactic travel desk, holding Dirk’s travel papers - but instead of checking him in for the intergalactic flight that would be leaving shortly, she was checking him out.

Hi, handsome, she responded with a wink. Where are you headed this fine space-day?

Dirk smiled and snapped his head, tossing his hair back elegantly away from his eyes. I... he started, pausing for dramatic effect, ...am headed to the planet of giant fire breathing space ants.

The space-travel-agent’s jaw dropped in surprise. You’re going where? she questioned, her voice barely a squeak. Why would anyone go to that terrible place? she inquired, placing one hand over her heart as she did so.

Because, Dirk said dramatically, Someone needs to fight back! Dirk slammed his fist on the space desk that hovered between them. Those ants are oppressing local farmers, who would like to live their lives in peace and simply raise enough crops to feed their families. Large families, because they take in so many small, hungry orphans. Dirk looked grim, as he thought about the poor hungry orphans.

The space-travel-agent now placed her hand on Dirk’s, tenderly. And I’m sure you’ll rescue them, Mr. McAwesome, she whispered, looking into his eyes.

Dirk pulled away. Wait... he questioned, inquisitively.

What’s wrong? the space-travel-agent asked.

I never told you who I was, Dirk said, drawing the syllables of each word out as he spoke them. How do you know who I am?

The space-travel-agent blushed and looked flustered. Well, it says right here on your papers! she exclaimed, holding up his travel papers.

But I’m travelling under an assumed name, he shot back, opening his trench coat