River's Remorse (Sanctuary Series Book 2)

By Charlotte Abel

River's Recruit, Book 1 of The Sanctuary Series: Free
River's Remorse, Book 2 of The Sanctuary Series
River's Revenge, Book 3 of The Sanctuary Series

River wakes up to the terrible realization that Jonathan is gone. She can't shift and has no will to live. It isn't until a shocking truth is revealed that she is able to consider life without him.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Charlotte Abel
• Release date: Nov 5, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310136504

Charlotte Abel

Charlotte Abel is a full time writer that lives near Boulder, Colorado with her husband Pete. When she's not reading or writing, she enjoys hiking, bicycling, archery and dog sitting. Previous careers include: dance instructor, jewelry designer and glass artist. "Enchantment," a paranormal coming of age romance, is her debut novel. She plans to publish "Shattered," a romantic thriller set in the remote Sawatch Mountain wilderness of Colorado, in the early spring of 2012.

Book preview

RIVER'S REMORSE

Book Two of The Sanctuary Series

Charlotte Abel

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite online book retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

By Charlotte Abel

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2014

I have nothing left to live for, except my family and my people. —River

I was on pins and needles throughout this whole book. I felt like someone was holding my heart in a vice.—Christina Harris

Charlotte Abel's books always pack an emotional punch; there are quite a few laugh out loud moments, a few shed a tear moments, and plenty of gasp out loud moments.—Megan Barton

Chapter One

DESPAIR

River

River woke up in Gabriel’s bed with his body spooned around hers, his arm draped over her waist. It took a moment for her to remember, but when she did, it stole her breath. Jonathan’s dead.

Her eyes burned. Her heart ached. She wanted to cry, but her eyes remained dry. She wanted to scream, but her voice remained silent. She wanted to rip Shula’s heart out with her bare hands. That, she could do.

River tried to slip out of bed without waking Gabriel.

He tightened his grip.

Stay. There was more than a hint of alpha in his voice. Enough that his single word command froze every muscle in her body.

I need to get up.

Not yet. Gabriel’s voice cracked. The alpha tone disappeared, replaced by the grief-stricken voice of a boy that’d lost his best friend. He buried his face against the back of River’s neck. Please.

River slid her hand over Gabriel’s and entwined their fingers.

Vengeance could wait.

River let Gabriel hold her until the sun peeked over the windowsill. Gabriel?

Hmm?

I need to see Jonathan. She took a shuddering breath. Before they cremate him.

Gabriel sat up and pulled River into his lap. He pressed her head against his chest, just like Jonathan would have done.

Do you know where they’re keeping him?

Eli took his body through the tunnels and left it near the entrance of the McKnight mine, where his family could find it.

River had no idea that the weight of her grief could get any heavier. But it did. She couldn’t even say good bye. Why?

Pa said that Aunt Shula didn’t want Jonathan’s family to wonder what had happened to him. She said it wasn’t fair.

How dare she speak of what’s fair. Is it fair that Jonathan’s dead? Is it fair that Shula’s potion killed him? Is it fair that she’s still breathing? River stood up and fisted her hands, digging her nails into her palms. I can’t un-poison Jonathan or bring him back to life, but I can set one thing to rights. I can see to it that Shula stops breathing.

River… Gabriel wrapped his fingers around River’s wrists and tugged her closer as he stood up. He tipped his chin down and gazed into her eyes. Shula lost favor when she joined us on the surface, but if you kill her, the council will execute you.

I don’t care.

I do. Gabriel’s voice cracked again. Please. I can’t lose you, too.

I’m sorry, but I can’t let her get away with murdering Jonathan.

You have no proof.

River jerked out of Gabriel’s embrace when she heard Reuben’s voice.

He was leaning against the doorframe, arms folded across his massive chest. If you want to bring charges against Shula, that’s your right, but without proof, she won’t even stand trial.

I don’t intend for her to.

Are you willing to sacrifice my life in order to satisfy your need for vengeance?

Reuben…

His eyes flashed with amber light. If you kill Zebulon’s daughter, how far do you think the council will go to apply the law of extended accountability? Are you willing to endanger Gabriel…or Paul?

What do you want me to do?

I want you to focus on living your life one day at a time.

I can’t.

Then do it hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second if that’s what it takes.

Without Jonathan, I have no life.

I know it feels that way right now but—

You have no idea what I’m feeling. River didn’t mean to yell at Reuben. She softened her voice. Hannah left. She didn’t die.

She might as well have.

Hearing Reuben admit that Hannah was dead to him added even more weight to River’s burden of grief. You still have Gabriel and Paul.

So do you. And I’m asking you, for their sake, to let it go.

I can’t. I’ll never forgive her.

I’m not asking you to forgive her. All I’m asking is that you not kill her.

Then keep her away from me.

ELI

Eli pulled his hunting knife from its sheath and pressed the tip between his ribs, angling it towards his heart. How long would it take to die? What if he missed? He wanted to escape the unrelenting pain, not inflict more. The surest, quickest way would be to draw the blade across his throat, but the idea of drowning in his own blood did not appeal to him.

He’d been dragging his broken body through Reuben’s mine for two days, maybe three. The darkness, so thick he tasted it with every labored breath, made the passage of time impossible to measure. How long would Mother wait before sending a search party? He’d love to see her face when he failed to emerge from the mine at the appointed hour to declare to the gathered masses that he was the long awaited son of Ephraim. Mother had been planning this particular event since Eli’s conception.

An inappropriate burst of laughter shot a bolt of pain through his shattered femur. He screamed then panted until the white-hot burn settled into an excruciating throb echoing every beat of his heart.

He pressed the blade of the knife against his throat, just under his jaw, avoiding the thin braid of Aspen’s hair he wore around his neck. Even in death, he’d protect that precious talisman.

He pressed a little harder. The superficial cut stung, but the pain was nothing compared to the agony of his broken leg. He lowered the knife. Ending his own misery would increase Aspen’s.

Reuben hadn’t been able to rescue her from the whorehouse before they closed Sanctuary, but he had purchased an exclusive contract. No one but Eli could touch Aspen for the next year. Her life was better, but she was still a prisoner. If Eli died, Reuben would have no reason to renew her contract. She’d spend the rest of her life as a whore.

He had to convince everyone that he was the son of Ephraim so he could secure her freedom. The words of the forbidden lullaby drifted through Eli’s mind. Heavy of heart and body broken. He carries his grief in a crystal token…

If it wouldn’t hurt so damn much, he’d laugh at the irony of how Mother’s plan to manipulate the prophecy resulted in fulfilling more of it. Contemplating suicide was about as heavy of heart as a man could get. And his body was most definitely broken. He didn’t carry his grief in a crystal token, but he wore Aspen’s braid around his neck. It gave him a small measure of comfort, but it also served as a constant reminder of how he’d failed her.

He couldn’t prove that he was a descendent of Ephraim’s line, but no one could prove that he wasn’t. He fit the prophecy as much as Jonathan did. River was the deciding factor. If Eli could convince her to be his alpha mate, even a doubter such as himself would have a hard time denying that he was the promised son of Ephraim.

Guilt pricked Eli’s conscience. He should have told Reuben that Mother had poisoned Jonathan. Reuben would have forced her to administer the correct antidote but he also would have punished her.

Eli couldn’t bear the thought of a whip slicing through Mother’s back so he risked Jonathan’s life to protect hers.

The generic potion Eli forced down Jonathan’s throat wasn’t as effective as a poison-specific antidote would have been. He risked his own life to take Jonathan to the hospital in Leadville. But that didn’t atone for his, or his mother’s, sins.

If he’d confessed everything to Reuben, Jonathan and River would still be together. Jonathan would be heralded as the son of Ephraim. He would free all the servants and whores, including Aspen. And Eli would not be trapped, suffering agonizing pain from a compound fracture.

But there was nothing he could do about it now. Remorse served no purpose. He clenched his jaw, slid the foot of his good leg into position, shifted his weight from his hips to his hands and pushed off. He collapsed eighteen inches closer to the entrance of the mine.

Pain, and the sound of someone calling his name, yanked Eli out of the respite of unconsciousness.

Get that lamp out of his face.

Jesse? Eli pried his eyes open and tried to sit up.

Don’t move. Jesse pressed his hands against Eli’s shoulders, pinning him to the ground.

I think I broke my leg.

I think you’re right. Noah, a novice enforcer, moved the hurricane lamp over Eli’s leg. The bone’s sticking out at least three inches.

Noah. Jesse’s voice carried the weight of an Alpha’s rebuke.

Noah, Micah and Luke ducked their heads. Eli felt the urge to submit, but managed to resist. The son of Ephraim would never bow to anyone.

Jesse propped Eli’s head and shoulders up then pressed the mouth of a goat skin flask to his lips. Drink a little wine. It’ll help with the pain.

Eli took a sip then turned his head. I need something stronger.

Sorry. None of the heirs of Sanctuary are within a day’s ride.

Eli nodded. Jesse, Micah and Noah were surface dwellers. If they were caught with outsider medicine, they’d be executed. The only people that had pain killers were the handful of Sanctuary enforcers serving their required topside duty. Eli was entitled to medication, but since he lived with Mother, it wasn’t worth the risk. She’d given up her rights as an heir of Sanctuary when she joined the surface dwellers to help Reuben’s mate with a difficult birth.

Jesse jerked his chin at Micah. Go get Shula. Tell her what happened.

Micah cocked his head to the side. What exactly did happen?

Jesse could spot a lie almost as easily as Reuben. Eli needed to be careful. He sucked in a deep breath then spoke between grunts and gasps of pain. A couple summers ago…I had a mission…McKnight mine.

You were ordered to detonate a blast under Turquoise Lake and flood the mine.

Eli ground his teeth. I failed.

I remember that too.

The blast opened a passage. Eli paused to stifle a groan. Reuben found it. I fixed it.

From the looks of things, Jesse nodded at Eli’s leg, it didn’t go exactly as planned.

The charge detonated early. A support beam grazed my leg.

You’re lucky to be alive.

Eli grimaced. Doesn’t feel like it.

Jesse handed Eli the flask of wine. Drink as much as you can stomach. We still have to carry you out of here, get you down the mountain and haul you to Reuben’s house.

Take me to Shula’s cabin. It was further, but as much as Eli dreaded the trip in a wagon over rough ground, the thought of spending any amount of time in the same house as River tied his gut in knots. She believed Jonathan was dead. He couldn’t tell her the truth. Her grief would be unbearable. Especially since he played such a big part in causing it.

~***~

It took Jesse, Noah and Luke several hours to carry Eli out of the mine. Mother, Micah and Reuben were halfway up the mountain by the time they reached the entrance.

Stay where you are and start a fire. Mother’s voice echoed off the mountainside. I want to set his leg before you bring him down.

Eli’s stomach twisted at the thought of Mother setting his leg without sedatives. The infirmary inside Sanctuary Mountain was primitive compared to the hospital where Eli left Jonathan, but even that was better than the field operation he would have to endure.

Give me the flask. He wasn’t nearly drunk enough.

When Mother reached Eli, she grabbed the empty flask out of his hands and shook it at the group of enforcers. Which one of you idiots gave him alcohol? I have a sleeping potion a dozen times more effective than an entire flask of wine, but I can’t give it to him now. She glared at Jesse. I hold you personally responsible for the torture he’s going to endure.

Woman. Jesse conveyed more with that single word than Mother’s entire rant. That’s enough.

Mother held her ground for a full minute before submitting. Eli breathed a sigh of relief when she ducked her chin. But Mother was right about the torture. Nothing he’d ever experienced could have prepared him for such agony. Not when Jonathan knocked him out with a rock. Not when he’d shot him in the ass with an arrow. Not even when the beam snapped his femur.

Eli passed out again, but he didn’t stay out long enough. Even in his drunken, semiconscious state, he still heard the snap of bone against bone. He still felt the agony of torn, cramping muscles. Agony that increased with each passing hour as the alcohol left his system. When Mother finally deemed it safe to administer her sleeping potion, Eli experienced his first moment of true relief.

Eli, wake up.

Mother?

We need to talk.

I need to sleep.

After Jonathan died, Reuben put me under house arrest. I wasn’t able to get anyone into position to witness your emergence from the mine.

So no one saw me fulfill that part of the prophecy?

Reuben, Jesse, Noah, Luke, Micah and I witnessed it.

Eli snorted. That’s hardly enough to start a revolution.

The sworn testimony of one enforcer is worth more than a dozen shepherds, farmers and ranchers. Mother brushed a lock of hair off his brow. But it’s still not enough. You have to convince River to become your alpha mate. The sooner the better.

A flash of anger heated Eli’s face. His eyes burned. Give her a little time to mourn Jonathan’s death.

We don’t have the luxury of time.

You don’t know River the way I do. If you push her, she’ll just dig her heels in deeper. Let me handle it. In fact, you need to stay as far away from River as possible. She’s going to suspect the truth.

She’s already vowed to kill me.

Then why are you still here? Eli closed his eyes and groaned. Please tell me Reuben didn’t put you under house arrest in this house.

House arrest, in my case, just means I can’t go anywhere without a guard. Jesse’s new recruits are taking turns. Thankfully, they’re incompetent. Mother handed Eli a glass of water and a large white pill. Take this.

Are you insane? Eli lowered his voice to a whisper. Where did you get that?

No one knows I have it.

You didn’t answer my question.

The sooner you swallow that, the less chance I have of getting caught.

Eli swallowed the pill. Is it a pain reliever?

Antibiotic. And this… She poured a spoonful of liquid out of a dark blue bottle. Will help you sleep.

I was asleep. You woke me up.

Do you want this or not?

Eli nodded and opened his mouth. His entire face puckered when the bitter potion hit his tongue. If you refuse to leave, at least promise me you’ll be careful. River is unpredictable during the best of times. If she’s already sworn vengeance on you, you need to watch your back.

She has no proof I’m responsible for Jonathan’s death.

Whether or not she believes you actually murdered Jonathan, she believes he’s dead because of something you gave him.

Don’t worry about me. I can take care of myself. Mother patted Eli’s cheek, as if he were a child.

He grabbed her wrist. I’m serious.

So am I. Mother smiled, kissed his brow, then turned and ducked out of the room.

Eli frowned as he realized whose room he was recuperating in. He’d been too distracted by the constant pain to pay attention to such trivial matters, but he was in River’s room, lying on her bed with his foot propped up on her pillows. Where the hell was River sleeping?

Jonathan

Jonathan hated hospitals. Everything about them…the bright lights, the humming and beeping equipment, the antiseptic smells, all of it…reminded him of Landstuhl. And learning that Franklin was dead.

His head pounded. His stomach felt like it was trying to claw its way out of his body via his throat.

The doctor frowned at Jonathan. I’d like to keep you for a few more days, just as a precaution.

I want out of here.

I can’t release you in good conscience.

You can’t hold me here against my will either.

The doctor sighed. You young soldiers think you’re invincible.

Really? Jonathan lifted his stump and glared at the doctor. My brother died in Afghanistan.

So did my son. The doctor stood up. The wheeled stool he’d been sitting on banged into