Connives and Forks

By Erik Ga Bean

Turbulent times at the North Pole reunite four childhood friends more than thirty years after they shared a magical Christmas morning. Can the novice crew of a flying bus get to the bottom of a robbery and round up enough reindeer to free the elves.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Erik Ga Bean
• Release date: Aug 27, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301568383

Erik Ga Bean

Science fiction fan, astronomy enthusiast and IT professional Erik Ga Bean lives in the English county of Hertfordshire with his wife Helen and his growing collection of carnivorous plants. As well as being an author, he is a keen narrowboater and a leading light in the Stevenage Plus social group.

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Connives & Forks

By Erik Ga Bean

Published by Erik Ga Bean at Smashwords

Copyright 2013 Erik Ga Bean

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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To my wonderful wife Helen.

Chapter 1

Carl had made a reasonable amount of money when he sold his business in the year that he turned forty. His main career of doing things to the internet with computers had been very successful during the decades either side of the Millennium. He told himself that he got rid of the business as it had lost its novelty in a world where everyone was using the internet.

Carl's wife Sarah often used the phrase midlife crisis when describing his decision. She had learned mostly to say this only when Carl was not in the room. This was quite often the case since she moved out of nannying and into concert tour management. To her, looking after toddlers and looking after rock stars employed a very similar skill set. Despite this, the pay was much better and there was more chance to see the world in the music industry.

Instead of buying an impractical sports car and running off in it with a younger woman, Carl was spending his midlife crisis on a bus. Very little of this time passed with him actually on board. The bus was a retired public service vehicle which had spent many a mile ferrying the single mothers and the elderly of Yeovil around the town. Since its retirement it had mostly been parked in the large garden of Carl and Sarah's six bedroom house, just outside a village in the northern home counties of England.

Three years in to the project it should have been the motor home of his dreams. He and Sarah should have been touring Europe in it, surrounded by all the luxuries of home. As things were it would have looked entirely familiar to the Somerset bus pass holder. Sarah had long since lost faith in the project. Her placing around the house of catalogues for the professionally built dedicated RVs, which Carl was perfectly able to afford, had not been well received.

Carl's strong urge had been to abandon his life spent in front of various computer screens and to do something much more hands on with his time. The reason that his life to that point had been spent using computers was that this was where his talents lay. It was also how he had spent most of his time on the project. He had sourced and ordered the bus online. He had used special software to painstakingly design the envisaged end result. He had filled the garage with every tool and component that he would need to complete the project. The most practical step that he had actually taken was to complete a course in bus driving. He had spent many hours preparing for this on a computer simulator.

On this particular December Friday morning Carl was actually on the bus when his unexpected visitor arrived. He was well into the disassembly phase of the project, aimlessly unbolting things. Sarah was due home in about three weeks from the Australian phase of the tour that she was currently managing. She had mentioned over the telephone that she wanted to see some bus progress when she got back.

Carl reasoned that the easiest things that he could do to make it look different were to remove much of the inside and to paint the outside. His attentions had been drawn to the inside as it was cold outside and mains powered fan heaters had been warming the inside for almost a week.

He looked up when he heard a red van pulling onto his drive. It parked out of sight, in front of his house. A few moments later a bearded and rotund elderly man appeared around the corner of the house and boarded the bus. Always up for a distraction, Carl was happy to engage him in conversation. Before long they were sat in the kitchen of his house, consuming cups of tea and working their way through the cake that Carl had baked the previous afternoon for no particularly good reason.

The old man explained that he had spotted the top of the bus over the hedge when he had been driving down the lane. Thinking that his mates in the van would be able to lend a hand, he had pulled in. He proposed a deal where his mates would do some work on the bus in return for Carl taking it out to collect a few friends from around the country. He would then bring them to Scotland the following Wednesday lunchtime.

Carl was won over by the idea that the bus would effortlessly be roadworthy by the time that Sarah got home. The fact that all he would have to do in return for this massive leap forward in his project was play with his toy, by driving it about a bit, came as a bonus.

The old man reached into his pocket and drew out four pieces of paper. He explained that three of the sheets each detailed one of the individuals that Carl was to round up. The fourth sheet described the Scottish location where he would deliver his willing passengers, after a few days on the road.

It was important to the old man that the passengers be willing. To this end he took his gold rimmed spectacles off and gave them to Carl. He suggested that Carl wear the glasses when he was trying to talk the individuals into taking to the road with him. They would, he suggested, make him look more trustworthy.

Walking over to balance the mugs on the massive pile of crockery that he had been building on the draining board for several days, Carl noticed that it was dark outside. To him it felt like he had been chatting to the old man for no more than an hour. It had clearly been longer.

Showing his visitor out, they wandered over to the bus. It seemed to be the completed project. Carl