'The Man They Wanted Me To Be' Puts An Individual Experience In Broader Context

When I was kid in school, I was bullied a lot. Like many who have been bullied, I still carry the pain.

Back then I didn't know why I was being bullied; I just figured there was something wrong with me. As I got older, however, I noticed more and more what my former bullies performed: toxic masculinity. And for as long as I can remember, I've been repelled by its expressions: quickness to anger; violence; pride in ignorance; self-protective stoicism; dead-eyed, predatory staring. Only in early adulthood did I start to see the problem, explicitly, for what it was.

This is all tostruck a very personal chord in me. But really, though, enough about me. This book is critically important to our historical moment. It's also really good — and Sexton's voice is unrelentingly present in it. It crackles with intensity and absolutely refuses to allow the reader to look away for even a moment from the blight that toxic masculinity in America has wrought.