The 25 Songs Of 'Crazy Ex-Girlfriend' Season 3, Rigorously And Definitively Ranked
Another season of the darkly brilliant series Crazy Ex-Girlfriend has come to an end, and now, as has happened twice before, it falls to me the doughty task of sorting its original songs — 25 of them, this year — into a clear-eyed, dispassionate, purely objective, precision-engineered ranking that gleams with the cold light of surgical steel.
Said ranking, moreover, is based on a scientific application of the Rules of Musical Comedy Efficiency And Excellence, which are totally real, verifiable things and not something I just made up, but don't bother to check on that because their real verifiable thingness is known only to a select inner circle of us big-time professional-type critics.
As always, you may disagree with this ranking, in whole or in part. If you do, you would be well-advised to just sort of steep there in your arrant wrongness, which is great and terrible to behold, and also eminently provable, because, as I believe I have mentioned, science.
Once again, the usual caveats apply: We are evaluating each number's effectiveness as a standalone song, apart from the show's visuals. More importantly: NO REPRISES ARE ELIGIBLE FOR CONSIDERATION, because — sing along with me — reprises make the data noisy. That means Rebecca's fierce wedding-aisle redux of "After Everything You Made Me Do (That I Didn't Ask For);" the winkingly meta — make that muggingly meta — "He's the New Guy;" that wrenchingly sad second bite of the "Face Your Fears" apple; and Trent's note-perfect "I'm Just a Boy in Love," didn't make the cut.
This season, as always, the show's commitment to squeezing the writing, scoring, rehearsing, recording, choreographing and performing of this many full-bore, pull-out-the-stops
