Courage In The Fire

By Mandi Hart

DO YOU WANT TO OVERCOME FEAR AND FIND YOUR LIFE AGAIN?

Strikingly personal, insightful, and powerful, Courage in the Fire is a book about how fear can hinder your life and how you can break its hold — it’s about hope.

Courage in the Fire will:
•Explore the difference between fear and danger.
•Uncover your fears.
•Expose the lies intent on holding you captive, isolated, or anxious.
•Offer helpful tools to walk into freedom.
•Equip you with rhythms to live a full life.

Mandi’s eye-opening journey into the valley of fear, her tenacity to conquer its hold and embrace the fullness of life will inspire you to do the same.

Courage is much more exhilarating than fear. When you overcome your fears, you can pursue meaningful relationships, explore the unknown, take the plunge into a new business venture, be healthier and live your best life yet.

If you want to join her in becoming a fear fighter, this is the book for you!

Mandi Hart is a public speaker and the author of Parenting with Courage. She co-hosts a weekly slot on the radio on fearless living. Among other qualifications, she holds a Christian Counselling certification from UNISA. Mandi has hosted workshops in Africa, Asia, Europe, and the Middle East. She lives in Stellenbosch, is married to Neil and a mom of two teens.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mandi Hart
• Release date: May 14, 2020
• ISBN: 9780463854778

Mandi Hart

Mandi Hart is a writer and public speaker on parenting and courageous living. She is the author of Parenting with Courage and The Parenting Journal. Mandi also co-hosts a weekly slot on the radio on how to live without fear. She also speaks regularly on parenting and hostings parenting workshops wherever she can.Among other qualifications, she holds a Christian Counselling certification from UNISA. She and her husband, Neil, have travelled cross-culturally coaching and mentoring leaders. She carries the nations in her heart with workshops hosted in Asia, Europe, the Middle East and Africa. The Hart family moved to Cape Town in 2013 from Port Elizabeth and now live in the heart of the wine lands of South Africa. Together with her husband, two teenagers and two Scottish Terries, they call Stellenbosch home.It was only a few years after an armed robbery that Mandi realised how fear holds many people captive. After dealing with fear, she wrote this intensely personal book, Courage in Fire. Mandi is passionate about seeing women live full, fearless lives and is here to encourage you to live just like that.

Book preview

Foreword

Fear is something every one of us struggles with, whether it is an underlying never-ending fear or a momentary fear prompted by some event, or perhaps it is a profound trauma in which the pain and deep anxiety has a total grip over your life. Mandi Hart has tackled anxiety head-on and dealt with this irrational emotion.

Whether or not you recognize that you are struggling with fear, or maybe you are chained by it, this book will help you to understand others who live with fear or help your face your own fears head-on. You will understand what fear is and the many masks it wears.

It is interesting that the first emotion expressed in the Bible is that of fear or being afraid. After Adam and Eve had sinned, they hid from God and when the Lord came to them in the Garden, the first words they said were I was afraid (Genesis 3:10). He answered, I heard you in the Garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.

Satan planted the first fear, and since then, we have become captives to it. He hinders us from doing so much just through the power of fear or what Scripture calls the spirit of fear. However, the good news is that you can be set free from fear. It generally is a process and not an instant moment. This book is Mandi’s story of how she gradually walked out of deep fear. Stepping out of fear is a process. Don’t think that because God has not given you instant deliverance that you are some write-off. Don’t stop going through the process – at times you may crawl out of fear, and at other times you may have a leap forward. The truth is that you really can be set free. This book is invaluable on that journey.

Learning to trust God is the antidote to fear. Fear and faith are opposites. Fear kills faith, but faith in the Lord, who is sovereign over all and everything that happens to us can kill fear.

Mandi’s Devotional is a wonderful tool to prayerfully work through which will help in the process of freedom and healing from this powerful emotion. Fear can be so destructive to the whole of our being, and to the relationships which we have.

Whether it is a secret fear or a fear of failure or fear which controls your life, or whether it is a fear that you are stuck or some obsessive thought, or whether it is a fear that completely paralyzes you, this book is for you. The fear may have been with you since your earliest memories, or a common fear may have rocketed as a result of trauma – there is hope for you, and this book will help you.

Mandi doesn’t write academically – as if she was separated from real enslaving fear. No, this book is born out of her moving out of fear and into freedom.

Reading this well-written book is as gripping in a sense as the worst of fear. Perhaps Mandi’s story and trauma happened so that you could be helped to walk out of being a slave of fear into freedom from fear.

May the Lord free you as read Courage in the Fire.

John V. Thomas

Executive Chairman,

Living Hope: Bringing hope, breaking despair (South Africa)

Introduction

The hardships we endure can shape our character into something far more beautiful and stronger than we could’ve imagined, if only we allow healing to take place.

For so long, fear held me captive. Repeatedly, I wrestled and struggled against its effects. But for years, fear lay hidden, subtly influencing my thoughts, words and actions. Only once I figured out what held me back in different areas of my life was I ready to stand up and fight for freedom.

It can feel as if you are in the fire with nowhere to turn – its flames licking at your heels and confusing you at every turn. I’ve been there. What if I told you that you could have courage in the fire too? Over 80% of people struggle with fear in differing degrees of intensity. (1) The way we respond to fear makes all the difference. I believe that if I could conquer fear, then you can too. And it is possible to live a far richer and more satisfying life than you could ever imagine. What you are reading is that hope written as my story in ink. More than that, these pages offer you an opportunity to face your fears, conquer them, and emerge on the other side, fearless and free.

How fear entered the world

The strategy to hinder God’s purposes for humanity began early in history. In Genesis Chapter 3, we read that the serpent was more crafty than any other creature that the Lord God had made. This creature, skilled in deception, was superbly talented at achieving his goals. The serpent was really the devil in disguise as he can appear in various forms. Through a skilfully constructed question, he appealed to Eve’s mind to bring doubt; then with desire, he lured her heart and finally disobedience with her will.It was a trap. The serpent asked her a question that caused her to doubt the validity of God’s instruction. When they listened to the snake, Adam and Eve exchanged the truth for a lie. The stakes were high, and they lost not only their intimacy with God but their freedom too.

Fear is rooted in deception

Deception is the root of all untruths. The first lie that Adam and Eve believed was that they could become like God, but without the responsibility. They wanted to know right from wrong, but Adam and Eve never wanted the consequences that came along with that ability. For every choice we make, and for every action, there is a consequence. The serpent deceived the first man and woman into believing that God had not told them the truth.

Every day, we face the temptation to believe Satan’s lies rather than God’s truth. Every single day, this temptation entices us to listen to the voice of fear speaking into our hearts and minds. We then follow Adam and Eve’s example of hiding our true selves. Fear paralyzes us. We begin to cover up and pretend that things are other than what they really are, and our capacity to embrace a full life dies. Unless we courageously confront our chains and fight for freedom, fear will defeat us.

Chapter 1 introduces my story of overcoming fear. I hope this will encourage you to share your story with others. I’ve put a particular chapter in for those who struggle with the effects of being afraid. Resilience is critical to succeeding in life. There’s a section on that too. At the end of the book, I will invite you to join me living a life without fear, a fearless movement if you will.

#courageinthefire

#fearfighter

When you read Courage in the Fire, you will uncover for yourself the unparalleled freeing and healing power of the resurrection life that Jesus bought for us on the cross. I hope that you will explore and discover a new outlook on life, free from fear in all its forms.

A head full of fear can’t dream.

A heart full of fear can’t love.

A body full of fear can’t function as it should.

Fear wants to control your life.

So, when fear knocks, does faith answer the door and find no one standing there?

Beautiful people don’t just happen

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, [known fear], known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross [my words added in brackets].

Fear doesn’t discriminate. Men, women, children, teenagers, every race and every colour will encounter this challenge at some stage. Beautiful people don’t just happen. They emerge out of the darkness and into the light by confronting their fears and their pain. It takes courage to face that which you fear.

If you’ve picked up this book because you are tired of a fear ruling or hindering your life, then you’re in the right place. May you walk out of the haunting shadows and into the joyous sunlight, free to live and free to dream! Let hope emerge.

Chapter 1

Deceived by Fear

Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears.

Rudyard Kipling

The thing about deception is that it is just a fraction of a degree off True North. To deceive someone is the act of making that person believe something that is not true. Fear is, therefore, deception in its most raw form.

Fear can grow slowly through a series of choices or situations or launch a sudden full-on assault through a traumatic event. We can pass it down through generations and let it deceive us with its spiritual onslaught.

Although fear is sneaky in its ways, the goal is always the same. Fear’s agenda is a single-minded focus on crippling the lives of men and women across the world.

However it may look, fear seeks to deceive you, conquer you and render you powerless. Discussing this aspect of fear with a lady recently, she blurted out, That describes me perfectly. I feel paralyzed by fear, and I keep on thinking, what if something bad will happen?

Fear is a terrible master. Once we open the door to its influence, it can grow and grow, tormenting us at every turn. There is a way out of the fire, chains and bottomless pit that fear holds us captive in. Throughout this book, you will uncover ways to heal from your pain, conquer your fears and receive the gifts of joy, healing, hope and freedom. The God of all mercy and comfort is here to show you how to conquer every single fear.

Seeds grow into something bigger

Since early childhood, I remember striving for love and acceptance. A tiny seed planted in my young heart was the lie that love and performance were directly proportional. I believed that if I performed well, my parents and others would love me more. I don’t know where it came from. My mom and dad loved me deeply, but I remember striving since I was a young child. It’s weird how you remember certain things. I just wanted to be the best at everything (which isn’t wrong if done with the right motive). But if I couldn’t be the best, then I would react poorly.

So, how did this driving fear manifest in my life? It emerged in the form of competitiveness and moodiness. I wanted to be in control.

That meant that when I didn’t do well at whatever I had set my heart on, I would feel less loved. I loved to win, because winning reinforced that lie that was growing in my young heart. My mother recalled that my first attempt at swimming in a school gala turned out to be a nightmare.

Everyone knew that I thrived on swimming and playing in the water. I learned to swim at age three and was comfortable in the water. Naturally, entering the 10m school gala for Grade-Ones was an easy decision. Just before the event, I asked my mom if I would win. When she said that she couldn’t guarantee it, I promptly put my foot down, stubbornly refusing to swim. Fear manifests itself in a variety of ways. This time, in the form of a childish tantrum. So, I never even started playing the game. I never swam in that gala. Fear inhibits you, and it stops you from trying. Crazy, right? But, then, fear never makes sense because it is irrational.

Fast forward a few years, our family had moved cities multiple times, and I was now in high school. I rebelled during my early teenage years. Looking back, fear of man, fear of failure, and believing lies that the enemy fired accurately into my mind all played a role. Fear was having a field day in my heart and soul. By accepting and entertaining these deceptive thoughts, I caused pain for both my family and myself. Those were difficult years for all of us.

One moment can change your life for eternity.

Then, my life changed forever. Around the age of 17, I became friends with a group of believers. They invited me to a mid-week gathering. At the Saved Surfers Club in Port Elizabeth, South Africa, I discovered a different way of doing life. We spent every spare moment on the beach or riding the waves. I was a teen with a heart yearning for connection, and I soon found what I was looking for. At a 24-hour Surfathon, I made a commitment to follow Jesus. Late on a summer night in November 1992, I was born again. The community I found myself in, coupled with love and discipleship from more mature believers, set my life on a different course.

Fire and devastation

Fast forward to married life: Moving our family of four to Cape Town in 2013 catalyzed fear’s advance into our lives. A relocation meant a change in schools, homes and everything familiar. My husband, Neil, and I were to lead a global mission and church planting spiritual family. We never realized that the war which the enemy was waging against us was about to increase to a horrifying level. Some of what we experienced was my car broken into three times in the space of two years, both of our dogs bitten by snakes (only one survived!), a stolen vehicle and many other hardships.

Cape Town has regular summer fires on the mountains surrounding our home. One such fire came during the late summer of 2015. Driven by gale-force winds and scorching heat, the mountain ranges around our home went up in flames for days on end. Hardly anything survived, and it even burned the ground black. I wondered if the land and vegetation would ever recover. But it did. It took a couple of years, but the proteas bloomed again, and the animals returned. Beauty came in place of ashes and devastation. Little did I know that a ‘fire’ in our family was about to bring a form of devastation that would take years to heal and that I would seek comfort in what had happened on the mountainside a few months previously. A beautiful life can emerge from ashes.

On the chilly night of June 6th, 2015, while Neil was leading a missions trip in Zimbabwe with some of our staff, fear jettisoned into our lives. My daughter, Emily (12), after a rough day competing in a squash tournament, slept in my bed that night. Cold and windy outside, we both needed the warmth of each other. Matt (14) slept in his room on the other side of the house while my mother, who had recently moved to Cape Town, lay resting in our guest room at the far wing of the house. All was quiet on that winter’s night with my children dozing peacefully, and the dogs snug in their kennels.

Startled awake by strange noises, I was on immediate alert with my heartbeat rising rapidly. I listened for the bark of our Boxer and Labrador, but nothing. It was silent, just the sound of the wind rattling the wind. Still, there were more sounds, unrecognizable. I thought perhaps Matt was noisily moving around but was nervous about getting out of bed on that chilly night. We’d all been asleep for a while, and besides that I was cosy in my bed.

I rolled over to look at the time on my cellphone. I somehow couldn’t shake the feeling that what I had heard wasn’t merely the wind. It was 3am and feeling unsettled, I listened more closely. Still, no dogs barking. Emily was in a deep slumber, breathing heavily.

Suddenly a sharp light pierced my sleepy eyes, leaving me blinded for a few seconds. I could feel my heart rate spike instantly and felt as though it would jump right out of my chest. What is going on? I thought. Without warning, they switched the bedroom lights on, and I realized there were four men in the room with us. The robbers arrived on the scene armed with sharp butcher knives and long screwdrivers. The men, disguised in dark clothes, balaclavas and gloves, focused their attention on Emily and me. I noticed one of them do a double-take. It seemed he expected there would be a man in the room. Instead, they found two scared females.

Where’s da money? one of them menacingly whispered. Be quiet! Where’s da money? he repeated in a hushed order. The other man opened our exterior bedroom doors, which led to the swimming pool and stood guard. The third man began scratching around