Eliza and Her Monsters

By Francesca Zappia

“A love letter to fandom, friendship, and the stories that shape us, Eliza and Her Monsters is absolutely magical.”—Marieke Nijkamp, New York Times–bestselling author of This Is Where It Ends

Eighteen-year-old Eliza Mirk is the anonymous creator of the wildly popular webcomic Monstrous Sea, but when a new boy at school tempts her to live a life offline, everything she’s worked for begins to crumble.

Rainbow Rowell’s Fangirl meets Noelle Stevenson’s Nimona in this acclaimed novel about art, fandom, and finding the courage to be yourself. “A must-have.”—School Library Journal

In the real world, Eliza Mirk is shy, weird, and friendless. Online, Eliza is LadyConstellation, anonymous creator of a popular webcomic called Monstrous Sea. With millions of followers and fans throughout the world, Eliza’s persona is popular. Eliza can’t imagine enjoying the real world as much as she loves her digital community.

Then Wallace Warland transfers to her school and Eliza begins to wonder if a life offline might be worthwhile. But when Eliza’s secret is accidentally shared with the world, everything she’s built—her story, her relationship with Wallace, and even her sanity—begins to fall apart.

With pages from Eliza’s webcomic, as well as screenshots from Eliza’s online forums, this book will appeal to fans of Noelle Stevenson’s Nimona and Rainbow Rowell’s Fangirl.

Young Adult Library Services Association Best Book

Best Fiction for Young Adults Top Ten

Kirkus Best Book

Texas Tayshas Pick

• Language: English
• Publisher: HarperCollins
• Release date: May 30, 2017
• ISBN: 9780062290151

Francesca Zappia

Francesca Zappia lives in central Indiana. When she is not writing, she’s drawing her characters, reading, or playing video games. She is also the author of Made You Up and Eliza Mirk’s favorite, The Children of Hypnos, a biweekly serial novel posted on Tumblr and Wattpad. She also blogs about writing at francescazappia.com

Book preview

PROLOGUE

Eliza Mirk is the kind of name you give to the creepy girl who clings to her ex-boyfriend for weeks after he’s dumped her because she refuses to accept that he hates her guts. Eliza Mirk is a low-level villain with a secret hideout in the sewers. Eliza Mirk belongs in a comic book.

But Eliza Mirk is me. I don’t think I’m desperate or deluded enough to hang on to an ex-boyfriend after he’s broken up with me, I wouldn’t go near a sewer with a ten-foot pole, and unfortunately I do not live in a comic book. I do live kind of a comic-book life, though, I guess.

I go to school during the day, and at night I cast off my secret identity to become LadyConstellation, creator of one of the internet’s most popular webcomics, Monstrous Sea, and fearless mother of a fandom. My superpower is the ability to draw for hours without realizing what time it is or that I haven’t eaten in too long. I succeed in disappearing in my disguise, and I excel at standing out in my true form.

Why LadyConstellation? you may ask.

Because, I reply, my favorite culture in Monstrous Sea comes from a people who have stars in their blood. These people—Nocturnians—instinctively chart stars. That is their calling in life. That is what they feel they must do, as I feel I must tell their story.

LadyConstellation is the one charting this story, drawing lines between plots and characters and places like the Nocturnians draw connections between stars. She is fearless, like the Nocturnians; she is mysterious and aloof, like the Nocturnians; and like the Nocturnians, she believes in the mystical, the supernatural, and the unknown.

LadyConstellation is the hero who defeats Eliza Mirk once a week and celebrates with her many admiring fans. She is beloved by all, even the villain, because without her the villain wouldn’t exist.

I am LadyConstellation.

I am also Eliza Mirk.

This is the paradox that can never be solved.

Masterminds :: Submind :: Webcomics

THE BEST THING YOU’LL READ TODAY

Posted at 10:46 a.m. on 02-19-2014 by Apocalypse_Cow

go here. read this. thank me later.

http://monstroussea.blogspot.com/

+ 503,830/-453 | 2,446,873 Comments | Reply | Flag

CHAPTER 1

The origin post is open on my computer when I shuffle over to it in the morning. Overnight, another three hundred comments have cropped up. I don’t know what they say anymore—I haven’t checked in months. I know some are from fans. A lot are from trolls. I don’t look at the post for the comments. I look because it is my daily reminder that all of this—all of my life—is a real thing.

My beginning is time-stamped in history.

I smooth down my tangle of hair, yawn, and rub sleep from my eyes. When I blink, the post is still there, sitting happy near the top of the Masterminds subforum for webcomics. You’d think, after two years, it would have fallen. It hasn’t.

I close the browser before I betray my own rules. I do not read comments. Comments are explosives for mental walls, and right now I need those walls up. I open Photoshop to find the file I was working on last night, a half-finished page from Monstrous Sea. All the line work is done. I started on the colors but didn’t finish, and I still need to add the text. Still, I’m ahead of schedule. This will be a whole chapter kind of week. My minimum for each week is one page; usually I average three. I always have something to post.

I skim over the comic page, skipping from panel to panel, double-checking the characters and settings. I lay out the rest of the colors in my head, then the light sources and the shadows. The text. The flow of the action looks okay, but in the bottom panel I drew Amity’s nose too narrow again. It’s always noticeable in close-ups of her face, and it’s always her nose. I’ll have to fix it later. I don’t have time now.

Like it agrees with me, my alarm clock goes off, and I jump. Even when I know it’s coming, even when I’m staring right at the thing. I shuffle back to the other side of the room to hit the button before it wakes up Church and Sully in the next room. Stupid middle schoolers get to sleep in an extra half hour, and they think they’re kings.

Mom already has two hard-boiled eggs and a glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice ready for me when I get downstairs. I don’t know when she hard-boiled those eggs. She certainly didn’t do it last night, and it’s the crack of dawn now. She sits at the island counter in her running outfit with her bouncy ponytail, reading some health article on her tablet. A few strands of hair are out of place, and water splashes in the shower down the hall. She and Dad are already back from their early morning run. Heinous.

Morning, hon! I know in some universe she must be speaking at normal volume, but it is not this universe. Made you breakfast. Are you feeling okay? You look a little gray.

I grunt. Morning is the devil’s time. And Mom has told me I look gray at least once a week for the past year. I drop onto the island stool in front of the eggs and juice and begin eating. Maybe I should try coffee. Coffee might help. Coffee might also send me into spiraling bouts of depression.

Under Mom’s elbow is today’s issue of the Westcliff Star. I pull it over and turn it around. The front-page headline reads REMINDERS PLACED AT WELLHOUSE TURN. Below that is a picture of the sharp turn in the road past Wellhouse Bridge where wreaths of flowers, ribbons, and toys decorate the ground. That’s local Indiana news for you: they have nothing, so they fill their pages with the reminder that Wellhouse Turn kills more people every year than great white sharks. Also local Indiana news: comparing a turn in the road to a shark.

I finish the first egg. Dad comes out of the back hall smelling like a pack of spearmint gum and wearing slightly different running gear than what he wears when he goes out with Mom, which means these are his work clothes for the day.

Morning, Eggs! He stops behind me, puts his hands on my shoulders, and leans down to kiss the top of my head. I grunt at the nickname and stuff egg in my mouth. Hard-boiled heaven. How’d you sleep?

I shrug. Is it too much to ask that no one speak to me in the morning? I have just enough energy in my mouth to eat delicious eggs; there’s none left to form words. Not to mention that in twenty minutes I have to get in my car to go to school for seven hours, where I’m sure plenty of talking will happen, whether I like it or not.

Mom distracts Dad with her health article, which is apparently about the benefits of cycling. I tune them out. Read about how the Westcliff High band bus driver fell asleep at the wheel and drove off Wellhouse Turn last summer on their way back from regionals. Chew. Before that it was a guy driving with his son in the winter. Drink juice. And before that, a woman taking her two kids to day care early in the morning. Chew more. A group of drunk teenagers. Finish off the egg. A lone girl who hit the wrong patch of black ice. Finish off the juice. They should put up a barrier to keep people from flying off the turn and down the hill to the river, but no. Without Wellhouse Turn, we have no news.

Don’t forget, your brothers have their first soccer game this afternoon, Mom says when I drop off my stool and take my plate and cup to the sink. They’re really excited, and we all have to be there to support them. Okay?

I hate it when she says Okay? like that. Like she expects me to get angry at her before the words are ever out of her mouth. Always prepared for a fight.

Yeah, I say. I can’t muster any more. I return upstairs to my room for my backpack, my sketchbook, and my shoes. I jump up and down a few times in an attempt to get more blood flowing to my brain. Eggs eaten. Energy up. Ready for battle.

I resist the urge to go back to my computer, open up the browser, and check the Monstrous Sea forums. I don’t read comments, and I don’t check the forums before I leave for school. That computer is my rabbit hole; the internet is my wonderland.

I am only allowed to fall into it when it doesn’t matter if I get lost.

Amity had two birth days. The first was the same as anyone’s, and she didn’t remember it. She didn’t spend much time dwelling on the fact that she didn’t remember it, because she had learned years ago that nothing good came of dwelling. The second birth—or the rebirth, depending on what mood she found herself in—she remembered with stunning clarity, and imagined she would for the rest of her life.

Her second birth was the day the Watcher took her as its host.

CHAPTER 2

Some people have called Monstrous Sea a phenomenon. Articles here and there. A few critics. The fans.

I can’t call it that, because I created it. It’s my story—it’s the one I care about more than anything else, and it’s one that a lot of other people happen to enjoy—but I can’t call it a phenomenon because that is pretentious, and narcissistic, and honestly it makes me queasy to think of it that way.

Is it strange to be nauseated by recognition?

Lots of things about Monstrous Sea nauseate me.

The story is at once very easy and very hard to explain. I’ve never tried to do it in person, but I imagine if I did, I would end up vomiting on someone’s shoes. Explaining something online is as simple as pasting a link and saying, Here, read this. They click. Read the intro page. If they like it, they keep reading. If not, oh well, at least I didn’t have to talk.

If I did have to explain the story without the very handy reference of the story itself, I imagine it would sound something like this:

On distant planet Orcus, a girl and boy fight on opposite sides of a long war between the natives and colonists from Earth. The girl and boy are hosts to parasitic energy creatures whose only weakness is each other. There’s lots of ocean, and there are monsters in that ocean. Stuff happens. Colors are pretty.

There’s a reason I’m an artist and not a writer.

I began posting Monstrous Sea online three years ago, but it blew up when the origin post appeared on the Masterminds site. People actually saw it. They started reading.

They cared.

That was the weirdest thing. People other than me cared about it. They cared about Amity and Damien and the fate of Orcus. They cared whether the species of sea monsters had names. They cared if I put the pages up on time, and how good they looked. They even cared about me, who I was, though they never got past my username. The fans didn’t, the trolls didn’t, the articles and critics didn’t. Maybe the creator’s anonymity made it more of a phenomenon. It certainly kept me from getting too nauseated to work. I get emails from agents and publishers about putting Monstrous Sea into print, but I delete them right away; traditional publishing is this huge, terrifying thing I have to fend off with a stick every once in a while so I don’t get overwhelmed by the thought of a corporate machine manhandling my baby.

I didn’t make Monstrous Sea to be a phenomenon—I made it because it was the story I wanted. I make it now because there’s something inside of me, crushed around my heart, that says I must do it. This is what I was put on Earth to create, for me and for my fans. This story. This is mine, and it is my duty to bring it into the world.

Does that make me sound pretentious?

I don’t care.

It’s the truth.

MONSTROUS SEA FORUMS

USER PROFILE

LadyConstellation **

Admin

AGE: oo

LOCATION: Nocturne Island

INTERESTS: Riding sea monsters, charting stars, exploring clockwork palaces.

Followers 2,340,228   |   Following 0   |   Posts 5,009

UPDATES

View earlier updates

Oct 14 2016

Don’t forget, new Monstrous Sea T-shirts are on sale this week! We’ve got Amity and Dallas, Damien and the dread crows, and plenty of sea monsters. Go check them out! monstroussea.com/store

Oct 15 2016

Wow, you really ate up those T-shirts. More on the way! (Plus, don’t forget the next compendium!)

Oct 17 2016

I think you guys are really going to like tonight’s pages.

. . .

Oct 18 2016

Hehehehehe told you you’d like them. >:D

Oct 19 2016

Yes, yes, I know, I’m evil.

Oct 19 2016

You liked the shirts so much, they’re going to be on sale this week too! Hot off the presses!

Oct 20 2016

Excited for Dog Days tonight! Hope to see everyone in the chatroom.

When asked what the rebirth had felt like, Amity could only respond with Painful. A creature of pure energy had crawled inside her and rearranged her very genetic structure. How else could it feel? But the people of Nocturne Island were persistent, and deeply spiritual, and the Watcher was one of their great guardians, so eventually she changed her answer to Enlightening.

CHAPTER 3

School feels more like a punishment than ever.

I just don’t care. I stand at my locker this fine October morning and stare down the hallway. A homecoming banner decorates the mouth of the hallway, reminding students to buy tickets for the football game this Friday night. Someone put that banner up there. God, someone made that banner. Someone painted it and everything. Students pass me wearing outfits for this particular day of homecoming spirit week, which happens to be hippie day. Lots of peace signs and tie-dye floating around. So much school spirit.

I barely finish my homework every night; how does anyone else have the willpower to care like this? The people having the most fun, dressed in the most ridiculous costumes, are seniors like me. How? Why? These are legitimate questions: I feel like someone told a joke and I missed the punchline, and now everyone’s laughing without me.

I stand by my locker in stretched-out jeans and a baggy sweatshirt, counting the minutes until I have to give up and go to homeroom. A group of boys wearing tie-dye headbands and rose-colored glasses crowd up to the locker beside mine; one of them throws it open so hard it smacks me between the shoulder blades. The boy who did it starts to apologize, then sees that it’s me and loses his voice to a badly concealed snort. I turn away and ignore them until they leave again, when one of the others pulls his hood up and acts like a cave creature, his back hunched and his hands held out in gnarled claws. The other boys laugh, as if they aren’t still within my sight. I yank my own hood down.

I don’t understand this place, but I only have to survive it for seven more months—seven months until graduation, until college. And college, as I have heard it from several respectable sources in the Monstrous Sea fandom, is so much better than high school it’s laughable.

I want to be there. I want to be in the place where high school is the joke, and I don’t have to be near people if I don’t want to, and nobody cares what I wear or look like or do.

When the boys disappear around the corner and all attention fades away from me, I turn back to my locker. Freshman year, I festooned it in graphics and fanmade art for Children of Hypnos, my favorite book series. A few early Monstrous Sea sketches hid in the corners, but that was before Monstrous Sea was even a thing. Now my locker is empty aside from my school stuff. I stuff my stats and history books in my backpack. Wedge my sketchbook under my arm. The backpack gets slung over my shoulders, and my dignity tucked safely away.

On to homeroom.

Eliza. I need to borrow you for a little while. Mrs. Grier has a bad habit of grabbing the first student who walks through her door when she needs something, and today I’m the unlucky plebe she gets her happy teacher hands on. She beams at me, looking the picture of joy in an unseasonal yellow sundress and earrings shaped like bananas.

I ease my arm out of her hand so it doesn’t seem like I don’t want her to touch me. I don’t mind Mrs. Grier. Most days I like her. I wish I had her for an actual class instead of just homeroom, because she doesn’t make me talk if I don’t want to, and she counts showing up to class as your entire participation grade.

We have a transfer student new to the school today, she says, smiling, and steps sideways. Behind her is a boy a little taller than me, football-player big, wearing jeans and a Westcliff High T-shirt. He hasn’t even been here a day, and he’s already got the school spirit. He scrubs a hand through his short dark hair and glances at me, expression blank, like he doesn’t quite see me there. My stomach turns. He is exactly the kind of person I try to avoid—I like being invisible, not having someone look at me like I should be.

This is Wallace, Mrs. Grier says. I thought you could give him a few tips about the school and help him with his schedule before we leave homeroom.

I shrug. I’m not going to say no to her. No usually makes more problems than it solves. Mrs. Grier smiles.

Great! Wallace, this is Eliza. You can go ahead and sit next to her.

Wallace follows me to my seat in the back of the room. He moves slow, sits slow, and looks around like he’s still asleep. He glances at me again, and when I don’t say anything, he pulls his phone out of his pocket and starts going through texts.

I didn’t want to say anything to him, anyway. The school isn’t that confusing—I’m sure he’s smart enough to figure it out on his own.

I curl up my legs in the desk chair, set my sketchbook against them so no one can see the inside, and begin work on the next Monstrous Sea page. I forget Wallace. I forget Mrs. Grier. I forget this whole school.

I’m gone.

I get through the day the way I always do: by disappearing so well the teachers never see me, and by resisting the temptation to check the Monstrous Sea forums on my phone. I’ve heard it’s much easier to get through school when you have friends to talk to, but all my friends are online. I used to have offline friends. Or at least I thought I did. Growing up, I had friends in school and in my neighborhood, but never good friends. Never friends who invited me to sleepovers or movies. I got invited to a couple of birthday parties, but sometimes I think that was because my mom badgered other moms. I was a weird kid then, and I’m weird now. Except now neither I nor any of my classmates is under the delusion that we have to interact with each other on a more than superficial basis.

Dad likes to say thinking I’m weird is normal. Well, Eggs, you’re just going to have to trust me when I say that’s a thing a lot of kids your age think. Maybe he’s right. All I know is, last year Casey Miller saw me walking behind her in the hallway and actually squealed in fear before she skipped away. She halfheartedly apologized a second later, of course, but it was a packed hallway during passing period—who gets scared by another student behind them? I know a week before that, I walked into gym late because of particularly nasty period cramps and scored my entire class ten minutes of stair laps that to this day have earned me the sort of looks that should be reserved for murderers. I know a few months before that, Manny Rodriguez invited some of his swimmer friends to cut me in the lunch line, only to have them refuse because they were afraid I’d call down a demon on them.

Is that the kind of person I seem like? A cultist? A religious fanatic? Am I so weird I should be the bad guy of the week on a prime-time television crime show?

My parents wonder why I don’t have more friends, and this is why: because I don’t want to be friends with these people. Even the nice ones think I’m weird; I can see it in their faces when they get paired with me for projects. I’m the person you pray the teacher doesn’t call for your group. Not because I’m a terrible student, or because I make you do all the work, but because I dress like a homeless person and I never talk. When I was really little, it was endearing. Now it’s strange.

I should have grown out of it.

I should want to be social.

I should desire friends I can see with my eyes and touch with my hands.

But I don’t want to be friends with people who have already decided I’m too weird to live. Maybe if they knew who I am and what I’ve made, maybe then they wouldn’t think I was so weird. Maybe then the weird would just be eccentric. But the only person I can be in this school is Eliza Mirk, and Eliza Mirk is barely a footnote in anyone’s life. Including mine.

By the seventh-period bell, I have a whole new page of Monstrous Sea ready for inking, but my mind is on the page at home I still have to finish. New pages go up on Friday nights, always, like TV shows or sporting events. My readers like consistency. I like giving it to them.

I toss the books I don’t need back

Reviews for Eliza and Her Monsters

[thewallflower-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Eliza lives with a sitcom family of annoying siblings and health-nut parents who just “don’t get it”. They don’t get computers, they don’t get the Internet. They think the way to live life is out of doors, socializing face to face. And that’s not the only place to find friends and success. Especially for severe introverts like Eliza.Eliza is just a high schooler who writes a webcomic. A damn successful one. From the sound of it, it’s on par with Penny Arcade and xkcd in terms of popularity, but more dramatic (and made in manga style with space-existential elements). But on the Internet, no one knows you’re a dog, and Eliza’s anonymity keeps her creative. Then she meets a new student, accidentally defending him against some bullies, and learns he’s the premiere fan fiction writer for her comic.This is a story about two people who find each other and bond through the thing they both like. It’s like a John Green/Rainbow Rowell hybrid, which is high praise. I loved it. This is a great cozy romance for people with social anxiety. They don’t follow predictable stereotypes. They make bad decisions, decisions that hurt people, not Hallmark-movie pulled punches. I heartily recommend reading it.

[bingereader87 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Loved this book so much. Not sure what else to say but that. If you haven't read it, you need to. Like now.

[mickyfine · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Eliza Mirk has one goal: get through her senior year of high school while remaining as invisible as possible. Ironic given that Eliza's online personality LadyConstellation is the creator of one of the most popular webcomics, Monstrous Sea, which has millions of readers and followers. When a new boy arrives at Eliza's school and he turns out to be a Monstrous Sea fan, Eliza's two worlds collide in ways that will shake up her whole life.An excellent YA novel exploring the ideas of creativity, anxiety, and the perils of internet fame. Eliza is a compelling character and while it's obvious throughout the novel that she has some serious issues to deal with, the novel isn't just an "issues" book. Instead there is interwoven into the narrative this fantastic fantasy world that Eliza has created with drawings and sneak peeks into the narrative of the fantasy world she's created. A lovely read that will definitely appeal to fans of Rainbow Rowell's [Fangirl] and John Green's [Turtles All the Way Down].

[vavaviolet · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I enjoyed reading this book. Eliza is a relatable character and one you would root for. The story gives us an interesting glimpse into anxiety, how it affects the person afflicted by it as well as the people around her. I like the inclusion of drawings and dialogue from Eliza's popular webcomic, it's like reading a story within a story. I felt Eliza was too hard on her parents and wish she would open up more, I'm glad she did so towards the end. If you like webcomics, fanfics and fandoms, you'll like Eliza and her Monsters.

[jugglingpaynes · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Eliza and her Monsters tells of the double life of Eliza Mirk, a teenager who is anxiety-ridden and friendless except online. As Lady Constellation, she posts a popular webcomic, Monstrous Sea, and her work has millions of fans around the world. It's fame that she has always carefully hidden from everyone, including her parents--they don't understand her obsession with her art and her online life. She's always done well separating the two until she meets Wallace, who happens to write the most popular online fanfiction of her work.I don't usually give a full five stars, but this book spoke to me, had me wrecked, and then lifted me. Thank you, Francesca Zappia, for writing this story. I rarely manage to finish a book in three days, but this one grabbed hold and insisted I couldn't put it down. It does a good job of explaining the effects of anxiety disorder. I wish I had had a book like this when I was a teenager.

[edgoldberg · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Eliza keeps a low profile at high school. Never overly popular, she has more friends online than in person. She's also the creator of the popular Monstrous Sea online comic. Her parents think drawing comics and posting them is just a hobby but Eliza has made a lot of money from it and her viewers number over a million. Up until Wallace turned up in one of her classes, she never talked to anyone in person about Monstrous Sea. She monitors forums and has two friends online who are an integral part of her Monstrous Sea life. But Wallace is different. Despite their growing relationship, Eliza still wants to keep her Monstrous Sea identity anonymous, even from Wallace...which may pose a problem as their relationship grow.Eliza and her Monsters is a fun book. There is some, but not a lot, of the comic in the book, so if you're not a comic book reader or aren't a fan of fanfiction, then it won't be an issue. Eliza and her Monsters is more a young adult romance but not a sappy romance...well maybe until the end anyway. It's not like Sarah Dessen or Morgan Matson. It's its own unique brand.Eliza and her Monsters is a fun read. Enjoy.

[lycomayflower · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

High school senior Eliza has been publishing an incredibly popular webcomic for years--anonymously. Only a handful of people know the identity behind the person known as LadyConstellation, and Eliza likes it that way. She keeps to herself in school and spends most of her life online, where she has not only tons of fans but a few genuine close friends. Then one days she meets Wallace, a new kid at school who is demonstrably into her webcomic, but who doesn't know that she created it. A lovely, page-turnery exploration of teenagerness, first love, fandom, creativity, family, and mental health ensues. I tore through this and loved every second of it. It's up there with [Fangirl] among fandom-adjacent YA for me. Recc'd if this is your bag.

[pocketsable · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is the first book I really debated between a Three Star and a Four Star rating. There are parts I really appreciated and then there are parts that made me question if I had accidentally picked up another book. Don't get me wrong, I read this book all in one day. I enjoyed it. But I felt like the book didn't know where it wanted to go by the end and in turn, made the ending feel very confused.There was a lot I enjoyed, including the characters in the first half of the book (or more specifically the main characters). I absolutely love the use of Online Personas being the ones with the more explosive personalities while the real life versions were quiet and reserved. I related to Eliza for the most part. That being a quiet loner who actually has a large online following and who wishes for her online self to be disconnected from her real life self. I liked Wallace and his relationship with Eliza (again, in the first half of the book). I really enjoyed the pages that were just online chat conversations between Eliza and her friends. And I absolutely loved the Monstrous Sea artwork, comics and Wallace's novelization of it sprinkled within. I wish there was more Monstrous Sea artwork and story within the book.That being said, there were a lot of issues. First of all, the book takes a while to actually get going. The character just meanders around for a few chapters, going to school, talking about the webcomic, talking about her family, etc. It's not presented in a fun or interesting way but rather in an odd internal monologue exposition dump. We dont really get to learn anything until Wallace actually starts to interact with Eliza.Second, We are introduced to her webcomic but we never really get a sense of the actual 'fandom' because she never interacts with her fans except when talking about things not related to her webcomic. Which I thought was rather odd. What creator doesn't interact with their fans a little, even if just in secret? So, when it's revealed at the end that even people close to her were huge fans, it's a bit confusing. The book portrays the webcomic as the new Star Wars, where everyone and their mom seems to have read it. Yet, no one really talks about it until the 'big reveal' at the end and by that time, the character is so disinterested, it's hard to get a grasp of the actual size or impact of the fandom.Third, the big reveal and the rest of the book that comes after it is my biggest problem with the book. Where do I begin with this. Well, let's just say that everyone instantly swaps to a different personality. Wallace suddenly becomes a selfish, pushy jerk who suddenly doesn't care about his girlfriend. Eliza suddenly becomes extremely rude to all her fans and then extremely mentally unstable to the point where she almost commits suicide. And I can't help but feel like the writer didn't really know how to write someone who has just fallen into a severe depression, so she tried to explain it in the actions of the story rather than in the mind of the character as events happen but no real character insight is given other than sterotypical "They dont need me anymore" dialogue which makes absolutely no sense when the main character has spent most of the book not caring about her family. The brothers, who up to this point have had no personality outside of being annoying brothers, suddenly pull a Deus ex Machina with the parents to get them to "understand". And it all comes to this rather bland ending where nothing is really solved with the exception of the end to the webcomic and her online persona now having a real life face to it.I appreciated this was the first book that really put online friends on the same level as real life friends. I appreciated that it did something unique by adding in the comic on top of just talking about it. And I really appreciated showing anxiety as something that happens to people, not as some great flaw in someone's personality that you need to beat down. However, the confused ending and the lack of character growth after the second half really left me kind of disappointed. I would maybe give it a read if it sounds interesting to you but I wouldn't exactly recommend it as the next big read.

[olegalca · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

If you liked Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell, I'm fairly sure you will like this book.

[kristymk18-1 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Loved loved loved. The author depicts social anxiety so well and I loved the glances we get at Eliza's comic series.

[Lois Ifekwe · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

this boo is soo good! i usually don’t like high school stories but i LOVE how this book handled the characters struggles with anxiety. super relatable, like EVERY thing feels like real life conversations that happen, not forced or flat or one dimensional!! great read would totally recommend!!!!

[tuusannuuska-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I'm not usually a huge fan of YA, but I really enjoyed this one. This spoke to my fandom loving side, as well as the anxious wreck that burrows under my skin.

[Alma Lanjouw · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

It is nice tot read about introvert people. I am 50+ years old and I loved reading this fantastic novel.

[vokram-944968 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Title: Eliza and Her Monsters

Author: Francesca Zappia

Publication Date: May 2017

Genre: YA Contemporary

Score: 4/5

Eliza and Her Monsters is a story about a high school student who creates a very popular webcomic. She meets a new student in her senior year who is a fan, the first fan she’s met in real life, and they become involved. She suffers from crippling anxiety. This theme of mental illness is explored throughout the entire story.

I have a couple of problems with elements in this novel. One is that, in this day of Google, how could her parents not know how popular her webcomic is? Especially as they want to be as involved in her life, couldn’t they take a minute and plug the URL of her creation into a web browser? Failing that, Google much? Plus, with regard to her anxiety, and although it came together better in the end, there were a couple of times I found it unbelievable and it broke my suspension of disbelief. This is a small spoiler, but her consideration of suicide was believable and sort of not believable too. It could have been done a bit differently to more accurately represent suicidal feelings. Though, I am glad to see real representation of suicidal feelings in a book.

There was a lot to like in Eliza and Her Monsters. I’m glad to have read it. It is a very easy read. Recommended.

[zayd lokhandwala · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

OMG. This book is everything it needs to be and more- so much more. The author gets art and the internet and it doesn't seem like she's talking down to you. It has wonderful themes, wonderful dialogue and the webcomic Monstrous Sea is so realistically realized- it feels tangible.Its so easy to slip into Eliza's POV. You feel her emotions, her flaws, her love everything and it is amazing

[actually ridiculous · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I loved this book - I read it in one sitting. I’ve never read something like this before - and I’d totally read it again immediately.

[Cordelia Farmer · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This is the first book to make me cry in a long time . Its brilliant and loves you with a feeling that's not quite good or bad.

[Rose · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Oh my God. Oh. My. God. This could just be the effect of having just finished this book, but I ADORE it.
The main character is beautiful. Everything about her is beautiful. Even at the end, when she had an anxiety problem and had generally reached far below rock bottom, I loved her. Hardly ever did her actions feel wrong or frustrating or out of character. She did some things wrong, and some things right, but I felt as if she was a real girl.
Her relationship with Wallace was also quite nice. Not too much. Just fitting considering they're a bunch of high schoolers. Tons of books I've read say that they're about teens and then (when it comes to relationships at least) they make them act as if they're mentally toddlers and physically 30. It's frustrating and unneccesary. This book is quite refreshing.
The side characters were well constructed. Eliza's family felt like humans too, and I think what the author did with Church and Sully was the best and most unexpected character change I've ever read. I was in tears when they confronted their parents because it was what I had been waiting for for so long. Davy is the epitome of the perfect dog. Enough said there. Eliza's online friends talked and acted like people I've met actually talk and act. Especially em and max.
Lastly, I love the fictional world created within this fictional world. I know now that the children of hypnos is a real novella thingy that the author has actually written, but the sea of monsters sounds AMAZING. Like, as I read about it, I kept getting the urge to go to the website and read this bomb ass sounding comic. Or even wallaces transcript.
Tl dr: an accurate representation of being a teenager today (takes one to know one) with amazing characters. Would recommend if you're looking for a sensible teen relationship and cool world building.

[Yu Barom · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This book is just right for teenagers, y'all SHOULD read this book

[ray_-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This book had all elements I like put together beautifully to create a piece of art.

I have to say, when my friend told me (more like ordered me xD) to read this book and told me it had a combination of all things I love, I was a bit sceptical, I feared that I would get disappointed.

But gladly, I wasn't.

This book combined fandom life, art, comic books, writing, fanfiction, fanart and mental illness so well I'm so happy I read it.

I loved how each element in the book was covered enough throughout the book and I didn't feel like any of them was left out.

I loved Eliza and Wallace and related to both of them on so many ways, and I loved how realistic they were in their problems and the way they delt with them.

Francesca Zappia really did well in this one, I would definitely pick up more books by her in the future.

[authorjanebnight · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Synopsis: Eliza is the creator of a webcomic that has gained a large following. She mostly keeps this fact hidden, especially when she meets a boy named Wallace who is a fan of he comic. Unfortunately, such secrets don't' bode well for a budding relationship. Rating:4/5This book really resonated with me, as a creator, and there were many things I liked about it. I think the portrayal of Eliza coincided with my experience as an author. Her art and her life are mixed and there is not much separation between the two which is hard on any creator but especially a teen. After Eliza is outted and no longer able to hide behind a pen name it makes it difficult for her to create art because of fear of criticism. I could deeply relate to that. I also adored Wallace as a character. Him and Eliza are a great match and both were endearing partly because of their lack of social astuteness.This book is much more cutesy (relationship wise) than angsty which is a nice change as it is YA. I tend to find many YA books involving relationships to be full of unnecessary angst. There is angst in the book but not because of Eliza and Wallace's budding romance. I also really liked Eliza's family. Especially her brothers. Her relationships with them were complicated as is typical for sibling relationships. Eliza's relationship with her parents really resonated with me. Eliza's parents don't get it but they are supportive as they are able to be. In this book Eliza is 18 though I felt like she read a little younger. Probably closer to 15. I also appreciated the anxiety representation in this book and thought it was well done. I struggle with anxiety and so could relate to Eliza when she struggled. While I liked many things about this book there were a few things that didn't work for me. We are shown quite a bit of Eliza's comic and honestly I didn't find it interesting. I wanted to be invested in the comic but didn't end up thinking it was interesting. I also felt that Eliza's level of fame was probably overdone in the story. Most teens who make a web comic aren't going to have the amount of fans she did. Sooooooo many people from her school are fans but they don't know she is the creator. I felt like this level of fame, while cool for the story, might not have been very realistic.Also, there is one scene where Eliza is dealing with the aftermath of the reveal that I thought portrayed some unhealthy ideas though there is also a scene later where those ideas are challenged. Still, I thought the scenes impact when it was unhealthy was stronger than the passing comment about it being an unhealthy view later.My last issue with the book was just with the marketing. I thought the synopsis revealed too much. Eliza doesn't have her identity revealed until late in the story and I would have preferred not knowing that was coming. Overall I do recommend this book especially to content creators. It was a fun and enjoyable read.

[Ivy Ceniza · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This is freaking insane. The roller coaster ride of emotions. It started so cute and fluffy, all those pure romantic scenes between Eliza and Wallace and then it become so heavy, so hurtful and so sad. This is amazing. I love it so much

[Mukvipa S. · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

this is super super cute, the romance was really adorable. note passing, chat message, it's all I want.

Francesca's written was so good, I thought these people are real.
I feel connected to them, specifically Eliza. my heart ache for what she been through and I cried like a baby.

[simplykelina · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This was so hyped when it came out. I tried picking it up once and only got a few chapters in and put it down. It was not from me not enjoying it, but just was never in the mood for it. I was so excited when this came out on audiobook. I knew I needed to give it another try.I know everyone loved this, but I was still not expecting to love this as much as I did. It has a little bit of everything within the story. The characters bring love, friendship, heartbreak, and learning lessons. It deals with anxiety and suicide. I found myself smiling and tearing up all within in a few chapters.I was not expecting this to tackle so many intense topics. Every time I heard someone talk about this I heard about how cute of a story it was. Yes, it is a very cute story but had so much more going on for both Eliza and Wallace. My heart was breaking when you hear about Wallace and his family. Eliza is also dealing with anxiety and the pressures of making others happy, that she is struggling with how to make herself happy. Overall, I really enjoyed this and highly recommend it. The audiobook was great, but you will not be able to see the comics that are in the published story. It did not take anything away for my love for this though. I still recommend the audiobook.

[Courtney · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

It was just what I needed at this time. It brought inspiration in what I would like to do next.

[Laura M · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

Couldn't finish. I liked it at first, but the girl's reactions and thoughts toward her family really ground my gears. So much entitlement. I found it too disgusting to continue reading. Oh, no, my family wants us all to be a family for real! Oh, no, what a tragedy! And you would think that after she learns about another character having been adopted, her attitude would change. No, it just became worse. A disappointment.

[thelibraryladies · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Kate: My high school years were during the time before social media really became a huge thing. My parents had Internet, but it was a dial up connection that we could only use if we weren’t expecting or planning to make any pertinent phone calls. And honestly, I’m so relieved that the Internet wasn’t the big social zone that it is now, for regular people as well as celebrities. I think that teenage Kate would have both loved living a lot of her life online, but I also think that it would have been isolating in its own way (and given that I was bullied a fair amount, it probably would have opened up a huge target on my back from my peers). And that is where “Eliza and Her Monsters” comes in. As a teenager who suffered from social anxiety and depression, I saw a bit of me in Eliza, our main character who has found the online world to be more comforting than the real world. And as someone who has written some fanfiction in her life (and was a vaguely well known author in a niche fandom at one point, though I’m not telling which), the ups and downs of online artistry also spoke to me. But the core of Eliza herself, and how she interacted with those around her, didn’t do as much for me as one might think that it would.But I want to start with what I liked here. I thought that Eliza’s social anxieties were pretty spot on in terms of characterization. Without really outwardly saying that she was suffering from it, you get a slow and well painted picture of what Eliza’s insecurities are like, how they hinder her, and how she tries to cope with them. It was refreshing to see this character portrayed in a realistic and honest way, and that while it was understandable that she would act in various ways, she wasn’t totally let off the hook when she was being a jerk to those around her. I also really liked that this book brings up the philosophical question of ‘what do artists owe their fans?’. Sure, this is something that has been going on for a long time, but with the advent of social media, now fans can not only interact with each other, but they now have the opportunity to address and interact with their favorite creators in a more direct way. And while this is great in lots of ways, in other ways, sometimes lines are crossed and fan entitlement gets a bit out of hand. From the “Song of Ice and Fire” fandom to the “Harry Potter” fandom to the wonderful world of comics across the board, sometimes healthy and relevant critiques of topics turn into “YOU OWE US THIS.” This book allows us to see that from the creator’s POV through Eliza and one of her favorite authors, and it’s a great way to raise these questions and get the reader to think about them.But there were other things about this book that frustrated me. Mainly, I didn’t really care for Eliza, as relatable and realistic as she was. I think that seeing it from the perspective of an adult who had to tramp through that swamp of teen angst and came out on the other side, a lot of me was saying “goddammit, suck it up.” Teen Kate would have TOTALLY loved Eliza though, and given that this is, ultimately, written with teens in mind, I think that she probably works well. I also was a bit frustrated with her relationship with Wallace, if only because I felt like there were some things that she did that were SO manipulative and she never really was taken to task for it. I didn’t really like what it said about acceptable things in teen relationships.Overall, I liked how “Eliza and Her Monsters” approached fandom, artistry, and teenage mental illness. I wish that I had liked the protagonist more, but hey, you can’t have everything.Serena: As Kate has lain out so nicely, my evaluation of the strengths and weaknesses of this book is pretty similar. I don’t have the personal experience of existing as a creator on an online platform, but I follow various fandoms online fairly avidly and have witnessed first hand the strength in community that these groups can bring, as well as the viscous cycle of entitlement and possession that can also be on display at times. In these ways, I think this book is very much speaking to an ongoing struggle in today’s teens’ lives that I, like Kate, never had to deal with.Like Kate, I was never part of the popular crowd in highschool. I wasn’t the most bullied either, and instead existed somewhere in the probably lucky “no one cares” zone of being unnoticed. I also had no other “version” of life or a representation of my life that I had to maintain, like today’s teens who must carefully navigate and manage not only their day-to-day activities, but also the version of themselves that exists online. Eliza, uncomfortable and shy in real life, has found a niche for herself online. But no social sphere comes without its own strings.I very much enjoyed the exploration of creativity on an online platform. Eliza is both safely at a distance from those who interact with her online (one of the appeals of her online persona), but is also exposed and at the mercy of those same fans. No longer do fans need to write a letter and mail it in to an author who may or may not even look at their fan mail. Creators online are exposed across so many formats to the visceral reactions of the same fans whose admiration and appreciation they are hoping to garner. I think one of the best representations of the push/pull relationship of this kind is Bo Burnham’s raw, and almost tragic, song “Can’t Handle This.”But, in general, I read books for the characters, so as much as I loved the themes that were tackled in this story, I had a similar hang up with Eliza as Kate did. I think Kate hit it on the nose when she mentioned the fact that she and I are reading this having come out on the other side of that hellish tunnel called “highschool.” Many years (yikes!) distanced from these same struggles, they begin to lose their edge. This is good, but it also presents a reality check when reading books like these. I don’t want to dismiss these problems as “just highschool stuff, get ready for REAL life, kids!” But…I’m still a 30 something woman reading this and that’s what I felt. So with that perspective, maybe there’s nothing wrong with this character for highschoolers themselves, and it’s probably touching on many relatable challenges. But there are many YA stories out there that present the challenges of their young protagonists in ways that are more approachable and sympathetic to their adult readers as well than this one did, which is a legitimate mark against it.

[emeliz21 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

"There's a small monster in my brain that controls my doubt."


If I could give this book 1000000 stars, I would. This is my favorite story that I have read in I don't know how long – I am not exaggerating when I say that I devoured it in one sitting with tears streaming down my face.

I myself suffer from anxiety, depression, agoraphobia, etc, and I have never related to a character more than I do Eliza. I feel so emotionally tied to this book that even though I read it in July, I'm still dazed from it.

If you love stories, fan art, fanfiction, comics: if you prefer a fictional world to the real one, READ THIS BOOK! You won't regret it #therearemonstersinthesea #youfoundmeinaconstellation

[amabilialifestyle · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

The only reason I’m giving this a 3-star rating is because there are as many cons as there are pros.First thing you should know is… I was hyped coming into this book.Like, full blown HYPED.I mean c’mon. A massive online presence, fandoms webcomics and fanfiction, AND anxiety/depression finally being portrayed in a sort-of-true way (at least closer than how many other books get it)?!? All in one book?!?No.I mean yes, they were all in here and were a major part of the storyline and main character, but no as in I did not agree with HOW they were implemented into the book and… most else.For starters, the family dynamic was completely wrecked. See now, this book follows Eliza Mirk as she navigates her supposed “horrible” reality while juggling online life as the creator of the world-famous webcomic ‘Monstrous Sea’. Throughout the book I found myself getting FURIOUS (and I admit, a little uncomfortable) each time Eliza pushed her family away.I get it, okay? You want to be happy and left alone to live life on your terms but wowowow do you HAVE to be so rude to your parents and brothers?? Her parents were seriously just trying to have a good relationship with their hard-to-reach teenage daughter!! Who spends more time on her phone and computer than with her own family!! Her brothers clearly just wanted to connect and help their sister!! Instead of being seen as annoying, uncaring little kids!! I couldn’t help thinking that the author wanted to get some pent-up feelings of her own out and decided to throw it in a YA, for good measure.I understand how a lot of families are really this way. Parents disagreeing with the amount of time their children spend on electronic devices/internet and the children (most times) getting mad over said parents not being able to understand how they just connect better with people who get it and like the same things they like on the internet. It’s a real situation and it gets out of hand. Just don’t end the book with the characters staying this way if you want good feedback from readers. ** SPOILER **At least Eliza found help, sorted out her anxiety issue a bit, and TRIED to connect better at the end but she still saw her parents as the bad guys when they really weren’t. The one pushing away and causing problems was herself.** END OF SPOILER **Back to Eliza’s parents though…They would have understood why ‘Monstrous Sea’ meant so much to her if they’d asked before buuuuut Eliza could have also stepped up and said something – anything – instead of sulking and hating them more. It’s difficult to overcome but we need a character who looks difficult in the eyes and conquers his/her fears.Gosh I really didn’t like Eliza for this.She was selfish in a way anxiety and depression makes you selfish (and that’s okay for the beginning of a book as long as she eventually gets help and learns to deal better, right? Which does happen, by the way so that’s good) yet her bitterness added unnecessary fuel to the flame.Another thing, the characters were astronomically boring. I especially disliked how her younger brothers – Church and Sully – were portrayed. The author tried to add dimension to their traits by including what makes them unique (like being good at singing and math, for example) but it only added to the list of what they enjoy, not who they are as people. Singing and math don’t shape you as a person!!And don’t even get me started on Wallace. Number one fanfiction writer of her comic, this meaty football-playing looking guy who can’t talk in public - and resembles a puppy when he’s alone - so he resorts to writing out notes to Eliza at school. He becomes a totally selfish boyfriend (real traits!!) at the end of the book. When we first meet him he is seen as a mute fanboy, then turns into a relatable writer with a confusing past, then somebody I just wouldn’t get along with, ever. Not to mention the fact that she sometimes uses him as a crutch and he suspects during the end (when he gets mad, I got mad but then I agreed because I would probably be mad as well) but does nothing else about it. All problems in this book are blamed on Eliza’s so-called Monsters. That’s not true though, the real problem is Eliza.Honestly I disliked Eliza more and more as each chapter went on. I know it makes me sound shallow and an unemotional person but at this point, I’m not even ashamed to admit it. ** SPOILER **I sympathized with her struggle to stay hidden and her love for her creation but I did not sympathize after her parents (unknowingly and out of pure love for their daughter, though yes, they should have asked first) gave out her secret and she spiraled down into this abyss where she suddenly contemplates driving off the same cliff Wallace’s father died from.** END OF SPOILER **Nearly every single person (clearly not counting Wallace ‘cause he was too busy being angry) she encountered in real life that was a fan of LadyConstellation and ‘Monstrous Sea’ would either allow her space or compliment her comic. There is nothing (!!!) wrong with people telling you they liked something you created. In fact, try saying thank you for a change. If it wasn’t for them she wouldn’t have enough money to pay herself through college in the first place. Now enough of whatever I just ranted on… This book was relatable in ways many other books are not.Eliza’s therapy scenes were amazing. Her therapist gave great advice and never looked down on her client (something that doesn’t occur most of the time in real life) while allowing her to look at life in another angle. I liked this, I really did. It made sense while her comments and help allowed Eliza to process something new and finally change for the better. These parts got me emotional and earned a FULL STAR.The dynamic of the book and the drawings of the comic placed here and there was absolutely GENIUS. So yes, another FULL STAR. Half of the last star was because I understood how she felt most of the time (besides the family dynamic I just ranted on a full novel – basically – about). Eliza was at ease with herself the most when she didn’t have to think of herself physically and she was just LadyConstellation, full-blown creator and artist. She did what she loved and people loved it in return. What a better way to live, huh? Her depression was written spot-on. Everything from the sudden outbursts to the loneliness. If only she realized the world around her was not the one to blame. She was. I don’t think she ever realized this though.The other half of the last star was only ‘cause I thought it was really cool of the author to include the fact that Eliza is a fangirl herself (SO COOL HOW THIS BOOK/COMIC SHE IS OBSESSED WITH ACTUALLY EXISTS – aka the author posts chapters on Wattpad) of the famous ‘Children of Hypnos’ series. Very emotional, very realistically portrayed.What a lovely way to end a book.

[rivkat_2 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Eliza has severe social anxiety (though nobody ever says this outright) and drifts through school; her parents berate her ineffectually and periodically make her abandon the computer/phone/drawing pad she’s buried in. Online, though, Eliza is the creator of a highly popular webcomic, which she’s even monetized for college money, and she has two close friends who help her maintain this as a secret identity. Then a new kid comes to school and it turns out he’s a BNF in her fandom. They grow closer, but Eliza isn’t just the fellow fan he thinks, creating the conflicts you’d expect. Love doesn’t magically heal either Eliza’s anxiety or her love interest’s own problems, which include selective mutism. Teen romance isn’t really my genre, but this did fine despite being really more plausible as a f/f story.