Hags

By C.K. Niemand

Music is the only thing that really makes any sense to Gina anymore. Everything else has become a train of strange happenings, growing a bit more bizarre every day. She would probably be a little worried if she hadn't lost all ability to care some time ago. But now, she's about to embark on the most interesting journey of her life.

Nikki is beginning to realize her life has become almost completely meaningless and she has spent the last 20 years avoiding the very things that have brought her to this point. With the help of music and the best son a mother could ever hope for, she's going try to salvage what's left of her remaining days.

Trish is just trying to survive from one day to the next in the only way she's ever known. She also knows she's running out of options. But she's still a great guitarist and, while that alone won't sustain her, it will buy her room and board until she figures out her next move.

And Teri, well, Teri's existence is pretty much as stable and fulfilling as it always has been. Never discounting but always pushing ahead of the effluvium, she maintains focus. She's not looking for drama. She just wants to jam, man.

The only thing these women have ever had in common is music. Gina aside, Teri hasn't played with the best musicians she's ever known for more than twenty years. Because of her efforts and a series of luckily timed events, they get together one more time. Oh, hell no, they aren't going to be rock stars – they are way too old and haggy for that – but all of their lives will be forever changed, in one way or the other.

• Language: English
• Publisher: C.K. Niemand
• Release date: Jun 14, 2012
• ISBN: 9781476065755

C.K. Niemand

CK Niemand is an annoying absurdist who dabbles in music, writing, and casual observation. She has absolutely no talent for the visual arts and she can't sing in harmony to save her life. A paycheck collector by trade, she resides on a lonely and remote wind swept hillside with 42 gerbils and 117,471 Grandaddy Longlegs (population subject to change on a whim). Her hobbies include noodle crafts, finger snapping, magazine stacking, and smart-assery. At times, she tries to take things seriously in a futile attempt to break up the monotony of her rather meandering existence. She occasionally throws her attempts at creativity out into the ether using various monikers and pen names for no good reason at all.

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

Pull me back,

Pull me down.

I can't fix this,

As I am.

The light was so harsh. She thought it would be better down closer to the river, but no, the sun seared its rays of death straight through her head. There was little shade. No trees. Just a tiny porch overhang.

God, how can she live here? Gina mumbled to herself, I can already feel the melanoma eating away at me. She'd overdressed, too. What was she thinking? I gotta get back to the coast. This is madness. Gina laid down on the front porch and cranked up the Sansa. Music can fix everything.

She was driving. Everyone else was asleep in the back, sort of crunched and sprawled at the same time on the couch and the giant stuffed chair they insisted on cramming back there. Weak. The fog was intense and seemed to be closing in on the van. She was forced to drive slower and slower. Where's the fucking road? A truck with lights like a Christmas tree came up fast from behind, right on her ass. Back off, dick! She slowed down even more but the prick was not gonna let up. She moved the van over off the pavement to what looked like a way too small shoulder. The truck sped around and disappeared into the fog. Gina struggled to keep the van from tipping over as it rolled off the shoulder and onto a rocky surface. She clenched her teeth, waiting for the moans and bitching she was about to endure as the van slowly came to a stop. There was nothing but silence. Gina didn't turn around; she was too busy watching the fog as it dissipated and then completely disappeared in what seemed like seconds. Where the hell are we? Out the front window she could see a huge, white formation about five feet from the van. Bone? Hey...you guys...look at this thing...Gina turned around. The back of the van was completely empty. Nothing. What the fuck? Completely freaked, she jumped out of the front door of the van. She could barely breathe as she took in the endless desert all around her. Strange rock formations were everywhere. Birds, eggs, mushrooms, some as high as 60 feet. How could I not hit one? She was afraid to look behind the van. Everything...Everyone must have flown out the back door. Fuck...I killed them all. She placed her hands on the side of the van and pushed them ahead of her as she slowly walked around to view the carnage behind. No. There's nothing there. Nothing. She closed her eyes. Am I asleep or dead? Gina felt a thud in her side and someone yanking off the headphones. Neither.

God, Gina, I thought you were a homeless person. What the hell are you doing here?

Nikki! Gina jumped up and gave her a big hug. She stepped back to take a look and remembered the last time she saw Nikki. That beautiful woman, screaming at her, telling her what a heartless piece of crap she was. And now, more than 20 years later, Gina just couldn't help herself. Damn, girl...you got old.

Nikki's smile faded as she remembered what a little bitch Gina could be. You got fat, She stepped around Gina and opened the front door. – and old.

Gina followed her inside. I'm fat?

Fatter than you used to be. Nikki tossed her bag on the couch, sat down beside it, and motioned to a chair across the room. Sit down. You in town visiting your mom?

Gina sat down. This was not a good start, at all. She died a week ago. I'm here closing out her affairs. Mostly just tossing out all her stuff.

The news came as something of a sad shock to Nikki. Oh...man. I didn't know. Last time I saw her she looked like she was doing OK. Physically.

You saw my mom?

From time to time. Just to check in on her. But I haven't seen her in a few months. Nikki's gaze drifted away. When everything went to shit in LA, Gina's mom was one of the first people she'd thought to contact. She was such a good hearted person and seemed to know everyone in every town in the Southwest. She got Nikki a job and helped her find a place to live. They were pretty close up until the last couple of years when the dementia simply rendered her unable to recognize Nikki anymore. Nikki knew she didn't really have anyone else but her presence often brought about frightened reactions from the woman. She finally decided her visits were doing more harm than good and stopped going.

Why would you be checking in on her? Gina was perplexed. As far as she knew, Nikki had only met her mother once...a long long time ago.

Because you never did. Nikki was angry. I don't understand you. She was such a great person. Don't you remember how good she was to us when we were on tour? Free food, rooms at the hotels. I don't know what I would have done without her help when I moved out here. How could I just ignore her? How could you?

I don't like coming here. She understood that.

No, Gina, she didn't. You hurt her a lot.

Great, Gina thought to herself. Even Nikki knew Mom better than I did. God, I suck.

When's the funeral?

There wasn't one. A few of her friends from the center had a little party for her.

Nikki threw Gina a look of disapproval.

What? I would have called you! I didn't know!

This day was growing long. Nikki rubbed her fingers around her eyes and took a breath. Why are you here, at my house? I haven't heard from you in like...ever.

Teri asked me to come by. I figure she would have warned you.

Well, she didn't. Why did she want you to come here? You and I were never exactly best friends. That was putting it mildly. Nikki and Gina were fundamentally different people in every imaginable way and they never got along. It was amazing they were able to pull off three albums and four tours together.

You know she and I have been collaborating on some new material?

Yeah, from 600 miles apart. Pretty cool.

You really think so?

Yeah. I checked out your website. Gotta hand it to you. You guys can still play.

But? Gina could tell that Nikki was being diplomatic.

What do you want me to say, Gina? It's the same old inaccessible shit you guys always wrote. There's only a handful of people that will ever like it. Remember? That's why we broke up.

Teri said you liked it.

No, see, I like Teri and I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

But you have no problem hurting mine? Right, because you don't like me. I get it.

The Gina I remember was a good musician but a stubborn, cold hearted stone shaped liked a human being. And I don't see that you've changed at all.

Well, you're wrong. I changed a lot. Getting old does that to you. Except for Mom...I got no excuse for that. Gina folded her hands and looked down at the floor. Thanks for, you know, being there for her. I really failed that, huh?

Nikki could sense something that slightly resembled remorse from Gina. That's a start. Let's change the subject. She got up and looked out the front window.

I don't see a car parked outside. How did you get here?

I took the bus and walked about 45 miles to get here. Your fucking mass transit sucks.

It's a tiny city, Gina. You've lived in San Francisco so long you've forgotten what it's like out here.

Yeah, and in so many ways, too.

Where are you staying?

Nowhere. I'm almost outta money. I gotta head back.

You out of money? Gina...with the iron clad Protestant work ethic? The one who never had a problem making rent?

Like I said, things change. They really do. I got fired a few months ago. Seems I'm no longer 'engaged' with my work.

You'll find something else.

Maybe. I don't really care.

Wow...that's definitely not the Gina I remember.

Meh, Gina didn't want to talk about this. Where's your Harley?

Nikki laughed. Damn, girl, that Harley was BC. The car seat didn't fit very well.

Right, I 'spose not. Where is he? Gina considered the amount of time that had passed. God, how old is he?

17. He went to visit his father in New York over the summer. Says it's too boring here. So it's just me now. Nikki had been very lonely since Daniel left and wasn't sure he'd ever come back but she was not about to share that sort of thing with Gina, of all people.

Nikki looked out the window at the setting sun. Do you need a ride to the airport?

Greyhound, girl. That's all the money I got left.

When does it leave?

Tomorrow afternoon.

Stay here; I'll take you down there tomorrow.

You sure?

Yeah...you don't wanna stay at the bus station. You can tell me all about Teri's master plan and why she sent you here to see me. Wanna beer? Nikki headed toward the kitchen.

Gina smirked. I'm too fat and old for beer. Got any wine? Gina followed Nikki into the kitchen. The sunset through the living room window was burning into her eyes. Still smoke?

I never smoked. Nikki watched as Gina sat down at the table and pulled out a little glass apothecary jar. Really? Gina? And you never smoked that.

Purely medicinal. See? Things change. Gina rolled up a fatty like an old hippie and got it started. Nikki poured 2 glasses from a bottle of red and sat across the table. Blunt went back and forth as they continued the discussion.

So, tell me why Teri thought you should drop by.

"She thinks that the only reason you won't work with us is because of