Leave No Loose Ends

By Julli Wakefield

What is the meaning of destiny? Does your soul decide its lessons before incarnation? Does divine timing exist or are the major events in your life due to your choices? The author explores all of these choices throughout a tumultuous and emotional time in her life, when she had to let go of all control and just trust in the Universe. Her life depended on it.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Julli Wakefield
• Release date: Sep 8, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370353613

Julli Wakefield

What you ingest can either literally harm you or heal you. Everything happens for a reason. There is no such thing as a coincidence. We are all immortal souls in fragile shells - from One by Richard Bach Sometimes paradise isn't about perfection - from The Awakening by Jeffrey Pierce

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LEAVE NO LOOSE ENDS

By Julli Wakefield

Dedicated to Uncle John

I wish I had another chance to say I’m sorry

I love you

Leave no Loose Ends

Names are intentionally left out of this book; the only exception is if someone is deceased. I did this so that people would not be recognizable and I did not need to use pseudonyms. Everything in this book is true and I did not want to deviate from that.

Table of Contents

ACCIDENTS HAPPEN

WHIRLWIND

HOW IT ALL BEGAN

FINDING FATE

LUCKY, SO VERY LUCKY

LOST TIME

HOW I WON ROUND ONE

CALM BEFORE THE STORM

THE WAVES KEEP CRASHING

A DREAM REALIZED

THE KEY

THE WRATH OF WILMA

AFTER THE STORM

THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS

LEAVE NO LOOSE ENDS

OUT OF MY HANDS

ONE PRICK, TWO PRICK

TIME IS RUNNING OUT

NO CHOICES BUT A BAD ONE

FOUR DAYS ALONE WITH MY THOUGHTS

INTENSE

ULTIMATE DISCRIMINATION

THERE IS NO FEBRUARY 29TH

SO SIMPLE

THREE WEEKS TURN INTO THREE MONTHS

ACCIDENTS HAPPEN

Mine happened on a summer day like any other. Such a beautiful day in Florida without overwhelming heat and humidity, for which August is infamous. I wish I had heeded my instincts, which screamed that day was different. If I had known that by evening my world would turn upside down I would have done something different like taken an alternate route or stopped at the gas station. That morning I considered both ideas and then dismissed both because I simply wanted to get home. The urgency I felt that morning had faded with the sunrise.

Most accidents happen within five miles of home and mine was literally around the corner. While I cruised along a three-lane road in the far left lane, I kept in mind the traffic light a block ahead where I planned to turn left. I drove this road every day and I knew the signal timing for when it changed to red. Right now though, a green traffic light kept the traffic flowing. I intended to make a left turn at the intersection ahead. An empty road in front of me for the remainder of the block offered assurance for just how easy this would be.

I bet the driver of the Escalade thought so, too? She saw the open space and wanted to take advantage of it. She made a very sharp right on red turn and cut across the road into my lane. My car was in the far inside lane. Did she even see me? Suddenly an Escalade was directly in front of me, which dwarfed my little Mirage. The open road in front of me no longer existed and I was driving 45 mph.

I knew there would be an impact and I could do absolutely nothing about it. What a powerless feeling. Many thoughts ran through my mind in those two seconds before the impact. The loudest thought was that I didn't want to directly rear-end her, which possibly would have landed me in the backseat of the Escalade.

I suddenly yanked the steering wheel to the left hoping for the best scenario, which was for an impact on the passenger side. However, that option never materialized. The median was on my left with the oncoming traffic on the other side of it. I barely had enough time to hit the brakes hard and jerk the wheel to the right.

Oh Jesus, I prayed. Please don't let my car crumple in. I immediately braced for the impact. I will never forget the screech of the metal twisting and the glass breaking. The air-bags inflated with a hissing sound and my seatbelt tightened as the entire side of my little Mirage caved in. Everything moved in slow motion.

I came to a stop wedged between two cars. The powder released by the airbags created a fog inside the car making it difficult to breathe. I gasped from the adrenalin pumping through my body. Slowly the realization of what just happened dawned on me. The combination of fear and relief brought forth sobs as I realized I was alive and breathing. I don't know how long it was before other drivers came over and asked, Are you okay? Do you need medical assistance? I was close to going into shock. I could not stop shaking and breathing in gasps, so of course I didn't answer them.

Surprisingly, no other drivers stopped. Everyone just kept going about his or her business. Traffic reduced to one lane because the accident took up most of the road. I counted six police cruisers and a couple ambulances and fire engines. Later I found out that a friend drove past the accident scene. She never realized one of the vehicles involved was mine, because she could not see around all of the emergency vehicles.

She is so lucky. It could have been a lot worse, and She is lucky to be coming out of that car in one piece, I overheard the EMTs comment. At that moment I felt both lucky and unlucky. I did not want to get out of my car just yet, even after the passenger side door was pried open. I only remember that I kept shaking my head and saying She cut me off. She cut me off.

I wasn't bleeding and nothing appeared to be broken so I declined medical treatment. I didn't know it at the time, but the real pain would begin the following day. A police officer helped me crawl out of my car and into the back of a cruiser to wait for a tow truck. I realized then that the distance from the corner where the Escalade cut in front of me to where the impact happened was about 50 feet. Fifty feet passes by quickly at 45 mph.

I never saw my car that day from the driver side. Only the passenger side, where it looked like a simple fender bender had happened. Later I realized this was a good thing. Emotions washed over me as I watched the tow truck take my car away. One of the police officers was kind enough to give me a ride home. My thinking was not clear enough to even call a friend to pick me up. I was not issued a citation and I do not think the other driver was. Under Florida law it was a no-fault accident. In other words, no fault was given to either me or the other driver as no witnesses ever came forward with their version of the accident.

That car accident was the finale in a chain of previous events, which cumulated with my return to Missoula. Without it I am sure I would not be writing my story. I said I wanted to, but being in Florida left me without the time or attention to devote to it. At least I claimed that was the reason. I learned the importance of making good use of your time because you truly don't know how much time you have left. I know that better than most people.

WHIRLWIND

Exhaustion reigned during the weeks following the accident. The first morning I felt as though I had been repeatedly beaten. Every muscle ached and the simple act of breathing hurt. I called work and explained why I wouldn't be in that day. The accident kept replaying over and over in my mind which resulted in restless sleep the night before. The accident still haunts me in my dreams from time to time. The screech of the metal twisting and bending makes up my nightmares.

I saw my car for the first time at the towing yard that afternoon. The extent of the damage was shocking. My car looked like the vehicle you see in the commercials used for shock value or the wreck on the evening news. Only this time it was my car and I had been in that car.

OH MY GOD. Nausea swept over me while I choked out the words. The entire driver side of my car was smashed in and both front tires faced inward, like a V. The driver’s side door showed the worst damage. At that moment I fully grasped how incredibly lucky I really was. Now I understood the EMTs comments at the accident scene. It did not take an expert to know my car was a complete loss, and a couple days later the insurance company deemed it totaled.

The next day I decided to return to Montana to recover. In Missoula I would be surrounded with my family’s love and support and it would take a load off my shoulders, both mentally and financially. The thought had been on my mind since the accident