The Road Home

By Naty Matos

He was finally coming. He told Desiree that once her task was complete, he would be there to pick her up. And they could finally be together forever. Desiree was finally going to be with the one she loved. But what did she need to do? And how was she going to figure out what it was?

Desiree’s life has been less than perfect. All she wanted was to find true love. To everyone on the outside she was beautiful, fun loving, and the life of the party. On the inside Desiree is afraid. Her fear of rejection places her in situations that will alter her life forever and possible tear her family apart. She has the love and support of a good friend, but more importantly she has her prayers. As Desiree makes changes in her own life, she slowly realizes that her dreams are within her reach. Journey with Desiree as she reflects on her life, through both good and bad times, to discover what is really preventing her from having the ultimate dream. True love!!!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Naty Matos
• Release date: Aug 29, 2012
• ISBN: 9781476473741

Naty Matos

Naty Matos was born in the city of New York. She grew up in the beautiful Island of Puerto Rico and now lives in the city of Atlanta. She holds a Bachelor's Degree in Clinical Psychology with a Minor in Mass Media Communications and a Master's Degree in Mental Health Counseling. Naty writes Christian fiction and non-fiction. She maintains a blog on Christian Living Topics at www.therisingmuse.com

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The Road Home

by Naty Matos

Copyright © 2012

Naty Matos/The Rising Muse

Smashwords Edition

***~~~***

The Road Home

Naty Matos/The Rising Muse Smashwords Edition

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise-without the written permission of the author. The only exception is brief quotation in printed reviews.

Dedication

To my Lord Jesus Christ,

for giving me the muse for this story

during one of the hardest times in my life.

Table of Contents

I’m Going Home

My First Born

Change of Trajectory

It’s All About Daniel and Aimee

The Struggle of Loneliness

The First Attempt at Real Love

My Sweet Maryann

Alone Again

Everybody Has Secrets

Real Love at Last

Hard Love, Hard Loss

Why Am I Still Here?

The Road That Leads Home

I’m Going Home

When Desiree woke up that day, she talked to her lover as she used to do every morning. Talking to him used to set the tone for the rest of her day. He had something important to tell her that day. He revealed to her that He would come to take her home with him that day if the conditions were favorable, but she needed to make it happen.

She was so in love with him and was looking forward to their encounter. This is what she had been waiting for since she’d met him. She rolled out of bed filled with the joy and expectation of what that day would bring. Desiree was still trying to figure out what she needed to do to make him come as soon as possible to get her. She was ready to embark on her new life with the love of her life. She took a long bath, to be presentable for the encounter. She brushed her hair and wrapped it up in a hairpin that her best friend gave her as a wedding present. She found a white floral dress in her closet, she felt like a bride in the expectancy of her groom; so nothing was more appropriate than that dress for when her lover would come to get her.

It was a beautiful day; it was not too hot, or too cold. There was a brisk breeze in the air. Desiree looked through the window and found the perfect spot to wait for her lover. She put soft sandals on her feet, and began to walk down the stairs towards the patio. She sat on a white wooden lawn chair that was carefully placed under a tree. Her house was right in front of a lake, and she was enjoying the view of the sun touching the water on the horizon on its way up to the sky. It was a great morning, the perfect one for her meeting with her lover. She remembered how they met. She closed her eyes as the waves of memories came about how he had seduced her with his love. They met through her best friend Aimee.

Desiree and Aimee had met in freshman year of college. They were the best of friends. Aimee was petite, with golden hair and olive eyes. She always looked serene; her voice was very sublime and soft, almost like listening to music. She was perceived by her college mates to be timid and reserved.

Desiree, on the other hand, was a rebel. She was tall and slim. She could have made a great model. Her skin was naturally tan and she had ebony hair. She had soft features and a wonderful smile.

Desiree had a very active social life. She was very well known on campus, even though she was only a freshman. Her reputation as a cheerleader in high school had followed her. Aimee, almost like a shadow, followed her everywhere, but without interacting much with Desiree’s followers. She was there because she felt the need to be there for Desiree. Even though they were the same age, Aimee felt like she was the big sister to the free-spirited Desiree.

Desiree remembered the first time they went to a fraternity party. Desiree had gotten drunk and some guys were trying to take her to one of the bedrooms. Her companions were looking for the perfect opportunity for a good score, and Desiree was not particularly against all the attention. Aimee was on the other side of the room when she saw Desiree being dragged up the stairs; not because she was being forced, but because she was so inebriated that she could barely stand on her own two feet. Aimee’s instinct told her that her friend was not in a consensual frame of mind and decided to intervene.

Where do you think you’re going? Aimee grabbed Desiree by the arm as the two young men, one on each side, helped Desiree up the stairs.

Back off, Nerd! Unless you want to join us, responded one of the college brats flirtatiously while continuing to take Desiree with him.

He’s my new friend. I’m going to be fine, Aimee. Wait for me at the dorm, Desiree responded, slurring her words.

I’m sorry Desiree, I can’t leave you here. Please come with me, Aimee pleaded with her friend. Desiree stopped and freed herself from the boys' arms and quickly considered her friend’s words.

Since Desiree met Aimee, she responded well to her. There was something about her she could never explain. She had always been allowed to do her will. Every time Aimee asked her to stay away from a situation she couldn’t deny her. It was something stronger than her. She respected her friendship and deep down she knew Aimee was right.

The college guy grabbed Desiree by the waist one more time, hoping she would follow him. She pushed the guy's hand off her waist. Sorry, I have to go with her, and started making movements down the stairs.

What do you mean, you have to go with her? You’re with us, babe, and besides, she’s not going to give you what I can. Or is it that there’s something going on between the two of you? demanded the college frat.

Desiree spun around and slapped the guy. You’re really sick! Apparently my friend was right about you. I’m going home, stated Desiree, gaining a quick moment of clarity.

The guy on her right side made a signal of defeat and walked away. The other guy was not conceding failure and grabbed her again, much tighter, as he whispered, No, Precious, come with me, as he squeezed her waist again and pushed her up the stairs. Desiree was trying to fight, but was not strong enough. She kept looking at Aimee as the guy was making progress with her up the stairs. Aimee approached the bottom of the stairs, trying to grab Desiree’s hand.

I swear, if you don’t let her go I’m going to start screaming and this party is going to come to a halt. Aimee stared at the college frat.

He became very frustrated. He looked at Aimee and said, Here! as he pushed Desiree on top of Aimee. Desiree tumbled down the stairs, pushing Aimee onto the floor. You can have her, and it’s not that big of a deal. In fifteen more minutes I can have someone else.

He addressed Desiree one more time. You may want to lose the chastity belt, my dear. He pointed at Aimee. With her around you’re not going to have any fun. Your legendary stories from high school are either fables or you didn’t have your Nanny with you back in those days. What a waste! He turned around and left.

Aimee pulled herself up off the floor. She helped Desiree to get up and they walked out of the fraternity house. In order to hail a cab, they walked down the street to the corner. Desiree began to feel shame. She felt ashamed not only because she realized she had gotten so drunk that she was going to make a bad decision, but also because Aimee had to rescue her from what could have been a very dangerous situation. Many thoughts were going through her mind. She kept running through her head the words the guy had uttered about her past. She was in a new town and didn’t know that her reputation had followed her. She thought that college was going to be a fresh start. She also thought that all the attention she was getting was related to being liked, not due to the fact that she was going to be used like a disposable object. All of those things combined made her feel ashamed.

When they arrived back to their dormitory Aimee helped her to get in bed. Desiree remained quiet. Aimee helped her out of her clothes and into her gray flannel pajamas. She tucked her in bed and watched her go to sleep.

Desiree woke up in the middle of the night sick from all the alcohol. Aimee helped her to the bathroom and stayed with her all night. Desiree, between sick moans, kept repeating, I don’t know why you’re my friend and you’re always helping me. Aimee didn’t respond as she kept trying to help her get cleaned up. She brought her from the bathroom and placed her in bed one more time. Desiree fell asleep. Aimee placed a cold towel over her head and sat by her side for a while, until she was sure that Desiree was sound asleep; then finally she went to bed.

The next morning, Aimee got up early, leaving Desiree sound asleep. She went to the cafeteria to eat breakfast. She also picked up some coffee and dry toast for Desiree and went back to the dorm. The noise from the door opening awoke Desiree.

Good Morning, Sunshine, Aimee said as she gave her a motherly smile, which was a little bit sarcastic, and a little bit honest.

Thanks again for last night, said Desiree. It’s not that I wasn’t in the mood for a score, but that guy was a real jerk. I really drank too much last night. Desiree groaned as she was propping herself up in the bed.

That’s what friends are for. You would have done the same for me, Aimee replied as she handed her the food she’d brought her.

I wouldn’t have to do it for you. You don’t do this kind of thing. I don’t even understand why you hang out with me. Actually, I don’t even know why you were at that party. It’s not like you were really enjoying yourself.

Somebody has to keep an eye on you. You want to be a lawyer, and I can’t deprive the world of the most argumentative lawyer ever, Aimee laughed. Desiree playfully threw one of her pillows at her friend.

Desiree lay in bed again. She observed Aimee from under the covers as Aimee tidied her side of the room. Desiree pondered about how different her life was living in the dorm with Aimee rather than at home with her mother.

Aimee was a devoted Christian and a member of the university's pastoral association. She not only attended their activities, but also tried to be very active at the church. Desiree was not sure if she even believed in God. Her mother had never taken her to church nor had she ever talked to her about God; except for using the popular cliché Oh my God, when something unexpected happened. Desiree didn’t understand why Aimee would get up every morning and get on her knees staring at the wall. It was not like the wall responded back. Desiree had those thoughts when she used to peek from under the covers in the morning and saw her friend immersed in her morning prayers. Although Aimee was not loud about her praises and prayers, Desiree would observe from a distance and was always intrigued. She was also intrigued about the book that her roommate read every night before going to bed. She found out that it was the Bible, and even though she had heard about the Bible, she had never opened one. To Desiree it was a book for the Christians; for those fanatics who were boring church people and were always talking about God. Well, she thought, maybe not all of them were boring. To Desiree, Aimee was the only non-boring Christian she knew; not that she knew many anyways. She found Aimee witty and fun. Yes, a little timid and quiet, but never judgmental.

Aimee would casually invite Desiree to church and other activities every time she had an opportunity, but as intrigued as Desiree was with the whole church and religion thing; she never thought of actually accompanying her. Aimee continued the invitations without pressure or showing feelings of disappointment toward her friend’s refusals. That whole feeding the homeless things was not for Desiree, she had stated; the thought of being near those stinky people gave her the creeps. Her mother always taught her that people made their own fortune. It was, after all their own fault that those people didn’t have a house, a job or decent clothes to wear.

My First Born

Back in her backyard, Desiree’s time to meet her lover was getting closer. She was so excited she felt her chest would explode. She had also forgotten to eat breakfast that morning. Her oldest son, Daniel, came to her side to bring her something to eat.

Momma, why don’t you come back inside? You’ve been out here for a while and we didn’t know that you were out here. I noticed that nothing was touched in the kitchen, so I figured you had not eaten anything. I don’t want you to have to go back to the hospital, said Daniel with concern.

It's ok, Sweetheart. I’m fine out here. I’m not hungry, but I appreciate it. Leave it there. Desiree pointed at a table next to the lawn chair. And I will eat it just for you. I know my love will be here today and I want to wait for him right here, she continued as she caressed her son’s hand.

What are you talking about, Mom? Please come inside with me, Daniel pleaded.

Desiree didn’t answer. She looked at the horizon. A fish broke from the water and took a dive.

Can’t you see, my son? I want to enjoy this moment. I want to embrace every second of this day, she responded with a warm smile.

Ok, Momma, just for a little longer, but then I’m taking you inside even if I have to drag you myself. I’ll go inside and bring you a blanket. I’m just concerned about you. You are acting strange.

Desiree didn’t answer and kept looking at a boat moving around the lake. It reminded her of when she had met Daniel’s father. It was the summer of her sophomore year in college. Some friends had decided to go to the beach and camp overnight. She was back in her hometown. Her mother was on vacation with her new boyfriend, so she was once again home alone. She got in the car with one of her best friends and headed to the beach party.

The day had been so much fun. They had sunbathed and eaten burgers and hot dogs. The group had lots of sodas and beers. The beach where they were hanging out was having a festival including a stage with live music. The lead singer entertained the crowd with small contests and dancing competitions. Desiree and her friends pushed through the crowd to be in front of the stage. This was not a famous band, but they liked the music and the ladies found the guys extremely attractive. The lead singer spotted Desiree in the crowd. As he sang the final song of their performance, he offered her his hand, pulled her onto the stage with him