OPINION - 'I told her I lived in London and she called me pretentious': you can't be a Northern Londoner

You cannot be a Northerner and a Londoner. A Northern Londoner does not exist. Your entire London experience may be shaped by the fact you are a Northerner (the prices! the nice voices! the talking about different things happening in the world!) and yet you aren’t a Northerner. The minute you move down here, that’s you cast out of Northernness forever.

This is the paradox that sprung to mind as I tossed handfuls of notes at the festive treat that is Winter Wonderland, spending at a rate of roughly £10 per minute. What shocked me was not the