Tug: A Love and Second Chances Novel

By Katherine Glick

“Have you ever had that feeling? The feeling that fate is working its way into your life, and is about to drop the mother of all bombs right on top of you? It sort of feels like a pull, like a little tug on your heart and soul. When you feel that you just know that something major is about to happen, and fate is about to change your life forever. The only question is, will it be for the good, or for the bad?”

-Alex

When Alex Plummer suddenly became a widow and a single mother at the young age of thirty, she swore she’d never love another man again. The pain from losing her husband had broken her heart beyond repair.

But she carried on and remained strong for her son. With time, she learned how to live a functional life again. She had everything she needed. A loving son, a promising career, and a best friend that put others to shame. And there was no room for anything or anyone else in her life. Period.

Alex’s controlled lifestyle was contested when she met Nicky, her best friend’s cousin. They quickly realized their attraction to one another was different and beyond control.

Like Alex, Nicky suffered a loss when his fiancé dumped him after his hockey career ended. He vowed to be alone so that he could heal from the pain of his breakup. He wasn’t going to let another woman wreck his life again.

When Alex and Nicky’s lives collided, they realized they had one thing in common...heartache. However, they were too stubborn to admit that they wanted and needed each other. Alex wasn’t looking to fill a void, so she closed her heart off. And Nicky didn’t want to trust another woman, so the idea of a relationship wasn’t even on his radar. They were determined to keep a safe distance from one another.

But Fate had other ideas in mind for Alex and Nicky. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn’t go their separate ways.

Can Alex and Nicky overcome their hurtful pasts, and accept love into their hearts again? Or will they continue to build walls to keep each other out?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Katherine Glick
• Release date: Aug 28, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370928095

Katherine Glick

Katherine Glick was born and raised in North Carolina, and currently resides near Wilmington, NC. She's a wife, mother, and a southern girl at heart. Katherine loves to write and use her imagination to create magic on a page. Romance is her genre of choice when it comes to writing and reading, however, she dabbles in a little science fiction and historical fiction every now and then. When she's not furiously typing away on her laptop, she's spending time with her precious family, reading, exercising, enjoying the great outdoors, eating tasty food, and drinking delicious wine.

Book preview

Tug

Copyright © 2016 by Katherine Glick

All Rights Reserved

Prologue

It happened in an instant. My life as I knew it was turned upside down. Not just upside down, my life was torn apart, destroyed, and massacred. My husband, my soul mate and best friend, the love of my life, was dead.

They say it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. It’s a beautiful philosophy. I’ve heard it a lot and gave it careful thought. I never believed I’d have to put that theory to test like I did. But life had its own agenda for me, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.

The trauma I endured the night of my husband’s death blurred my memory. I can’t recall much of the details, but I remember how I felt. The pain was unbearable. I’ve never been stabbed by a knife, shot with a gun, or impaled by a sword. I’d probably never know how that felt. But the pain I suffered that night was one hundred times worse than all those combined. I’m certain of it.

It was around eight on a Wednesday evening in October. I was preparing our son, Dylan, for bed because Aaron, my husband, had a soccer game that night. Typically, Dylan and I attended his games, but it was a late one, so we stayed home.

Aside from work, Aaron rarely went anywhere without Dylan and me. The three of us were almost inseparable. However, every once in a while, he’d go play ball, hunt, go fishing, or do whatever he needed to do to feel like a man. We didn’t have too many friends. We had our families, and that’s all that mattered to us. As long as we had each other, our lives were complete.

As I let our dog, Brutus, out to pee, I took note of the slight chill in the air. I could feel the promise of fall. It was the kind of weather that put everyone in a great mood. Southerners are always more pleasant when the weather finally turns from sticky and hot to cool.

October was a prime month for fall in most places, but not where we lived. Wilmington, NC stayed warm until January. We wore shorts and t-shirts on Christmas day. However, this particular night was cooler, crisp, and agreeable.

I took a deep breath of the chilly air and stayed outside longer than usual to enjoy the night. I could see Dylan through the window playing with his toys in the living room. He looked happy and content. He was in his pajamas. His hair was wet from his bath and combed neatly to the side. I smiled to myself thinking of how cool a kid he was. So easy going and charismatic, with an infectious personality. He got that from Aaron. Aaron could charm the pants off anyone.

The smell of fresh lumber invaded my nostrils as I stood on our newly constructed back deck. I looked up to the clear, star-strewn sky, and each glowing orb of light twinkled back at me. I thought about how much I wanted Aaron with me at that very moment; to gaze with me, and enjoy the enchantment of Mother Nature. We would probably comment on how beautiful the night was, and steal a quick hug and kiss before going back inside. That would be it. Nothing more. We had a small child to tend to, so our alone time was brief, and often interrupted. Thank God, we still managed to have a sex life.

Aaron and I met in college and had an instant attraction to one another. We dated throughout school, graduated, and decided to get married. There was no hesitation or concern over being so young. We knew we wanted to be with each other for the rest of our lives…end of story. We were two lovebirds who were inseparable.

When I got pregnant with Dylan, our lives changed, but only for the better. We calmed down and became more responsible. Once Dylan was born, we had a few struggles with money, careers, and with parenting. It was nothing we couldn’t handle though. We worked through it all together as a solid team unit.

Before walking back inside with our dog, I glanced up to the sky once more. I felt a tug. It wasn’t a real tug, but something pulled at my heart. And it wasn’t the good tug at your heartstrings kind of feeling. This felt wrong and off. It felt like a warning. Goosebumps covered my skin as I tried to put my finger on what made me feel that way.

Uneasiness suddenly washed over me. About what, I couldn’t say. I brushed it off, thinking I had a little too much wine that evening, so I shut the door and thought nothing more of it.

As I passed through the kitchen, I chuckled when I saw the nearly empty bottle of wine on the counter. The vino was definitely the reason for the weird feeling. I looked at my phone to check the time and saw I missed a text message from Aaron.

Hmm, how did I miss that? I asked myself.

Aaron’s message said he’d be home in a little bit. The field where they played was only about ten minutes away, so I expected him back any minute.

Dylan and I retired to his room after cleaning up and brushing his teeth. I dutifully read him three very long books. The child was unyielding when it came to his bedtime stories. It didn’t bother me, though. I loved spending the time with him.

So, after reading yet another book, I was beginning to get tired, and Dylan wasn’t going to sleep. I was also starting to wonder where Aaron was. It had been over an hour since I received his message. I thought maybe he got caught up in conversation at the field or stopped by the store on his way home, but he usually kept me updated to let me know what was going on.

Ever since we had Dylan, we kept each other in the loop about everything. Aaron and I cared about our little family so much, and that meant we always kept each other in check.

I had my phone with me in Dylan’s room, so I called him to find out where he was. It rang and then went to his voicemail. I didn’t leave a message. I never did because he never checked them. I shot off a quick text letting him know I was concerned that he wasn’t home yet. Thirty minutes later still no response from him. My worry intensified.

Not wanting Dylan to pick up on my increasing anxiety, I returned my full attention to him. I put the book we were reading away, and we started to talk about what he wanted to be for Halloween. Sometimes just talking helped him relax and fall asleep. Four hugs and ten kisses later, he was finally settling down.

Once Dylan fell into his milk induced sleep, my concern about Aaron not being home increased ten-fold. It’d been over three hours since he sent his text saying he was on his way home. He never went that long without communication. I was seconds away from calling the police to report him missing when I heard a knock at the door.

Knock, knock, knock.

I jumped because it was so loud in our quiet home. I didn’t like that knock. It sounded serious. It could have been because I was already on edge, but I just knew that knock had a hidden meaning. I hesitated, unsure of what to do. I was too afraid to move, so I stood there frozen.

Knock, knock, knock.

Mrs. Plummer? This is Deputy Sheriff Williams from the New Hanover County Sheriff’s Department. Are you there? Can you answer the door please ma’am?

I gasped. No, no, no. Something wasn’t right. I could hear it in the heavy tone of the man’s voice. My face grew hot, and my heart rate increased.

I slowly made my way to the door. I was terrified at what would be waiting for me on the other side. I almost couldn’t bring myself to answer the door. To me, ignorance was bliss.

I laughed at myself. I was acting silly. This had nothing to do with Aaron. He’d be coming home soon, and there would be nothing to worry about.

Take a deep breath Alex, it’s going to be ok, I said to myself.

I looked through the peephole and saw two deputies on the other side. Just as the man was about to knock again, I unlocked the deadbolt, and slowly turned the knob to open the door. I studied the two men who’s heads were lowered. Their hats were off and in their hands, and they were fidgeting.

Williams looked up at me with great sadness in his eyes. I brought my shaky hand to my mouth to suffocate the whimpers that were trying to escape. I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. I began to tremble, scared of what they were about to say. Something told me it was about Aaron, but I didn’t know the seriousness of the situation.

Williams shifted on his feet and looked up at me. Mrs. Plummer?

Yes? My voice was weak, and I had a hard time meeting his eyes.

Mrs. Plummer, I’m so sorry to tell you this, but ma’am… he hesitated and lowered his eyes. Um, Mrs. Plummer, I’m sorry, but your husband has been in a car accident.

I felt the blood drain from my face. My skin got cold and clammy. A salty taste invaded my mouth, and I felt like I was going to vomit.

Oh God is he…? I could barely find my voice to ask the question because I was petrified at what his response would be. Is he ok?

Williams looked up and met my eyes. His face was white as a sheet, and he was sweating profusely. My eyes widened, and I shook my head back and forth. My gut told me I wouldn’t like what he had to say.

Ma’am, I’m terribly sorry, but... he paused, and took a deep breath. Mrs. Plummer, your husband didn’t make it. He died at the scene of the accident.

His voice cracked with his last statement. I could tell he was beside himself - like he never delivered that kind of news before.

I swear my heart stopped. I just knew I was going to die right then and there from a heart attack. I was shocked and stunned. I couldn’t move or make a sound. My eyes blurred, and I didn’t know what to say or do. It couldn’t be true. Aaron would be home any minute. I was sure of it.

I thought I was dreaming, but I knew better. So many emotions hit me at once. I wanted to scream, but nothing would come out. My legs gave out, and I fell to the floor. Williams rushed to my side and cradled me as I sobbed.

I’m so sorry, he repeated. Is there anyone we can call?

At that moment anger washed over me. How dare these people come to my house that late at night with such a story? That’s what it was to me, a story…a lie. It just wasn’t true.

I tried to push him away from me. Get out! I screamed.

His hold was firm, and he wouldn’t let go. In hindsight, I’m glad he didn’t. I might have hit or punched something. Him maybe - he was the closest to me.

You’ve made a mistake, I cried. My husband is on his way home. He’ll be here any minute. Leave my house now, I commanded.

The look on William’s face when I said that would break anyone’s heart, because, at that moment, I was sure I broke his.

Mrs. Plummer, I can’t leave you here. Not until we call someone to help you, he said softly. He had the patience of a saint.

As I was about to protest, Dylan came out of his bedroom and rubbed his sleepy eyes. Mommy, what’s wrong?

I quickly dried my eyes and stood on shaky legs. Dylan approached me slowly. He knew something wasn’t right.

Mommy, when is daddy coming home? I miss him.

I almost lost it. The pain was unreal. Knowing Dylan would never see his father again tore me up inside. I could hardly breathe. I was trembling, and trying to control my emotions in front of him.

The other deputy couldn’t take it. He excused himself and walked outside. I looked out and saw his shoulders shaking as he covered his face with his hands. Williams noticed I was watching, and he quickly closed our front door.

Everything is going to be ok, Dill Pickle. I promise. I reassured him the best I could.

Mommy, I’m scared. Who is he? He gestured towards Deputy Williams standing in the front hallway. I want daddy, he whimpered.

Dylan… I started to speak but paused to control my shaky voice. My mouth was dry as cotton.

Dylan, something has happened. I need you to be a big boy for Mommy, and let me talk to this man for a bit, ok? I’ll turn on the TV for you to watch, and get you some milk.

I settled Dylan in front of the TV and went back to Deputy Williams. I need to call my mother-in-law. Can you help me? I was too distraught and didn’t have the strength to tell Jane the news. To think about it broke my heart, which had already been shattered into a million pieces.

Yes ma’am. I can help you call her, he said gently. Mrs. Plummer, I know this is hard for you, but we will need you to identify the body as soon as you can.

I nodded, and from that moment on, my mind was gone. I felt beside myself like I wasn’t in my body. I couldn’t grasp anything that was going on. I sat on the floor against the wall near the front door. I didn’t trust my wobbly legs to stand on.

Fat, silent tears poured from my eyes. I was so afraid Dylan would be frightened to see me upset, so I exercised astonishing control over my emotions, and privately mourned my husband.

So many thoughts, feelings, and memories of Aaron invaded my mind. Denial, fear, worry, anger, and sadness all crowded my brain at once. I felt like my head was going to explode. I was lost and felt unbelievably alone.

I didn’t know what to do. I needed Jane to hurry. I needed to hear her comforting voice. She would know what to do, and how to make the pain go away. I knew in my mind life was fragile, and my loved ones could be taken from me in an instant. I just never thought it would actually happen to me.

Why did you have to go, Aaron? I want you back, I whispered. Williams must have heard me because he placed a comforting arm around my shoulders.

After Jane had arrived, we held each other and cried. I couldn’t imagine a mother losing a son. I knew she was going through a different kind of pain, but she was strong for Dylan and me. Aaron’s stepfather, Hank, drove us to the hospital so we could identify the body.

As we arrived, we were taken down to the morgue where they explained to us what happened to Aaron. He was on his way home and was driving on a two-lane road. A truck coming the opposite way crossed the line and hit him head-on.

There was no time for the oncoming vehicle to correct themselves, and Aaron had no time to swerve out of the way. It was just a crazy, ear-piercing explosion of glass and metal. Aaron died at the scene of the accident. The other person didn’t make it either.

Looking back, I thought I’d felt the accident the moment it happened. Perhaps, it was the moment I looked up into the inky sky just hours before and felt that ominous tug.

He didn’t feel any pain, Mrs. Plummer, they said. He died instantly from the impact.

Everyone kept talking, explaining, and reassuring. I’d heard enough. My anger intensified, and I had a hard time controlling my emotions. Why did this happen to me…to Dylan? I wanted to scream at everyone and tell them to shut up. I didn’t care anymore about the facts and statistics. I just wanted to see my husband.

Finally, the coroner called for me to identify Aaron’s body. Dylan stayed behind with his Gigi (Jane) who amazingly managed to control her emotions in front of him. As I left the room, I could hear his protests. He didn’t want me to leave him.

My poor baby must have been so scared, but he was a brave boy and let me go. He didn’t fully understand what was going on. I had no clue how to tell him his father was never coming back. It tore me apart to think about it.

I was in a thick, suffocating fog as the coroner led me down a hallway. We stopped in front of a heavy steel door, and then we entered a cold, gray room. I took a deep breath to prepare myself for what I was about to see. The coroner walked over to a body lying on a gurney, and he pulled the sheet back to reveal a face. At that moment my nightmare became my reality. It was Aaron.

And then, as if a thousand lightning strikes hit me all at once, I collapsed to the floor. I couldn’t breathe. I was stunned, shocked, and silenced. I couldn’t tell you how long I sobbed uncontrollably on that gritty, tiled floor, but finally, I came to.

Mrs. Plummer, is there anything I can do? The coroner crouched beside me and placed a hand on my shoulder.

I yanked my arm away from him. Leave me alone, I hissed. I couldn’t help my rude behavior.

He looked at me with pity in his eyes as I stared back at him with hatred in mine. My ire wasn’t meant for him necessarily, but for the situation I suddenly found myself in. I wanted to be angry with everyone, and everything.

I wanted to hit, punch, and scream at whoever, or whatever got in my way. I needed someone to blame for Aaron’s tragic death. However, I knew that wasn’t the way to live. Bad things happened all the time and are sometimes out of our control. I had no choice but to accept it.

The coroner gave me a curt nod, turned on his heel, and left the room. Finally, I was alone with my love. I let all of my emotions go in that room. I cried and cried, and let the tears flow. I had to because the moment I left, I’d have to be strong for Dylan. I couldn’t let him see me fall apart.

I remember looking down at my husband’s lifeless body and thanked God I was able to see him one last time. I still had a hard time processing everything that happened, and I knew I probably needed to be treated for shock. But that didn’t matter because I was with him.

He was cleaned up a little, but I could see the deep bruises, cuts, and the remaining dried blood that covered him. There was a deep gash above his right eye.

How are you gone, my love? You don’t look that hurt, I whispered to him.

But I knew he was broken on the inside and couldn’t be fixed. I had the same diagnosis. My tears continued to find their escape as I touched, caressed, and kissed my beautiful husband. I’d never see his contagious smile, and loving green eyes looking at me again.

I was hurting so badly. I clutched my chest, hoping to find the knife that was twisting its way through my heart. I didn’t think I could go on living without him. I just wanted to die to be with him once again. But there was a small light still left in me, so I continued to breathe.

I hoped Aaron was in a peaceful place. I hoped he would never be alone. And I hoped he never had any regrets in this lifetime. As I stood with him that final time, I studied his face and body. I didn’t want to forget any freckle or scar that graced his precious skin.

And then I prayed. I prayed to any God that would listen for my husband’s spirit to live on. I prayed he lived on in me, in my son, and in all living things on this Earth.

My sobs had eased, and my swollen eyes had dried. I draped my body over Aaron’s and whispered the sweetest words and promises to him. I wanted him to know that there would never be another man for me as long as I lived, and I would never let him go in my heart. I promised I would take care of our son until I took my last breath. Even though I knew Aaron couldn’t hear me, I hoped somehow the messages would get through.

I’ve heard people say it’s possible to die from a broken heart. I was skeptical before, but after losing Aaron, I knew it could happen. I almost died with my husband that night. My only saving grace, the small light still inside me, was our four-year old son. I couldn’t, and wouldn’t leave him alone in this cruel world. He needed me, hell, he needed his father. But despite all the pain and fear, I was determined to be strong for my child.

I picked my bleeding heart up off the floor and put it back in place. I gave Aaron a final kiss goodbye and told him I loved him. I arose and began my journey back to the outside world. I reached for the door and stole one final glance. The lights above flickered ever so slightly, and I knew it was him telling me everything would be okay, and my messages were clear.

"Bye for now, my love. This isn’t the end."

I held my hand over my wildly beating heart. I wouldn’t see Aaron again in this lifetime, but I had to believe we’d reunite one day. Finally, I took a deep breath and returned to my son.

We decided to cremate Aaron instead of burying him. We all knew it was what he wanted. On the Saturday after his death, our families came together to spread his ashes over the ocean just off of Oak Island, NC. It was a calm, warm, and sunny day, and I knew Aaron played a role in that. He always loved warm and sunny weather.

The days leading up to Aaron’s memorial made us question a lot of things in life. None of us understood why he had to go. We were devastated, to say the least.

But somehow, we were very much at peace in the boat, and on the water that day. We remembered the exquisite man we loved so dearly. He excelled in all things he did. He was an incredible husband and son, and he loved Dylan with everything he had. He was an inspiration to all the people in his life, and he would be missed by many.

No one could ever live up to that for me…

I took a deep breath of the fresh, salt air, and watched the rays of the sun shimmer and dance over the water. I knew Aaron was with us in spirit, no doubt orchestrating the dazzling light show displayed before us on the water.

As we took the boat in, I looked at my son and decided right then and there we would be ok. There would still be pain and heartache. We’d both at times experience the void of not having Aaron physically in our lives. I would experience the loneliness of not having him by my side. But we’d be ok. Dylan would be ok. I would make certain of that.

My son was my beacon, my savior, and my reason to continue on with life. If I didn’t have him, I would be no more. Nothing in life would matter as much as loving, and protecting my son.

But life does funny things, and as soon as you figure it out, something happens. That something for me was a second chance at love.

Did I want it? No. Did I welcome it? Hell no. Did I try to avoid it with everything in me? That, my friends, is a big YES. But the heart wants what it wants, and there’s not much you can do about it.

I can’t even begin to describe how fate screwed me over when I lost Aaron. I didn’t think I’d ever be myself again, but I never gave up despite the depression and sorrow I felt. Because sometimes you have to hurt and struggle before you can gain, and some of life’s greatest lessons are learned from heartache and pain. Once I accepted that, I could finally live my life again.

Chapter 1

Alex

Two years later…

I stared at my reflection in the full-length mirror hanging on the wall of my bedroom. It was the first time since Aaron’s death that I actually cared about what was going on in that mirror. Anyone who knew me would agree that I reached a significant milestone.

My eyes focused at the top of my head and worked their way down. My dark, auburn hair hung loosely around my shoulders in thick waves. I never paid too much attention to my hair, however, that morning I noticed that it no longer laid flat on my head with an oily sheen to it. I’d actually taken the time to make it look decent with some product, so it was soft and perfectly wavy.

My eyes journeyed over my smooth skin, which was pale with a light dusting of freckles. I hadn’t been out in the sun much lately, but my complexion had a promising glow. Thick lashes fanned over my large, almond shaped, moss green eyes, and for the first time, in a long time, they sparkled.

My gaze continued down to my body, and I noticed I was beginning to put some weight back on. I was wearing a black lace bra and panties set that sat in my drawer since before Aaron was gone. For some reason that day, I felt like I needed to feel the luxuriousness of it against my skin. It made me feel alive and confident.

I turned slightly sideways, and I saw my butt was plumper and firmer than before. My thighs were thick and strong, and I could see the muscle definition from months of lifting weights at the gym. I had also taken up running again. Exercise helped me sort out my feelings, and it was good for the healing process.

After Aaron passed, I couldn’t eat. Obviously, I was sad, depressed, and stressed, and when I get that way I can’t eat crap. I’ve always been an eater. When I was younger, my parents and even my friend’s parents would joke that if I didn’t stop, I would eat them all out of house and home. What can I say? Food makes me happy, and if I’m not happy, it’s just as good as dirt to me.

So needless to say, I had lost a lot of weight in the past year. It killed my family to see me that way because they knew how much I loved food. They really didn’t say too much about it, just hoped I would work it out. I suspected they were all teetering on an intervention if I didn’t straighten up.

It was only a few months ago that I could actually eat a decent meal, and not feel like I wanted to puke it up. With the help of my therapist, a nutritionist, and a personal fitness trainer, I got myself back to a healthy weight. I still had some bad days, but overall I was getting better.

Looking in the mirror, I caught sight of the double hung windows behind me. I paused to study the colossal oak tree that stood in the front yard. I marveled at its massive, twisting branches that reached for the sky as its leaves lightly blew in the wind.

That tree was like a shield for our little home. I felt like it was there to protect us and watch over us. Many days I spent staring at that tree while lying in bed. It was a form of therapy for me. Its old age provided comfort to my aching heart, and the wisdom to sort through my thoughts and feelings.

Our new home in Southport, NC is known for its oak trees. They are breathtaking and majestic. They hold secrets of the past, especially the antique ones like the one in our yard.

Since Aaron was gone, Dylan and I had a hard time living in our house in Wilmington. The house and even the city was full of memories of Aaron, especially for me. So, I asked Dylan if he would be ok to move, and with his easygoing personality, he agreed. He just wanted me to be happy. That’s all that mattered to him.

The house we left behind was our dream home. Aaron and I put so much time and effort into constructing what was to be our permanent home. It was perfect for us. But there was no longer an us, so Dylan and I packed up, and moved to a darling little home in the sleepy harbor town of Southport.

Our attraction to Southport had everything to do with its charm. The mouth of the Cape Fear River and the Atlantic Ocean met at its home front. Dylan and I both loved the idea of living on the water.

It was a laid back, quiet place during the winter, and a crazy touristy vacation spot in the spring and summer. The natives could hardly stand it, but did so with grace and dignity. Local restaurants and boutique shops marked the historic sidewalks, and the people were friendly and inviting. It was the perfect place to heal a broken heart

As a result of Aaron’s accident, I received a large sum of money from a settlement. Turns out, the delivery truck that crashed into Aaron’s vehicle was from a very popular food supplier. I used a portion of the money to purchase our new home, and I put what was left into savings.

Usually, settlements like ours take a while to pan out, but because I had the right lawyers on the case, we became priority. The case was settled in a matter of months. I guess no one wanted to make us suffer more than we had. We all just wanted it to be over with so we could grieve properly.

While the money doesn’t matter, the settlement, along with Aaron’s life insurance, gave me the freedom to make the best decisions for our future. After taking my bereavement leave from my job in sales, I finally decided it was best to quit. I wanted to be one hundred percent available for Dylan. At that point, I finally felt like we could begin our healing process.

Dylan recovered well and was able to accept what had happened to his father. He was still sad, but he seemed to have a positive outlook. I on the other hand, well, there were days I could hardly get out of bed, and could barely interact with others. I was hurting, and the suffering just wouldn’t let up. I didn’t think I’d ever get past the pain of losing Aaron, but I listened to my friends, family, and therapist, and hoped for the best.

Snapping back to reality, I looked at the clock and realized I was running behind. I put on my baby pink, cashmere sweater that came to a V in the front. I pulled on my tight, dark denim jeans, and my dark brown knee high boots.

I didn’t wear many accessories, and never had in the past. They always got in my way. I just wore my wedding rings, and occasionally I would wear a necklace, but nothing else.

After Aaron died, I eventually stopped wearing my rings on my finger. I attached them to a white-gold, rope-styled necklace that when hung around my neck rested close to my heart. Just like Aaron.

It’s not that I didn’t want to wear my rings on my finger anymore, a lot of widows do. But wearing them was a reminder that I was once married to a beautiful man who was taken from us all too soon. So, I opted to keep them close with the necklace.

I stole one more glance in the mirror to make sure I looked ok. I took a few deep breaths to pump up my self-confidence and decided I was a damn good looking thirty-two year old woman. I had no signs of wrinkles or saggy skin, and I still looked like I was in my twenties.

That thought alone boosted my ego, and I decided that nothing or no one could get in my way that day. It was going to be a great day. I felt good, I had an appetite, and I would no longer let the pain of losing Aaron keep me prisoner. He wouldn’t want that for me anyway.

Mommy, Dylan called from the kitchen, Aunt Evie’s here, she just pulled up.

I’m coming, I’m coming. I lollygagged, and now I was flustered trying to get myself ready.

Shit. Of course Evie is early. Can’t a girl get ready without worrying about somebody showing up too early? She’s never late or on time, just always early. It must be a Canadian thing. I’ll have to google that, I muttered under my breath as I lightly spritzed my vanilla scented perfume on my body.

Who are you talking to, Mommy?

Dylan’s