A Dream Away from Disarray

By Melissa Vinneau

After years of enduring physical and emotional abuse, and watching the sociopathic and psychopathic products of the treatment govern the rundown town, Ixion is determined to leave and find a better place for himself and his sister. Despite the ideology of the patriarchal and manipulative town members that there are no other places in the world, and no people left, he is willing to take the chance nonetheless. Although what he finds is more than he could have imagined, he is still haunted with the reality that he left his brother and mother behind. He fears it is too late for them, and struggles with uncertainty and guilt.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Nov 23, 2010
• ISBN: 9781452077277

Melissa Vinneau

Melissa Vinneau studied Psychology at the University of Massachusetts in Boston.

Book preview

Contents

Prologue

A Deplorable Perspective

Silenced Effectively

The Vulnerable Target

An Unwinding Journey

Home and Hope

The Guilty Revelation

Epilogue

Prologue

I WISH I KNEW THE world the way it used to be. Ixion says aloud to himself as he reminisces about the past. He sits in his favorite chair on the porch looking out into the water. He still has the broken toy soldier in his pants pocket. Although a young man now, that silly toy means so much to him. He wonders what his mother’s life was like when she was his age. She was young once also. Of course she forgot all events from her childhood, just like everyone else stuck in that place did, but he hopes with all his heart she was able to gain new positive memories, after the disasters. At this point in his life he accepts that she probably was not able to. By the time she began to change, it was too late for her. John effectively silenced her for so long. Just as she begins to emerge from the bounds society placed on her, she is once again trapped by the man she once put all her strength and hopes into.

Ixion scratches his head. He wonders how people can become such vile monsters. He should not have been born in this time. He wishes he can escape for good, but the past will always haunt him. Even if he is not physically there, the memories will always be present. Even if he took all the good people, and all his loved ones away from that place, more stains of grief and sadness would simply follow. He wants to be chivalrous, but the reality is he cannot eradicate the problem. He cannot erase the past. He cannot erase his past, or hers. She became the way she was for a reason. He can only help those who really want help.

A Deplorable Perspective

SHE WAITS UNTIL NIGHTFALL TO explore her curiosity. If someone stronger sees her, especially a man, she knows she could be killed. She ties her thick red hair back, tightly into a bun. She wears her darkest clothes, and pulls a large black hat over her hair like the rest of the ferrets do before they strike. The size of the hat is important for the ferrets. It deters others from approaching them as they scurry through town under the moonlight. Ferrets mostly consist of women, children, and elderly people who were too weak to claim a small business when they took over the town. However, they survive by breaking into houses and shops to get what they need. Although this goes on almost every night, most of the others do not seem to mind. It is a way of life. If they are motivated enough, they can go out hunting. They can try catching a ferret.

As the woman with red hair sneaks around the corners late at night, no one seems to notice. Her silhouette slides across the old brick and clay walls. From a distance she is just a shadow in the night. Although it is rare for ferrets to attack one another, it occurs on occasion if desired resources are at stake. One can never be too cautious though. At times, ferrets, like all other strong beings might attack simply to make a statement that they are dominant.

She becomes more vigilant as she nears the bookstore. The bookstore, like so many other shops had been barred up with two-by-fours and metal poles. Every effort was made to ensure no one could get inside. It was taboo. It was considered a place of the past that should not be explored. Individuals who found books inside homes were required to burn them immediately. The judge decided a long time ago that perhaps one day these places of the past should simply be set on fire, or destroyed somehow. However, he never followed through with this desire. Time passed, and no one really questioned why certain places were not granted access.

The woman ducks behind a pair of old mailboxes when she hears shouts coming from the firearm and ammunition store across the street and about a block away. Unlike the bookstore, this store is often heavily protected and guarded. Although the mailboxes are bent and twisted from the aftermath of the quake years earlier, tonight they serve as her hiding place. Although no one here has a use for mailboxes, they still stand in the broken streets nonetheless. It represents just another rundown part of the old town that no one cares enough about to repair.

The woman feels a rush of excitement run through her body as she crouches down listening to the shouting match. Although only a block away, she isn’t concerned that anyone will find her. Someone else clearly drew all the attention first. As she peeks through the space between the two mailboxes, she can see a shadow of a person try to run away with a rifle in hand. Surely it is another ferret out tonight. However, a larger individual, the woman presumes it to be a guard, follows directly behind. Although she loses sight as the individuals run around a dark corner, the shrieks of pain are evident enough that the guard caught the ferret.

After the show is over, and she deems it safe to continue, the woman with the red hair searches the perimeter of the building for a weak spot. Perhaps there is a place where the wooden planks are so swollen with water and mold that she can simply break them without making much of a sound. After careful inspection, she finds an area where only wood blocks an entrance. It will be much easier to pry through wood than metal. Finally, she is able to create a hole barely big enough to squeeze in. No man could fit in. She is surprised to find the door unlocked. After the judge put so much effort into keeping people out, she finds it strange that the door is left unlocked. However, the thick spider web that stretches and breaks as she opens the door proves no one has been inside in a long time. Except for a couple of mice scurrying across the floor, the place is silent.

The woman takes out her flashlight. She is excited, and thrilled by the risk she is taking. Scanning the light back and forth, she sees rows of shelves stacked with box like objects. Eager to explore, she walks to a random section of shelves and box like objects. On her way to see what is so taboo about the boxes, she knocks over a stack of thin papery square shaped objects. She picks one up to find pictures of people she has never seen before. As she turns the pages, there are more people. There are people smiling, swimming, hiking, and groups of people riding bikes. Perhaps these people are enjoying a funeral she thinks to herself as she scans a picture of a happy family walking on a beach. However, she slumps to the floor when she turns the page to find a woman holding a young child high up into the air. They are both smiling. They appear happy in their unconventional interaction.

As quick as a bullet train traveling from point A to point B, images of people shoot through her mind. They come and go so quickly she cannot explain them. However, they seem so real, as if she once knew who they were. In the vision, she was there too, lying on a slab of concrete that had jagged edges. Dust clouds filled the air, but she could still see the older woman and small child at her side and telling her to get up. Their arms were extended, and she was trying to reach. We need to take you there. Come with us. You need to go to the facility. You need the treatment, said the young boy’s voice. Although there was a lot of noise, cries, and screams of pain, the woman simply looked up at the faces and felt at ease. She was delirious, and pain shot through her back. However, the faces above her brought her comfort. As they lifted her body, all she could feel was the warm pressure of their arms holding her limp body. She cringed with pain, but her head felt numb. She kept coming in and out of a state of consciousness as she fumbled through the chaotic streets.

As soon as the woman regains her present train of thought, she throws down the magazine forcefully. She runs out of the bookstore without further exploring her curiosity to look at books. She is overcome by a hint of sadness, a feeling she has never experienced. However, she is determined to cover up her small hole near the entrance, and continue her normal way of life.

• • •

Mrs. Savitri stands in front of her students in the small schoolhouse that she helped build when they all first arrived. She is an older lady, but her facial expressions remain fluid and young looking despite the lines around her mouth and eyes. Her hands are always dry, wrinkled, and rough. They depict the real story of her hard work. Gray hairs are just starting to streak through her dark brown hair that she wears in a bun high on top of her head.

Although she stands in front and center of her students, she never directs them what to think or do. She explains a lot about the old world for those too young to really remember. Although Mrs. Savitri does much of the talking, she always leaves opportunities for students to ask questions and make comments. Her goal is simply to try to preserve the past, and move forward as much as possible. From the beginning, the village members accept her as an unofficial leader. She is both knowledgeable about the past, but wants to always think about the future.

Our predecessors termed this part of the human brain as the amygdala. Abnormal humans, like you and I, have a functional amygdala. She reaches her arm upwards and extends a finger to point to the diagram of the human brain. This part of the brain mediates fear responses such as a startled reaction, and vigilance. It also has a lot to do with aggression, memory, and emotional responses. It is difficult to trace a specific cause for the violent and sociopathic behaviors of the new humans. However, the brains of these new humans display an increased amygdala, and a larger ventral tegmental area. As you may recall, this part of the brain regulates pleasure and pain. Although one may presume an enlarged amygdala would increase fear responses, there seems to be, in all the cases I have observed and studied, damage to the central nucleus; hence it is not functional in that regard. Furthermore, their lack of empathy and often ruthless behavior may be due to the increase in the pleasure and pain center of the brain. Instead of acting separately, the two centers often go hand-in-hand. She starts pacing back and forth looking at the floor as if her deep thoughts and knowledge got ahead of her and she is trying to retrace her steps to catch up. The scans reveal these areas of the brain become active during violent situations. These new humans seem to enjoy what we find painful. In short, they are more aggressive, but have unusual emotional reactions and inappropriate affects. I am afraid to say they are hardwired to dominate and destroy. She takes a sip of water from her glass. Most of the ice has already melted.

Mrs. Savitri? One student blurts.

Yes, Grace.

Should we worry about these kinds of people coming here?

No. Don’t worry. They have no desire to explore the world. Although they are the ones to change, or evolve as some may say, they have lost so many qualities that humans in the past, and people like us possess.

Another student eagerly raises his hand.

Yes Russell, do you have a question?

What qualities have they lost?

That is an excellent question. She begins as she lets her thin yet toned arms do much of the talking. I have told you all about the theories, and what brain regions are affected. Yet, I failed to tell you how these people differ from us emotionally and behaviorally. Sadly, many humans have changed. Their evolution has left them empty, void of culture. In their world, no work routine exists. The notion of friends and neighbors is unheard of. They do not laugh and smile during games. They do not feel true love or peace. Although they have changed, a lot of the ancient human qualities are gone.

How can people just become like that without experiencing past traumas? An older student in the back shouts.

We only have the limited samples from the scans and experiments that I have told you about. I guess we are still in a learning process to understand just how such affected regions can account for such drastic changes in behaviors. We have little background information to go by. We have failed in that area. We don’t really know these people at a personal level. We have had few chances to conduct extensive interviews. She starts pacing back and forth again. The rapid shift in memory and behavior is proof that one’s neurology is a powerful predictor of one’s behavior. While their amygdala is larger, sensory information seems to channel, or process at an average rate. Therefore, we know these new humans have plenty of processing time before they become violent.

Savitri pauses for a moment to look around at the class. Sometimes she gets ahead of herself, and needs to take a moment to interpret the facial expressions of her students.

I can see there is still some confusion as to what functions associate with specific brain regions. Who can explain some of the important functions of the prefrontal cortex? She scans the audience with an inquisitive expression.

Russell, the avid student, throws both arms into the air. When Savitri calls on him, he is quick to add a few more big words to confuse some of the students even more. The prefrontal cortex deals with higher and more complex cognitive processes.

Savitri waits for a moment after he finishes. She hopes he will elaborate or explain more by what he means. When she can tell he is finished, she continues. Thank you Russell. You are right the prefrontal cortex does deal with complex processes. Some of these processes include decision making, judgment, perceptions of emotions, executive functioning skills such as organizing, and setting long-term goals. This last part may go hand-in-hand with memory. These people can form new memories, and they can set goals. However, the goals they set are based on what motivates them. They are thrill seekers and they are hungry for power and control. This is their primary motivation. I am afraid they are the most evil kind of monsters out there. They are more prone to violent outbursts. However, they don’t often act psychotically, and become violent in an instant’s rage. Instead, they are often meticulous, careful, and deliberate. Sadly, it seems many of these people simply are who they are instead of become that way due to underlying emotional issues from past traumas.

• • •

Balloons in bundles dot the shore. People speak over one another loudly, and laughs echo across the water. Every member of the town seems to agree that it is a day to celebrate. They quickly gather as the man with one arm is thrown into the sea. Three men carry his dead body to the end of the long pier and simply drop it into the depths of the ocean. The people chant a chorus of joyous melodies as they watch the waves sweep the body out into the endless cold sea. Here, death is a reason to commemorate.

John Flayer and Steve Doppel sit on a pile of rocks a short distance away from the masses. The rocks are at a