The (Not Yet) Complete Works

By Heater Case

An agglomeration from twenty years of word salad. Some are true. Some aren't. Some are funny. Some aren't. I think agglomeration is the biggest word I've ever used. Live and learn. Carpe diem. Wang Chung. Rinse. Repeat.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Heater Case
• Release date: Sep 30, 2012
• ISBN: 9781301925056

Heater Case

Heater Case has been a writer, musician, and artist since elementary school. He's lived extensively in New York City and Boston, with shorter incarnations in Chicago and Los Angeles. He roots for the underdog because underdogs need good pep talks and that requires being positive and unselfish. He also likes turkey burgers with Eggo waffles instead of buns. That about sums it up.

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The (not yet) Complete Works

By Heater Case

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2020 Heater Case

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

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Table of Contents

Introduction

A Love Letter To My Car

Man Of Means By No Means

What I Learned In High School

Never Forgetting

To France, With My Apologies

In The Dark

My Back, My Monkey

Some Fear, No Loathing

Ink Of Passion

Park Your Grok

Don’t Happy, Be Worry

Agnus Dei

Broken String

Underbelly Of A Cruise Ship

Far From The Tree

One More For The Road

*****

Introduction

Yeah, Forrest Gump had a lot of homespun chestnuts but, then again, he spent the whole movie waiting for a bus when his girlfriend’s house was just around the corner and up the street.

Consider this a box of chocolates from me to you and I have no idea who lives around the corner and up the street. I guess I share your burden, Forrest.

This is a hodgepodge of pieces I did for many different periodicals, platforms and projects over a twenty year span. Some of these stories take place long before that. Some started as notes on a scratchpad on the passenger seat when I drove around North America for three years and spent a good deal of that time living in my car. Some of these take place in an alternate reality and some are very real. Some of these are funny and some of them aren’t.

But, hey, you never know what you’re going to get.

*****

A Love Letter To My Car

A man once said, I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride.

Another man once said, Sometimes I sit up at night and wonder how I ever got this far, but I guess I'll always pull out from under 'long as I got a car and guitar.

Okay, I was the second guy, but take a good look at your car. It's metal and rubber and plastic and glass. It's perfect, except for the human factor. That's why we make agreements amongst ourselves. We all stay on the same side of the road. We all stop and go at the same colored light.

There are also agreements we make within ourselves. Those are the agreements we break the most because we don't think there's anybody to call us on them. 'Character is who you are in the dark' are the immortal words uttered by Dr. Emilio Lizardo in the motion picture The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The Eighth Dimension. It is the only movie of which I own a copy and the only movie I've ever tried to fashion my life after.

Character being what you are in the dark is probably one of the most significant self-awareness tools I have ever come across. Every affect you have worked so hard to perfect is useless in the dark. There is no room for poseurs and wannabes. There are no coattails to grab and no rear ends to kiss. It's just you, baby, and the door out could be eight miles away or two inches behind you. That's why getting there is half the fun.

That's why a car is more than just metal and rubber and plastic and glass. It's a means to get somewhere or a means to get away. A car is a container for our hopes and dreams or a trash can for our failures.

A car is a conveyance to a better place, a Promised Land. A car is a church… and traffic is a Holy War.

*****

A Man Of Means, By No Means

Everything I need to know I learned in motel rooms. Well, not everything, but here’s a few travel tips I’ve devised.

Scully, Take A Look At This

If you've been living in a biosphere for the last decade or don't have the Discovery Channel, you might be the last person on Earth who thinks hotel bedspreads are clean. I'm sure there's a very nice hotel somewhere that has a special room where elves weave brand new bed spreads from untouched fabric for each and every guest five minutes before they arrive. Until I confirm the existence of such a place, take the bedspread and chuck it onto the closet floor, into the bottom drawer or unto whatever farthest off corner you shall not be negotiating.

I also like to wipe down the phone and the remote with that hand cleaner stuff that everybody and their uncle has these days. No, I'm not Howard Hughes. I just don't want to be a motel while staying at a motel.

Natural Fibers! Cotton! Wool! Linen! Muslin!

Not only can you roll your clothes into tight packages like your Uncle in the Navy showed you, but I’d be hard pressed to find a wrinkle that don’t come out when you hang your clothes in a steamy bathroom. Shake them out afterward and you should be fine.

Hey! How Can I Hang My Clothes In The Bathroom When Those Useless Motel Hangers Can Only Be Used In The Closet, Huh?

Okay, listen up. Those hanger tops that stay connected to the bar can be had. Google closed-loop hangers and explore the sites until you find a place where you don't