Nice Birthday Party, Governor

By David J. Wighton

This book continues the Wilizy's efforts to bring justice to the Denver Cattleman's Association, the DCA. Cowboy and his disguises were instrumental in discovering the truth about them. Winnie in her almost a costume was key to catching individual DCA members in the act. What act that was is too spicy to be shared now.

With the DCA members out of the picture, the Wilizy simply had to turn the population against the governor of Colorado and reveal him for what he and the DCA have done. Easy, peasy. In a Winnie-directed dramatic production, Lohla and Lylah pretended to be basketball groupies entranced by a descendant of a basketball icon. Marie pretended to be a gun-toting sharpshooter while Doc got to limp and lisp at the same time. If anybody were hungry, Bob, the visible dragon, was heating up a tasty lunch.

In a second story line, Eleanor, the banker lady from Book #13, was delegated by the Swiss prime minister to defend the country from terrorists seeking Switzerland's gold and jewels. Her forces consisted of twelve tourist paddle boats on land-locked Lac Leman. Not to worry. Led by Jock, Hank, and Mac, the whole Wilizy family was ready to take on NORAD's entire fleet of armed copters and its silos of nuclear missiles.

• Language: English
• Publisher: David J. Wighton
• Release date: Jul 12, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463697610

David J. Wighton

David Wighton is a retired educator who enjoys writing youth novels when he's not on a basketball court coaching middle-school girls. The books in his Wilizy series peek at how people lived after the word's governments collapsed in the chaos that followed the catastrophic rise in ocean levels and the disappearance of the world's last deposits of oil. Luckily today, in the 2080s, the citizens of Alberta are safe because their It's Only Fair society uses brain-bands to zap people whenever they break a rule. That way, all children grow up knowing the difference between right and wrong. Unfortunately, they're also taught that women's ankles need to be covered so that men can't see them and turn into perverts. Plus, no-one in Alberta can have babies any more because the government manufactures them in a way that ensures that no child has an unfair advantage over any other child. All of this makes sense to Alberta's dictator, but not to Will and Izzy – two teenagers who are decidedly different from everyone else.Wighton's novels have strong teenage characters driving the plot and facing challenges that, in many respects, are no different from what teenagers face today. His novels are intended to entertain and readers will find adventure, romance, suspense, humour, a strong focus on family, plus a touch of whimsy. Wighton also writes to provoke a little thought about life in today's societies and what the future might bring. Teachers may find the series useful in the classroom and the novels are priced with that intent in mind.

Book preview

Chapter 1

My readers may recall that in the previous book, Lillian had not been impressed with Paula's decision to apply frontier justice to the two men who had murdered her. Just to remind you, let's go back to the ending of Coffee Can Kill Ya!

# # # # # # # #

They died, just like I died. They deserved to die for killing me. I made their deaths as close to mine as possible. They received justice.

Very well. Are you ready to go?

It was frontier justice. I was protecting my daughters. They're safe now.

And when Hell claims that you murdered those two men, what will you say?

Coffee can kill ya!

Well, if that's the way you want to end your time here on Earth, that's your choice. You've already had a long wait in the Afterlife Sorting Station's queues. I'll pop you up to the front of queue this time.

Wait...

********************

I'm waiting, Lillian said. What am I waiting for?

That HEE that you mentioned.

The Heavenly Entrance Exam. What about it?

Do ghosts have to pass the HEE?

Only if you want to go to Heaven. As a mortal, you would have passed. But those two premeditated murders from your afterlife put your HEE squarely in the Go to Hell camp.

It was justice. They killed me, so I killed them. Self defense.

An interesting argument. It might work if you had killed them as they were killing you. But your two murders were well after the fact. They were premeditated.

I'm a ghost. Where in the ghost body manual does it say that ghosts aren't allowed to murder their murderers?

There is no manual.

My point exactly. If there are no laws about ghosts murdering their murderers, how can I be found guilty of that?

Another interesting argument. But, your HEE score is still going to fail you.

That doesn't seem right if Heaven has no rules against it. Has anything like this happened before?

We had a ghost who haunted some people who had killed a lot of young women and their babies. Those people ended up choking to death. But she's making herself more skilled now so that she can do a lot of good for people. We're keeping an eye on her.

I could do good for people.

Another interesting idea. A ghost helping people instead of haunting them. It might work. Hell doesn't know about you yet, so they can't complain if you stayed on Earth for a while. It could be dangerous though.

I'm already dead.

I have been looking for somebody who could conduct some science-based research for us. How's your chemistry knowledge?

Solid.

"Tell you what I'll do. I'll give you a temporary extension of your time here on Earth while you investigate the vice presidents of a chemical company called the Loveland Chemical Research Institute. When you're not doing that, soak up lots of sun in your garden.

# # # # # # # #

Meanwhile, over in Switzerland, a cabinet meeting was in progress.

I say we should just ignore it. This is some hoodlum trying to extort money from us. He doesn't even describe what he's going to do if we don't pay.

Whoever he is, he's ambitious. I'll give him that.

Trying to extort money from an entire country? Who does he think he is?

He's a crazy man, that's who he is. We have better things to do in this meeting than react to some lunatic.

I agree. We should move on to the next item on the agenda. Geneva is asking for an increased police presence for their Oktoberfest celebration. This comment from the Swiss prime minister effectively put an end to any further discussions about hoodlums and extortion attempts.

My forces are already stretched as far as I can stretch them, the Minister of Justice and Police warned.

What about bringing up the reserves? Oktoberfest celebrations can get rowdy.

Close the bars early?

...

The rest of the cabinet meeting focused on Oktoberfest and ended thirty minutes later. Now that all the men had had a chance to talk, theoretically, the sole female in the cabinet meeting would be able to put a voice to her thoughts about what had been discussed so far in the meeting. But as usual, the men were standing up, collecting their papers, and streaming out of the meeting room. Who would listen to her? The walls? It was like she was invisible.

# # # # # # # #

In Montana, the Wilizy were having a meeting about recent events in Denver. Operation Wasp Nest had gone well but the subsequent deaths of the body snatchers had been alarming. It was Thursday evening, October 21 2089 and nobody in the meeting was thinking about having a celebration like Oktoberfest. The mood was decidedly unfestive.

We're completely dead in the water now, Stu summarized. We have no leads that we can follow.

The actual operation was a success, Melissa reminded them. We know who the two murderers were and that they were part of the military presence in Colorado Springs. They also had apartments in Denver.

We don't have verifiable proof that they were associated with the Denver Cattlemen's Association that controls the state government, but that link is likely, Mac added.

We were going to track those men back to their boss, but they died suddenly, Stu added. Their deaths killed anything we might do to get Lohla and Lylah their share of their uncle's estate. That's impossible now.

Can we at least pursue the links between the DCA and the NORAD facility? Hank asked.

No, Stu killed the optimism. We had three links - Swensen and the two murderers. All three are dead.

Only the DCA would benefit from those three men dying. But, from all appearances, the two snipers died from natural causes. The Denver sheriff didn't even put up crime scene tape.

Those two deaths were very lucky for the DCA. I've never believed in lucky coincidences that involve dead bodies.

What are you saying, Hank? Yolanda asked.

Those deaths were murders is what I'm saying. The DCA or the military has another assassin working for them. If we find him, we'll find the link we need.

Lylah and Lohla have expressed an interest in getting involved, Lucas interjected.

We should take them up on their offer, Stu said. We need more white skin if we want to operate visibly in Denver or in Colorado Springs.

The meeting broke up shortly afterwards. The new mission? Find the assassin who had killed the two men in their apartments no matter where he was. Nobody in the group even imagined that the assassin could be a woman or that she could have been a woman in another life.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 2

The following day, Stu was approaching the counter of the Denver Sheriff's office reception area when Stook came out of his office. I'll take this, Sheila, he interrupted Stu as he was about to speak. Sir, as I told you last week, we do not conduct searches for missing pets. You really should be talking to the people at the S.P.C.A. I'll give you directions.

Stook bustled Stu outside. The S.P.C.A. is two blocks south and one block east. His hands mimed the directions.

Why do I want to go there? Stu murmured.

There's a coffee house across the street. Have a bite to eat. Their roast beef sandwiches are good. I'll be there in half an hour.

Stook shook the stranger's hand and then returned inside. Some people, he shook his head at Sheila on the way back into his office.

# # # # # # # #

I have been the recipient of a wonderful gift, Stook exclaimed to Stu as he put his sandwich and coffee cup on the table. He lifted the top of his roast beef sandwich and took a smell. The reason this place is safe to meet is because of its proximity to the animal shelter across the street. This meat doesn't smell like cat. The sandwich should be safe to eat.

Stu looked around and noticed that nobody else was in the coffee house. He then stared with some alarm at the crumbs of his own roast beef sandwich.

Kidding. Stook took a big bite and began chewing. This place will be full at noon. That gives us twenty minutes and you need to be gone by then. I have to get back quickly too. Stook took another bite.

The gift?

After years of asking for more personnel in the sheriff's office and being ignored, I received three new hires this morning - an office manager and two deputies. I didn't get a chance to even interview them, or a choice whether to keep them or not. I've since been able to determine that none of them has had any law enforcement training or experience.

Somebody is watching you now.

Ayup.

Because of the two recent murders?

More likely because of my interest in watching the government extend the time limit before being able to declare murdered bagmen dead. I sensed that I was being watched after that. Stook drained his coffee cup before continuing. Did you guys have anything to do with the two dead men in the apartment building? We're off the record here.

"We were interested in those two men but we didn't kill them. We watched them dig up Paula Richardson's coffin a few days before their deaths. How'd those guys die?"

Too soon after they dug up that coffin for my taste. Was somebody watching you as you watched them?

No. We did notice that you didn't declare the building a crime scene. We were watching you at that point. Perhaps you sensed that?

Perhaps. Did you have a rifle pointing at me?

Course not.

I've been in this business a long time. Experienced lawmen develop certain intuitions when they're in danger. I never ignore them. That's one of the reasons why I'm alive.

Is that why you didn't open up a crime scene?

No. There was no reason to declare it a crime. There were no signs of violence. No signs of forced entry either. I'm trying to do background searches on the two men but I'm hitting a dead wall.

We know that they had links to NORAD. They flew a military copter that came out of that mountain and tried to murder Paula's daughters. We don't know if they had links to the CBA.

Feels to me like those two deaths would solve a lot of problems for somebody.

And now you have new staff to keep an eye on you.

Yup. In case I don't get to see you again...

Are you serious?

Yes, I'm serious. I've sent the two bodies to the mortuary and have requested post mortems. They were too young to die in their sleep. Some people may not appreciate my efforts to seek the truth.

When do you expect the results?

The results should be ready early next week.

Can you sense the difference between friendly watching and malevolent watching?

Yuh. I get an itchy feeling in the part of my body that the rifle is aiming at.

One of us will be near you from now on. Don't worry if you don't see us. We're good at hiding.

# # # # # # # #

Paula was in Loveland, Colorado, a small city that was about fifty miles north of Denver. She was wandering around the Loveland Chemical Research Institute. Her path to her redemption in Lillian's eyes obviously started inside this building. So, she was wandering around mapping out the building's offices and labs. Instantaneous travel inside the building worked. From now on, she could go wherever she wanted to in this building. Why Lillian would want her to do that remained a mystery.

Back to the Table of Contents

Chapter 3

It was 6:30 one night later. Stook was standing outside the sheriff's office, locking up for the night. If you're wondering how a big city's sheriff's office can lock up for the night at 6:30 p.m., it's because Denver was a very safe city. When he had first arrived, Stook implemented daytime and nighttime shifts but the nighttime shift was never needed. The office was busy in the day, but never in the evening. It was like burglars and other miscreants only worked 9 to 5. Now, unless he had a case to work on, Stook closed shop at 6:30 every night including weekends. This was a Saturday night.

Hey, Sheriff, a young girl's voice intruded into the puzzle Stook was trying to solve in his mind. As in, the puzzle about where a Wilizy person could be hiding and watching him. Stook had already checked the tops of the buildings on the other side of the street.

Hey, Sheriff, the young girl repeated.

A-huh? Nobody is loitering on the sidewalks.

Hey, Sheriff. I need directions to the S.P.C.A. My cat has gone missing.

Stook looked down. The little blonde girl looked vaguely familiar. She was wearing the uniform of the very exclusive Denver Academy. Only the ultra rich need apply. He stared for a bit and then the memory clicked.

I saw you at the cadet camp. It was your first real day as a cadet. Your name is...

Maddy. Uncle Stu wants you to give me the key to the front door and you're supposed to tell me the passcode on your alarm system.

Stook did what she requested. When do I get the key back?

We'll need half an hour.

I'll grab a bite.

Where?

Elite Diner, two blocks to your left.

"When you come out of the diner, another girl in the Denver Academy uniform will meet you. Her name is Liset. She'll say SPCA and give you back the key."

In fact, Liset would be wearing the same uniform that Maddy had on right then. Denver Academy uniforms had been hard to find in the youth sizes on short notice.

# # # # # # # #

To my readers wondering if the Wilizy were able to get a security blanket for Stook in place quickly, the answer is Yes. Stu made it a priority and Melissa and Mac developed the plans. One of William, Wolf, or TG would be invisibly within lasering distance of Stook when he was in public. In addition, TG created an extensive drone network around the perimeter of the sheriff's home and above the workstations of his three new employees. In both cases, a Wilizy Warrior would be watching the live feeds and would be ready to supply protection.

In addition to Stook's guard detail, Winnie, Mac and Melissa had trailed the three new employees home. While Maddy was talking with Stook, the Transcendental Trio was travelling back three months in time to break into three apartments and plant drones. They also were able to determine where the three of them had worked in the same time travel journey. Tomorrow they'd review the data from the homes. If nothing incriminating surfaced about their home life, they'd plant drones in their former work places.

Meanwhile, Stu was pursuing a longer-term plan to keep Stook alive.

Narrator interlude: The only hitch that slowed the planning came from yours truly, sad to say. Remember that I was nine-years old at the time. When I heard that Maddy was going to be given a job in an operation and I wasn't, I acted my age. Our moms tried to say it was because Maddy had received infiltration training. I argued that I could infiltrate as well as she could. Then I pushed the favoritism argument. I added some pouting and temper tantrums and got my way. This was not my finest moment. Maddy was upset because I was going to cut her part in the operation in half. As you'll appreciate, Maddy never was too inclined to share the exciting parts of her life. She wanted to take charge of those. We weren't friends for a while after my tantrums. Later, when I saw what things Maddy could do that would freeze me in fear, we became friends again.

# # # # # # # #

It was Sunday. Stook had left his copter in the usual parking lot by his apartment and was walking to the office for his afternoon shift. Now that he had two deputies, he was able to set up half shifts for everybody on the weekend. He was walking by a school playground, not thinking, mind in neutral, when...

Hey, Mister.

Stook looked up and saw a young girl in the playground by the swings. She was bundled up against the cold so he couldn't see her hair or anything else about her actually. Stook was an experienced detective. It was Maddy.

Yeah?

My swing won't work. Could you fix it for me?

Sure.

Stook ambled through the gate and into the playground. It would be an easy fix. Somebody had thrown the swing over the top bar so that it dangled only half way to the ground.

It's too high for me, Maddy said.

I can see that. Step out of the way and I'll throw the swing over the bar the other way.

...

Thanks, Mister.

More quietly now.

You have a deputy with black hair and long sideburns.

That's Sully.

Have him clean all the guns in your armory this afternoon.

Why?

He's not your friend. Get rid of him tomorrow. You'll know how.

# # # # # # # #

Later Sunday afternoon, Stook heard some explosive sneezing coming from the back room where the guns were stored. Curious, he ambled to the back. Sully was standing up behind the table holding the guns and a can of gun oil, sneezing. Each sneeze was getting stronger and stronger. Sully was holding his ribs by the time that Stook reached him and walked him outside. The room reeked of the smell of gun oil.

What happened? Stook asked.

I was pouring a bit of oil onto my rag and the can slipped and the oil spilt onto the table. I started sneezing and couldn't stop.

Are you OK now?

Yeah.

You might have inhaled some of the smell. When you're ready, go on back in.

...

Later, Stook heard explosive sneezing again. He stepped out of his office. Sully was standing outside the gunroom, holding his ribs. Again, they went outside to get fresh air.

I didn't even make it into the room, Sully exclaimed.

I'll wipe the table off for you. That's a lot of gun oil on the table. How come you spilt so much?

I don't know. It was like my hand had a mind of its own.

Come back in when you're ready.

...

More sneezing.

Why don't you take the rest of the shift off? That'll give your lungs a chance to clear.

# # # # # # # #

Monday morning. Sully arrived on time and looked refreshed.

Are you OK, Stook asked.

Yes. Some sort of sneezing fit, I guess. Thanks for giving me time off.

Sure. Where's your side arm?

Desk drawer.

Change the ammunition in it, will you?

Why?

Just do it.

Six rounds in, six rounds out.

Smell your hands.

Sully started sneezing and couldn't stop. Stook had to hold him by the elbow to steer him outside.

Later, when the sneezing had stopped.

Son, I have some bad news for you.

Apparently, lawmen who become suddenly and inexplicably allergic to the smell of gun oil don't hold their deputy jobs for very long.

# # # # # # # #

Tuesday morning. Stook was in the gunroom, washing the table down with bleach.

Sheila called down to him from the front desk. Sheriff, there's a man here to see you. He says you know him.

Send him down.

...

Cowboy! What are you doing here?

I heard you lost a deputy.

# # # # # # # #

Later that morning, Cowboy told Stook what the Wilizy had discovered about the new staff he was given.

Sheila Enderby, 25, had been a new hire in the Public Affairs Bureau of the government. This office is charged with giving the public news on government initiatives. In Colorado, that meant spinning stories to make the governor look good. Before that, she had been a flunky in the governor's office. She was young and good looking. It was entirely possible that she would be reporting what Stook was doing directly to the governor.

Hoss Cranston had arrived in Denver only two days ago. The Wilizy were able to track him back to Colorado Springs and to some military position inside the NORAD base. They couldn't track him any further. With his military training, he would fit in quite easily as a soon to be sheriff of Denver. They had no proof of that future scenario. But, installing a new sheriff seemed like the best way for the government to solve any problems that might exist in the Denver Sheriff's department going forward. The Wilizy would have preferred to send