Love is a Mess: A Supposed Crimes Anthology

By Supposed Crimes, LLC

Love is a Mess: A Supposed Crimes Anthology contains eight stories from eight authors on the topic of misfortune at Valentine's Day. The topics range from the fun of the moment to the power of the eternal. Lesbian, gay, and bisexual characters star in their own love and lust stories--Erotic, playful, and thoughtful.

Viral Valentine by L. M. Perrin
Date Blind by Geonn Cannon
The Politician and the Pilot by Amber Kinsey
Bar Tryst by Rachael Orman
Quarter Life: Energy Feed by Adrian J. Smith
Property of Cupid by Eva Lefoy
Private Dance by A. M. Leibowitz
The Last Mitzvah by Michael DuPuy

• Language: English
• Publisher: Supposed Crimes, LLC
• Release date: Jan 3, 2015
• ISBN: 9781938108761

Supposed Crimes, LLC

Supposed Crimes, LLC publishes fiction and poetry primarily featuring lesbian characters and themes. The focus is on genre fiction–Westerns, Science Fiction, Horror, Action–rather than just romance. That’s how we set ourselves apart from our competitors. Our characters happen to love women and kick ass.“Supposed crimes” refers to the idea that homosexuality was once outlawed. Thus, our authors are being subversive by writing. As times change this becomes more tongue-in-cheek. Yet, Christians writing lesbians and men writing lesbians are still subversive ideas in this industry. We encourage our authors to challenge stereotypes.

Book preview

Love is a Mess

A Supposed Crimes Anthology

Smashwords Edition

Supposed Crimes LLC, Matthews, North Carolina

2015

Published in the United States

ISBN: 978-1-938108-76-1

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Lesbian

Viral Valentine by L. M. Perrin

Date Blind by Geonn Cannon

The Politician and the Pilot by Amber Kinsey

Bar Tryst by Rachael Orman

Bisexual

Quarter Life: Energy Feed by Adrian J. Smith

Gay

Property of Cupid by Eva Lefoy

Private Dance by A. M. Leibowitz

The Last Mitzvah by Michael DuPuy

Viral Valentine

by L.M. Perrin

(Copyright L.M. Perrin - 2015 - All rights reserved)

It was supposed to be a simple prank. A little bit of drag, a little bit of sexual innuendo over dinner, a little bit of leaning so far forward that the fake boobs Todd had stuffed down his blouse fell out onto his plate. It was supposed to be funny, too. On paper it was comedy gold. Dude finds some lonely girl on Craigslist under the Women-Seeking-Women personals, dude sets up a Valentine’s Day dinner under the ruse of not wanting to spend another Valentine’s alone, dude dresses up like a girl and as dinner progresses drops more and more hints that he’s actually a guy while hidden cameras record the girl’s reaction. Totally Knoxville, Todd had gloated when he’d explained his latest prank idea to Paige. Guaranteed to go viral.

In practice it was painful to watch.

Tell him to stop, Paige whispered into her walkie-talkie. She was stuffed into a heavy-duty garbage bin, drenched in sweat, knees pressed into her chest, operating one of the hidden cameras. Specifically the camera that had been selected for the victim’s close ups. She watched as Todd leaned across the table again and subtly tried to shake his fake breasts out of his shirt. Ellie, the girl Todd had managed to hook up with, looked to be about thirty seconds from bursting into tears. Paige couldn’t hear their conversation, but she’d spent the last forty-five minutes watching every slight flicker of emotion as it crossed Ellie’s face up close and in high definition. Whatever Todd was saying wasn’t shocking Ellie, it was upsetting her, and the longer it went on the more disgusted with herself Paige became.

Paige thumbed her walkie-talkie on again. I’m serious, Jeremy, she whispered. Tell him to stop.

Jeremy, safe in the van as he monitored Todd’s audio levels, said nothing, but a moment later Paige saw Todd glance her way. He raised one eyebrow and she knew her message had been conveyed. For the life of her she didn’t understand how it was something Todd even needed to be told. How could he not see how completely uncomfortable and dejected Ellie was? Girls crying did not viral videos make.

He’s going to make her cry, Paige muttered to Jeremy, just in case Todd really was that obtuse and needed a good reason to cut his pranking short.

I told him that, Jeremy crackled back. He’s trying too hard.

Paige watched as Todd propped his chin in his hand and twirled a strand of his blonde wig around his index finger. She saw his mouth move then watched as Ellie dropped her chin to her chest, desperately trying to hide her tears. Paige swore. She lifted one arm, knocking the top off of the garbage bin, and struggled to stand. If Todd wasn’t going to call the prank off himself then she’d make it impossible for him to continue. The top of the bin clattered to the floor, and Paige blushed as she straightened, aware of how ridiculous she must look to the diner full of people.

It’s a prank! Todd announced, throwing his hands up and smiling even as he shot Paige a look that said he was going to kill her. There’s the camera girl!

Paige lifted the camera awkwardly.

You’re going to be on YouTube! Todd said, his voice tight with forced enthusiasm. He tore off his wig. See? I’m a dude!

Ellie stood slowly, staring at him in mortified horror. She reached blindly for her winter coat, all the while backing away from Todd slowly. Todd was trying desperately to cover himself. He wasn’t used to people being upset after her revealed the set up. Usually they laughed and shook their heads and asked to watch the footage, but Ellie was doing none of those things. She was staring at him like he’d grown a second head, her body language screaming that she was about to bolt.

Paige lifted one leg delicately, trying to extricate herself from the bin without tripping and sending herself crashing face first to the floor.

A prank, she heard Ellie repeat slowly. Her voice was low, guarded and unsure.

A prank, Todd agreed. Pretty good, huh?

Paige hopped free of the bin and stood to the side of Ellie and Todd awkwardly, her ability to offer sympathy to Ellie’s obvious distress by her own involvement in the other girl’s embarrassment. Ellie studied Todd before glancing at Paige for a moment, and Paige felt the glare like a punch in the gut. She shifted uncomfortably and jammed her thumbs into the pockets of her jeans. She wanted to tell Ellie how sorry she felt, how shitty she knew the prank was, how she’d tried to get Todd to stop sooner, but the hurt in Ellie’s pale brown eyes left her embarrassed and tongue-tied.

Pretty good? Are you serious? Ellie whispered brokenly. She took a step back and zipped her coat, shaking her head.

No, you can’t leave, you have to sign—Paige, don’t let her leave! Todd instructed. He bent and began rummaging through the tote he’d brought along as a prop, searching for the waiver he’d written up. Ellie was watching Paige suspiciously, as if she expected Paige to grab her. Paige offered a small smile that she hoped was reassuring, tried to think of something that would make it all a little less horrible, but Ellie made a hoarse choking sound and bolted for the door before Paige had a chance.

Hey! Todd shouted. Dammit, Paige—

Whatever else he had to say, Paige didn’t hear. She bolted into the cold after Ellie, shoving past a couple about to enter the diner and apologizing distractedly. No, wait—Ellie, wait!

Ellie was walking briskly, her shoulders pulled up to her ears and her head down.

Ellie! Paige shouted desperately.

Go away, Ellie said angrily. I’m not signing anything.

I don’t want you to sign anything! Paige darted in front of her, her hands up, her breath clouding in front of her face. The cold bit into her bare arms, and she could feel the heat that had built up in her blood after sweating in the garbage bin quickly being leeched away by the freezing February air. Ellie was crying, her brown eyes rimmed with red. Please. I just want to apologize.

You shouldn’t have to apologize! Ellie shouted. Behind her, a man paused and shot Paige a questioning glance. Elle swiped at her eyes angrily. You never should have done it!

Paige winced. I know—

What’s wrong with you people?!? Ellie demanded. It’s Valentine’s Day!

Paige ran a hand through her hair nervously. I know. I know. It was stupid and horrible—

All I wanted, Ellie barreled on, was to not spend Valentine’s Day sitting at home watching Netflix. So I said sure, I’ll go out with another perfect stranger, because at least she’s lonely too, and of course… Ellie’s voice wavered, and she looked away quickly. She bit her lip, and Paige could tell she was doing her best not to burst into tears again. She shook her head. Thank you for helping me realize being alone at home isn’t the worst way to spend a night. She moved to brush past Paige. Paige grabbed her arm desperately.

Ellie, please—

Ellie spun, jerking her arm from Paige’s grip. What do you want from me? she demanded angrily.

Paige took a step back, aware of the looks they were now getting from the other pedestrians. She wrapped her arms around her stomach, trying to trap some heat and disguise the fact that she was shivering, and shook her head. Nothing. I swear. I just wanted to say I’m sorry.

Fine. You said it. Now I’m going home.

No, please… Paige reached out again. Ellie drew back guardedly, and Paige awkwardly put her arm against her stomach again. Please let me make it up to you.

How? Ellie snorted sarcastically. Going to throw a pie in my face?

No. Paige shook her head emphatically. She knew she couldn’t honestly expect Ellie to take her apology at face value—not after her involvement in the prank—but she was desperate to try. Listen, I’m… Paige bit her lip. She held her hand out. I’m Paige.

Ellie eyed Paige’s outstretched hand warily for a moment before lifting her eyes to Paige’s. She glared. It wasn’t nice to meet you, Paige. Have a good night.

Paige sidestepped neatly in front of her before she was even fully conscious of deciding she wasn’t going to let Ellie walk away. She winced and fought the urge to make herself small under Ellie’s angry gaze. I’m Paige, she repeated. And I’m trying to say sorry for my friend being a jerk.

You’re a jerk, too, Ellie snapped. What, you couldn’t tell him that destroying someone’s Valentine’s Day was a horrible idea?

Paige dropped her hand slowly. She shoved both hands into her pockets and slouched. How was she supposed to admit that she was in the same boat as Ellie? That she’d known the prank had the potential to go bad from the beginning, but it had gotten her out of the house. She’d wanted—needed—to be distracted from her loneliness for one night, and Todd had given her the perfect opportunity to do just that. She hadn’t been as worried about ruining someone else’s night as she had been about making sure her own wasn’t depressingly normal. I could have, she admitted quietly. I mean, Todd is…I go along with things I shouldn’t sometimes. She lifted her head, trying to pour all the earnestness she felt into her words. But none of us wanted to hurt you.

No, you just wanted to make me look absolutely ridiculous, Ellie snapped. She jabbed a finger into Paige’s chest, and Paige took a startled step back. I knew he wasn’t a girl, Ellie growled. "I’m not stupid. But