When I Was Five I Killed Myself: A Novel

By Howard Buten

Burton Rembrandt has the sort of perspective on life that is almost impossible for adults to understand: that of an eight-year-old. And to Burt, his parents and teachers seem to be speaking a language he cannot understand. This is Burt’s story as written in pencil on the walls of the Quiet Room in the Children’s Trust Residence Center, where he lands after expressing his ardent feelings for a classmate. It begins: When I was five I killed myself. Rarely has a child’s particular frame of mind been so indelibly set down on the page as in this extraordinary novel. In When I Was Five I Killed Myself, Howard Buten renders with astounding insight and wry language the tale of a young boy testing the boundaries of love and life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Penguin Group
• Release date: Jun 24, 2014
• ISBN: 9781468309959

Reviews for When I Was Five I Killed Myself

[aspirit-1 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Superbly written story that shows how the misunderstandings between adults and neurodivergent children can lead to life-altering mistakes.

[jeffome · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Loved this book. Unbelievable capturing of what it is like to be 8! Picked this up from a friend who was downsizing his book collection and both the title and the cover intrigued me. A very quick read with moments that made me want to find Burt, the main character and give him a big hug and tell him it will all be OK.....and for me, that's something! A little sad, but that part is the whole point. Highly recommended.

[kamgeb · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

The reviews say it is a modern Catcher in the Rye. The problem is the charachters are young (about 9) and end up having sex. It just seems like a person who has little kids having sex is bizarre. Also the boy seemed to be psychotic at times and I couldn't empathize with him most of the time.

[posthumose · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Written in English by France's noted autistic specialist, it has been read by millions in France alone. This psychologist has written 5 books on his subject. This is his only fiction.This is more than a good novel. The main character is a troubled boy narrating and navigating his way through a difficult time in his life; and the understanding and help, or lack of it, from those he encounters along the way. It is one of a kind.

[wispywillow · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Amazing.I was putting away books at the university library where I work when I came across this book. The title grabbed my attention immediately, so, out of curiosity, I tucked it away to read when I had free time.It's something like a cross between Girl, Interrupted, The Catcher in the Rye, and Sesame Street, oddly enough. That's the only way I can describe it.