Pain is the dogged companion of an ultra runner. Run for long enough, and it slinks out of the bushes eventually. We can try to push it away, ignore it, bargain with it, wrestle it, even hold its hand as we push into deeper dark. It waxes and wanes, but pain is always there, urging us on, making the finish line taste that much sweeter. We relish the pain, knowing it will (usually) end.
Imagine experiencing a physical pain so great, so persistent, that you would do anything you could to stop it. It’s a pain that does not come with the high of a long run or medal at the end. It is all-encompassing, affecting your everyday life. It crushes you. In your pursuit to end the pain, you end up feeling nothing, for years. And you can’t tell anyone, not even your family, because you’re ashamed. The numbness erases your sense of self, and you end up craving to feel anything, even pain, to feel alive again.
This was the reality US ultra runner Patrick Vaughan faced for most of his 20s and 30s. Chronic neck and back pain pushed him into a 10-year nightmare of painkiller and heroin addiction. Incredibly, he turned his life around, discovered trail running, and set the fastest known time (FKT) on the rugged 470km Lebanon Mountain Trail. In the process, he began to heal.
Patrick gives an emotional re-telling of his courageous story is the short film, , directed by Bachar Khattar and featured in the RunNation Film Festival 2020/2021 World Tour. This film, featuring exquisite scenery as the backdrop for
