The Accident at 13th and Jefferson

By Brenda Carlton

Josh Greenwood and his Mom and Dad are walking their neighbors to the corner of 13th and Jefferson after Josh’s 14th birthday party when a careening motorcycle kicks up a rock that kills Bonnie, the mother. But what if the rock killed Tom, the father, instead? Or the accident unfolded differently and Josh was killed? This uplifting tale of middle class family life in America offers all three stories.

In Book 1, Tom struggles to cope with single parenthood and tries to woo Elaine, the neighbor at the accident who has a past with a mystery man. Josh and Max, Elaine’s son who doesn’t know that his real father is “somebody”, interfere and grow up until graduation from high school.

In Book 2, Bonnie struggles to save Josh from the influences of her petty criminal half-brother, Mitch. Max reacts very differently to learning the identity of his real father and even with the best intentions and efforts of loving mothers things do not turn out well.

In Book 3, Tom and Bonnie’s marriage flounders as they struggle to reinvent themselves as non-parents, Max becomes a real player in his father’s presidential campaign and Elaine... Well we can’t tell you the rest.

In Book 4, (surprise!) the original tragedy is averted. How much do we really know about anyone?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Brenda Carlton
• Release date: Sep 25, 2012
• ISBN: 9781301347162

Brenda Carlton

Brenda J. Carlton is a Grammy with an itch to finally express herself. She loves gardening, painting, science and studying people. What is a jack of all trades with a lifetime of stored up sly observations to do except write? She also paints her own book covers.

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Prologue

Miles below the surface of a very young planet, much later to be called Earth, chemistry and physics were at work although there were no humans to put their own names on these processes. Silica, aluminum, oxygen, and curious metals slowly became the little rock of our story, a tiny bit of granite in a formation the size of a small continent. The seas formed and gave birth to life, which spread onto the land and produced great reptiles. The great reptiles vanished, life found new forms and meanwhile the little rock of our story moved for hundreds of thousands of millennia with the shifting, sliding and buckling of the earth’s layers. The rock emerged into the elements for the first time in towering mountains later, after they were worn down to a speck of their former glory, to be called the Poconos. Ice ages later a glacier snapped our little rock from its birthplace, drove it a couple of hundred miles south and left it under twelve feet of rubble.

By the time the Roman Empire fell, countless storms had washed it into a stream, where a human of the Lenni Lenape tribe found it. He used it to build a fire-ring in which he roasted a whitetail deer for his family. It lay by the remains of the fire, eventually beneath two feet of dirt, until the last of his great-great grandchildren had grandchildren.

An oxen-pulled plow churned the rock up in a farmer’s field toward the end of the time when Pennsylvania was considered by certain humans to be part of England. It spent almost two hundred years in the wall of a stone barn and then another seventy years in one of the rock piles that became less and less recognizable as the remains of the collapsed barn.

Then one day in the third century of the existence of a nation named the United States of America, a man called Dwayne loaded cast off furniture into the back of his pickup truck. His wife would finally stop nagging, he hoped, if he delivered it to Goodwill. It was one of the hot gusty summer days that usually meant a thunderstorm was on the way. He tied a plastic drop cloth from his last paint job over the load and set off. He heard an odd puffing sound and looked into his rear view mirror. The wind was catching under the drop cloth and making it billow up as high as the roof of his cab. Looks like some kind of goddamn demented mushroom, with them colors and all, he said, aloud. He pulled over and lit a cigarette and studied the situation.

He knew he ought to retie the ropes better, but his buddies were already waiting at the bar. Sloppy job, this was. He noticed a mound of stones on the other side of the road and trotted across. He gathered an armful, took them back to the truck, and dropped them into the valley between a dresser mirror and a rocking chair to weigh down the drop cloth. He looked at the bed of the truck, and then at the rocks across the road. He spotted the rock of our story, which sparkled more than the others in the late afternoon sun. It was about as long as a small chicken egg, but the collapse of the barn had split it lengthwise leaving a pickax-shape useful for Dwayne’s purpose. Dwayne used it as a knife to poke some air holes here and there in the drop cloth and then tossed it toward a hill in his load where it slid down the drop cloth into the valley with the others.

Dwayne’s quick fix held the drop cloth down until he got into town and to Thirteenth Avenue and Jefferson Street. Someone living in the house on the corner must be having a party, he thought. There were blue balloons tied to the mailbox and the uprights by the front door. A forty-mile-an-hour wind gust met him as he turned the corner. The demented mushroom appeared again in his back window. The rocks clattered behind him in the street. Damn it. Goodwill was only six blocks away, so he decided not to stop.

-***-*-***-

BOOK 1

IF YOU TRY SOMETIMES, YOU JUST MIGHT FIND…

Chapter 1.1

Behind the house with the blue balloons, Tom Greenwood was starting to grill the steaks for his son’s fourteenth birthday party. The party consisted of seven boys having chicken fights in the above ground pool, chasing each other around the yard, calling each other names, and eating anything and everything his wife Bonnie and her friend Elaine could find to dump in a basket and bring out to the table. Tom had promised Bonnie that he would do all the cooking for this party since she had to tend bar later that night and also because it put him closer to the center of the kids’ attention. But Tom didn’t plan for the mountain of food the boys would devour before he got the real meal finished. The ladies always seemed to make him feel foolish about such things, smiling kindly at him as they took care of whatever he messed up.

Josh came out of the pool, shaking the water out of his light brown hair and sprinkling his father in the process. Will you take me to the video game store tonight after the party, Pop? he asked. Josh relished these occasional days when his father partook of family life.

You can wait a day, can’t you, before you spend your money? said Tom, flipping a steak.

School starts soon, Dad. Time’s a wastin’. I could play all day tomorrow, Josh said, twisting his face into that pleading little boy expression that always worked on Dad, but never on Mom.

No, and that’s my final answer, said Tom. Josh was surprised but he didn’t complain. He was having too good a day to argue.

Tom’s menu included baked beans from the deli and a huge green salad that looked like a lot of work but was really two large containers of toppings from the salad bar at the supermarket dumped on top of bagged lettuce. He did prepare homemade potato salad from scratch early this morning because Josh had specifically asked for it, or more precisely, because Bonnie snapped at him last night when he came home with supermarket potato salad. He didn’t use the family recipe that Josh requested. In Tom’s opinion adding expensive deli olives and roasted red peppers to the potato salad was a big improvement which also demonstrated that he couldn’t be completely bossed around. Bonnie, he said in her general direction. Bring out the salads, will you? They can eat them before the steaks are done. He was getting more and more embarrassed by the ladies’ frantic efforts to feed the kids.

Good idea, Bonnie said. Elaine nodded in relief. They brought the salads out and the kids tore into the food.

Josh’s best friend Max, temporarily sated, came over and said, Mr. Greenwood, would it be all right if we got the volleyball net out of your garage?

Sure, Max. Help yourself, Tom said. Max was Elaine’s son, the same age as Josh. Max and Elaine were their catty-corner across the street neighbors in an old residential neighborhood where the streets ran in nice logical straight lines unlike the self-conscious new developments where Tom installed wallboard. Max was the only one of Josh’s friends that called him Mr. Greenwood, even though he had known him far longer than any of the others. Some of the kids called him Tom, which he didn’t mind. But most of them talked to him as if he didn’t have a name, which he did mind.

Max and Josh had one important thing in common besides having gone to school together since they were four. They loved to play baseball. Tom played football when he was in school and he used to think that nothing else really counted as a sport, but now with Josh and Max in the game he was a big fan.

The boys got the net set up and a volleyball game started just as Tom finished the steaks. So the steaks cooled until the first game was finished, but at least that gave the adults some time to relax, so Tom didn’t complain.

They sat in plastic chairs by the pool, and Bonnie passed around some grown-up punch. Elaine said, Is Josh disappointed about being in the middle school for another year, now that they’ve taken 9th grade out of the high school?

When did they decide that? said Tom. Maybe he didn’t pay enough attention to such things, but Bonnie could have told him.

About a month ago, said Bonnie. Josh thinks it will be cool to be in the oldest grade in the school twice. I think he was fairly intimidated about going to the high school anyway, although he wouldn’t admit it. She addressed her answer more to Tom than to Elaine. She consistently gave Tom’s clues about Josh in ways that never implied he should already know these things.

Tom said, That does sound like fun. Bonnie gave him an approving smile.

Max is disappointed. He wanted to get into some of the science labs at the high school, said Elaine. She took a sip of her punch and looked disappointed as well.

Is he in all honor classes again? said Bonnie.

Yes. We’re hoping for some college scholarships by the time he finishes. He’s a hard worker, said Elaine.

He’s just a kid. He needs to have some fun, said Tom.

He does have fun. said Elaine.

Did I tell you that Janet gave her notice? said Elaine, to change the subject. Janet was a young woman at Webster’s Gardens, the nursery that Elaine owned, who had been missing a lot of work lately. I don’t know how I’m going to get everything done until I can replace her, Elaine said.

Didn’t you say that she was thrilled to get this job? What happened? said Bonnie.

She found out she’s pregnant. I think her parents are going to raise the baby, and they insisted she quit, said Elaine. Moving shrubbery and small trees around all day is tough work. Elaine was sympathetic, but she was also short on help.

Maybe she should’ve thought about getting married before she had a baby, said Tom. Just an idea. You know… Tom switched into a singsong theatre voice. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Susie in the baby carriage.

He laughed his big booming laugh, and waited for his audience to respond.

Bonnie gave him a dirty look. She didn’t find Tom’s performances as funny in recent years.

Elaine said, Hey, watch it. I was never married either.

Tom recomposed his face, disappointed because he didn’t get a laugh, and said, Really? I always thought you must be a widow. His attention wandered to the volleyball game. Josh got a good dig and Max tried for a spike but missed completely.

Bonnie said, Honestly Tom. How long have we known Elaine?

So shoot me, said Tom, dutifully returning his attention to the ladies, although he had to miss the next point in the volleyball game. I didn’t know. I’m sorry if I offended you Elaine.

It’s OK, said Elaine.

Max has never talked about a father, said Tom.

No. Max has never met him, said Elaine.

Tom didn’t understand why but he didn’t ask because Bonnie’s mother, Juliet, appeared with Marvin and Mitch just in time to eat. Bonnie ran to show her family to the chairs she already had set up for them. Tom got busy with a batch of chicken wings at the grill and waved in their general direction.

Tom tried hard to find something to like in everyone but he had to admit that Bonnie’s family was not a lot of fun. Juliet was OK. She was just an older lady who hadn’t had an easy life. Tom flirted with her a little now and then and that was all it took to get along with her. Trying to talk to her latest husband Marvin was a problem. An occasional grunt and a scowl were about all Tom could ever get out of him.

The young guy, Mitch, was Bonnie’s half-brother. He was Juliet’s son by some guy or another between Bonnie’s father and Marvin, and he was bad news. Sometimes guys can tell things about other guys that you can’t explain to the women. Mitch always put Tom into a state of high alert, as though an unspecified but hair-raising danger was lurking in the bushes.

Elaine rounded up the boys and got busy filling plates and pouring drinks. Tom watched Bonnie sitting under the maple tree with her crew for a little while, but by the time he finished helping Elaine making sure all the kids had enough food and went over to mingle they were leaving. He was probably in some kind of trouble. Juliet got her feelings hurt really easily and Bonnie would never hear the end of it.

Josh took his place in a plastic chair by the table on the pool deck for the gift opening ceremony. The first present was from Mom and Dad. It was an expensive fly-fishing outfit. Thank you, Mom, he said. He jumped up and ran over to her chair and planted a loud smoochy kiss on her cheek. Bonnie was a fisherman who was always hoping to get her son more interested in her sport. Josh was beginning to get good at it, mostly because it pleased his mother so much. Bonnie beamed at him, and said, You’re more than welcome, honey. You’re my favorite fishing buddy.

Josh remembered that Dad’s name was also on the tag, and gave him a hug too. It occurred to him that the other kids might think this was dorky, but he really didn’t care. The next present he picked up was from Matt, the total jock, and Ross, the emerging psychopath. The boys all had labels like that for each other. Josh was surprised that Matt and Ross went together on a present since that meant that some agreement must have been reached and executed, an amazing feat for that pair.

Ta daaa, and the surprise is… he boomed, showing off the new deepness in his voice. He ripped the paper and found a brightly painted blue and yellow birdhouse. He held it and examined it from all angles. A birdhouse, he announced in his stage voice, and then he repeated in a small, confused voice, a birdhouse? Why did you get me a birdhouse?

My sister makes them to sell. She needed the business, said Ross. Josh noticed his father laughing with the kids while his mother tried hard not to. Aunt Elaine was shaking her head.

OK, let’s try again, said Josh. He closed his eyes and reached for another gift from the pile. And for your edification and entertainment ladies and gentlemen, he announced, we now have, drum roll please… Josh opened the present and found a never-opened calendar from two years ago, with pictures of New England lighthouses.

The kids, anxiously waiting, all cracked up. OK. I sense a theme here. Let’s see what the rest of you did to me, said Josh.

Manmohan gave him a book on how to plan his wedding. Lee gave him a Santa Claus costume.

Max gave him a set of lavender scented bath products. Hey I might actually use these, said Josh. Look in the bag again, said Aunt Elaine. In the bottom of the same gift bag, he found a very good catcher’s mitt. He was stunned. He had occasionally substituted for the catcher last year and he really wanted to try out for the position this year. Wow.

Aunt E. You are so cool. Mucho gracias, Josh said. She smiled happily at his reaction.

The adults went in the house to start a first round of cleanup and the boys were all hanging around the patio table waiting for the requisite half hour after a meal to pass so they could go back in the pool. Josh was surprised when Max said, apropos of nothing else in the conversation, I wish my mom would take me fishing.

Yeah, your mom is cool, said Lee. All my mom ever does is work and shop. She’d probably scream if she saw a worm.

You’d probably scream if you saw a worm too, said Ross.

Lee pushed Ross into the pool for that. Then Alan pushed Lee in, splashing Matthew’s backpack, which meant Matt had to throw his wet backpack at Alan. Josh had to chase Matt around the yard. Matt led Josh right back to the pool, and jumped in, and then Josh and Max jumped in on top of him.

When Tom came out of the house to see what the commotion was, all of the boys were wrestling in the pool. Several of the boys looked worried that they were all about to get into trouble. They didn’t need to worry. Tom wanted to play too. Tom did a cannonball, fully dressed, wallet and keys notwithstanding, into the water between Max and Josh sending a geyser of water all over the boys and much of the deck.

Bonnie and Elaine came out of the house. Some boys never grow up, Bonnie said, trying to look disapproving.

And some people don’t know how to have fun, said Tom.

And some of us have to get going, said Elaine. Come on, Max. I need to get to the nursery before it closes tonight.

Yeah, I’m coming, said Max.

Tom hauled himself out of the pool and then offered a hand to Max. He was pulling Max out of the pool when he slipped on the water he had just slopped onto the deck. Tom dropped Max back into the water and tried to direct his fall onto a raft lying nearby. A sharp pain in his left ankle made him yelp, and his landing on the raft turned out to be much more clumsy than comical.

The boys were startled, but only until Josh said, Way to go, Pop, and began to laugh.

Bonnie said, Are you OK? Tom’s ankle was already beginning to swell and turn color. Seriously, Tom. That looks serious, said Bonnie. Let me look at it.

I’m fine. It’s just a twisted ankle, said Tom. It really hurt but he didn’t want to look like a fool in front of the kids.

No one had noticed Elaine leave, but she returned with a bag of frozen corn. Put this on. It shapes itself around your ankle better than ice packs, she said.

Max went into the house to change. When he returned Tom said, Josh, go get me an ace bandage, will you? Elaine, hold on a minute, let me walk you guys out.

Elaine was annoyed by the delay, but she didn’t say anything. Josh returned with the bandage and Tom quickly wrapped his ankle. He tried putting some weight on it and it seemed sturdy enough. He took a step and it pained more than he cared to let on. He grabbed one of the baseball bats propped against the fence and made a show of using it as a cane.

Come on, Josh, your guests are leaving, Bonnie said. Josh followed her pretending to catch with his new glove.

Elaine was struggling with two bags of leftover food from the party. Would you guys carry these for me? she said. Josh put the glove down and he and Max each took a bag.

The group made their way through the gate and toward the corner. Tom limped more than a little, and the women talked too quietly for him to hear. A wind gust tore the balloons from the front stoop. The blue balloons skittered across the front lawn toward the street. Tom stopped for a minute to block their path and pick them up. Then he tried to catch up to the group wincing from the pain in his ankle. He noticed a Dodge pickup truck with a rusted tailgate partway down Jefferson Street with a multicolored tarp billowing and flapping in the wind behind it.

Did you enjoy your birthday, honey? said Bonnie, when the group reached the corner with Tom bringing up the rear.

Way cool. Thanks, Mom, said Josh. Thanks again for the glove, Aunt E, he said, remembering his manners and turning around.

You’re welcome, Josh, she said, smiling. She took the grocery bag from him to carry it across the street.

Happy Birthday, Josh, said Max.

Max made a move to cross the street, and then decided to wait for a motorcycle to go by first. The biker leaned way over rounding the corner too fast and nearly caught his exhaust pipe on the asphalt. Everyone watched, fascinated, as he skidded almost out of control when he hit the group of stones that had just flown out of Dwayne’s truck, now oddly lying in the street. Our small rock shot out from under the rear tire and seemed to fly straight for Bonnie’s face. She instinctively put her arms up to shield her face and Tom tried to jump into position to either shield her or shove her out of the path of the projectile, but due to his bad ankle he could not reach her in time.

She screamed as the sharp end of the rock sliced deep into the side of her neck. Blood immediately started pumping from her neck in a rhythmic fashion that Tom, shocked as he was, knew was catastrophic. She tried to tell him something and couldn’t and sank to a wobbly sitting position trying to hold in the blood squirting between her fingers.

Tom saw that neither Josh nor Max, because they were standing on the other side of him, had a line of sight to the terrifying wound. The kids did not need to have that gory picture in their memories, so he grabbed his son’s arms and turned him away from his mother. Potato salad and pretzels flew everywhere. What’s happening? said Josh, squirming in his father’s grip, frantic and angry at not knowing. Tom’s fingers were bruising his arms.

Your mom is hurt. I’m going to take care of her. Go back. Hurry. he said, looking over his shoulder at the same time. Bonnie was slumped over on her side, already unconscious.

Tom gave Josh a shove toward Elaine, who was already calling 911. Get the kids out of here, he barked and then was on the sidewalk without waiting for a response, kneeling in a growing puddle of warm fragrant blood, searching with his fingers for the ends of a vein in the wound. Bonnie was getting cold.

Don’t look back, he yelled over his shoulder as Elaine shoved the boys along back toward the house and talked on the cell phone at the same time.

Hold on honey. Hold on, said Tom, pinching what he hoped was a vein with one hand and stroking Bonnie’s hair with the other. His wife lay motionless on the sidewalk, eyes closed, unable to respond. He wasn’t sure if she could hear him, but he said many times, I love you Bonnie. Please don’t go.

When the ambulance crew took over Bonnie was still alive. In Tom’s experience emergency people usually spent a long time working on someone before they were satisfied that it was safe to transport them to the hospital but these people acted like they couldn’t get Bonnie moved fast enough, which scared the hell out of him. In the ambulance he could see that they were upset about whatever the monitor was telling them about her heart.

At the hospital they took her directly to surgery.

Tom waited and paced. Elaine called several times, but no, he didn’t know anything. She was still trying to get all the kids turned over to their parents and Josh was frantic. He waited and paced some more. He had to go to the bathroom, but he was afraid to leave the waiting room. He tried not to notice the drying blood on his knees.

Finally, about an hour and a half later, a grizzled doctor came out wearing green scrubs smeared with blood across his right shoulder.

Tom jumped up from the bench where he had done nothing but fidget anyway and said, How is my wife?

Please sit down, the doctor said. He sat down next to Tom and put his hand on Tom’s knee. He waited for Tom to focus and then said, I’m sorry. We lost her. She went into cardiac arrest three times, and the last time we couldn’t pull her out.

Tom stared for a minute. That can’t be right, he said. She’s a fine healthy lady. She can’t just die. Are you sure?

It didn’t make sense. There had to be a mistake.

He sank back onto the bench, twisting his bad ankle intentionally and welcoming the pain as something he could understand.

I’m sorry, said the doctor again. Too much blood loss. Can I send someone out to be with you until you collect yourself?

What do I do? said Tom. He didn’t want the doctor to leave. The doctor was his last connection to Bonnie. The last person to see her alive. Letting him leave was letting Bonnie be dead.

Excuse me. I don’t understand what you mean, said the doctor. Tom knew he had introduced himself but he couldn’t remember the name.

Do I take her home? said Tom.

Oh. You call the funeral home and they arrange to collect the body from the hospital morgue.

Did she suffer? Tom asked. His mind had already wandered before the doctor answered the question.

No. She was anesthetized.

We have a fourteen year old boy, said Tom. Surely she couldn’t be dead if he explained that she was still somebody’s mother.

Who is with your son now? said the doctor.

That brought Tom back to his senses. My wife’s best friend, Elaine, he said.

Maybe you should call her. Elaine can give him some mother-lovin’ for the initial shock.

OK, said Tom. The doctor rose from the sticky green plastic and stuck out his hand. Tom shook it and the doctor patted him on the arm and said, Good luck, and then he was gone.

Chapter 1.2

Josh and his father went to Bonnie’s grave the weekend after the funeral to spend some time with her, more privately.

Josh sat cross-legged on the fresh grave, and his Dad stood in his ex-army at ease position next to him. It was a beautiful early September day with a hint of fall in the air. Neither of them spoke for a while. Josh cried quietly a few times.

He talked to his Mom silently. Why did you have to leave us? I can’t stand how much I miss you. Moms are the people who help you with bad feelings, so what are you supposed to do when they are the ones who go? He couldn’t imagine ever feeling good again.

Tom wiped his eyes a couple of times too. Josh was too miserable to notice.

Tom wouldn’t have come here at all, but Josh begged and pleaded so he agreed to bring him. Tom didn’t believe in wallowing in bad feelings himself but he missed Bonnie so much that it wasn’t that hard for Josh to talk him into a visit.

Finally Josh said to his father, I never thought anything like this could happen to us.

Me neither, said Tom.

Dad, what are we going to do?

Do about what exactly? said Tom.

I mean who’s going to buy us clothes and make sure we go to the dentist?

Oh. I guess I’m going to have to do all that. We’re going to be fine, you know. It’s just going to take some getting used to, said Tom.

I hope so, said Josh. He really didn’t think his father was up to the job, but what was the point in saying so?

I’ve only been a single parent for a little more than a week, thought Tom, and I’ve already lied to the kid. He knew that they were not going to be just fine. He couldn’t afford to stay in the house without Bonnie’s income. He’d either have to get a second job, which would leave him no time to take care of Josh, or they’d have to move to an apartment. He could make up the difference for about six months from savings and by selling Bonnie’s car, and his two current fixer-upper Mustangs, if he could find time to get the work on them done. He just couldn’t bring himself to tell Josh.

Josh began to cry in earnest. Tom couldn’t decide what to do for a minute. He wanted to tell him something that would make him stop crying, but then thought that Josh probably needed to cry, so Tom didn’t do anything. After Josh cried for a while Tom said, Your Mom was a fine lady. We were lucky to have her.

Josh didn’t know how to respond to that but it was nice to think about something positive. His tears slowed and he wiped his runny nose on his shirtsleeve.

Hey Dad? Your first lesson in being a Mom? You need to carry tissues with you.

Tom grinned. I guess I’m going to need a purse, huh?

Josh produced a weak smile. Maybe a backpack.

Bye, Mom, he said to the grave marker. I’ll be back soon.

Bye Bonnie, said Tom. He felt silly but it seemed right to do as Josh did.

Do you want to help me get the ’76 Cobra ready to paint? Tom asked as they were walking through the cemetery back to the car.

OK. But I have to go back to school on Monday. I’m already three days behind, said Josh.

Right, said Tom. Do you feel better?

Yeah, I do. A little bit, said Josh.

Me too, said Tom. Maybe we should do this again.

Elaine was taking advantage of a few hours of free time on a cloudy early November day to deadhead the rose bushes in the elaborate landscaping around her patio. She overheard Max and Josh talking at the patio table where Max was supposed to be helping Josh with algebra.

He made me quit the soccer team, Josh said. It sucks.

How come? said Max. He was always into you being in sports before.

I was supposed to take the sports bus home ‘cause Mom can’t pick me up anymore, but I missed it and he was mad because he had to leave work early to come get me.

Well, why don’t you just promise him that you’ll never miss it again? Act real, real sorry, said Max.

I did, and then I missed it again. We were all hanging out after practice talking about Ross’s new house and I forgot.

Max laughed. Yeah. You did do it to yourself.

Josh, honey, said Elaine sticking her head around a dwarf spruce that was a focal point in a sea of thyme and rosemary, I couldn’t help overhearing. I would be happy to bring you home when I pick Max up. All you have to do is ask. I’ll do anything I can to help out.

Oh God, Aunt E. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I hoped you would say that. Josh looked so relieved that Elaine thought he would cry. I would be so grateful. Dad is really bad at the parenthood stuff. Mom always did it. He helped some, but only if it was no trouble. Jeez, I miss her.

Elaine took off her leather gloves, laid her pruning shears on the table and took a seat with the boys. I know you do, she said. I’m sure your father does too. Try to cut him a break. He needs time to get used to the way things are now.

I can’t imagine if you died, said Max. I only have one parent.

She was tempted to get into a discussion about him only having one parent. He was so used to the situation that the subject never came up, but she was going to have to tell him something, someday. He did have a father who was still living but she’d promised, signed a legal contract actually, that she would never tell anyone including Max who he was. Even his birth certificate said unknown. In exchange for that promise she received a considerable amount of child support every month, always paid exactly on time through a law office. Now that she was older and Max was not an accidental pregnancy, but a young man, it seemed that making such a promise was a dumb thing to do.

I’m not planning on dying anytime soon, said Elaine.

I don’t think Aunt Bonnie was either, said Max. He looked genuinely worried. Elaine wasn’t sure how to reassure him. She thought for a minute and then said, Accidents like that are rare.

Max seemed to be satisfied with that answer.

Aunt Elaine, can I ask you for another favor? said Josh. He looked so vulnerable.

I guess that depends on what it is, she answered.

Do you know Dr. Lowan? He’s the principal at Maple Valley Middle School.

I’ve never met him in person. I heard him speak at different events.

Right. Well I never met him in person either. But he’s called and left a message on the answering machine several times. He wants to have a meeting with Dad, but Dad never calls him back. Can you ask Dad to call him?

What do you think he wants? said Elaine. She imagined it had something to do with Josh’s performance or lack thereof at school.

I don’t know. I didn’t do anything bad. I think it has something to do with Mom dying, and seeing if we’re getting along OK without her. He has that kind of reputation. I think Dad is just insulted. You know. Who is he to try to supervise us?

So why do you want your Dad to go see him?

Cause, the school will think I’m a loser if he won’t go.

Fair point, said Elaine. I’m sorry Josh, but I don’t think it’s my place to butt in.

Aw, Pleeeeze, Aunt Elaine? Josh whined, putting on those brown puppy dog eyes that parents know so well. Pleeeeeze? Elaine decided that she was going to be dedicating a lot of time over the next few months, if not years, to mothering this poor motherless boy.

All right, but your Dad won’t listen to him anyway. You know, you are welcome to hang out here as much as you want. I know your Dad has to work a lot, and Bonnie always used to be home in the afternoons. We’d be happy to have you.

Thank you. I’d like that. The house seems so empty without Mom.

It will get better with time honey. It will never completely go away, but it will get better with time.

I don’t think so, Aunt E. I can’t imagine ever feeling happy again.

That’s ‘cause you’re young. You haven’t ever experienced grief before. You don’t have what older people have – a memory of recovering from it in your past.

Hey, Mom, said Max. How do you know that stuff?

Elaine laughed. I don’t know. I guess I like to study people’s behavior. She was glad to see that Josh looked more encouraged.

Tom caught up with the two brothers he worked for, Ray and Jack, and the other hired help, Frank, at the four thousand square foot new home that was their workplace for the next three days. The drywall on the first floor was installed except for the family room.

Ray opened a bucket of joint compound and then reached into his apron and said, Damn. Where’s my spackle knife?

Jack said, Don’t start that again. You mean your mudd trowel.

No I don’t. I can call it whatever I want, said Ray.

The plan was to finish mudding in the living and dining rooms by lunchtime.

Tom ignored the usual bickering and found a ladder and concentrated on his work and tried not to think about his personal life, which was like trying not to think about elephants. Jack and Ray argued about a radio talk show in the living room while Tom and Frank mudded silently in the dining room. Tom worked well for an hour but his worries about Josh and money kept coming back unbidden. Then he started to think about Bonnie again and lost his concentration. He ran his knife over the same joint one too many times and pulled out the compound that he had just finished smoothing.

Shit he said, loudly. I can’t do anything right today.

Jack wandered in from the living room and said, Come on down. Let’s take a break.

It’s not break time yet. We can’t stop in the middle of a room, Ray said, from around the corner.

Jack said, If Tom is screwing up, then it’s time for a break. Wassa matter with you? He started pounding the top onto his mudd bucket. Ray threw Jack the finger and glared.

Tom watched them go back and forth, waiting for a decision. Having two bosses that were locked in a perpetual wrestling match did not make for a clear chain of command. Frank, on his knees in the corner, decided to chime in. He always did that and Tom always got frustrated because it only prolonged the process.

Frank said, Tom’s got a right to screw up. He’s got personal problems.

Did I say he didn’t? said Ray. All I said was that it’s not break time yet. How am I supposed to enjoy my break if I’m looking at something that’s supposed to be finished and it isn’t? It’s not good for my disposition.

Ok. You keep working and we’ll take a break. You gotta learn to go with the flow man, said Jack.

All I’m sayin’ is that Tom’s going through some serious shit. We’ve got to take that into account, insisted Frank, apropos of nothing.

Tom was still standing on the ladder, spackle trowel in mid motion, with his mess drying on the wall. He wiped it off, because it would be easier than having to sand it down later, but he’d have to do the section over, and he didn’t know whether to start again or not.

In case you ladies haven’t noticed, this dining room isn’t finishing itself while we’re flapping our lips, so I guess break already started, said Jack.

Tom said, Well now that you all finally got that figured out….

Jack threw a rag into a trash bag and said, Yeah?

Tom didn’t know what he meant. He said, What yeah?

Jack was exasperated. Where’s the rest of that sentence? Did you lose it?

Then Tom was exasperated. What the hell are you talking about?

What comes after ‘Well now that you all finally got that figured out….?’

Oh. Right, said Tom.

Frank started to laugh. So what comes after it? You can’t just say ‘right’.

Tom started to laugh too. Since you insist, now that you all finally got that figured out, I need to go piss.

Ray said, I’m glad we all waited for that.

When Tom came back from flushing the sump pump in the basement they all had food spread out on a tarp in the studded out family room, which had a cathedral ceiling and a wall of glass looking out on a corresponding wall of glass a hundred feet away. They sat on empty five gallon buckets, and used their tool boxes for end tables.

After a few minutes of eating in silence, Frank said, So can I ask you something, Tom?

Tom said, OK what?

It must be really tough on your son to lose his mama at a young age like that.

Technically, that isn’t a question, Tom pointed out.

God Almighty, don’t start that stuff again, said Ray.

Frank ignored that, and Tom let it drop. Lately he’d been finding the jostling with the guys to be getting tiresome anyway. Frank went on, So how’s he doing, really? I feel so bad for him. A young pup like that. Right about halfway between a child and a man. I lost my Dad when I was that young. Losing Mom would’ve been a lot worse I think.

Tom was getting tired of acting like he was too tough to let this bother him, so instead of evading the subject as he had been doing for months now, he said, He wants his Mom. He’s always looking at me like he wants something that I don’t know how to give him. I don’t know what to do.

Maybe you should try to keep him busy to keep his mind off his problems, said Ray.

Yeah, I don’t know. I can’t fix what’s really wrong. I can’t bring Bonnie back and I don’t know how to make him feel better. There was a long pause and then Tom said, I know what I really need to do. I need to find someone else. And the sooner the better. We both have a big hole in our lives that needs to be filled.

Don’t be in a rush man. You aren’t thinking straight yet, said Jack.

Yes I am. I know exactly what to do. I just don’t know how to do it.

What are you saying? said Frank. You mean you have a woman in mind?

Tom nodded. Bonnie’s best friend Elaine. She’s been like a second mother to Josh all along anyway, and she’s never been married. She’s pretty too. All I have to do is convince her to marry us. I keep being afraid to make my first move because I don’t want to start out on the wrong foot.

I don’t know man. It seems awful drastic, said Jack.

Let me ask you something, Frank. Do you think you would’ve been better off if your Mom had found a new husband while you were still young?

You know what? I never thought about it, but now that you ask, I probably would’ve hated him at first, because he wasn’t my Dad. But after I got used to the idea, I think it would’ve been better than having no Dad at all. Unless he was a bum, of course.

Yeah. Now that you mention it, I’d get a new wife too, said Jack. It’s awful soon, but you can’t raise that kid by yourself.

Women raise kids by themselves all the time, said Ray.

Yeah but they’re women. We aren’t. We don’t have the right instincts, said Jack.

OK. So we’re with you, Tom, said Ray. He seemed to think that he actually had to approve of Tom’s plan. He nodded solemnly. Yep, it’s a go.

Send her lots of flowers. They always love that, said Frank.

Tom was relieved to find that they didn’t all think he was crazy. He said, She sells flowers for a living, actually. The guys laughed.

Yeah, well you’ll think of something. Good luck, said Jack.

Yeah. Good luck man. You need to get your charming-the-ladies skills out of mothballs, said Frank. They all laughed again. They seemed to be relieved that Frank’s foray into the world of feelings was over quickly.

Yep that’s it. I’ve got to shake off this funk that I’ve been in and get happy again, said Tom, with a definite nod.

That works for us, said Ray. You’ve been a pain in the ass, but you had a good reason.

Tom didn’t come home from work that night until nearly eight. Josh made himself an egg sandwich for about the twentieth time, skipped his homework and played video games until he heard the truck in the driveway.

Dad, Dad, guess what? he said running down the stairs to meet him at the front door. Tom was exhausted from working his regular shift plus four hours of repacking wheel bearings for another car he hoped to sell, but Josh didn’t notice. Guess what? he repeated when Tom showed no reaction.

What? Tom said, shedding his jacket and assorted paraphernalia on the couch, and heading for the refrigerator. The stink from the refrigerator offended both of them but not so much as to cause either of them to make any effort to locate the culprit.

I can still get back on the soccer team, and Aunt E said she’ll bring me home from practice. Cool, huh?

Oh. Yeah, that’s good, said Tom.

Josh spent the rest of the evening trying to get his father into a conversation that he could gradually lead around to the subject of meeting with the principal, but to no avail. Tom was trying to watch a basketball game on television and he finally snapped at Josh, who just wouldn’t shut up, Do you not see that I’m tired? You try working your ass off for twelve hours straight and see how chatty you feel at night.

Josh burst into tears and ran to his room. A little while later Tom knocked on the door and came in to apologize. Josh, I guess I better tell you something, said Tom. Tom felt sorry for the kid, but he didn’t know what else to do. He had to tell him sometime.

What? Josh sat up in the rumpled bed and wiped his eyes.

We might have to move. I wish we didn’t, but I can’t help it.

Josh was shocked. Dad, be serious, he said. I don’t want to move. Losing Mom was bad enough. How much do you think I can take?

I know. I know. I wish there was some other way. Tom chewed on his lower lip. He sat next to Josh on the bed and put his hand on Josh’s knee. It felt awkward. He suddenly realized that he should have set the scene better if he had something important to tell Josh, but it was too late now. Josh sat up straighter and stared at him.

Where do you want to move to? Josh asked, thinking that this was just a hare-brained impulse that he might be able to talk his father out of.

Josh, listen. I’m being serious, Tom said. I don’t want to move to anywhere, like another town or anything. We have to find a place that I can afford myself. Your Mom made as much as I did. We now have half as much money every month.

Oh shit, said Josh, eyes wide.

Watch your mouth, said Tom. Then, grinning, glad for an opportunity to lighten things up a bit, he said, Truth be told, I’ve already said enough ‘oh shits’ for both of us.

Maybe I could get a job, said Josh. Could we stay here then?

Hmmm, said Tom. I never thought of that. It’s real nice of you to offer.

Would it work? I could work after school and Saturdays. He looked hopeful. Tom was impressed.

I really appreciate the offer. But you wouldn’t be able to make enough money for what we need. Besides, what about sports?

I don’t want to move! Josh said. I’ll do anything. Tell me what to do.

It won’t be so bad. We’ll find an apartment near a park where you can still play outside.

A freaking apartment? Is that it? That sucks!

Try to look on the bright side, said Tom. I’m doing the best I can.

There isn’t any bright side, said Josh. What is the bright side?

Tom tried to think of one quickly. He wished he had thought about this conversation in advance. He tucked that thought away for future reference. Josh was waiting for an answer.

You’ll be able to walk to school and stuff like that until you’re old enough to drive, he said.

Big deal, said Josh. I know you can’t help it. I’m not mad at you. I’m just mad at the world.

Tom was touched. You’re a good kid, you know that? he said.

So when do we have to move? Josh asked.

I guess in three or four months. I have to find an apartment, and get this house sold. It will take some time.

Hey Dad, in case you haven’t noticed, the house is a pig sty.

"Yeah, I know. We’re going to have to spend our weekends packing and cleaning. We’ll make a game