Life's A Bitch And Then You Die II

By Steven Holt

A collection of award winning poems, limericks, personal sayings and "Absurd words" from top American free lance writer and multi-time author, Steven E. Holt. Including up to 70% new works, these poems range from the deepest of dark to the funniest of humor. Award winning poems from several of Steven's previous popular books are included: "Life's A Bitch, And Then You Die" (1985), "Blood, Sweat and Fears" (1996) and "And The Soul Also Bleeds" (2001.

Even the non-poet will find something in these verses for them. Topics range from the morose and macabre to the witty to the humorous. And, of course, limericks are a special case of rhyming gone awry, dating back centuries to even the highest of Nobility. Steve's personal sayings are sardonic, whimsical and oftentimes cynical but frequently either true or just funny.

"Absurd words" are just that- words that have had their meanings juxtaposed or twisted into the funniest version possible. Pure madcap humor!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Steven Holt
• Release date: Oct 31, 2012
• ISBN: 9781301859160

Steven Holt

Steven was born and raised in Los Altos, a suburb of San Jose, California in the now famous "Silicon Valley." He graduated from San Jose State University with a Master's degree equivalent and taught Special Education in college as an Adjunct Professor and also was a counselor at the California School for the Deaf as well as an Interpreter for the Deaf, wrestling coach and sports official. He currently lives in Fallbrook, California with his dog. He enjoys road racing motorcycles, herpetology and has written various books including children's and fiction. He is also one of the top free-lance writers in America. He has won several literary awards in poetry.

Book preview

SECTION I

Philosophy, Psychology, Fantasy, Inner Angst,

Depression, Religion, Death, Morose Topics

IF I WERE A CLOUD

I CAST MY SHADOW DEEP WITHIN THE ECSTASY OF GOD

I CRUMBLE HOPES OF A WARM SPRING NIGHT

I CHALLENGE WIND TO BLOW AND SUN TO NEVER SHINE

COMMANDING ALL WITHIN MY SIGHT

I RAIN UPON THE HEARTS OF LOVERS AS THEY WALK

I’VE SEEN A THOUSAND WINTERS DIE

I CALL YOU OUT TO SEE THE PATTERNS THAT I FORM

ACROSS THE EASEL OF MY SKY

I CALL UPON THE WIND TO SING HER BITTER SONG

AND FILL THE EARTH WITH FROZEN RAGE

I MESMERIZE YOUR DREAMS WITH THUNDER THAT YOU FEAR

I ACT UPON GOD’S OPEN STAGE

IN SUMMER’S HEAT YOU NEED ME MORE THAN I WILL KNOW

BUT I JUST TURN MY BACK AWAY

I LEAVE YOU ALL UPON THE SCORCHING MOUNDS OF DIRT

FOR MY RETURN YOU DEFTLY PRAY

I SEE ACROSS THE VOID OF ALL HUMANITY

YOU SEEK REPENTANCE FROM MY RAIN

AND IF I DON’T APPEAR ON TIME AS YOU REQUIRE

MY DROUGHT WILL PUNISH YOU IN PAIN

THE EARTH IS CRYING FOR THE POWER THAT I DEAL

OR THE SWEETNESS OF MY SERENADE

I AM THE FOG, THE RAIN, THE SNOW AND HURRICANES

I AM THE MASTER OF CHARADE

NON-METAMORPHOSIS

Blue brick mountains stand slightly discolored

Tempting existence while abiding their time

Silver-gray ribbons of concrete and asphalt

Wrap gently around like a serpentine vine

The ancient volcanoes have long since been silenced

As the clear morning sunlight continues to shine

The logic of nature entices omniscience

That soon gave way when developing Mankind

Drawn to perceptions of immobile concreteness

Such mountains deceive the noblest minds

These mountains endure the strictest involvement

Attempting no movement, remaining benign

But soon, over time, they will lessen with weakness

As perpetuity dissolves them in a victimless crime

History shapes and reshapes our involvement

If Mankind survives, He will witness these signs

THE SEA, THE WALL and ME

The clean, clear brine of my unhindered dreams

Exists for miles beyond my esteem

Emerald waves transgress a barren, sandy shore

Where their once crested pillars remain king, no more

As they gently lap at Earths’ unprotected feet

Assaulting creation, resisting defeat

This shoreline destruction entails such a sight

Where the poor rocks endure a losing ongoing fight

Cream white and pure is this weapon of foam

As it etches dimensions in its new found dirt home

In their act of ritualistic soft decay

These waves, like thieves, they steal Earth’s clay

Sculptured rock statues lie broken and bleeding

While the ocean’s wet carvers cut away so unheeding

Pockmarked walls of Nature’s denial

Await such injustice from a lifelong death trial

O’ Waves, I watch you come and steal away

Throughout the night, into the day

As I witness this ungodly crime

And echo in your battered time

Your disarray of scheduled force

Has left its mark within Life’s course

By sight and sound of artistic showing

The tide has ebbed, the waters flowing

Across the sand, so dry and parched

You wet the crystals, soon pressed and starched

I envision my life is like this clay

Yet again I see you steal away

A small but potent piece of me

And return that piece unto the sea

FIREFLY

In the darkness of the night

Where silent, shadows fool my sight

I behold an angel’s image dancing brightly!

As I quickly catch a glance

But there remains no fleeting chance

For she is much too fast for me to capture tightly

Is this a dream that I do see

As it floats softly through the trees

A blazing ember cast beyond my mortal touch

I’m enraptured by this sight

So far away but yet so bright

Do I dare to dream of her within my clutch

So my intentions are still pure

But I am curious, for sure

As to why I’ve never seen this thing before

I’ve heard the stories and the wit

About the fairies how they flit

But it has always seemed a bit like country lore

It’s with a sadness now I know

That with the morning sun she’ll go

To continue on her brief and passing way

In my loneliness I cry

For with the sunshine she will die

With the changing of the night into the day

Is there no way to save her soul?

She’s like a boulder that must roll

As she dodges quickly down the mountain where I stand

She doesn’t know that she’s in peril

Because her world has been so feral

And no human has yet to catch her in his hand

Let it be I who does the deed

Perhaps I’m challenged by my greed

For if I bring her back alive I’ll have my fame

But as I think of my morass

To see her shining under glass

Then it is I who surely must endure such shame

BEWILDERMENT

Once upon a dark, gray night

A million eyes were staring

I couldn’t see their faces

Nor the smiles they were wearing

I felt so unafraid it seemed

That I was only dreaming

So little did I think upon

The motives they were scheming

In solitude I lay alone

And imagined shadows creeping

But those visions of reality

Were merely symptoms of my sleeping

The deepest slumber stole my mind

Into its depths I wandered

Figments of my own devise

Their origins I have pondered

Soon the sunlight of the dawn

Did cast itself on me

Those surrealistic faces seen

Were just a fantasy

But was I really dreaming

Only passing time would tell

So I decided to awake myself

And break this hazy spell

But as my dream stopped spinning

I looked around to see

A million other dreamers

All staring back at me!

SATIETY

Do you want t be a hero?

Would you like to be a star?

Even though it doesn’t matter

Just how ugly you are?

Do you wish to be famous

Have your fortune for free?

Leave your scruples behind you

And forget destiny.

Do your friendships seem tarnished?

Filled with false empathy?

Do your daydreams defeat you

In your warped fantasy?

Would you like to ride a starship

To the end of the sky?

Do you want to live forever

Never having to die?

Have you looked upon a villain

In your mirror at home

Did you ever feel forsaken

Out on the streets that you roam?

Would you cheat just for profit?

Or just to please all your friends

Is your nightmare beginning

When you thought it would end?

Is your life