U F uh-O

By Lisa Mason

Knocked Up meets E.T.

Josh and Nikki really want a child but have infertility issues. Mike and Gretchen are a very different couple but have the same problem. When Nikki meets Gretchen at the Happy Daze Family Clinic in Pasadena, they discover that they share a love of music and have asked for a donor with musical talent. Nine months later, they give birth to very unusual babies and, seeking an answer to why the kids are so special, they meet again at a pediatrician’s office.

And the search is on: who—and what—is Donor Number 333?

Five stars! "A very humorous novella!"

Lisa Mason wrote U F uh-O as a screenplay for a producer looking for another Galaxy Quest or Men in Black, then rewrote the screenplay as a novella. She finds prose writing so much more fun than scriptwriting.

From the author of Summer of Love, A Time Travel (A Philip K. Dick Award Finalist and San Francisco Chronicle Recommended Book), The Gilded Age, A Time Travel (A New York Times Notable Book and New York Public Library Recommended Book), Celestial Girl (A Lily Modjeska Mystery), The Garden of Abracadabra, Volume 1 of the Abracadabra Series, and Strange Ladies: 7 Stories.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lisa Mason
• Release date: Aug 18, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301934072

Lisa Mason

Lisa Mason is the author of eleven novels, including Summer of Love (Bantam), a San Francisco Chronicle Recommended Book and Philip K. Dick Award finalist, and The Golden Nineties (Bantam), a New York Times Notable Book and New York Public Library Recommended Book.Her most recent speculative novel is CHROME.Mason published her first story, “Arachne,” in Omni and has since published short fiction in magazines and anthologies worldwide, including Omni, Full Spectrum, Universe, Year’s Best Fantasy and Horror, Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine, Unique, Transcendental Tales, Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, Immortal Unicorn, Tales of the Impossible, Desire Burn, Fantastic Alice, The Shimmering Door, Hayakawa Science Fiction Magazine, Unter Die Haut, and others. Her thirty-two stories and novelettes have been translated into Chinese, French, German, Italian, Japanese, Portuguese, Spanish, and Swedish.Mason’s story, “Tomorrow’s Child,” first published in Omni Magazine, is in active development at Universal Studios.Lisa Mason lives in the San Francisco Bay area with her husband, the renowned artist and jeweler Tom Robinson. Visit her on the web at Lisa Mason’s Official Website, follow her Official Blog, follow her on Twitter @lisaSmason, or e-mail her at [e-mail].

Book preview

U F uh-O

Lisa Mason

U F uh-O started out as a science fiction comedy screenplay for a producer looking for the next Galaxy Quest or Men In Black. Lisa Mason adapted the screenplay as a novella.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Bast Books

Copyright 2011 by Lisa Mason.

Cover collage 2016 and colophon copyright 2017 by Tom Robinson.

All rights reserved.

PUBLISHING HISTORY

Bast Books estory edition published April 2016.

Smashwords Edition

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting my hard work

For information address:

Bast Books

[e-mail]

Thank you for your readership! Please visit the author at her Official Web Site for all her books, ebooks, stories, screenplays, blogs, interviews, cute pet pictures, and more.

Lisa Mason

Table of Contents

Praise for Books by Lisa Mason

U F uh-O, A Sci Fi Comedy

About Lisa Mason

Books by Lisa Mason

Praise for Books by Lisa Mason

Summer of Love

A San Francisco Chronicle Recommended Book of the Year

A Philip K. Dick Award Finalist

Remarkable. . . .a whole array of beautifully portrayed characters along the spectrum from outright heroism to villainy. . . .not what you expected of a book with flowers in its hair. . . the intellect on display within these psychedelically packaged pages is clear-sighted, witty, and wise.

—Locus Magazine

A fine novel packed with vivid detail, colorful characters, and genuine insight.

—The Washington Post Book World

Captures the moment perfectly and offers a tantalizing glimpse of its wonderful and terrible consequences.

—The San Francisco Chronicle

Brilliantly crafted. . . .An engrossing tale spun round a very clever concept.

—Katharine Kerr, author of Days of Air and Darkness

"Just imagine The Terminator in love beads, set in the Haight-Ashbury ‘hood of 1967."

—Entertainment Weekly

Mason has an astonishing gift. Her characters almost walk off the page. And the story is as significant as anyone could wish. This book will surely be on the prize ballots.

—Analog

A priority purchase.

—Library Journal

The Gilded Age

A New York Times Notable Book

A New York Public Library Recommended Book

A winning mixture of intelligence and passion.

—The New York Times Book Review

Should both leave the reader wanting more and solidify Mason’s position as one of the most interesting writers in science fiction.

—Publishers Weekly

Rollicking. . .Dazzling. . .Mason’s characters are just as endearing as her world.

—Locus Magazine

Graceful prose. . . A complex and satisfying plot.

—Library Journal

One Day in the Life of Alexa

Incorporates lively prose, past/present time jumps, and the consequences of longevity technology. An absorbing read with an appealing narrator and subtly powerful emotional rhythms.

—Goodreads

Five Stars! Like all the truly great scifi writers, what [Lisa Mason] really writes about is you and me and today and what is really important in life. . . . I enjoyed every word.

—Reader Review

The Garden of Abracadabra

So refreshing! This is Stephanie Plum in the world of Harry Potter.

—Goodreads

Fun and enjoyable urban fantasy

This is a very entertaining novel—sort of a down-to-earth Harry Potter with a modern adult woman in the lead. Even as Abby has to deal with mundane concerns like college and running the apartment complex she works at, she is surrounded by supernatural elements and mysteries that she is more than capable of taking on. Although this book is just the first in a series, it ties up the first episode while still leaving some story threads for upcoming books. I'm looking forward to finding out more.

—Reader Review

I love the writing style and am hungry for more!

—Goodreads

Strange Ladies: 7 Stories

Offers everything you could possibly want, from more traditional science fiction and fantasy tropes to thought-provoking explorations of gender issues and pleasing postmodern humor…This is a must-read collection.

—The San Francisco Review of Books

Lisa Mason might just be the female Phillip K. Dick. Like Dick, Mason's stories are far more than just sci-fi tales, they are brimming with insight into human consciousness and the social condition….a sci-fi collection of excellent quality….you won't want to miss it.

—The Book Brothers Review Blog

Fantastic book of short stories….Recommended.

—Reader Review

"I’m quite impressed, not only by the writing, which gleams and sparkles, but also by [Lisa Mason’s] versatility . . . Mason is a wordsmith . . . her modern take on Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland is a hilarious gem! [This collection] sparkles, whirls, and fizzes. Mason is clearly a writer to follow!"

—Amazing Stories

Celestial Girl (A Lily Modjeska Mystery)

Passionate Historical Romantic Suspense

5 Stars! I really enjoyed the story and would love to read a sequel! I enjoy living in the 21st century, but this book made me want to visit the Victorian era. The characters were brought to life, a delight to read about. The tasteful sex scenes were very racy….Good Job!

—Reader Review

U F uh-O, A Sci Fi Comedy

1

Great Expectations

2

Great Deliveries

3

Great Babies

4

Great Serendipitous Meetings

5

Great Burglary

6

Great Interviews

7

Great Wild Goose Chase

8

Great Convention

9

Great Escape

10

Great Encounters of the Third Kind

11

Great Guest

12

Great Rehearsals

13

Great Contest

1

Great Expectations

Pasadena is a wood-burning oven, Josh a piece of meat, as he pulls his Volvo spattered with bumper stickers up to Happy Daze Family Clinic.

Nikki hops out and boogies over to the driver’s side, doing the trademarked bump-and-grind she used to do as the lead guitar of Chicks in Chains. Today she’s flower-child chic in skinny white jeans, a pink camisole, and suede ballet flats. Not rocker-chick sleek in black leather and sky-high boots like in the old days. But he can’t help but smile. Damn, she’s hot. He hasn’t seen his wife this stoked since they got married four years ago.

Now if only he could stifle the regret in his heart.

She leans in his window. She’s gonna be your kid, too, babe.

Or he. She could be a he.

Absolutely.

I hope I haven’t let you down, Nikki. You know I’m crazy in love with you.

I know, hubby of mine.