Letting Go and New Beginnings: A Mother's Poetic Journey

By Margaret Dubay Mikus

International Book Award Finalist--E-Book Autobiography/ Biography/Memoir.
Global E-Books Honorable Mention--Parenting/ Family Non-Fiction

"Letting Go and New Beginnings: A Mother's Poetic Journey" is a compelling, personal story told through insightful, accessible poetry and evocative photographs in support of parents whose teens are leaving home. Intended to encourage family understanding, heal rifts, and ease the pain of separation, it gives voice to a swirling complexity of emotions. Sharing these sometimes funny, sometimes bittersweet poems may help family relationships grow closer, deeper, and richer. You may also become more aware of how your parents felt in letting you go.

"It's the story of loving and letting go, the bittersweet feeling all parents feel, all people feel when our cherished ones start to move on. I found the poems to be beautiful and timely-mirroring the transition I find myself in now-letting go, new beginnings. I also love how the imagery of the photographs expresses and compliments the intentions of the poems."
-Karen Gottlieb

"...very reflective and takes some of us back on our own journey, yet inspirational for those about to embark on the journey. There was a section 'to my daughter' that I clipped for my daughter to read. I also found myself laughing out loud as I read some parts. Well done!"
-Lena Dobbs-Johnson

"Margaret's poems are always personal, yet universal, in that any sensitive reader will be able to identify with the thoughts they embody ... lyrical ... concise and still as elaborate as prose .... This particular anthology focuses on letting go of your children 'when their hours are no longer woven into the fabric of your days.' [She] not just gives voice to feelings that are often repressed, but sincerely seeks to heal. Above all this is a labor of love from a...loving mother, adorned with words from the heart and simple photographs that complement the words beautifully. I highly recommend this book... to all sensitive readers who are working on letting go in any way."
-Pramod Uday

A Poem From "Letting Go and New Beginnings"

2/24/08

After You Left

Constantly
I am watching out for you.
Even when I am not watching,
I am watching.

I cannot say why this is true
or when it began,
it feels like forever
my love.

So do me a great favor
and become...not less carefree
nor less careless,
nor even more careful,

for being full of care
is not it exactly.
Be more aware of your choices,
more in tune with your inner wisdom.

For you are wise dear one.

And if I am selfish
and want you to stay with me
when it is clearly time to go,
forgive...

and go.
Call me when you arrive.
I will be waiting.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
(c) 2008

• Language: English
• Publisher: Margaret Dubay Mikus
• Release date: Jan 25, 2011
• ISBN: 9781452423494

Margaret Dubay Mikus

Margaret Dubay Mikus is a poet, singer, healer, photographer, and storyteller. She earned a Ph.D. in Microbiology from the University of Chicago in 1982, headed for a promising career in molecular genetics research and teaching. Life had other plans. After healing from multiple sclerosis in 1995, she had a creative reawakening which led her to begin a poetic journal to “sing from the Heart.” A year later she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Writing turned out to be an essential part of Margaret’s integrative approach to healing. Later, she used her poems as writing prompts when teaching her "Expanding Our Possibilities" (TM) workshop series. Her poems, photos and essays have been published in literary journals, magazines, newsletters, and anthologies, both online and in print. She was honored to be the Illinois Featured Author for the "Willow Review" in 2013. Her acclaimed poetry collections and inspiring CD have supported many people in making positive life changes. Margaret met Stephen Mikus in an English class when they were at the University of Michigan. They have been married since 1974 and have two grown children. More about her work and her uplifting story can be found on her website, www.FullBlooming.com. Check out the 67 poem-videos and essays with other poems on her blog.

Book preview

TIMELINE

Blake graduates from high school—2002

Alex graduates from high school—2005

Blake at college—2002-2006 (graduation)

Alex at college—2005-2009 (graduation)

Cancer surgeries for MDM—2007

Remodeling—summer through autumn, 2009

Blake moves back home—July, 2009

Alex moves back home—September, 2009

Blake moves out—August, 2010

Alex moves out—September, 2011

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Working on this book caused me to think back to my parents letting me go off to the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor in 1970 (a very tumultuous time in the world). I was the second of seven children, first one to go away to college. In my eagerness to soar, how little I understood how hard that was! Thanks Mom and Dad. I am also grateful to my mother, Virginia Dubay Post, who wanted to support her oldest daughter and enthusiastically agreed to provide fresh eyes to proofread an earlier version of the manuscript. My sister, Marie Smith, provided assistance and support. Alexandra Mikus, my beautiful, multi-talented daughter, proofed the final manuscript and gave design suggestions. I am most grateful! Errors that remain are mine alone.

Letting go of your children is a lifelong process from birth letting go, and letting go, letting go, but there are times of particular sharpness, when they leave home to go out into the wider world, when their hours are no longer woven into the fabric of your days. For this book, I chose selections from my poetic journal written when our son, Blake, went off to the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana, followed three years later by our daughter, Alex. I am most grateful for their support and permission to use these poems and photos of them. They continue to inspire me.

Congenial conversations with Mary Ann Brady-Rhodes of Burr House Bed and Breakfast in Bloomington, Illinois (a two-college town) led me to begin this book. I wanted to support families during this essential, but often difficult time. Her warmth, insight, and hospitality were most appreciated. I am always grateful for the enthusiasm and encouragement of Stephen, my husband since 1974, life partner, soul mate, and dearest friend, who continues to challenge me to be my best. Thank you to those who nurtured the fragile new shoot of this book by commenting on early versions of the manuscript, including Sharon Monday, Karen Gottlieb, Brigitte Bernold, Karen Baker, Barbara Nealon, and Stephen Mikus. Brigitte also contributed to the title. Kip Snyder is my voice teacher and a superb listener. Singing with him since the early 1990s encouraged me to release negativity in recovering my true voice (both singing and writing). He commented on many of these poems and titled the cover photo. Many people generously listened and graciously commented on poems over the years. Thank you to all of you who helped keep me