Terry:: My Daughter's Life-and-Death Struggle with Alcoholism

By George McGovern

NATIONAL BESTSELLER • “Raw and riveting . . . A compassionate reminder that every alcoholic was once somebody’s baby.”—USA Today

Just before Christmas 1994 Terry McGovern was found frozen to death in a snowbank in Madison, Wisconsin, where she had stumbled out of a bar and fallen asleep in the cold. Just forty-five years old, she had been an alcoholic most of her life. Now, in this harrowing and intimate reminiscence, her father, former Senator George McGovern, examines her diaries, interviews her friends and doctors, sifts through medical records, and searches for the lovely but fragile young woman who had waged a desperate, lifelong battle with her illness.

What emerges is the portrait of a woman who was loved by everyone but herself. Surrounded by devoted parents, caring siblings, and two young daughters of her own, Terry maintained an appearance of control but was haunted by the twin demons of alcohol and depression. Her story is a heartbreaking tale of her attempts at sobriety, the McGovern family’s efforts to help her—and the failure of both. With courage and compassion, George McGovern addresses a private tragedy with an honesty rarely achieved by a public figure, looking candidly at his inability to save his child. A primer for other families who live with addiction, McGovern’s book is filled with wisdom and an understanding that can come only from sharing his tremendous loss with others.

Praise for Terry

“Harrowing, riveting . . . A family drama of love and loss.”—The New York Times Book Review

“An agonized cry from the heart . . . McGovern’s abiding love for his daughter, and his anguish at the thought of failing her, scorch these pages.”—Newsweek

“Haunting . . . speaks for all families engaged in the private struggles of addiction.”—Washington Post

“The loving chronicle of a daughter who lost her life and a father who could not keep her alive . . . a simple, moving story that would touch the heart of any parent.”—Houston Chronicle

• Language: English
• Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
• Release date: Apr 17, 2013
• ISBN: 9780307830418

George McGovern

George McGovern, the Democratic Party's nominee for president in 1972, served in the House of Representatives from 1957 to 1961 and in the Senate for eighteen years. He was the president of the Middle East Policy Council in Washington, D.C., for six years and then served as ambassador to the UN Agencies on Food and Agriculture in Rome under President Clinton. He holds the Distinguished Flying Cross for service as a bomber pilot in World War II and the Presidential Medal of Freedom for humanitarian service.

Reviews for Terry:

[homeschoolmimzi · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I picked this book up at a library sale. I just might donate it back. The title suggests that the book is about McGovern's daughter Terry, but I couldn't help but notice how many times political campaigns entered in. And name dropping. It became irritating pretty quick. As well as McGovern's many parenthetical phrases to turn the focus on himself. ("in the primaries, all of which I won." ) McGovern's tone was defensive throughout the book: he repeatedly emphasized how the disease of alcoholism is genetic, how it has little to do with emotional upsets in childhood-the depression, chaos and self destruction therein is explained by the alcoholism itself. Cart before the horse, in my opinion. Somehow, McGovern convinces himself that his and Eleanor's upbringing had little or nothing to do with his daughter Terry's problems. The former senator and his wife quickly ushered Terry, pregnant and at the tender age of 15, out of state to have an illegal abortion. But, heck, no this didn't have anything to do with her later self destructive behaviors. His many many days, months, years, on the campaign and lecture circuit also didn't have anything to do with it. He virtually ignored his wife's postpartum depression as well, expecting her to bear the brunt of raising five children, even having her drive them cross country, while he finished up a press conference. Five young kids! I found his arguments faulty, his reasoning inconsistent, his lack of insight appalling and his whole tone arrogant and self serving. I wish someone else had written this book. A journalist who would have interviewed more people, someone who would not have discounted Terry's own entries from her diaries "Terry exaggerated her sister's jealousies." I felt so bad for Terry. She got a raw deal. Even after her tragic death.

[cubbyfan99 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

It took me for ever to read this rather short book. I should have set it down and walked away. I am struggling to find any redeeming factor.

[rob8larson · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Sad story, a quick read. I enjoyed it because addiction has touched my family as well. There are never any easy answers.

[santhony_35 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

My sister is a hopeless alcoholic. In reading a synopsis of this short work, I had hoped to develop a better understanding of the disease, along with possible strategies on how to deal with it. While the book is moderately educational in this respect, the case study of Teresa McGovern differs so substantially from that of my sister as to defy meaningful comparison. While McGovern is by all accounts a very good and nice person, who struggled mightily with depression as well as her addiction to drugs and alcohol, my sister is a bi-polar, paranoid schizophrenic who is brutally vicious and physically violent. Though they apparently share many of the same delusions of mistreatment and blame shifting, it is hard to relate the experiences of the two, and as a result, the usefulness of the book toward the purposes for which I purchased it are negligible.Of course, the book tracks Teresa’s life through the prism of George McGovern’s political career, and as a conservative, some of the gratuitous political pronouncements and backhanded, snide asides rubbed me the wrong way. In addition, as might be expected, McGovern is less than unbiased in much of his analysis, in effect blaming Madison police for failing to save his drunkenly unconscious daughter as she froze in a snow bank in a deserted, empty lot. He also takes a swipe at the University of Virginia for failing to admit his daughter into their college, despite what can only be described as a laughably spotty and less than stellar academic record. As you might expect, the book is filled with pop psychology, much of which is a stretch, at best.In any event, it is a sad case study of a remarkably damaged human being whose life was a virtual train wreck for most of the final thirty years of her life. I can’t really say that it would be helpful for others faced with similar circumstances, since there are no effective solutions or resolutions. I’m sure that there are instances where such cases are effectively addressed and resolved, however this was certainly not one of them.

[dougwood57 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

'Terry' is the heart-wrenching tale of the life and death of Terry, daughter of George McGovern. I was reduced to tears in the book's first 40 pages as he recounts her tragic death. The book was very personal to me because I have lost a daughter (in an auto accident) and alcohol abuse and dependence have disrupted my life. Of course, the setting is familiar to me as a resident of the Madison area (indeed the Teresa McGovern Treatment Center is located adjacent to my favorite local place to walk). And McGovern's quixotic 1972 presidential campaign was the first of many political campaigns upon which I have worked. Teresa McGovern simply could not stop drinking and in the end effectively drank herself to death. The book tells the excruciatingly sad tale how this bright, sensitive girl grew into an alcohol dependent. Despite untold attempts by herself and her family to get her to stop drinking, in the end the booze won. The book is a cautionary tale for 'recovered alcoholics' - Terry did stop drinking for some 8 years and had several other substantial bouts of sobriety. In the end, sobriety was more painful than drinking despite the incredibly painful consequences of her drinking. If you think you have the booze beaten, remember that it lurks in wait for you. The book does highlight the lack of any predictably succesful treatment for alcoholism. She tried many times to get cured, although she did not, apparently, try any non-AA programs. In one section McGovern simply records police, hospital, and detox center reports as she was taken repeatedly to detox. At the end of her life she was basically drinking to the point of incoherence and incontinence every day. One does wonder why the authorities did not attempt to have her committed involuntarily - but whether that would that have worked is highly doubtful. One thing McGovern does not mention is the woefully inadequate insurance coverage for AODA treatment. Even if you have insurance, it is likely that your policy severely limits the amount that will be paid to cover treatment. A powerful, honest, deeply felt book. The reader wants to reach out to McGovern and remind him that, in fact, he did try to help his daughter, it didn't work and her death from alcohol abuse really was not his fault. To drink or not to drink - only the drinker decides.