Finding a Way Out: Kevin Was a Teenager, Carefree and Invincible…Until Diagnosed with Cancer. His Mom Shares Her Perspective from the Journey to Help Others Facing a Similar Challenge.

By Susan Long Dineen

Ten weeks after going through thirty-six rounds of radiation and four rounds of intensive, chemotherapy treatments, our author Susan Long Dineens eighteen-year-old son left for college. Having been with him during ninety-six doctors appointments and brief hospitalization stays, she questioned whether his immune system could withstand the rigors of college life.

Kevin headed for an environment with carefree college students who were in much different places. Susan was not the least bit prepared for what unfolded after he departed for college. The story documents her personal journey and seeks to encourage others who may face a similar challenge as a parent of a teenager living through a traumatic experience like cancer. In addition to Susans story, Kevin shares his thoughts that provide insights from the mind of a teenager facing his greatest life challenge.

Cancer never affects just the individual with the diagnosis. It also involves family and friends. This true life story of a young mans struggle to survive is told from his Moms perspective. Susan draws us in to share the anguish of patient and family, as well as healing on many levels.

Dr. Louis Schroder, MD; Kevins oncologist

Parents of adolescent, teenage, and young-adult children, dealing with cancer issues, will have more perspective after reading Finding a Way Out. Susans experiences with her son helped us with our sons own cancer journey.

Bill and Gindy Schneller

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Dec 6, 2011
• ISBN: 9781449732158

Susan Long Dineen

Susan Long Dineen’s love for children led her to pursue a degree in primary education. She taught school, was a stay at home mom for her three children, and has launched two businesses: Child Care Professionals, Inc. and Productive Parenting, LLC; She and her husband, Rich, live in Cincinnati, Ohio.  

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Copyright © 2011 Susan Long Dineen

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Scripture taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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ISBN: 978-1-4497-3216-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4497-3215-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011961360

Printed in the United States of America

WestBow Press rev. date: 12/02/2011

Contents

Foreword

Epilogue

Resources:

Foreword

Once in a therapy career if you are fortunate, you meet a client who changes you. Of course, the opposite is what we expect – that the client will be changed by the therapist, but if you are open, you will be deeply touched and so a mutual process will be created. I had such an experience and I will never be the same. This is Kevin’s story.

Kevin Dineen walked into my professional life and began therapy. Prior to his first appointment, his mother, Susan, had called in her search for the appropriate, the best suited, the right therapist for her son whom she had watched suffer for several prior years due to a rare cancer diagnosis. She knew that Kevin was struggling with anger, depression, grief, pain and isolation and she simply wanted him to feel better. What mother wouldn’t have those hopes for her child?

Initially, Kevin was cautious, careful and exact in describing the cancer treatments and surgery that he had endured and he was thorough in his reporting. Very quickly though, he began to open more emotional pain which was severe and traumatic. I gently tapped into it through the relationship of trust that we formed and Kevin opened the doors which were formerly sealed. It was the emphasis on the connection between us that made all the difference which solidified for me the importance of the therapeutic relationship. As we began therapy, the depth of Kevin’s anger and rage were revealed, and I attempted to provide a safe environment for it to unfold. Of course, he additionally had anxiety about the return of the cancer with each check up and scan which fueled his emotions as well. This journey wasn’t easy or simple, but rather complex, exhausting and intensive.

Kevin had extraordinary support from his family and friends who encouraged him in each step. You will read about that support in Susan’s story and how the entire family was affected due to their closeness. The therapy was focused initially on Kevin’s emotions about being victimized by cancer. The depth of those feelings felt inexhaustible at the time.

These comments would be incomplete without a mention of the spiritual component of Kevin’s healing and the depth of his faith. He transformed himself from a man who was furious with God for allowing this to happen, to a man who felt enveloped by God’s arms.

This is a story of courage, of hope, of commitment and mostly of love. Read this with the compassionate eyes of a mother who never gave up, of a Dad who brought strength and support to a son whom he watched in pain, of a sister and brother who listened for countless hours with the knowledge and understanding that just being heard was a crucial gift that they could give their brother, of friends who were present as well, planted firmly in Kevin’s life, faith filled and solid.

Healing requires a network. Kevin is central to the story and if you have been diagnosed with cancer, or you are a family member or friend of someone living with cancer, this story is for you.

Because of Kevin and his unforgettable journey, I’ve grown stronger and more faith filled and I’ve gone on to provide consultation to the staff at Cancer Family Care in Cincinnati, Ohio. Thanks, Kevin, for the gift you have given me and thanks, Susan, for telling his story.

Michael L. Tebbe, MSW, LISW

Faculty, School of Social Work

University of Cincinnati

Life for me had been relatively carefree until Kevin’s diagnosis. After hearing the diagnosis, I was determined to help him. Kevin was focused on getting through the treatments, but he wanted nothing to do with any changes in his life. The story chronicles the events that move from cancer treatment to its aftermath. Kevin shares his thoughts along the way that provide insights from the mind of a teenager. I describe the journey and reflect on my life-changing experience in hopes of helping others.

• February 4, 2011

As I reached for the ringing phone, I glanced at the one-year photograph of our youngest son’s daughter, McKenzie. I was happy about the way it looked in the new acrylic frame.

When I picked up the phone, I was unaware that the conversation to follow would flood my mind with memories of a struggle endured seventeen years ago. Your next-door neighbor Suzanne suggested we give you a call, said the voice on the line. She said your teenage son had cancer a while ago. Our son was diagnosed with cancer and recently completed his treatments but is experiencing some challenges now that he is back in college …

A few days later, I spent nearly four hours sharing with this couple about my experiences dealing with our teenage son’s cancer journey. On the way home that day, I decided it was time to share my thoughts and words on paper—both to document my personal journey and to encourage others who may face a similar challenge as parents. I do not claim to be an expert on how this twisting road should be navigated. I share simply as a mom who continues to love her son and was determined to help him through a significant challenge in his life and mine. My path was not a straight one, but through God’s provision, it led to a place of healing for both me and my son that was beyond my imagination.

At the time, our family of five enjoyed healthy and busy lifestyles. My husband, Rich, was actively involved in a banking career that added social and professional events to our already busy lifestyle with