Tales My Lama Told Me

By DAVID LAI

H. E. Tsem Rinpoche is famous for mesmerising his friends and students with hours upon hours of incredible teachings. Within each teaching is an epic story that will move, inspire and bring about an entirely new perspective of life, spirituality and everything in between.  For the first time, these incredible tales are brought together in to a single collection of short stories by the author and also a dedicated student, David Lai. This timeless collection of 21 short stories tells the tale of saints, sinners, struggles and utter devotion. Keeping the original flavour and wisdom of H.E. Tsem Rinpoche that is conveyed from the gentle heart of a loyal disciple, these gripping tales will magically unfold before your very eyes as you turn the pages of Tales My Lama Told Me.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kechara Media & Publications Sdn Bhd
• Release date: Jan 12, 2012
• ISBN: 9789675365607

Book preview

Prologue

I first met H.E. Tsem Rinpoche, about seven years ago, at the gym. Aside from noticing how he worked out with dumbbells and barbells, I had no idea who he was or what he did for a living. However, he did reveal, during one of the initial verbal encounters we had, that he was a lecturer of Buddhism. This revelation piqued my interest and it made me want to get to know him better.

When I first met him, I found him to be particularly intimidating with his standoffish looks but I soon discovered a different side of him when I got to know him better. He was a great conversationalist with a witty, Americanised sense of humour. From the few initial conversations we had, he seemed to be an intellectual and was quite opinionated about almost every subject I brought up. On top of that, I also noticed that he possessed an uncanny ability to relate to me even when I didn’t reveal much about myself. At times, I could have sworn that he knew more about me than I even knew of myself! But he didn’t seem to talk much about Buddhism, of which I was dying to know more.

That opportunity soon came when I was invited to a teaching for the very first time. By then, I already knew that he was not going to be like an ordinary scholar giving dry scholastic speeches in front of bored students at a lecture hall. Just before the invitation came, I was invited to an obscure Kechara Paradise store that he owned and I found it to be filled with exotic Buddha deities, ritual implements, books and photos upon photos of old monks that seemed to exude a sense of warmth and kindness. Rinpoche’s friend explained his identity and the joyful Monastery (The Monastery’s name, Gaden, means Joyous Heaven) that he came from.

Many photos of Rinpoche in robes, during his younger and more emaciated days at the monastery, hung on the wall. He looked very different at every stage of his life, with or without robes. It was fascinating to find out that he was not just a lecturer but also a spiritual guide to many people across all age groups. My guide in the store was a young student of Rinpoche’s who had followed his teachings for many years. Although English was not his mother tongue, the young man did his best to explain everything to me, from the fundamentals of Buddhism, the reason for the store, Gaden Monastery and so on, down to what the word Rinpoche meant. He told me that Rinpoche is a title meaning precious one. It is bestowed upon selected teachers (monks or laypeople) who had particular compassion, knowledge and wisdom to teach the Dharma. Before this, I just knew Rinpoche as a person called Kai, which, he told me, meant ocean in Hawaiian. Now this oceanic man turned out to be a precious one!

It was rather a lot to take in. As I was digesting all this, an invitation to a teaching arrived not long after. It was to be given to a close group of students and friends huddled together in the very same store I visited not too long ago. That evening, I was late because I had just come from work but I was brimming with anticipation. During that period, I had just started to read about Buddhism and I already liked its pragmatic view of reality. Hence, I expected a mind-blowing profound discourse that explored the finer aspects of Buddhist philosophy, but Rinpoche completely blew my mind away. The teaching he gave that night had a tremendous impact on me mainly because I had never heard anything more practical, relational or funnier than what he said.

After that, I decided that I wanted to learn more from Rinpoche. So I diligently read up and attended as many teachings, and soaked in as much knowledge as I could. Rinpoche continued to give numerous teachings and I was fortunate to have received many explanations and elaborations from him personally. At times he would quote from books and sometimes it would be from memory. His words were mainly recollections of teachings that he himself had received many years ago when he was an eager student listening at the feet of his own Lamas.

I found out that Rinpoche is actually a fully ordained monk but he had requested permission from his teachers and the monastery to be in lay clothes for a number of reasons, one of which was to be closer to his students and friends in order to teach more effectively. I was fine with this explanation but I could see that it affected quite a number of people because it drew plenty of criticism (which seemed to be fuelled by jealousy). Now in retrospect, I can clearly see that none of the criticism really affected him or his work. He just believed in what his teachers instructed him to do years ago - to come to Malaysia and teach the Dharma. He is now gaining tremendous respect not because he now wears robes again but because his thoughts, words and actions totally exemplify the Dharma and his success has awed, inspired and silenced many doubts.

It wasn’t long before Rinpoche - along with his students and friends - founded a Buddhist centre called Kechara House. I am proud to be a part of its history especially because at that time, nobody realised how influential and powerful it would become. I was excited about it because I felt that Rinpoche would be giving even more teachings and I was really looking forward to the experiences. I had always found Rinpoche’s teachings to be fun and filled with laughter, intriguing and sometimes exciting because he seemed to always defy expectations with what he was going to say or do. There is no other spiritual teacher quite like Rinpoche.

Over the years, I began to notice that among all the wonderful qualities that I liked about Rinpoche, one was the way he gave his teachings. His story-telling abilities, which seemed to highlight or emphasise a particular point, was what I liked the most. The many wonderful stories he has told have endearingly stuck in my mind, evoking pleasant memories that I have come to associate with each particular teaching. Even in the early days, I heard quite a lot of these precious stories and I seem to remember them better than the actual message embedded within these tales, as explained by Rinpoche.

I found that my retention of all these stories came in handy when I joined the organisation many years ago. Rinpoche and some of his faithful students had started a chain of Dharma stores called Kechara Paradise. They were beautifully constructed retail stores that sold statues, malas, offering bowls, jewellery and all manner of artefacts from the Himalayas. The stores appeared outwardly commercial but inwardly a wonderful place to express the Dharma to willing listeners off the street – spiritual seekers that were eagerly waiting for their lives to be touched by Rinpoche’s teachings. So, whenever I did my stints at the stores, I found great joy in relating Rinpoche’s wonderful tales to these people.

However, although many listened to (and, I hope, enjoyed) my stories, not many were interested in buying what I had to offer at the store. Perhaps my stories were mere empty words or perhaps I was just not good at selling. However, I do recall that Rinpoche had said to me that by working at the store, I would find my way to becoming a writer somehow. I thought at the time it was an ambiguous prediction, but somehow situations and circumstances did change and the prediction came to pass. Although initially reluctant, I eventually found myself within the Kechara Media & Publications department being the one thing I didn’t think I could be – a writer.

In this department, I encountered these little story gems of Rinpoche’s once again while working on direct transcripts of his teachings. I figured that since these stories are so irresistible to me, they would also appeal to many people out there. So I decided to compile them into a book to share them with you. I have chosen to present each story in a way that best reveals its subtle message of spirituality in accordance with Rinpoche’s teachings. I also had to find a suitable chapter heading for each little story that would best encapsulate the spirit of Rinpoche’s teaching when he related the tale. In the re-telling of these stories, I have included some of the colloquial expressions, jokes and teasing that so often characterise the delivery of Rinpoche’s teachings. By doing so, I hope that you will enjoy them in the same way I did when I first heard them from Rinpoche.

In editing and compiling these tales, it has not been possible to include every story I have heard from Rinpoche. Selecting the stories for this book was very difficult for me. I loved every single story that Rinpoche had told me as every word spoken by Rinpoche in the telling of each tale is infused with wisdom, honesty, humour, passion and pure genius. In the end, we (with the helpful editors and proofreaders) still had to edit some out so that readers would receive the best stories that Rinpoche has ever told. Looking at them in their final form, I think the team has done an excellent job of preserving the message and intent of each one.

While editing the book, the other thing I needed to come up with was a title. I initially thought of several names that I believed were suitable for the theme of the book but somehow I wasn’t satisfied. At first, I thought the initial title Tales by a Neon Lama was fantastic but it was not what I had in mind for the book and so I had to keep searching. Meanwhile, I had some setbacks with my schedule; other projects took precedence and this book was shelved for quite a while.

I had almost forgotten about it until I found the manuscript one day while clearing my desk and I had to kick myself for not prioritising it. I really think that the book has great potential in bringing insightful messages to the world through the simple medium of short stories. I looked again at my original uninspiring title and just knew that it had to be changed. It took me quite a while to come up with another name but eventually, I found its new title, "Tales My Lama Told Me.."

In the great Buddhist tradition, developing compassion is praised as a method towards achieving an awakened mind. Hence, many teachings and meditational techniques have been developed to extend the natural love we have for our mothers to all beings - including those who have wronged us. Great masters, through powerful contemplative practices, achieved such an all-encompassing love. Hence, a very old tradition of hagiographies developed in the Buddhist tradition. These hagiographies were of great masters whose conduct and teachings often defied social convention but had a lasting impact upon their students and the society of their time.

The tradition of hagiographies has descended and survived in the great monasteries and oral tradition of Tibet. These hagiographies are known as "namthar," which is Tibetan for ‘great liberation’. Generally, these are stories meant to inspire those on the spiritual path. They are highly popular and have since been widely read both for entertainment and also for scholarly pursuits in explaining the finer aspects of Buddhist philosophy. Hence, the namthar stories are perhaps the most accessible of all the varied genres of Buddhist literature.

This is why Rinpoche has liberally sprinkled his own teachings with namthar stories which make the subject matter of his teachings more accessible. The first part of this book comprises mainly traditional tales that have been told for generations in the monastery. These are mainly popular accounts of great Buddhist saints and their indomitable pursuit of Enlightenment through sometimes magical, difficult and awkward encounters with their spiritual guides. These popular tales are told with a particular sensitivity towards the modern listener, which make these stories more real and accessible within our contemporary world.

The second part of the book consists of stories from Rinpoche’s own experiences. These are very rare accounts of Rinpoche’s heart-wrenching childhood, his years spent with his eminent teachers and even a humorous account of how he came to Malaysia. These are incredible tales of struggle, heartache, laughter and the pursuit of spirituality that amazingly began in his childhood. The stories contained within this second part demystify many aspects of an incarnate Lama and provide new perspectives as well as inspiration for would-be spiritual seekers everywhere.

I look forward to sharing the stories in this book with you. They offer joy, laughter, tears and inspiration. In this regard, I would like to reiterate that the main compelling influence for these stories is Rinpoche himself. Consequently, I have left many of Rinpoche’s original words in this book, just as he conveyed them to me, rather than to distract the readers too much with my comments. I do hope that in reading these tales, you will be blessed with the same magic as I was when I first listened to them.

chapter 1

the snobbish saint

One of the earliest stories of Guru Devotion that I heard from Rinpoche was a tale of an ancient Brahmin. I remember at the time, I was with Rinpoche in his personal library and he was going over some books. Soon, our conversation led to Rinpoche relating the story of The Snobbish Saint, followed by an illuminating explanation on Guru Devotion which held me spellbound. This wonderful tale is the first story in the book not only because it is one of my favourite stories, but also because it reminds me of the many times I myself felt stuck with self-made rules, superficial appearances and other peoples’ opinions. The moral of this story is about freeing oneself from such limitations.

In the old Indian kingdom of Manidhara, there lived a Mahasiddha known as Bhadrapa. His name means the snob in Sanskrit, probably because he was a Brahmin of the highest social caste.

Just as in the case of all members of the Brahmin priesthood (the highest caste in India’s social caste system), Bhadrapa had to oversee all religious ceremonies and rituals to appease the gods. In order to perform his duties well, one of the conditions he had to fulfil was to remain ritually pure. Hence, his entire life was dictated by the strict rules of conduct laid out within ancient texts that governed the ritual purity of his caste.

Like all orthodox Brahmins, Bhadrapa would not drink wine, consume pork or go to unclean places such as charnel grounds. He would not have been permitted to associate with people of lower castes such as sweepers, washers, meat sellers and wine sellers; this also meant that he could not have physical contact with any of these people. He would not even be allowed within close proximity to them nor allowed to speak to them. And of course, he would never be allowed to have such people come into his home. Contravention of any of the above would defile him. Once a Brahmin was defiled, his peers would ostracise him and he would end up a social outcast.

The Brahmin was a fastidious priest and such a stickler to the ancient rules that not only had he never eaten pork or drank wine, he had never even dared utter those profane words. On top of that, he would not allow any menstruating women to be in his presence and he would never work up a sweat so as to avoid becoming dirty. That was how fanatical he was with his practice; those suffocating rules governed his entire life.

In everyone’s eyes, the Brahmin was incredibly rich, educated, powerful and well-respected for his exemplary conduct. But he was highly insecure and constantly concerned about how people regarded him. He was always worried about others’ opinions of him and was adamant in maintaining his untarnished reputation.

Usually, he would only keep the company of his high-browed Brahmin friends. One day, they left early for their ablutions and he was alone at home. Then, he heard a knock on the door. When he opened the door, he was shocked to see a wiry-haired mendicant, in rags, standing on his doorstep. The mendicant greeted the Brahmin and begged for food. Since he was alone, the Brahmin had no choice but to respond to the yogin. He instinctively waved him off and shouted at him, Go away! You are dirty and you defile my home!

He had to get the ugly, smelly, lice-ridden old yogin out of his home quickly before anyone saw him associating with this unclean person, for fear of ruining his reputation and being defiled. However, the yogin was unperturbed and asked indignantly, What do you mean by ‘dirty?

"What do I mean by ‘dirty?!’ shouted the enraged Brahmin, regarding his unwanted guest with contempt.

You have not washed yourself and you are wearing filthy rags. And what’s that in your hand? You have a food bowl made of a human skull and you smell really bad! That is what I mean. You are obviously from a very low caste. Now, go away before any of my friends see you!

Unmoved by the frantic shouts, the yogin stood right where he was and gazed unwaveringly at the Brahmin. That is not what makes you dirty, he said. What makes you dirty is aggression in your action, speech and mind. Now, that is really dirty! The subtle defilements of the mind are very dirty. There is no soap in this world that can wash a dirty mind. Only the Guru’s instructions can truly cleanse one of such impurities.

Upon hearing this, the Brahmin was surprisingly receptive and so the yogin was inspired to continue, this time by breaking into a song of advice to him. The Brahmin was moved by the song and wanted to hear more. The yogin thought about this for a while before saying, All right. Bring me some food and I will give you more teachings.

Okay, I will bring you some food, replied the Brahmin. But he suddenly remembered how he would look among his friends if he was seen giving food to a dirty, low-caste mendicant. I’ll give you some food. But my friends have no faith. If they see me here with you, I will be ostracised. Let me come to your place instead and I will offer you some food then.

All right, said the yogin, meet me tonight at the charnel ground nearby, where the dead are cremated.

As he walked away, he stopped and seemed to be deep in thought for a moment before saying, By the way, when you come, please bring me some pork and liquor.

Bhadrapa was horrified at the request as that was the biggest taboo in his books. I can’t do that! What if someone saw me? The yogin snapped, Well, if you want the Dharma, do as I say. Bring me pork and liquor, and we shall meet at the cremation grounds.

Okay, but it will have to be tonight, the Brahmin sheepishly agreed. The yogin walked away without saying anything more.

After the yogin left, Bhadrapa started to worry. His image, name, caste and all that he stood for were at stake. The tremendous disgrace that would befall him if he was caught disturbed his mind. Everything the yogin asked of him was totally against his beliefs.

How was he going to buy those unmentionable items that the yogin had demanded? It would cause a huge social scandal if he was caught doing that. Just thinking about purchasing the pork and liquor made him shudder, let alone actually going out and buying them. He paced back and forth, trying to find a solution. Then suddenly, he thought of a wonderful plan. He would disguise himself as a low-caste servant and shop for those things without being detected. The very thought of carrying out such a task was degrading but he wanted to hear the instructions from the yogin so badly that he went ahead with his plan.

At nightfall, when everyone was asleep, he crept out of his mansion disguised in a cloak with the forbidden items in his hands. He moved fast and headed to the charnel grounds, a desolate and lonely place lit by moonlight. The Guru appeared out of a little hovel and welcomed him. It was made of dried mud, excrement and urine, mixed together and thrown onto bamboo. The Brahmin was disgusted to see this but he tried to ignore it so