Pathway to the Moon

By Doreen Kerry

Doreen Kerry's lifelong passion has been to lose herself in the romance of the movies, a passion she shared for many years with her late mother. Now she has written a memoir in which she imagines herself travelling back with the aid of H G Wells' time machine to meet and perform with the stars, from Judy Garland to Katharine Hepburn and from Humphrey Bogart to Clark Gable. "Consider it more a memoir than an autobiography - an intimate insight into my feelings and emotions as not portrayed anywhere else; times in my life that cannot be rewritten; history in the making."

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mereo Books
• Release date: Feb 27, 2018
• ISBN: 9781861518668

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Copyright © 2018 by Doreen Kelly

Doreen Kerry has asserted her right under the Copyright Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Published by Mereo

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This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not by way of trade or otherwise be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover, other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition, including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

ISBN: 978-1-86151-866-8

This book is dedicated to my husband (1958-2012), who has left a footprint in my heart that can never be erased, and to one special lady who I was proud to call Mum (1934-2014).

Contents

Preface

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Mad Date One: Time on my hands

Mad Date Two: Commercial break-up

Mad Date Three: Dopey and Mouthpiece

Mad Date Four: Crime Passionnel

Mad Date Five: Typecast

Mad Date Six: Let me call you sweetheart

Mad Date Seven: Reel Estate

Mad Date Eight: Come whine with me

Mad Date Nine: Virtual romance

Mad Date Ten: Don’t call me Camille

Mad Date Eleven: Essence of time

Mad Date Twelve: The Final Frontier

Mad Date Thirteen: Penny Serenade

PREFACE

If it is true that mighty oaks from little acorns grow, then this little acorn came from the strongest trees in the whole forestry world – my parents. Throughout life they were both my strength and my shield, and without them l do not think I could have stood the test of time.

Writing this, my first book, has put me on the path to destiny. It has helped to pull me out of the doldrums – an apt expression, in fact, since I have set out to take my readers on a voyage of discovery whilst I have been grieving (in the wrong order). But then again, why be normal?

This is a light-hearted look at how my life was before it was all Gone with the Wind – ironic, since it involved me hopping in and out of my own customised time machine and flitting from one film set to another in an imaginary world at the time when I had all life's treasures in the palm of my hand.

I cannot change what happened and my grief can never be erased, but in spite of having lost the love of my life, and others that were dear to me, I refuse to let the world make me hard.

Have a look inside and laugh with me if you will, as I have done in the face of adversity. Whilst I have had many a philosophical moan along the way I am seeking unbiased opinions that I have not gone absolutely potty.

Whether you are a film buff or not, I am confident there will be a little bit of you tucked nicely away among the words in the paragraphs which are set not to dampen but to uplift the spirit as I raise a glass to the man to whom this book is dedicated and who never got to know the half of what he married. Indeed he had a lucky escape.

Acknowledgments

The references to films in this book are based on the fact that I have at some time watched them all and therefore feel justified that I can cite them in this way, in no particular order.

Gone with the Wind (1939)

The Time Machine (1960)

Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)

Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid (1982)

The Road to Bali (1952)

Scrooge (1951)

The Great St Trinian’s Train Robbery (1966)

Psycho (1960)

The Man in the Iron Mask (1968)

Shirley Valentine (1989)

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (written 1865)

Alice Through the Looking Glass (written 1891)

Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)

Murder on the Orient

Express (1974)

Zulu (1964)

Enigma (2001)

You’ve Got Mail (1998)

The Diary of Anne Frank (1959)

Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Pearl Harbour (2001)

Big (1988)

Albert RN (1953)

Reach for the Sky (1956)

Wizard of Oz (1939)

Home Alone (1990)

Charlie and the

Chocolate Factory (2005)

Casablanca (1942)

Now Voyager (1942)

Mr Skeffington (1944)

The Old Maid (1939)

The Letter (1940)

Dark Victory (1939)

Gettysburg (1993)

Glory (1989)

Bhowani Junction (1956)

Waterloo Bridge (1940)

The Railway Children (1970)

By the Light of the Silvery

Moon (1953)

On Moonlight Bay (1951)

Brief Encounter (1945)

Titanic (1997)

Patch Adams (1998)

Houseboat (1958)

Father Goose (1964)

Pinocchio (1940)

The Light in the Piazza (1962)

Random Harvest (1942)

The Roman Spring of Mrs Stone (1961)

Raintree County (1957)

Introduction

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears,

the figure she carries or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes,

because that is the doorway to her heart, the place

where love resides.

The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but the

true beauty of a woman is reflected in her soul.

It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that

she shows, and the beauty of a woman with passing

years only grows. –

Audrey Hepburn, 1929-1993

Many a time I have looked at the life of a movie star and wanted that glitz and glamour for myself. Oh to have been a part of MGM – the studio that had more stars than there were in heaven! A world where hour-glass figures were the norm, with clothes that caressed every voluptuous curve and where the ‘peek-a-boo’ hair style made famous by Veronica Lake was emulated most famously by Lauren Bacall and the platinum Hollywood blondes who personified a sheer sophistication that is difficult to match these days.

I have never been on a film set, but I should hope that if the opportunity ever arose, I could sweet-talk the camera crew into letting me go behind the scenes so I could get in on the action. Since this is very unlikely, I hope the creation of this book will allow me to put myself in the driving seat so that I can magically transport myself and my readers back through the golden age of the cinema, television and those classic movies.

There may be times when I become over-enthusiastic with ideas and go into overdrive, as it were, so permission is granted to whack on the literary handbrake at any point in time and price it up for the next car boot sale!

H G Wells was not the only one who had a time machine; so do I, except that mine is in my head. Where I choose to end up and with whom is anyone’s guess. In the world of entertainment, anything is possible.

I seek to recruit an audience that shares my great passion for such dreams, but if, like the dumb actress working towards a part in a movie who has slept with the writer instead of the producer, then please exit the stage right now, as you just won’t get me any more than I get you.

If, on the other hand, like me (and my old mate Dorothy), you are forever seeking lemon drops way above the chimney tops, then join me on a magical ride across the rainbow as I strive to cut my journalistic teeth here and on the ‘net.’

My illusions of grandeur on the silver screen or when floating around Tinseltown in some disguise or another may warrant your forgiveness, but for all my playfulness and creative ingenuity there will be a serious message to be found here, if you care to read between the lines.

So pull up a comfortable armchair with matching footstool, fasten your seat belt and join me on a hopefully not too bumpy ride as we orbit through Universal Studios and beyond, in a totally ridiculous way.

January 2018

As the keen scrap-booker from my youth is left behind, my creative journey is set to begin, and armed with plenty of imagination, nostalgia, humour and inspiration, I set forth. I cannot promise this book will be a work of art, but hopefully it will entertain the mind of anyone who happens to stumble upon it by chance.

Consider it more a memoir than an autobiography – an intimate insight into my feelings and emotions as not portrayed anywhere else; times in my life that cannot be rewritten; history in the making.

Who knows, maybe some famous publisher will make a fortunate discovery of me on ebay whilst looking for reading material that is entirely different and I will become someone’s serendipitous find. No doubt the words ‘sex’, ‘money’ or ‘free’ in the search bar would guarantee far more interest than the random title I have created here today. Yet it bothers me not, as once I get into my imaginary time machine (parked up in the corner of my living room), I shall not be deterred.

The gearbox has a four-speed manual transmission – an advanced version of Mr Wells’ iconic time machine in the story by the same name. As I pull on the gear stick that comes horizontally out of the dashboard, much like that of my sister’s old Citroen Dyane in the early 80s, I am looking forward to my first adventure. Having made a column change through from first to fourth gear, I take off in a most disorderly fashion. As I watch, the Yankee candle in the corner of the room melts in a matter of seconds and a small snail scampers across my laminate flooring. I am on my way.

Having shot through the open door of my conservatory and being now in orbit, I can see the sun and moon bouncing back