RUNNING INTO JOY

I’ve battled a deep and insistent melancholy—an undercurrent of sorrow that seems almost intrinsic to who I am. Growing up I countered this sadness with a lot of effort, a lot of doing. I was always pushing—pushing to be the first, to be the best, to do and be more, always more, and the rush I got from this constant striving and achieving mostly kept my moods at bay. Then I encountered Zen practice and found a welcome refuge in zazen. While sitting still I realized there was nothing I needed to prove, no imagined fault I needed to fix.