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    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892
    Ebook93 pages40 minutes

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892

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    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 27, 2013
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892

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      Book preview

      Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, September 24, 1892 - Archive Classics

      The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 103,

      Sep. 24, 1892, by Various

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net

      Title: Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 103, Sep. 24, 1892

      Author: Various

      Release Date: March 15, 2005 [EBook #15366]

      Language: English

      *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH ***

      Produced by Malcolm Farmer, William Flis, and the Online Distributed

      Proofreading Team.

      PUNCH,

      OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

      Vol. 103.

      September 24, 1892.

      'ARRY AT 'ARRYGATE.

      DEAR CHARLIE,—Rum mix this 'ere world is, yer never know wot'll come next!

      Don't emagine I've sent yer a sermon, and treacle this out as my text;

      But really life's turn-ups are twisters. You lay out for larks, 'ealth, and tin,

      But whenever you think it's a moral, that crock, Unexpected, romps in.

      Who'd ha' thought of me jacking up suddent, and giving the Sawbones a turn?

      Who'd ha' pictered me Taking the Waters? Ah! CHARLIE, 'twos hodds on the Urn

      With Yours Truly, this time, I essure you. I fancied as Tot'nam-Court Road

      Would he trying its 'and on my tombstone afore the green corn wos full growed.

      Bad, CHARLIE? You bet! 'Twas screwmatics and liver, old Pill-box declared.

      Knocked me slap orf my perch, fair 'eels uppards. I tell you I felt a bit scared,

      And it left me a yaller-skinned skelinton, weak, and, wot's wus, stoney-broke.

      If it hadn't a bin for my nunky, your pal might have jest done a croak.

      Uncle NOBBS, a Cat's-butcher at Clapton, who's bin in luck's way, and struck ile,

      Is dead nuts on Yours Truly. Old josser, and grumpy, but he's made his pile.

      Saw me settin' about in the garden, jest like a old saffron-gill'd ghost

      A-waiting for cock-crow to 'ook it, and hanxious to 'ear it—a'most.

      Sez he, "Wy, the boy is a bone-bag! Wot's that? Converlescent? Oh, fudge!

      He's a slipping his cable, and drifting out sea-wards, if I'm any judge.

      I was ditto some twenty year back, BOB, and 'Arrygate fust set me up.

      Wot saved the old dog, brother ROBERT, may probably suit the young pup.

      "Carn't afford it? O'course yer carn't, JENNY; but—thanks be to 'orse-flesh—I can—"

      Well, he tipped us a fifty-quid crisp 'un—and ROOSE sent me 'ere; he's my Man!

      Three weeks' treatment! Well, threes into fifty means cutting a bit of a dash;

      Good grub, nobby togs, local doctor, baths, waters, and everythink flash.

      'Appy 'ARRY! sez you. But way-oh, CHARLIE! 'Arrygate isn't all jam.

      Me jolly? Well, mate, if you arsk me, I carn't 'ardly say as I ham.

      To spread myself out with the toppers is proper, no doubt, bonny boy;

      But—I wish it wos Brighton, or Margit, or somewheres a chap could enjoy.

      Oh, them Waters, old man!!! S'elp me never! yer don't kow wot nastyness is

      Till you've tried Sulphur 'ot and strong, fasting. The Kissing Gin, taken a-fizz,

      Isn't wus than ditch-water and sherbet; but Sulphur!!! It's eased my game leg;

      But I go with my heart in my mouth, and I feel like a blooming bad hegg.

      B-r-r-r-r! Beastliness isn't the

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