Tiny Earth Declares War on Earth

By JT Pearson

This is humor along the lines of The Hitchhikers Guide to the Universe. The president is coming into the Whitehouse after being elected and the Secretary of Defense tries to brief him about our microscopic nemesis and the building agression between the two planets. After the president realizes that he isn't being hazed his first day in office he needs a plan to defend earth. He instructs the Secretary of Defense to form a committee of short people to help him understand the agression that comes with being small. He also gets in contact with the most powerful sub-branch of the CIA, DC CARPET AND DRAPES, a cleaning company so deep under cover that sometimes they even forget that they are government agents and clean peoples home for months on end. If you like the other quirky stories I've published you'll like this one too.

• Language: English
• Publisher: JT Pearson
• Release date: Mar 1, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301748112

JT Pearson

JT Pearson is possibly more myth than reality. It is widely believed that he has been around for thousands of years. Archeological digs have uncovered Grecian artwork that suggests that they prayed to him to cure ailments of the feet. Irish legend insists that JT Pearson is that movement in shadow that you’re not certain that you actually saw, or that image at the edge of your peripheral vision that vanishes when you turn toward it. In the upper Midwest of the United States people had claimed that they had several images of JT Pearson captured on film but they were all poor quality and eventually proven to be hoaxes. It is only recently that an artist rendering was discovered in the attic of an old convent that is believed to be authentic. President Richard Nixon had claimed before his death that JT Pearson was the specter that haunted his boyhood home, and quite possibly the reason that his mother left his father for a short time. Nestled among all of these legends and hearsay is the accusation that he is the author of this sight and responsible for the drivel that has been filling your head. Lawyers for JT Pearson advise that if you read his work you do so at your own peril and no form of compensation either monetary or otherwise will be offered for any injuries permanent or short term which are incurred within the pages of his stories. If you’d like to communicate with JT Pearson either burn a photograph of yourself and sprinkle the ashes into the wind at dusk or you may take the more conventional route at [e-mail] P.S. look for novels coming in the near future. For now, please enjoy the many short stories that he has provided for you to read for free. Feedback is much appreciated.

Book preview

Tiny Earth Declares War on Earth

By J T Pearson

copyright Joseph Pearson 2013

Smashwords edition

Secretary of Defense, Lance Maynard, produced a cigar from his breast pocket and held it out. Do you mind, Mr. President? They’re kind of like a security blanket for me in times of stress.

Under the circumstances I think that we can overlook it. Go ahead, said the president, with a slight hint of a smile that he was struggling to conceal. He didn’t want to spoil the fun his staff was entitled while hazing him his first day in office. Maynard was a leftover from the departing administration that the new president, Winston Westmont Pierce, had decided to keep aboard.

Maynard produced his lighter, lit the cigar, and took a couple of puffs before proceeding.

The inhabitants of Tiny Earth don’t use bullets and bombs. They’ve developed the technology to manipulate some of Earth’s physical laws, like gravity and radio waves. They also claim that they are able to shrink whatever is in our atmosphere, reduce the mass, or compress it- we’re not real sure about what they mean - although that technology hasn’t actually been confirmed. To be clear, we aren’t really certain how much of a danger they are to our planet but they’ve exhibited a significant superiority to our scientific knowledge in the past, using it more as a warning, creating nuisance situations rather than actual harm so far.

Nuisance situations, mmm hmm. The president picked a sweet roll from his desk and rolled it around in his hand while he feigned a limited amount of distress. It wouldn’t look very presidential not to appear brave and manly. He posed with his shoulders back. I see. He tried not to look obvious as he scanned the office for hidden cameras. He inwardly chastised himself for looking too long and directly at a potted rubber tree that sat along the eastern wall.

"Only a couple dozen people in the world, dating back to 1973 when their King first contacted us, know of the existence of Tiny Earth. Since then, each president and whoever he had felt it was necessary to confide in, have been informed that Tiny Earth has been