Evening Star

By Floriminda Edar Reid

At night we sleep and dream. Some dreams we remember, and some we forget. Yet, all that we see or have seen is but a dream within a dream.
Christian and Alana left the Kings Aqua Isle to travel over the seas indefinitely, away from the current catastrophe that has seemed to take over Alana’s life. What happiness they have is cut short by another unfavourable surprise. The couple are oblivious to the fact that this trip is one that they will never forget, because there is more adversity along the way that only the gods can help.
Once again, Alana is tested, and this time she is to travel completely alone. Her task is to solve the mystery of her recurring dream where her life is in danger and no one can come to aid her.
As if Alana’s life is not already cursed by Katyana, Marcel Deciro sent another dangerous assassin to cease Christian’s immortality once and for all. Christian’s body is drifting away before Alana’s eyes. How is Alana to survive without Christian?
Without love, is without life. This incontestable story of eternal love for immortals, for Alana, Christian and Adrian, will restore its promises; heal the angers, heartaches and hates, to those who carry pain in their soul.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Floriminda Edar Reid
• Release date: Feb 12, 2016
• ISBN: 9781311431066

Book preview

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Prologue

It was past midnight, moonless and starless. The sky was covered with thick dark clouds. The southerly wind howled like a wounded animal, sometimes it wailed like an infant, and the next moment it moaned carelessly like caressing the branches and leaves in every trees, plants and shrubberies. The roads and streets were deserted. No strayed dogs and cats about, not even a possum was awake. The humans were fast asleep, oblivious to the dark smoke that crawled above their houses. The occupants inside their dwellings fell deeper into slumber. Like a serpent with many tentacles, the dark smoke continued to travel looking for a particular house on the island.

Suddenly, a jagged bright lightning that came from nowhere blasted the house and shattered the glass windows and doors. Curtains blazed into fire, igniting the walls, ceilings, furniture, floor, and throughout the entire house. None of the occupants in the house had seen it coming; the danger and the enemy. The man leapt up to his feet after a second of being disorientated from the blast and shock that shook his senses. His clothing was ripped, barely covering his body. There were cuts to his face and arms. He didn’t have a chance to look at his surroundings, as the ceiling was about to collapse upon him. He moved quickly and instantly appeared in the upstairs bedroom, looking for his family. He shouted their names, but no one replied. The fire was like a demon in a dream, frantically hissing, licking and igniting everything in the house. Someone grabbed the man from behind and yelled. They’re not here! Come on; let’s get out of here, before the entire place collapses! The man had no choice but to get away from the blaze before it consumed him. His heart was pounding hard, and there were tears in his eyes with fears for his family.

There was one more place he must check and he prayed that all his family were there and safe.

The basement door was already open. The tiny door that led to the underground pathway out to the back of the house was also opened. The bed where his wife was resting was empty. Fear assaulted the man’s senses, blocking his mind to concentrate. Over here, hurry! a voice said. He followed the voice and reached the clearing to watch the house blazing like inferno of ravening hell.

Light of the Evening Star

I lived and died many times before

Like the day and night come back many moons

Like flowers so sweet, bright and cheerful but withered soon after all.

The day I came and brought you the sun, to warm you anyhow

At twilight I waited for the evening star

Alas! You were here before my time.

From dusk to dawn I quivered

When a thick and white cloud above falls on winter time

Tiny flowers welcoming the frost

Who am I to whine?

I live and die only this time

While the sun, the stars and the moon guides you to be mine.

(Floriminda Edar Reid 2010)

Chapter 1

Aboard the Eternal Boat

Alana stood against the rail of the Eternal boat. Her back was straight and rigid. As the boat glided slowly away from the island of Kings Aqua Isle, the sun was shining but the breeze was cooler. How different the shape of the island was from where she mutely stood. The way it curved like a frown. How many times had she been in the boat or plane and had the opportunity to observe the shape of a crescent white beach? Why is it that she had just noticed it now? From this angle, the crescent white beach was one to admire.

But for Alana’s eyes, the white crescent beach was frowning at her, as if unhappy of her departure. Alana could not remember if she had appreciated the island when she and her mother had returned from Australia to live. If they had not returned to the island, would her mother still be alive today? Yes, probably. No, she didn’t know that. Alana swallowed the lump in her throat. She touched her lips, and knew she was frowning at the island, too.

She let her eyes wander over the patches of the soft cotton white clouds, moving over to the forest and to the mountain. Angrily, she diverted her eyes from the sight of the forest. Behind the clouds was the glorious blue sky, although the absence of the seagulls or from such alike, the sky unselfishly gave its brightness as if to say to Alana, life was for living and she was alive. She must put an end to her anger and grief. She must move on and let her happy memories of her mother, help ease the pain where the hole in her heart was still raw. She must look at the bright side of life with Christian.

Alana recalled her memory of her wedding day as she twisted round and round the golden band on her finger. The ring was not hers really, it was Lucinda’s and Christian was wearing Alex’s. Alana breathed in and exhaled slowly as she thought of her clothes on her wedding day. She was wearing pink sweat pants and a green jacket. She remembered she was holding a bouquet of flowers, but could not recall what kind of flowers they were. There was only Christian’s family, the doctor, the nurse and the dying Elizabeth during the ceremony. It was an unexpected wedding, as unexpected as Elizabeth’s passing.

Alana searched her mind would she have liked to wear a white gown and had her own wedding ring from Christian if the circumstances were different? Would Christian have married her if Elizabeth hadn’t made a wish before she died?

Alana was not sure.

What now then, must she do? They had not yet consummated their wedding vows. The heat in her heart was still there, waiting to be ignited, to become a fire. But Alana was reluctant to make the first move for fear that Christian would reject her approach. That would be the last thing Alana wanted from him. Although they had been sleeping together for a while now ever since her mum was still alive, they have not made love. Christian would always stop her, before it got too far.

Yet she loved him and would wait till he was ready. Alana licked her lips that had dried from the ocean breeze and tasted the salt. She leaned half of her body forward against the rail, as she watched as the blue water produced white bubbles, trailed along and under the boat. She waited expectantly to see if any fish would come into sight. The mist of the salty water dampened her skin, yet she continued to stare at the white foam below. Nothing came into view but the white bubbles. After a few minutes, her eyes started to sting from the salty mist. She looked up ahead to the disappearing crescent white beach in the distance, and felt no regret for leaving it behind.

The summer wind whipped her loosely plaited hair as she stepped away from the rail and walked towards Christian, steering the boat.

How are you going? You okay? Christian reached out his right arm to Alana’s waist. His smile was gentle. His eyes were full of promises to make this trip a turning point for both of their lives. He could see the sadness in her eyes, although she smiled back at him.

I am fine, she replied softly. She leaned her head on his side, staring absentmindedly ahead. No thoughts come to her mind. Half a dozen sailboats were a few metres ahead of them; it was a perfect day for sailing. After a while, she said. I’ll just go down and get my book, okay?

She had her book inside her backpack. Lachlan and Christian were loading their luggage and she had seen Christian carry her backpack on board.

I’ll get it for you. Christian offered.

No, I’ll get it. It’s good for me to be doing something.

Okay, he kissed the top of her head. Your backpack is on the couch.

Thanks. I’ll be right back, she paused for a second and glanced up at the satellite dish that was sticking out on the pole. She squinted her eyes from the glare of it. She frowned trying to remember what she was supposed to do.

Alana held onto the smooth wooden railing as she descended on the spiral staircase. She had never been on the lower deck before. Every time she came on board, she stayed on the top deck and didn’t bother to tour around at this floating sanctuary as Christian called it. Alana stopped on the last step, and let her eyes roam, admiring the interior of the vessel as it unfolded before her.

The Eternal was luxurious, yet not superficial, it was homely, and yet elegant in its own way. Alana smiled wanly and shook her head. She could not believe she didn’t see all of this before. Was her mind so fully focused on her desire for Christian to kiss and change her to his kind, that she was not interested to take a look around his sanctuary?

It seemed like yesterday — their first kiss.

Alana walked in slowly on the thick, white soft carpeted floor, inhaling the subtle scent of the roses on the counter. There were two cabins, one on the side of the boat. A very large open living lounge, with an L-shape leather couch, a kitchen area, complete with gadgets a chef would have loved.

There was a small bar on the corner, with bottles of spring water, fruit juice and soft drinks. She took one bottle of iced tea, opened the white fridge of the same height as her, and found wrap up sandwiches inside. She took one sandwich. Each side of the boat had a large size tinted glass window where you could gaze at the blue ocean and the sky. The interior paint was pastel lime, while the colour of the furniture was a light coral orange. A vase of fresh yellow Roses was placed on top of the bar counter, and another tall vase with 3 stalks of Birds-of-paradise was placed on the side of the square dining table. There was a flat forty inch TV opposite the bar, while two large pot plants of living silver ferns were put each side of the entrance to the modern kitchen.

Alana’s eyes caught the built in bookshelves. She ran her hands along the shiny smooth surface. There were fiction and non-fiction books, a couple of them she had already read, as she had a copy at home. She opened the chilled bottle of mango iced tea and took a sip. The cold liquid refreshed her throat. Amazed at how thirsty she was, she drank the iced tea almost in one gulp. She ate her sandwich slowly, while she continued on her tour.

The cabin on the left looked exactly the same as the other. Each had a double size bed, a bathroom, a side table with a lamp shade attached to the wall, and a wardrobe. What were these cabins for? Vampires didn’t need them. Could it be a kind of decoy in case a coastguard or some authorities would like to come on board for inspections? Alana wondered if she had to sleep in one of these cabins, and Christian would have the other one. She was not looking forward to the idea of sleeping on her own. They would have to squeeze in one cabin.

She spotted her backpack on the couch, as well as her jersey. She grabbed her light blue woollen jersey, her book and left the lower deck.

I started to think that you had fallen asleep down there, said Christian teasingly, as he turned to see Alana putting on her jersey. She placed the book on the table and settled herself on the soft padded love seat, a few paces behind Christian.

Hardly, she replied. I took a tour, it’s lovely down there. I like the feel of it. It’s kind of homely.

Did you see everything?

I think so, she flipped the pages of her book on her lap.

Christian smiled secretly. There was one thing that Alana had missed. He would have the pleasure to show her later, once they were out of the New Zealand waters.

Let me know when you want your dinner. I can get you a fresh fish and grill it for you.

Are you kidding? I thought you …

You thought me, what? his toned was teasing. Alana was sure that Christian’s tiny dimple deepened.

I thought that you are against people taking small fish. Oh, never mind me Christian, I am still not thinking straight.

That’s okay, I understand, he answered over his shoulders. I will get a decent size that is enough for you. What kind of fish do you have in mind? Would you like a tuna, salmon or cod? And if you do not wish to have fish for dinner, I can grill a chicken for you. Claudia has supplied us some frozen chicken fillets. So, would you like chicken or fish?

A grilled fish will do, thank you.

Done.

The Eternal had speed up by this time on the vastness calm Pacific Ocean. The sky above the horizon was like the twin of the blue water. It was a beautiful sight, as the silver vessel drifted through. The sun was still smiling, the wind was mildly cool. There were no more birds flying in the sky at this distance from the land. As far as the eyes could see, the entire surroundings were blue.

Christian glanced over his shoulders for the second time and found Alana curled up on the seat, and had fallen sleep. Her chest rose up and down in slow motion. The book she was reading rested on her stomach. Christian quickly took the grey blanket from under the opposite seat and spread it over Alana. He stood there for a few seconds watching her peaceful face, before he went back to man the boat.

There were things that Christian needed to tell Alana. He must be very careful that Alana would understand everything he would say and that she would not think that he was only making more alibis, so that she would not persevere to become one of his kind. Christian was not sure if he could do what Alana wished. He had not done it himself in the past. He had never turned a mortal into a vampire. Every mortal he had bitten had died; his venom was potent on the human flesh. He didn’t want to experiment this on her and take the risk. But Christian had a plan B, and he hoped that this would work on Alana. It was important that she would understand so that she would agree to his plan. Christian was perfectly happy being married to Alana, even though their marriage was still yet to be consummated, but at least he knew that Alana was his and would always be safe.

Christian’s face was woeful. He tried to balance between the possibility of making Alana happy to grant her wishes and keeping her safe. He knew he could do both, but there was a high price to pay. This trip that he suggested would allow him and Alana to weigh things together; after all they were now married. And married couples should discuss things together regardless of what circumstances arise. Christian understood why his family were concerned for Alana. His family offered some assistance in case things would not go as planned. Only Claudia was the least concerned. She had prepared some extra supplies for Alana and Christian. Christian was adamant that whatever first aid his sister prepared for them was unnecessary. Nevertheless, Claudia reasoned with her big brother, that to have extra preparations where a human is concerned was the best policy. Christian rolled his eyes heavenward and gave up. He told his family that he had planned and was prepared for anything. He would do what was needed to be done. He didn’t take his wife for a trip to harm or butcher her. The thoughts were not even there in his mind.

He continued to steer the boat with pain in his emerald eyes, not knowing how the future would unfold before him and his young bride. They were already out in the New Zealand waters when Christian decided to stop the engine and let the gentle waves rock the vessel’s sides.

Alana woke up. She had probably slept for two hours or so. She had dreams but could not remember any of them. She stretched her body and legs, her arms over her head. Her nap refreshed her. Christian came to her side, lifted her legs and sat down. He placed Alana’s legs on his lap.

How was your catnap? he asked while massaging her feet.

Pretty good, thank you. I think I slept quite long, she seemed to feel guilty for resting too long.

Well, that’s the beauty of being in the open sea; the breeze is refreshing and relaxing. We will stay here overnight and tomorrow we’ll go to the nearest island and walk around. Would you like to do that?

Sure. You are my captain, she smiled at him. I’ll go wherever you take me.

Christian brought her hand to his lips. He would tell Alana about the things he was concerned about after she had her dinner. He leaned forward and kissed her lips lightly and stood up.

Where are you going? She searched his face which was looking ahead.

I am going fishing, he looked down at her face, grinning.

Oh. Are you going for a swim to get the fish?

Yes, but I could use a fishing rod if you want. Would you rather me do that, than leave you here for a minute?

Alana sat up. She looked around at the blue horizon. They were in the middle of the ocean and surely she would be fine while Christian would go fishing for a minute. It would probably be quicker for him to dive and get the right size fish for her dinner than using a fishing rod. The memory of her last fishing trip with her friends had put Alana off eating fish for a long time now. She wasn’t fond of torturing the sea creatures, especially with the hook.

I don’t like seeing the fish wriggling on the hook, she confided. Not quite sure now she could say it without sounding hypocritical and judgemental to the people who enjoyed fishing for sport and for relaxation, not to mention a meal. She too enjoyed fish for a meal. It had been a while now since she had eaten one. And Christian’s way of charging his battery was to have some fish. Fish was one source of nourishment, not just for Christian, his family and a few of his friends, but more so for humankind. Either she accepted that, or she didn’t have to have fish for dinner.

In that case I’ll dive. I will be right back before you miss me. His smiled seemed flirtatious. Without hesitation, he took off his white long sleeve shirt that tightly hugged his firm if not solid body.

Alana’s eyes widened. Well, it did. She was unable to nudge from her seat. She had not seen Christian’s naked body before. She had imagined him many times without clothes, and now here he was, half naked before her eyes. It took her breath away.

She stared at his smooth chest and then down to his navel.

Speechless.

She raised her eyes up and down slowly at the unpretentious contour of his paled stomach and chest. He acquired six packs from the hard labour of being a slave before he was transformed into a Dhampir. There was a birth mark just under his right ribs. It was round, the colour was kidney-red, and still distinctly visible despite his over one hundred and ninety years of age. Alana lifted her eyes to his face.

He is perfect and beautiful, she thought.

Christian met the eyes of his young wife, as if he was concerned at her scrutiny of his body. He tried to read the expression of her face. Perhaps it was a mistake to strip in front of his young bride. The corners of his mouth lifted up. He could see the heat from Alana’s eyes.

Alana did not reach out to touch him, her face seemed in awe. She, of course had felt her face tingled with warm.

He put his shirt on the table and then planted a kiss on her head.

I’ll be back soon, Christian jumped expertly into the water with his jeans on, leaving Alana on the boat, dumbfounded.

Alana shook her head and blinked. She was unprepared to see him strip. Christian was always modest showing his body. On many occasions, he had to stop Alana from unbuttoning his shirt and seemed afraid to get naked in front of her. Christian was not only deliciously attractive but appealingly fit, even if she took the vampire out of the equation. She could not believe how taut his belly was. Alana felt something stir below her stomach.

She was not ignorant about men without clothes. She had seen many of them at the beach, swimming pool and worst from the movies she watched. Although she had not touched the skin of a naked man, she knew that touching the man you loved felt beautiful.

Christian leaped up easily back on the boat. Not only did he have a piece of cod but he also had a crayfish on his right hand and half a dozen of oysters in the other hand. Alana hadn’t had the opportunity to compose herself from her thoughts. She looked at Christian; his wet body glistened from the rays of the sun. Rivulets of water dripped like threads of pearls from his ebony hair to his face, down to his hips. His wet pants hugged seductively, like a second skin. This man in front of her was her husband, for goodness sake. She should not hesitate to touch him, yet she felt nervous, shy and unsure if she had to.

As Christian could not read Alana’s thoughts, he inclined his head as if to question, if there was something that she felt distress about.

Is this big enough? He sounded proud of what he got.

Alana understood what Christian meant. She eyed the piece of blue cod in his hand, so fresh that it was still conscious. The fish wiggled, it distracted Alana from her undisciplined thoughts.

Yes, it’s perfect. That should be enough for my dinner, she swallowed hard, but remained rooted on the seat where she was earlier, before he jumped onto the water.

Are you sure? I can get you one more of this, he put the quivering cod into the white square bucket next to the outdoor barbecue grill. He placed the crayfish and the oysters inside the cooler.

I am sure, she got up and finally went closer to her husband. You might catch a cold, she said. It was stupid thing to say, but it was good enough for her nerves. She placed her palms on his chest.

Vampires don’t catch colds, sweetheart. But we feel the inner cold as well as we feel the warm from humans, his eyes sparkled warmly at her.

You are so beautiful, Christian, she lifted her eyes to his. Christian held her hands together and brought them to his lips.

Thank you. You too, sweetheart, he grinned. He needed to control himself. He could not take Alana at this moment just yet. She must know the truth and the consequences. He let go of her hands unwillingly, and said gently. Now, let me get your dinner ready, okay?

Christian decided to cook a traditional way without using his ever-so-quick-movements. It was always fun to cook at the timely manner.

Alana offered to help. I can make the salad.

‘If you want," he was glad to see her slowly coming out from her cocoon of grief.

While Christian was grilling the cod, he also cooked the crayfish with the sea water to maintain its flavour. He threw some parsley and bay leaves into the pot. Alana took her time in the kitchen. There was lettuce, baby spinach, cucumber, spring onions and some fresh herbs. The rations they had in the kitchen were Lucinda and Claudia’s idea. The fresh vegetables would only last for two to three days, and by the time they run out of it, they be would be disembarking on some island.

Alana mixed the fresh green into the salad bowl, garnished them with red grapes, cooked corns and sliced tomato. She dressed the salad with the homemade French dressing that Lucinda made. She carried the bowl, a bottle of spring water and sweet white wine to the upper deck where Christian had placed the succulent charred grilled cod, crayfish and the oysters, on the table.

She ate her dinner slowly, savouring its tastes and juices, and drank her sweet wine, while Christian talked about the activities they could do while in the boat and what other activities they could do when they disembark on the island they would came across. Christian offered to teach Alana to swim and snorkel with him. After half an hour or so, they both watched the sunset from the distance, mesmerized as it sunk slowly under the horizon.

Alana could not avoid of thinking of Adrian. It had been over two weeks since Adrian had tried to impose his past life on Alana. Even if Adrian was right that the little girl was Alana in the past life, it was now irrelevant. There was nothing that Alana felt-any déjà vu towards Adrian, except that they were able to communicate with each other through their minds. Why was it that these last few months she could hear the thoughts of some immortals? Why was it that she could not use her physic ability to other humans? And why was that no matter how she convinced herself that she had nothing to do with Adrian, deep down in her subconscious mind, Adrian did mean a lot to her?

Christian made up his mind to tell Alana about the danger that was playing hide and seek with him that day while Alana was in the Other Forest, and while he was feeding in the ocean. Christian sighed inwardly. If only life was less complicated as the sun went down to rest, things would have been better, and death could have been predicted or avoided for a time being. Nonetheless, Christian must take the consequences of Alana’s reaction afterwards.

Alana, there are things that I want to tell you about or rather I want you to know about, he waited till she drank her mineral water from the bottle.

She nodded. Okay, I am listening.

The day that I dropped you off in the Other Forest, and I was on my way to the ocean, I felt some danger that was playing hide and seek with me all day. Even after I picked you up from the forest, it was there and it only disappeared when we got closer to your house. It has never occurred to me that the danger was not meant for you. I know you hear me a thousand times, how sorry I am for Elizabeth and for your loss, but I wish I had known that the danger I felt at the time was meant for Elizabeth.

Alana was tongue tied. She was about to take another gulp of water. She put the bottle gently on the table. She could not believe that Christian hadn’t told her this before. He knew that there was some danger lurking about, yet he kept this feeling to himself, and he did not mention it with her? But if Christian did say something about the danger, Alana would have pushed them aside and would tell Christian that he worried too much. Besides, Christian’s senses could not reach that far where Elizabeth was. It would not be fair to blame Christian either way.

Christian, I don’t blame you for my mum’s death, nor I blame the truck driver who died of heart attack that caused the accident. I am aware that accidents happen anytime, anywhere, and sometimes without warning. It picked anyone or anybody who would be involved.

Alana had realised then, that perhaps since the accident, Christian felt responsible for Elizabeth’s death, as if he failed to kept his promises.

I just wish I had known, I could have prevented it or at least had given Elizabeth a warning.

It doesn’t matter now Christian, my mum is gone.

Alana felt her throat tighten. She too had wished that Christian’s sense of danger was not limited in distance. But his powers were not too attuned to others but mostly for her.

Are there other things that you want to tell me about?

Yes, Christian grasped Alana’s hands with his. He felt concern now that his earlier well practiced speech had disappeared. He wondered what better ways there were to tell Alana. He cleared his throat and effortlessly began his statements. This trip is part of our honeymoon, and the other part is for you to have a break from what happened, even before the accident. There were so many things that happened in the last two weeks and it affected your health. Getting away from home for a while will not only help regain your health but it will keep us closer than ever before. We have been married for almost two weeks now and I don’t know yet how I could fulfil my duty as your husband, without telling you first the possibility of what will happen after we consume our marriage vows.

Alana frowned. She hadn’t forgotten what she wanted from Christian. Would this be happening soon?

Tell me Christian, what possibly can happen to us.

It is more of what will happen to you, Alana.

Then tell me, please, she said bravely.

Very well, he took a deep breath at first. The day that I left you to confront the Deciro family, I made a promise to myself that upon my return from France, I will never leave you again, and that I want to be with you forever. I made up my mind from that time on, to ask you, to marry me.

Having heard this, Alana was surprised that Christian had indeed intended to marry her. He went on. But every time I look at you, feel your heart beats, I feel I inflicted death upon you. I am always worried and thinking of the worst possible thing that could happen. Many times I asked myself, how could I continually live through eternity knowing you died in my arms? There were stories I heard in the past, that a mortal’s eyes are ten times sensitive to the light of the sun for a very long time, once the transformation to become a vampire had kicked in, considering of course if the human would survive. The sensitiveness of the light will depend on the mortal’s immune system. Having said all of these, I still crave secretly to make you one of us. So, I mentally prepared for this time to come. I can assure you Alana, I will be very careful not to hurt you.

I know that you will not hurt me, Christian.

"But, I cannot foresee what exactly will happen to you Alana, afterwards. I personally believe that no mortal can survive after a vampire has taken her or him to bed. A vampire making love to a mortal — is like a slow death." Christian took her right hand and pressed them onto his cheek. He leaned his face on her hand.

He continued. "However, there is apparently a tiny chance that a mortal could or may survive. How? I do not know this, until Alex told me. This actually all depends on how their body, mind and soul will unite into one. This was proven before Alex’s time but he only heard about it being mentioned during his time with the ancients, four centuries ago. I will not bore you with all the details about it now. Anyway, the mortal had survived, but with it, came a high price to pay."

What was the price? Was it the sensitivity to the sunlight? Alana asked, almost a whisper.

Nothing was free. Nothing was easy as life was not meant to be a straight line. There were many jagged paths, as many as the constellation of stars in heaven. There was always a bargain, and a risk to take.

Christian moved Alana’s hair out of her face, as the gentle wind blew at them. No. It was not only the sun, but worse. Everyone has different reactions after being given a drug, per se. Your body may or may not react from the drug right after having them, but you don’t know that, until after you take the risk. Based on Alex’s story, the mortal had survived, but her mind apparently didn’t. In the end she was worse than the undead and her coven decided to burn her, to end her misery.

Alana shivered.

Christian went on, …but I would rather take the chances, and face the unknown, than not knowing. As the saying goes: Ti’s better to loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

Alana remembered Loren once said; what was the point of loving a man, if you can’t be with him? But what was the point of living, if one could not take the risk for love?

Would you take the risk with me Alana? asked Christian soon after.

When she did not respond, Christian said. "If you don’t survive the process, I will cease my immortality. I already found a way."

Alana met Christian’s eyes with hers. It sounded that he proposed to her for their death, if ever she would not survive the process. But Alana didn’t want to die with the guilt that Christian would cease his immortality because of her. She wanted Christian to live, to continue his immortality, to remember her throughout his immortal world.

But Christian’s immortality was worse than a death penalty without Alana. Seeing her face everywhere, hearing her voice in his heart, and not touching her. It was like torturing the very core of his soul. If he ceased his immortality, at least his soul would find peace. And if his soul should be given another chance to enter into another body of a mortal, Christian would find salvation to redo his past lifetime of being a vampire.

She remembered him telling her in the early months of their relationship, that he said, he could not die. So it was only a joke then, but she had believed him deep down in her heart.

You cannot cease your immortality Christian. You cannot die, you told me once. She thrust her chin out.

Yes, I can, this time.

How will you do that? She lifted her teary eyes up to him.

Do not concern yourself. It is my choice. He said softly, wiping her tears with his thumbs.

It is my damn business to know! Alana snapped at him. She pushed his hands away from her face. I do not want you to die. Alana cried. Tell me right now, what is this other way that you said you found? She sniffed and blew her nose with the serviettes that were on her empty plate.

Christian was never good in delivering this type of conversation to Alana, without her getting upset. He wished now he did not mention to her what he could do, if she should not survive.

Anyway, he could not take back what he stated, so he gently said. Should you not survive, I will go back to the White Mountain where the witch would gladly have her revenge upon me.

No, no. Christian, please don’t do this.

"It is the only way, Alana, that my soul will find peace, if you should die. Who