SIDELINES…

FINDING YOURSELF

After drinking with friends in Bursa province, Turkey, Beyhan Mutulu, 50, wandered off into a forest and did not return. His worried wife and friends alerted local authorities and a search party set out into the forest, where Mutulu later bumped into them and decided to join in. He took part in the search for several hours before members of the party started calling out his name and he replied: “I am here!” When taken aside by a police officer for a statement he said: “Don’t punish me too harshly, officer. My father will kill me.” BBC News, 1 Oct 2021.

MAMMON

During a four-day telethon, a right-wing evangelical pastor claimed Jesus has not yet returned because people aren’t donating enough money to their churches, saying: “I honestly believe this – the reason why Jesus hasn’t come is