The Trivial Thing

By Van Alrik

In a near-future world of crime and crises, private detective Tin Baxter takes on a dispirited mother's plea to rescue her son from a faux-pious political mastermind who has taken control of his memories. A host of henchmen, including barbarous fraternal twins with a taste for human flesh, impede the way, and Baxter must match their wits one by one in order to win the boy, retain his memories and avoid becoming anyone’s next meal . . .

• Language: English
• Publisher: Van Alrik
• Release date: Jun 25, 2015
• ISBN: 9781311410931

Van Alrik

Van Alrik lives in the Rocky Mountains with his family and a small army of robot novelists. His debut novel The Trivial Thing was published in June 2015.

Book preview

The Trivial Thing

by

Van Alrik

Published by Van Alrik at Smashwords

Copyright © 2015 Van Alrik

Cover Design © 2015 Van Alrik

Cover Photo Old and New by Rennett Stowe (www.flickr.com/photos/tomsaint), used under CC BY 2.0 / Modified from original.

Cover Photo Two well-dressed men stand on the sand in front of town by simpleinsomnia (www.flickr.com/photos/simpleinsomnia), used under CC BY 2.0 / Modified from original.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in articles or reviews, without written permission from its publisher.

This is a work of fiction. The characters and events portrayed in this book are not based on any real persons, living or dead, and any similarity is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

WordNet 3.0 was used in the generation of this novel under the following copyright notice, statements, and disclaimer:

WordNet 3.0 Copyright 2006 by Princeton University. All rights reserved. THIS SOFTWARE AND DATABASE IS PROVIDED AS IS AND PRINCETON UNIVERSITY MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS OR WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED. BY WAY OF EXAMPLE, BUT NOT LIMITATION, PRINCETON UNIVERSITY MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS OR WARRANTIES OF MERCHANT-ABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PARTICULAR PURPOSE OR THAT THE USE OF THE LICENSED SOFTWARE, DATABASE OR DOCUMENTATION WILL NOT INFRINGE ANY THIRD PARTY PATENTS, COPYRIGHTS, TRADEMARKS OR OTHER RIGHTS.

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright Page

Table of Contents

Acknowledgements

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-one

Chapter Twenty-two

Chapter Twenty-three

Chapter Twenty-four

Chapter Twenty-five

Chapter Twenty-six

Chapter Twenty-seven

Chapter Twenty-eight

Chapter Twenty-nine

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty-one

Chapter Thirty-two

Chapter Thirty-three

Chapter Thirty-four

Chapter Thirty-five

Chapter Thirty-six

Chapter Thirty-seven

Chapter Thirty-eight

Chapter Thirty-nine

Chapter Forty

Chapter Forty-one

Chapter Forty-two

Chapter Forty-three

Chapter Forty-four

Chapter Forty-five

Chapter Forty-six

Chapter Forty-seven

Acknowledgements

Several works of fiction were used liberally in the generation of this novel using the Gutenberg corpus included in the Natural Language Toolkit (Bird, Steven, Ewan Klein, and Edward Loper (2009), Natural Language Processing with Python, O'Reilly Media) in Python 3.4 (www.python.org). These writings are all in the public domain and specifically included works by Jane Austen, William Blake, Sara Cone Bryant, Thornton W. Burgess, Lewis Carroll, G. K. Chesterton, Maria Edgeworth, Herman Melville, and Walt Whitman.

This book would not have been possible without the support and inspiration provided by my wife and children.

Chapter One

And the trivial thing was this, said Baxter.

So you shouldn't talk, said the boy's mother.

That embodied difficulties for Baxter which would cost delicacies, and that made easier for him that which should be hard. When they get along to their wine, quipped he, I'll speak a good voice for you, and get you called in before the kid is sent off.

And, contributed the woman who showed the cathedral, he took a go here these many, many winters. The mother's eyes shot daggers at the woman. Baxter listened, and looked, and presently perceived that the boy's mother, Mrs. Lamb, might be well delimited past the expressive phase of being out of humor.

Unusual! The Crofts are to have possession at Michaelma's Days; and as the kid nominated removing to Bath in the course of the foregoing month, there was no time to equal that lost in working every subject agreement. He paused. Three long years passed--

Then you shouldn't talk, said the boy's mother. Just here in that respect she was nothing to be shifted off in a wild conjecture about the boy's location.

Mrs. Lamb, I think it would do; copy should attain us a second stake in Sabbatum.

She got exposed herself for a few seconds in front the statue of queen Anne, in social movement of St. Paul the Apostle's cathedral, under the firm impression that it was a figure of the Virgin Mary. Do you not think these are something in Morton's style of painting, the Bay State maybe? She performs painting virtually delightfully! How beautiful her stopping point landscape exercise is!

He was not dissuaded. How, where, when? Let me know it entirely.

The cathedral overseer came in, the most reverend Petrol Bruder, and very soon went to the subject over again, away with the recurrence of his really frequent inquiry of considerably, my loves, how come your Word of God goes on? Have you anything sassy? The interview was over.

Like half the rest of the populace, if more than half on that point are that exist clever and good, Tin Baxter, with splendid faculties and a fantabulous disposition, was neither sane nor outspoken. He really matted-up scrupulously, vexed on the occasion; for the identical sweat to which he ex-gestedly circumscribed the operation of his promise to his founder and was by this senseless arrangement rendered impracticable. He turned on his heel and left.

He paused by a fountain shrine, the piece of furniture all sent around aside from the irrigate. Suddenly a hand on his arm. The mother, brought afterward a short intermit, and with a sort of congratulation: I've caught a certificate. Perhaps you could deliver it for me? Baxter smiled graciously and took the note.

* * *

This ogre-birth sucked me dry!

The smaller, hairier man rolled his eyes. Withals, Wick, it may well be believed that since we let such a ravenous fingerbreadth in the pie, it equals to view as just as wise to wait to tart him.

Bah. The larger man reached out a big paw and pushed the boy mildly. To his voluntary communications the men could sustain no approving reply, which only ignited their wrath more.

The larger man, Wick, continued. I stopped and unsounded the outdoor stage, then with light feel I from the face of this skinny, and the first just airlifted the blanket.

Who are you olderly gentleman's gentleman so haggard and down in the mouth, with well-gelled hair, and flesh all sunk about the eyes? We got the new toys, and now a nice mince Proto-Indo European, said the smaller.

The larger shrugged. Yeah, but what palace may it knock down?

I be certain the judge would pardon us in a moment. The smaller turned the spit another crank.

After another half dozen stock-still second bases the larger could stand it no more, only called out to the dwarfish thing -- in what words heaven knows: I tell you, Deck, that this man be too plump.

The theme! Deck slithered his apeish hands about the small screen of his plunder: cellular telephones B complex and C, as they were both good runners, the start they had won was decisive.

I can buoy the cable car, said the young boy in the fur crest with rocklike practicability. The police, with feature unreasonableness, will not accept either of your proposals; the result would be that we range about evading the police and get jumped off over the garden wall into that glorious garden to throw ourselves on their magnificent hospitality.

The larger looked up at the wall, then again poked the boy. He shook his head, bewildered at the outburst. Simply correct.

Up against the dark colors of the wall, pink wine, was the lightless bulk of the cathedral; and upon the top of the cathedral was a random splosh and peachy stain of snowfall, still clinging as to an alpine peak. The overseer suddenly came parading down the front steps opposite the garden wall, speaking on a cell phone.

Feature some wine, Bruder said in a furthering tone. I institutionalize no answer to them, meaning past that to conserve myself from her further notice; and for some time I was even determined to call in in Berkeley street; just at last, gauging it wise to affect the line of a cool down, plebeian acquaintance than anything else, I watched you all safely out of the house unitary forenooning, and went out on my name.

They were once again mum for many minutes. Away the curb toward the edge of the flagging, the smaller man worked at his wheel around, deflexioning over how he carefully held it to the pit, away foot and knee. With measured tread he changed states apace, as he pressed with within only a firm hired hand, issued forth then in voluminous gold jet planes, scintillating from the wheel around. Bruder's voice continued toward the alley.

I was immature erstwhile, merely I never was very handsome -- bad fortune for me. Very good, selfsame soundly, trumpeted the elephant. That suit of clothes suits me; we will do it. He hung up the phone and came into view of the men.

And his demeanor immediately changed. Well? Did he forget?

It may exist psychologically possible, answered the larger, and it for surely would explain his living certain he was wronged and his adjudicates being sure he was guilty. But I say we eat him anyway.

Well, the literary way is more or less improved, allowed Bruder cheerfully, but still I don't see what cooking in a lavatory like this does for you. Regardless, he ought to do.

Ignoring him, Deck added, Or, if for any reason cerebration to be corporeally handicapped for that, even such an one would seem superlatively competent to jolly along and howl on his underlings to the attack. He sharpened to a group of men, women and tiddlers, who be put together under the plaza, listening in assorted positions of attention to a man, who was fending upon a flight of steps talking in a loud part, and with a great deal action, to the people who surrounded him. So most likely to be daft of something. Then, as an afterthought, and I be agreed as to the eating.

Bruder made not to have merited it; he took in oftentimes them to be negligent or perverse, cold-shouldering his advice, or level wilfully defending him, indiscernible of half his virtues, and altercating with him because he would not acknowledge their false and brazen forecast of their own. He shook his head, repulsed.

What, has there been an overbold eruption? Hish! He goes straightly to his sire to tap me life. I recognize his constitution; and suppose I wear it like him? said the larger man.

Why not? inquired Bruder, chuffing at his cigar. Even out hope and abandon him; and go for a cordial which leaves the mind depressed and enfeebled. At present the show woman has only one lodger, the young man Todhunter here; but he has given more trouble than all the remainder, for he desires to tie the hands of the house. He blew smoke at the boy.

Wick chipped in again. There equals no uncertainty that he steal the Blackberries that be in the bucket when he see it, for he measuredly rust them. That's what the show woman said when she found that buster bear taking steal of the Blackberries he forged so hard to pick and then had played hitting with the pail. I was jumped, I finks, past the revision in his manners this morning. He makes not speaking corresponding himself, and coif not paying back your kindness with any cordiality.

At this moment, so critical for the boy, Todhunter, a party of urban soldiers opened the gate. Then ranging them ahead of him they skinnied the capstan, with their harpoons in their hands, and pieced his three captors standing at his side with their hands up, and the repose of the company moulded a forget me drug rhythm about the mathematical group. Bruder stood for an instant searchingly eyeing every man of the crew. If he had paused a second at the garden's edge it would suffer him nothing. As the captors followed living along the masses stared; not at the ruffians such a good deal -- for they were used to beholding barbarians like them in their streets -- merely at seeing them and Bruder upon such confidential terms. It was an atrocious thing, for which mankind die.

Chapter Two

Detective Tin Baxter, the energetic connoisseur of the East Bench, sat at his desk, opening letters and marking substantiations to the merry tune of a typewriter, fermented by vigorous exclamations of triumph.

I question whereabouts the city soldiers will trouble today. The good interfering between the colonel and our good overseer seemed preferable to declaring that the laurels of the mulberry-corner, the canalise, and the yew pergola, would all be made concluded; and good Mrs. Lamb taken for some time stopped to reckon at all of the affairs. And how could it possibly fall into your point?

His assistant echoed very disagreeably in his ear; merely as he could not be left unequaled, he was besides obligated to follow the managing director. For this intention, he pointed less at his body, and more at his throat and head. Give a thank you, gentleman's gentleman.

I don't dare visit, said the detective.

Truth held Baxter to recognize some small share in the pensiveness, merely as he was at the same time unwilling to come out as the benefactor of Black Pierce, the dismal who surely oversaw Bruder, that he recognized it with hesitation; which likely contributed to muddle that suspicion in his mind which had lately figured it. And then, presto! His triumphant exclamations returned. Why ruin a perfectly satisfactory bust?

Unfortunate bell! The boy's mother appeared, indignant. Baxter checked his watch. All dinner time authorized, and the office staff were so athirst, so busy, and so dazed, that not an eye observed the woman's dreary pick of finery.

Let him go. The woman stamped the typewriter from his desk, for when she looked down at her foot, they appeared to be almost out of sight, they equally coming so far off. I fear I break in on some of your scientific readies.

He had best to cut away his division of the machine and tow it home. Just, I presuppose, said Baxter, with a sigh, that our Todhunter mistook, when he said the young gentleman he himself had solitarily taken the goods. He wants to see the Pen, I daresay; I'm sure he has noble reason to need to take me in.

"When