The Pillow Fight Professional

By Angela Ruth Strong

He’s got a pillow. And he knows how to use it!

I, Joey Michaels, am The Pillow Fight Professional!

Basically this means I'm training a bunch of my sister's friends to hold their own against older siblings. Unfortunately, when the girls win a pillow fight at an overnighter, those older siblings aren't very happy with me. I'm forced to plan a pillow fight to end all pillow fights. Me and the girls against a bunch of bigger boys.

Winning the pillow fight would be a lot easier without the following three problems:
1) Brock, the bully, who has never lost a pillow fight—or any fight for that matter
2) Isabelle, my partner, who may quit if she figures out that I'm using a bunch of girls to fight my battle for me
3) My team of little girls, who want to wear footie pajamas as our uniform
If we win, I'll get to keep the new bike I worked so hard for. If we lose, well ... I won't let us lose. I can do this all on my own if I have to. Because I got da moves.

The Pillow Fight Professional is the side-splitting fourth book in the Fun4Hire series. If your kids like The Kid Who Ran for President and the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, they’ll love the Fun4Hire series. They’ll laugh and cheer as Joey pillow fights his way to the best prize ever.

Start the laughs today and buy The Pillow Fight Professional now.

And don’t forget to download your FREE copy of Book One, The Water Fight Professional. Then keep going with The Snowball Fight Professional (Book Two), and The Food Fight Professional (Book Three).

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ashberry Lane Publishing
• Release date: Aug 1, 2015
• ISBN: 9781941720189

Angela Ruth Strong

Angela Ruth Strong is an expert on Write that Book, blogs on Inspyromance.com and How to Write a Novel, and is the founder of IDAhope Writers. She is the author of the Resort to Love series and the CafFUNated mysteries. Angela lives in Meridian, Idaho, and can be found online at angelaruthstrong.com.

Book preview

"Angela Ruth Strong has done it again! The Pillow Fight Professional had my entire family laughing. My daughter read ahead because she couldn’t put it down. Besides the practical bonus of learning the art of pillow fighting, it’s a satisfying yet stand-alone conclusion to the Fun4Hire Series."

~HEATHER WOODHAVEN,

Novelist and Mom

A fun romp through childhood.

~BILL MYERS,

Creator of McGee and Me, Best-Selling Author, Award-Winning Filmmaker

"I love it. My kids think The Water Fight Professional should be made into a movie!"

~JILL WILLIAMSON,

Award-Winning Children’s Author

"Reading The Water Fight Professional is more fun than licking a slug."

~JUDY COX,

Children’s Author

"The Snowball Fight Professional is a hilarious action adventure that will have you hunting for your snow gear. The perfect winter read!"

~HEATHER WOODHAVEN,

Novelist and Mom

Other Titles in the Fun4Hire Series

________________________________________

The Water Fight Professional, Book 1

The Snowball Fight Professional, Book 2

The Food Fight Professional, Book 3

Written by

Angela Ruth Strong

Illustrated by

Jim Strong

Ashberry Lane

© 2015 Angela Ruth Strong

Ashberry Lane Publishing

P.O. Box 665, Gaston, OR 97119

www.ashberrylane.com

Available in print at most retailers.

Smashwords Edition

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Published in association with the literary agency of Wordserve Literary Group, www.wordserveliterary.com

ISBN 978-1-941720-18-9

Cover design by Miller Media Solutions

Illustrations by Jim Strong

Title font by Kimberly Geswein

Scriptures taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

FICTION / Middle Grade / Humor

To Jim Strong—

My teammate

And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

I John 3:16b

I, Joey Michaels, am the Pillow Fight Professional.

Basically this means I’m training a bunch of my sister’s friends to hold their own against older siblings. Unfortunately, when the girls win a pillow fight at an overnighter, those older siblings aren’t very happy with me. I’m forced to plan a pillow fight to end all pillow fights. Me and the girls against a bunch of bigger boys.

Winning the pillow fight would be a lot easier without the following three problems:

1) Brock, the bully, who has never lost a pillow fight—or any fight for that matter

2) Isabelle, my partner, who may quit if she figures out that I’m using a bunch of girls to fight my battle for me

3) My team of little girls, who want to wear footie pajamas as our uniform

If we win, I’ll get to keep the new bike I worked so hard for. If we lose, well … I won’t let us lose. I can do this all on my own if I have to. Because I got da moves.

Chapter One

Fight for Your Right to Slumber Party

Chapter Two:

Unregistered Weapons

Chapter Three:

Featherweight Class

Chapter Four:

Pillow Fight of Epic Proportions

Chapter Five:

Pillow Fight like a Girl

Chapter Six:

Cheater Pajama Pants

Chapter Seven:

Pill-Owned

Chapter Eight:

Pillow Fight Club

Chapter Nine:

Fighting Pillow with Pillow

Chapter Ten:

Out like a Light

Chapter Eleven:

Cycle of Friendship

I rammed my fist into a punching bag hanging from the ceiling. My knuckles ignited with what felt like fire. I shook my hand out to get rid of the burn.

Dad carried a box of electronic equipment past me to the corner of Mom’s new aerobics studio in the fitness center my parents had decided to build. Grand opening this weekend. Which meant Dad would finally get to run his own company with all the business lessons he’d been giving me, and Mom would make money teaching other women how to dance in a Zumba class. They also hired other trainers who would teach the awesome classes like kickboxing and boot camp.

Joe, you probably want to wait to punch the bag until the boxing gloves I ordered arrive.

Oh. Yeah. That would help.

I lifted a leg instead and whipped the top of my foot around, planting shoelaces in the middle of the bag like I was a karate champion. Then I spun and rammed my other foot straight behind me into the pretend opponent. Take that, I said.

Because pretend fighting isn’t as fun without a little smack talk.

The bag swung away.

Imagining it to be the bad guy retreating, I lifted my arms overhead in victory and faced my make-believe crowd of adoring fans.

I could almost hear them whistling and clapping.

I got da moves!

Oof. What felt like a brick wall slammed into my back. Revenge of the punching bag.

I stumbled forward, tripped on my own foot, and did the only thing I could think of to keep from crashing to the ground. I screamed.

It didn’t work. The shiny, new wood floor rushed up to greet me.

I reached my hands out and tried to stop my fall, but gravity won, and I slammed my face against the slick, wooden planks.

A stabbing pain ricocheted through my skull. I rolled onto my back to ease the pressure, but little birdies flew around my head anyway. I closed my eyes to block the dizziness I’d feel if I watched their circular flight pattern.

"You certainly got da moved by the punching bag." Dad said. He didn’t seem too worried. He probably figured a little concussion was nothing compared to my past accidents of breaking ribs, breaking my nose, and slicing a thumb open.

I opened my eyes. Sure.

No reason to interrupt him from work. I’d just check myself out.

I reached for my face to see if fire crackers had really been shoved up my nostrils or if it just felt like an explosion.

Huh. Still in one piece.

I gingerly swiped the tingling skin underneath my nose to test for blood, and my hand came away clean.

Another good sign.

I’d be able to stand up in a few minutes when the ceiling stopped spinning.

Sneakers squeaked against hardwood. Isabelle’s multiple heads appeared above me. Gradually they merged into one face as my vision focused. What happened to you?

Lying on the floor after getting beat up by gym equipment was not a good way to impress the girl. I’m taking a break from my workout.

She smiled. You got your caboodle kicked by a punching bag, didn’t you?

I pushed myself up, acting as if I was okay, but my super loud grunt of pain might have given me away. Maybe.

Well, your eyes are turning black like your sister’s, but at least she was beat up by a real person just now.

All the words from Isabelle’s sentence faded away except for the part about black eyes. I’d never had a black eye before, but even if I had, that wasn’t nearly as cool as having two black eyes. I cranked my head toward the wall of mirrors to admire the beautiful battle wounds.

Wowza. I crawled closer to my reflection to get a better look at the dark purple rings forming.

Isabelle’s image frowned above me. She crossed her arms and tapped her foot.

Why? She had to be a little fascinated with my injury. What had she said about it? Something about how I looked like … oops … my little sister. I gritted my teeth as I stood. And not just because standing made my forehead throb. What happened to Christine?

Dad looked up from the stereo. Something happened to Christine?

I could be annoyed that Dad seemed more concerned with my sister’s injury than mine, but she probably wouldn’t be as proud of her